"Eat it- one day won't hurt!"
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I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or they are genuinely more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc. I eat out pretty often so if i ask for advice from a menu,I don't need to be told "one day won't hurt" because hello that could be every day!
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!0 -
Then it's a different question, isn't it? Or am I missing something?I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or genuinely am more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc.
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!0 -
Sorry I edited it a bit, but I'm not sure how it's a different question?0
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Why when someone posts a topic asking for help turning a birthday treat down or asking for any advice on how to stay within their calorie goals do people comment that "one day won't hurt you" and "go ahead and indulge it won't kill you"
They posted a topic for advice on something and those people are totally going against what the OP was asking for.
Why not offer encouraging things like "do some extra cardio in the morning if you really want to eat a sweet treat" or bring some snacks with you to have later so you arn't tempted to buy the fattening food"
We are all here (or should be) for the same purpose. Why would you encourage someone to eat calorie filled foods when they are specifically asking for help to stay away from them?
I might get a lot of crap for this but I am honesly just curious.
Because when people ask other people for advice, we tend to assume they are grown-ups and can handle being told the opposite of what they want to hear (in this case "drop the slice of birthday cake and run far away from it").0 -
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You're absolutely correct. But if a person is that sensitive to triggers, then they probably shouldn't be soliciting dietary advice from random, anonymous strangers, now should they?Because some people don't understand how a single lapse can lead to binge eating.
Because food is associated with so many things that are not food...there are cultural and personal meanings that affect the way you approach eating.0 -
Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.
One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.0 -
No one's asking that though. If someone came on and said "I really want to eat more than my calorie goal every single day" they wouldn't get the same advice. The point about these posts is that it is one day. It's a birthday, or a holiday, it amounts probably a handful of days over the year. It's about how to handle balancing weight loss goals with everyday life.
If someone came to these forums and asked "should I eat.." about each meal individually for a year, that person would gain at least 100 pounds.
Yes, we agree. My point is that nearly every response will encourage eating. So if someone actually did pose the question for every meal individually, and took the advice, that person would gain very quickly. If you want to eat some of your birthday cake, go for it! If you want to eat a bacon cheeseburger tonight, fabu! If you want to have a yummy waffle breakfast, go get em!
The "special occasion" element of responses tends to get underplayed, but it's the most important part of the equation. More responsible responses would all include disclaimers, but this is an internet forum.
Contrary to popular opinion, not everyone on here is always hungry.But the entire point of the app is to track and eat in moderation. So don't be the idiot asking a bunch of hungry people "should I eat.." on the internet. Eat it or don't. Up to you.
Some people are using the app to maintain or gain. However, the majority of posters seem to be on calorie restrictions, and respond to questions about food as if they're ravenous.0 -
I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or genuinely am more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc.
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!
Mostly, the problem is that people don't properly frame the question. In that case, you might say, yesterday I binged and ate X over my calories. The day before also. I feel like I'm slipping. Tomorrow is a party, and there will be cake and food. I want to get back on track. Any suggestions?
See the difference. In that case, you might get more proper responses to the situation. When people tell the whole story and frame it properly, typically, they get good responses and suggestions. It's when they aren't clear, or just say something kind of flip where they get the same back.
Ehh, I see what you're saying but that's not a question of it not being properly framed - if the question is "what is something healthy I can order from this menu?" And people say just splurge, they just aren't answering the question. Sure a backstory is helpful, but I don't always feel like I have to explain everything to death you know? Like obviously I'm asking because I want to know what will probably be the best choice - I'm not asking to have people tell me it doesn't matter, because it does to ME.
This is probably a huge pet peeve for me because it has been drilled into my head to just answer the question that is asked, so I am extra annoyed by it :P0 -
Because if you're a grown adult and can't politely manage to turn down a treat you aren't interested in or unaware of how to plan ahead for snacking crisises...then just go ahead and eat it and don't freak out.
How many people ask, How do I say no to an office snack. . . seriously??? Just say no thank you. Do you not have enough self confidence to "Stand up" to the office "snack bully"???
And, in life, there will be snacks, birthday parties/anniversaries, holidays. IF you can't enjoy food AND still make progress. . .the issues go WAY beyond food. Food is just the current symptom of a much larger control/self esteem issue.
