"Eat it- one day won't hurt!"

Witchdoctor58

Because some people don't understand how a single lapse can lead to binge eating.

Because food is associated with so many things that are not food...there are cultural and personal meanings that affect the way you approach eating.

jwdieter

A lot of people here really like to talk about the food they want to eat. The advice for almost anything will be "EAT IT!!!" Or "PUT A BACON AND CHEESE ON IT!!!"

If someone came to these forums and asked "should I eat.." about each meal individually for a year, that person would gain at least 100 pounds.

But the entire point of the app is to track and eat in moderation. So don't be the idiot asking a bunch of hungry people "should I eat.." on the internet. Eat it or don't. Up to you.

Sactown900

I agree. I"ll have 2nds (or desert or a beer), one day a week, because I know if I deny all that stuff, one day soon I'll have three PBJs, 10 cookies or most of an apple pie. I am strict the other six days a week.

Probably how I FINALLY lost the 30 lbs I've tried to loose for the last 30 years. LMBO!

Alluminati

Because some people don't understand how a single lapse can lead to binge eating.

Because food is associated with so many things that are not food...there are cultural and personal meanings that affect the way you approach eating.

Cause no one else on here could possibly have had the same issues/associations with food, so they should just smile, nod, and tell people what they wanna hear.

Got it.

cwolfman13

I guess one other thing is this. For me, my goals are not a destination. They are simply a target. It is a life target. If I cannot incorporate a piece of birthday cake once in a while, then the whole thing is total bullsh*t. Birthday cake is a symbol of a celebration of life. You need to learn how to be happy and enjoy things like that in your life.

Very well put...

4jamaica

I am facing a similar situation. I am leaving for a cruise in just under 60 days and I am doing really well with my weight loss and exercise. I have decided I will eat a normal breakfast & lunch and then allow myself what I want for dinner. I figure it is 10 days out of 365 days and I want to have happy memories, not come back feeling sour because of all the things "I couldn't have". I will also continue doing my walking and strength training while I am away.

Completely off topic, but the last cruises I've gone on I have managed to not gain weight by doing shore excursions that are extremely active and *always* taking the stairs. If you are on a big ship, that can amount to hundreds of steps a day as you go down to the shore excursion, up to the room, up further to eat, down to watch a show, etc. I don't do stair master workouts normally, so I wasn't used to the stairs and found it an easy way to keep active!

Mom2QJandT

I think that it depends on where you are with it. For someone that is an emotional or binge eater and is just now feeling a sense of control, one piece of cake is enough to throw off that delicate balance. I know that I can't eat at pitch-ins for work. I can't do it. It triggers bad, bad things in my brain. I live my life, I go on vacation and gain 5 lbs in wine, I go to a ball game and I eat a hot dog, but I CANNOT eat at the office pitch-in. The emotion and psychological side of all of this (for those of us that were morbidly obese at one time) is key in long term success. If you're a person that doesn't have those issues, then your experience will be different.

That said, when you ask the public for advice on handling a situation, you have to realize that some suggestions aren't going to be what you need to do. You have to know yourself and what you need and be willing to put that first.

JesterMFP

Why when someone posts a topic asking for help turning a birthday treat down or asking for any advice on how to stay within their calorie goals do people comment that "one day won't hurt you" and "go ahead and indulge it won't kill you"
They posted a topic for advice on something and those people are totally going against what the OP was asking for.
Why not offer encouraging things like "do some extra cardio in the morning if you really want to eat a sweet treat" or bring some snacks with you to have later so you arn't tempted to buy the fattening food"
We are all here (or should be) for the same purpose. Why would you encourage someone to eat calorie filled foods when they are specifically asking for help to stay away from them?

I might get a lot of crap for this but I am honesly just curious.

Not everyone is here for the same reason.

I'm here, at least partly, to try to develop a healthier relationship with food. For me, it has been important to learn that one treat, one meal, one day etc really doesn't hurt. It's never that one day that makes someone fat, or stops someone losing weight. It's how you eat most of the time that determines your success, or lack thereof.

In my opinion, only allowing yourself to "indulge" in eating some food that you like, or a special birthday treat, if you've done the required amount of cardio, doesn't encourage a healthy relationship with food or exercise. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with exercising with the intention of burning calories, to allow more room for food. I do that sometimes. I just don't like the thought of exercise as punishment for eating "bad food", or exercise as a condition for "letting" yourself eat the food you like. It's a subtle difference, but I don't like the implication that you can only have your birthday treat if you've done your duty and exercised first.

Food is just food. It's not bad. Calories aren't bad. Food isn't "fattening" unless you eat too much of it. I think that's really the approach people are going for with that kind of advice.

Of course, there are people who are quite happy to permanently give up those kinds of foods, but they're not usually the ones asking for help in turning it down.

JesterMFP

If someone came to these forums and asked "should I eat.." about each meal individually for a year, that person would gain at least 100 pounds.

No one's asking that though. If someone came on and said "I really want to eat more than my calorie goal every single day" they wouldn't get the same advice. The point about these posts is that it is one day. It's a birthday, or a holiday, it amounts probably a handful of days over the year. It's about how to handle balancing weight loss goals with everyday life.

