"Eat it- one day won't hurt!"

LiftAllThePizzas

Why when someone posts a topic asking for help turning a birthday treat down or asking for any advice on how to stay within their calorie goals do people comment that "one day won't hurt you" and "go ahead and indulge it won't kill you"
They posted a topic for advice on something and those people are totally going against what the OP was asking for.
Why not offer encouraging things like "do some extra cardio in the morning if you really want to eat a sweet treat" or bring some snacks with you to have later so you arn't tempted to buy the fattening food"
We are all here (or should be) for the same purpose. Why would you encourage someone to eat calorie filled foods when they are specifically asking for help to stay away from them?

I might get a lot of crap for this but I am honesly just curious.

Because a lot of us aren't enablers and thus don't like giving people bad advice.

ironanimal

If your one birthday a year somehow counters your progress for the entire year, you are doing something very wrong.

michellechawner

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

This - I used to be restrictive then I realized I was killing myself trying. One day/treat/meal won't kill you, and it won't screw up all the progress you made. People need to learn that.

Just because I eat a piece of chocolate doesn't mean I'm going to gain my 16 pounds back (or the total 43 I've lost over the past 2 years). so once in a while, indulge, enjoy it, and kick *kitten* the next day.

corgicake

Context, context, context.

Often times the missed context is that what they're asking is for ways to thwart people they perceive to be sour apples who are jealous of their success. While one day in and of itself isn't much, in reality they're asking about how to address something they believe will happen over and over again.

leonaedithlewis

I have had a lot of success too by not being super restrictive on what I eat so long as I am totally honest about it and truthfully logging it all in MFP. I believe the key is the daily food and exercise log because I don't automatically know what "moderation" means unless I am writing it down to get an objective view of what I am eating.

Congrats on your weigh loss and bravo for consistently tracking for so long! I am up to 150 straight days of tracking.

cwolfman13

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

right, but every day it is just 'one', and those 'ones' add up!

You're missing the point entirely. People give this answer when it's, "I've been really good and today is my birthday...I'm really trying to not have cake." Answer...you've been really good...it's your birthday...eat ****in' cake. If you're on here and generally asking if you should eat like **** everyday, I think you might have bigger issues that should be addressed with a professional.

Also...and it's been said by me and others...it's about your overall dietary lifestyle. Are you not going to eat cake for the rest of your life? If you're stupid enough to make a lifestyle out of eating **** then yeah...nothing good is going to come of that...if you're smart enough to know that you can get your nutrition on and get your fitness on while still indulging in the things that you love once in awhile, then you will have great success and will have made it a lifestyle.

Really, I don't see how this is so hard for people to grasp.

WendyTerry420

Because if you're a grown adult and can't politely manage to turn down a treat you aren't interested in or unaware of how to plan ahead for snacking crisises...then just go ahead and eat it and don't freak out.

How many people ask, How do I say no to an office snack. . . seriously??? Just say no thank you. Do you not have enough self confidence to "Stand up" to the office "snack bully"???

And, in life, there will be snacks, birthday parties/anniversaries, holidays. IF you can't enjoy food AND still make progress. . .the issues go WAY beyond food. Food is just the current symptom of a much larger control/self esteem issue.

My anger may or may not be aggravated by the massive hives I have from a bad reaction to some medication.

SO MUCH THIS!!!!!

WendyTerry420

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.

One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.

Realize: There is no wagon!!

leonaedithlewis

I have found that it helps to continue to faithfully log all the food I am eating even if I am not restricting my diet on vacation. I can eat it so long as I record it. Don't throw out all the habits that have brought you success just because you've decided to eat different foods over vacation.

jwdieter

Also...and it's been said by me and others...it's about your overall dietary lifestyle. Are you not going to eat cake for the rest of your life? If you're stupid enough to make a lifestyle out of eating **** then yeah...nothing good is going to come of that...if you're smart enough to know that you can get your nutrition on and get your fitness on while still indulging in the things that you love once in awhile, then you will have great success and will have made it a lifestyle.

Really, I don't see how this is so hard for people to grasp.

It's very simple. But without constant and mind-boggling misunderstanding of basic principles, these forums would consist of mainly chit chat about dating avatars.

ashleyisgreat

As people have already said, it really depends on the OP and their attitude toward the cake. If they seem to be afraid of it, then a lot of people are going to give responses that speak to that; namely, that one piece of cake really won't kill you. It's about encouraging the OP to try to have a less restrictive (and more manageable) perspective on food. Now, if the OP frames the question such that it is clearly about caloric deficits and a string of bad days, etc, I think people are generally more supportive of the OP's hesitancy to eat the cake. But as someone else said, we aren't here to enable someone's unhealthy fear of food. If the OP is just afraid of "bad" food, obviously that doesn't make any sense to many of us and we won't support that kind of thinking.

Francl27

Because really, one treat one day is not going to kill you. I've had a lot of treats in the 6 months I've been on MFP and they've always fit in my calorie goal.

LorinaLynn

One day with cake and pizza and all that kind of stuff won't hurt anyone's progress, any more than one day of calorie restriction will make you lose weight.

The ONLY way it could derail someone is the psychological aspect. Say they eat some "junk" and feel guilty, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess. Or if they eat some "junk" and see a spike on the scale the next morning, not realizing it's just a fluctuation and water weight, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess.

Keep going forward. Realize there's going to be speed bumps and detours along the way, but they're not roadblocks, and won't send you back to "start."

Unless you let them.

Ramberta

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.