My anger may or may not be aggravated by the massive hives I have from a bad reaction to some medication.
One of the things that I had to learn (and am still learning) is how to not let these types of things affect my progress. I'm a huge believer in the 'one snack/cake/day' won't hurt, but I also know that sometimes when I don't lose weight for a week/month it is because of these 'one-time' things. They do add up, and it can be hard to stay vigilant all the time. So when I see these posts of "how do I stay on track", sometimes I know the person is just looking for motivation and that extra push to be able to stay vigilant - that's what we are here for, right?0 -
I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or they are genuinely more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc. I eat out pretty often so if i ask for advice from a menu,I don't need to be told "one day won't hurt" because hello that could be every day!
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!
When you pose your question, you should preface it by saying that you eat out all of the time. Also...if you eat out all of the time, I'd think you'd have more answers than most.
I eat out maybe once or twice per month...my answer is always going to be "go nuts" unless I know that eating out is a regular part of your lifestyle.0 -
Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
right, but every day it is just 'one', and those 'ones' add up!0 -
Although I'm just getting back into MFP, the biggest reason I was successful before (40 lbs lost over 10 months) was that I didn't deprive myself of the occasional "one day", or of any food, for that matter. I just learned to deal with things in moderation - like eating out less often, choosing the smaller size of my favorite calorie-loaded coffee beverage, indulging in treats but paying attention to the recommended portion size (rather than eating, say, a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's).
(My reasons for falling off-track had nothing to do with what I was or wasn't eating, either.)0 -
Because a lot of us aren't enablers and thus don't like giving people bad advice.Why when someone posts a topic asking for help turning a birthday treat down or asking for any advice on how to stay within their calorie goals do people comment that "one day won't hurt you" and "go ahead and indulge it won't kill you"
They posted a topic for advice on something and those people are totally going against what the OP was asking for.
Why not offer encouraging things like "do some extra cardio in the morning if you really want to eat a sweet treat" or bring some snacks with you to have later so you arn't tempted to buy the fattening food"
We are all here (or should be) for the same purpose. Why would you encourage someone to eat calorie filled foods when they are specifically asking for help to stay away from them?
I might get a lot of crap for this but I am honesly just curious.0 -
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If your one birthday a year somehow counters your progress for the entire year, you are doing something very wrong.0
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Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
This - I used to be restrictive then I realized I was killing myself trying. One day/treat/meal won't kill you, and it won't screw up all the progress you made. People need to learn that.
Just because I eat a piece of chocolate doesn't mean I'm going to gain my 16 pounds back (or the total 43 I've lost over the past 2 years). so once in a while, indulge, enjoy it, and kick *kitten* the next day.0 -
Context, context, context.
Often times the missed context is that what they're asking is for ways to thwart people they perceive to be sour apples who are jealous of their success. While one day in and of itself isn't much, in reality they're asking about how to address something they believe will happen over and over again.0 -
I have had a lot of success too by not being super restrictive on what I eat so long as I am totally honest about it and truthfully logging it all in MFP. I believe the key is the daily food and exercise log because I don't automatically know what "moderation" means unless I am writing it down to get an objective view of what I am eating.
Congrats on your weigh loss and bravo for consistently tracking for so long! I am up to 150 straight days of tracking.0 -
Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
right, but every day it is just 'one', and those 'ones' add up!
You're missing the point entirely. People give this answer when it's, "I've been really good and today is my birthday...I'm really trying to not have cake." Answer...you've been really good...it's your birthday...eat ****in' cake. If you're on here and generally asking if you should eat like **** everyday, I think you might have bigger issues that should be addressed with a professional.
Also...and it's been said by me and others...it's about your overall dietary lifestyle. Are you not going to eat cake for the rest of your life? If you're stupid enough to make a lifestyle out of eating **** then yeah...nothing good is going to come of that...if you're smart enough to know that you can get your nutrition on and get your fitness on while still indulging in the things that you love once in awhile, then you will have great success and will have made it a lifestyle.