But the entire point of the app is to track and eat in moderation. So don't be the idiot asking a bunch of hungry people "should I eat.." on the internet. Eat it or don't. Up to you.

Contrary to popular opinion, not everyone on here is always hungry.

UrbanLotus

I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or they are genuinely more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc. I eat out pretty often so if i ask for advice from a menu,I don't need to be told "one day won't hurt" because hello that could be every day!
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!

JesterMFP

I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or genuinely am more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc.
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!

Then it's a different question, isn't it? Or am I missing something?

UrbanLotus

Sorry I edited it a bit, but I'm not sure how it's a different question?

HacheraTsarine

Why when someone posts a topic asking for help turning a birthday treat down or asking for any advice on how to stay within their calorie goals do people comment that "one day won't hurt you" and "go ahead and indulge it won't kill you"
They posted a topic for advice on something and those people are totally going against what the OP was asking for.
Why not offer encouraging things like "do some extra cardio in the morning if you really want to eat a sweet treat" or bring some snacks with you to have later so you arn't tempted to buy the fattening food"
We are all here (or should be) for the same purpose. Why would you encourage someone to eat calorie filled foods when they are specifically asking for help to stay away from them?

I might get a lot of crap for this but I am honesly just curious.

Because when people ask other people for advice, we tend to assume they are grown-ups and can handle being told the opposite of what they want to hear (in this case "drop the slice of birthday cake and run far away from it").

almc170

Because some people don't understand how a single lapse can lead to binge eating.

Because food is associated with so many things that are not food...there are cultural and personal meanings that affect the way you approach eating.

You're absolutely correct. But if a person is that sensitive to triggers, then they probably shouldn't be soliciting dietary advice from random, anonymous strangers, now should they?

Nishi2013

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.

One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.

jwdieter

If someone came to these forums and asked "should I eat.." about each meal individually for a year, that person would gain at least 100 pounds.

No one's asking that though. If someone came on and said "I really want to eat more than my calorie goal every single day" they wouldn't get the same advice. The point about these posts is that it is one day. It's a birthday, or a holiday, it amounts probably a handful of days over the year. It's about how to handle balancing weight loss goals with everyday life.

Yes, we agree. My point is that nearly every response will encourage eating. So if someone actually did pose the question for every meal individually, and took the advice, that person would gain very quickly. If you want to eat some of your birthday cake, go for it! If you want to eat a bacon cheeseburger tonight, fabu! If you want to have a yummy waffle breakfast, go get em!

The "special occasion" element of responses tends to get underplayed, but it's the most important part of the equation. More responsible responses would all include disclaimers, but this is an internet forum.

But the entire point of the app is to track and eat in moderation. So don't be the idiot asking a bunch of hungry people "should I eat.." on the internet. Eat it or don't. Up to you.

Contrary to popular opinion, not everyone on here is always hungry.

Some people are using the app to maintain or gain. However, the majority of posters seem to be on calorie restrictions, and respond to questions about food as if they're ravenous.

UrbanLotus

I haaaaaate this answer! Sure one day won't hurt, but what if i splurged the day before? Or genuinely am more concerned about my cals than splurging, etc.
People often don't answer the question that is asked, not helpful!

Mostly, the problem is that people don't properly frame the question. In that case, you might say, yesterday I binged and ate X over my calories. The day before also. I feel like I'm slipping. Tomorrow is a party, and there will be cake and food. I want to get back on track. Any suggestions?

See the difference. In that case, you might get more proper responses to the situation. When people tell the whole story and frame it properly, typically, they get good responses and suggestions. It's when they aren't clear, or just say something kind of flip where they get the same back.

Ehh, I see what you're saying but that's not a question of it not being properly framed - if the question is "what is something healthy I can order from this menu?" And people say just splurge, they just aren't answering the question. Sure a backstory is helpful, but I don't always feel like I have to explain everything to death you know? Like obviously I'm asking because I want to know what will probably be the best choice - I'm not asking to have people tell me it doesn't matter, because it does to ME.

This is probably a huge pet peeve for me because it has been drilled into my head to just answer the question that is asked, so I am extra annoyed by it :P

elainecroft

Because if you're a grown adult and can't politely manage to turn down a treat you aren't interested in or unaware of how to plan ahead for snacking crisises...then just go ahead and eat it and don't freak out.

How many people ask, How do I say no to an office snack. . . seriously??? Just say no thank you. Do you not have enough self confidence to "Stand up" to the office "snack bully"???

And, in life, there will be snacks, birthday parties/anniversaries, holidays. IF you can't enjoy food AND still make progress. . .the issues go WAY beyond food. Food is just the current symptom of a much larger control/self esteem issue.

My anger may or may not be aggravated by the massive hives I have from a bad reaction to some medication.

One of the things that I had to learn (and am still learning) is how to not let these types of things affect my progress. I'm a huge believer in the 'one snack/cake/day' won't hurt, but I also know that sometimes when I don't lose weight for a week/month it is because of these 'one-time' things. They do add up, and it can be hard to stay vigilant all the time. So when I see these posts of "how do I stay on track", sometimes I know the person is just looking for motivation and that extra push to be able to stay vigilant - that's what we are here for, right?