One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.

Realize: There is no wagon!!

...lol seriously though: There IS a wagon: you either live a healthy, reasonable lifestyle, or you don't. Whether that second option is hyper-restrictive dieting or constant overindulgence doesn't matter. You simply have to choose which wagon you want to try to be on, in the end.

KenosFeoh

Anybody who throws a problem out there has to be prepared to accept all opinions, I think. I do try to give them what they asked for, but sometimes it's just impossible - like the member who is already underweight asking how to lose 5-10 more pounds. That's just crazy!

Ramberta

One day with cake and pizza and all that kind of stuff won't hurt anyone's progress, any more than one day of calorie restriction will make you lose weight.

The ONLY way it could derail someone is the psychological aspect. Say they eat some "junk" and feel guilty, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess. Or if they eat some "junk" and see a spike on the scale the next morning, not realizing it's just a fluctuation and water weight, and say, "I already screwed up" and keep eating in excess.

Keep going forward. Realize there's going to be speed bumps and detours along the way, but they're not roadblocks, and won't send you back to "start."

Unless you let them.

I agree 100% with this, and it happens a lot unfortunately. I feel like when people post these "should I eat my birthday cake" threads, they are posting because they are terrified that this exact scenario will happen to them. Whether or not it's likely for the OP in any instance doesn't really matter-- fear is often very irrational, as are expectations when it comes to things like losing weight or getting fit.

The responses, therefore, are never very supportive of that fear. But then again it's forums... so... yeah.

wamydia

I think it's because people are honestly trying to help the poster see that they may be too hard on themselves -- too restrictive. I agree with what a lot of other people have said on here about restricting yourself too much causing you to fail in the long term. I'll take it one step further and say that I'm of the opinion that overly restrictive dieting (or any type) is the primary cause of yo-yo dieting and plays a big role in why we have an ongoing obesity problem in the world today.

Being too restrictive sets a person up for a viscious cycle. You're only human. You're going to want things that are supposedly "bad" for you sometimes. Eventually you're going to cave and have it. But because you have set yourself up for such high expectations, that one little slip can be like the end of the world and trigger that "I hate myself because I eat and I eat because I hate myself" cycle. It can make a person feel like they have epically failed and there's no point in even continuing to try, even if they have been doing very well up to that point. And for people who do make it through to their end goal without faltering, it makes it impossible for them to maintain because it's a rare person who is willing to live the rest of their life on those kinds of restrictions. I think people are just trying to steer others away from this happening to them.

Ramberta

As people have already said, it really depends on the OP and their attitude toward the cake. If they seem to be afraid of it, then a lot of people are going to give responses that speak to that; namely, that one piece of cake really won't kill you. It's about encouraging the OP to try to have a less restrictive (and more manageable) perspective on food. Now, if the OP frames the question such that it is clearly about caloric deficits and a string of bad days, etc, I think people are generally more supportive of the OP's hesitancy to eat the cake. But as someone else said, we aren't here to enable someone's unhealthy fear of food. If the OP is just afraid of "bad" food, obviously that doesn't make any sense to many of us and we won't support that kind of thinking.

But often it's not the fear of the food itself, but the fear that one indulgence will turn into that string of bad days, and that they will snowball out of control. It's not usually a rational fear-- and it is almost an excuse, that one minor "mistake" is somehow a reason to call everything off and give up-- but in some cases it's more legitimate.

I am one of those people who has to limit how much junky food I have at home at any given time, and only buy it in very small quantities, because I am struggling with eating my favorite foods (especially sugary ones) in moderation. It's a lot easier to say "oh yeah have that one piece of cake" when you yourself can only eat one... but perhaps if encouraged to "live it up" and "enjoy" enough, the OP will end up eating four and hating themselves for it. A healthy relationship with food takes a long time to cultivate.

astartig

I am low carb high protein. I plan for one day a month where i eat carbs. Whatever I want with in reason including a dessert. No big deal. It's not a binge day or anything. Just reasonable food probably above my calorie allowance of 1200 by a decent margin but whatever. It keeps me from falling off the wagon the rest of the month. The amount of set back from one day a month is negligible. It might set me back a month (not each occasion setting a month back, just in general) or something to my ultimate goal but when you're talking about changing your habits for a life time that's not a big deal.
That carb day would be set on thanksgiving or my birthday or my families birthday that sort of thing. And yeah, once I am closer to maintenance I'll be making room for occasional treats that fit into my diet somewhat you can't have the exact same number of calories every day anyway or it stagnates the diet. you need a bit under some days and a bit over others.

balance.

Too strict can't maintain
too loose and you fail to loose weight.

Nishi2013

Because super restrictive diets just set people up for failure. You have to learn to eat in a way that you can sustain for the rest of your life. It's better to learn to eat in moderation than to try to completely cut something you love our of your diet.


And one bad meal/dessert/day won't undo someone's hard work.

I totally agree with this post. You have to treat yourself once in a while and it won't undo all your hard work. I allow myself a cheat meal or snack once a week and it hasn't worked against me.

One size does not fit all. For some of us one bite or one day leads to completely falling off the wagon. Cheat days are for Poole who can rebound back after the day is out.

Realize: There is no wagon!!

...lol seriously though: There IS a wagon: you either live a healthy, reasonable lifestyle, or you don't. Whether that second option is hyper-restrictive dieting or constant overindulgence doesn't matter. You simply have to choose which wagon you want to try to be on, in the end.

This... Some of us just choose a different path to get to the goal because we are all different.