Really, I don't see how this is so hard for people to grasp.0 -
Because if you're a grown adult and can't politely manage to turn down a treat you aren't interested in or unaware of how to plan ahead for snacking crisises...then just go ahead and eat it and don't freak out.
How many people ask, How do I say no to an office snack. . . seriously??? Just say no thank you. Do you not have enough self confidence to "Stand up" to the office "snack bully"???
And, in life, there will be snacks, birthday parties/anniversaries, holidays. IF you can't enjoy food AND still make progress. . .the issues go WAY beyond food. Food is just the current symptom of a much larger control/self esteem issue.
My anger may or may not be aggravated by the massive hives I have from a bad reaction to some medication.
SO MUCH THIS!!!!!0 -
Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.
One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.
Realize: There is no wagon!!0 -
I have found that it helps to continue to faithfully log all the food I am eating even if I am not restricting my diet on vacation. I can eat it so long as I record it. Don't throw out all the habits that have brought you success just because you've decided to eat different foods over vacation.0
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Also...and it's been said by me and others...it's about your overall dietary lifestyle. Are you not going to eat cake for the rest of your life? If you're stupid enough to make a lifestyle out of eating **** then yeah...nothing good is going to come of that...if you're smart enough to know that you can get your nutrition on and get your fitness on while still indulging in the things that you love once in awhile, then you will have great success and will have made it a lifestyle.
Really, I don't see how this is so hard for people to grasp.
It's very simple. But without constant and mind-boggling misunderstanding of basic principles, these forums would consist of mainly chit chat about dating avatars.0 -
As people have already said, it really depends on the OP and their attitude toward the cake. If they seem to be afraid of it, then a lot of people are going to give responses that speak to that; namely, that one piece of cake really won't kill you. It's about encouraging the OP to try to have a less restrictive (and more manageable) perspective on food. Now, if the OP frames the question such that it is clearly about caloric deficits and a string of bad days, etc, I think people are generally more supportive of the OP's hesitancy to eat the cake. But as someone else said, we aren't here to enable someone's unhealthy fear of food. If the OP is just afraid of "bad" food, obviously that doesn't make any sense to many of us and we won't support that kind of thinking.0
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Because really, one treat one day is not going to kill you. I've had a lot of treats in the 6 months I've been on MFP and they've always fit in my calorie goal.0
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One day with cake and pizza and all that kind of stuff won't hurt anyone's progress, any more than one day of calorie restriction will make you lose weight.
The ONLY way it could derail someone is the psychological aspect. Say they eat some "junk" and feel guilty, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess. Or if they eat some "junk" and see a spike on the scale the next morning, not realizing it's just a fluctuation and water weight, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess.
Keep going forward. Realize there's going to be speed bumps and detours along the way, but they're not roadblocks, and won't send you back to "start."
Unless you let them.0 -
Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.
And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.
I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.
One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.
Realize: There is no wagon!!
...lol seriously though: There IS a wagon: you either live a healthy, reasonable lifestyle, or you don't. Whether that second option is hyper-restrictive dieting or constant overindulgence doesn't matter. You simply have to choose which wagon you want to try to be on, in the end.0 -
Anybody who throws a problem out there has to be prepared to accept all opinions, I think. I do try to give them what they asked for, but sometimes it's just impossible - like the member who is already underweight asking how to lose 5-10 more pounds. That's just crazy!0
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One day with cake and pizza and all that kind of stuff won't hurt anyone's progress, any more than one day of calorie restriction will make you lose weight.
The ONLY way it could derail someone is the psychological aspect. Say they eat some "junk" and feel guilty, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess. Or if they eat some "junk" and see a spike on the scale the next morning, not realizing it's just a fluctuation and water weight, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess.
Keep going forward. Realize there's going to be speed bumps and detours along the way, but they're not roadblocks, and won't send you back to "start."
Unless you let them.
I agree 100% with this, and it happens a lot unfortunately. I feel like when people post these "should I eat my birthday cake" threads, they are posting because they are terrified that this exact scenario will happen to them. Whether or not it's likely for the OP in any instance doesn't really matter-- fear is often very irrational, as are expectations when it comes to things like losing weight or getting fit.
The responses, therefore, are never very supportive of that fear. But then again it's forums... so... yeah.0
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