Totally sabotaging myself everyday
tammycolbert
Posts: 236 Member
I think, yup today is the day, I am going to eat great. Then I end up with Dunkins for breakfast because I am running late, I cannot resist the chocolate cake because someone left where I work. I do it to myself and then I beat myself up over it. I so need to crack the heck down and just do it. I am starting to feel horrible, dizzy all the time. I just don't understand why I do the things I do. Anyway it was just a vent, sometimes it makes me feel better just to vent even if people are not right in front of me. Thank you.
7
Replies
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I find there is always something going on at work. That is one of the hardest parts, I just made it a habit to say no at work1
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Just make the next best choice.0
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If you are new to this game I must tell you it takes time. But as an adult I think we can all agree that change itself takes time to implement. Do your best, don't beat yourself up, keep making the right choices. You win some you loose some but if you Win more then you Lose, that my friend will make you win the overall war. Good luck and enjoy the journey!10
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Just a suggestion re: breakfast. I can never get up in time for breakfast before work so I eat breakfast at my desk everyday. If you can do that I would seriously recommend it.1
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Ok here is the situation. Weight loss and being healthy is about being in it for the long haul. You had a doughnut ok move on drink a glass of water and then make your next choice one you will be proud of. You had cake great can you make it fit your calories for the day if so do so if not forgive yourself and move on.
You can not change the past you don't know the future you can only control the now make a choice in the now you are going to look back on and be proud of.7 -
Losing weight is hard.
Being overweight is hard.
Pick your hard.20 -
I eat microwave breakfast burritos. 1 minute, 30 seconds. 270 calories and it keeps me feeling pretty good for at least a few hours.2
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I keep stuff I can quickly grab for breakfast and eat in the car. I don't like to eat breakfast, but I need to for meds.
Generally it's some kind of cereal I can eat dry. Not the most healthy, not the worst.0 -
If you just wanted to vent, that's okay. But if you want to do something about it, this is what I would suggest:
Don't eat "great" - I deeply suspect that this means depriving yourself /of food you like, eating boring food, and maybe even eat too little.
Don't demonize foods. Food is good. Some foods are deliberately made to be irresistible, easy to eat/overeat, without nourishing you, and they are everywhere. Our culture is telling us it's okay to eat donuts for breakfast, and that cake in the office is a normal daily thing.
Don't think of yourself as weak or sabotaging yourself. We have survived as a species by eating whenever we can. I am sure you are both hard working and disciplined in other areas (get to work in time, brush your teeth, pay your bills).
Pay attention to how eating this or that makes you feel. Try to distinguish how much of it is mental, and what is physiological reactions.
Plan your meals. In order to follow through and actually eat them, they must satisfy you, and tempt you enough at the time you have planned to eat them, that you'll prefer them to whatever random treat that comes in your way. Eating breakfast at home is an obvious solution. But you can't just say that you're going to eat breakfast from now on. Schedule meals. Buy the necessary groceries. You may even have to schedule grocery shopping and meal planning. But don't think about planning as yet another depressing chore. You can make it fun, and when it's fun and makes you feel better (including lose/maintain weight, eat delicious meals, be more relaxed), you'll want to prioritize this task.
Always remember that cheap treats are ubiquitous, and that there'll soon be another opportunity if you miss one.18 -
you can try and plan your meals. just have oat and milk in the office as a healthy backup if running late or some healthy muesli or'protein bars. when going out check on healthy options for example salad or pasta with a tomato sauce or grilled fish n meat with veggies or salad.0
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thank you all so much, I appreciate it. I do need to change. Thank you all so much I appreciate it more than you know.1
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I get breakfast at Dunkin occasionally. Make the best choice. They have oatmeal, just leave off the sugar and dried fruit. They also have egg whites on wraps and english muffins. Get a banana on the side. Not the best, but not horrible either. Prep and pack breakfast to take with you to eat at work. As for the cake at work, pretend its not there, or bring your own healthy treats.3
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First and absolutely most important: Stop beating yourself up. Shrug your shoulders and move on.
Second: Treat every meal individually. Had Dunkin Donuts for breakfast? Then have a healthy lunch and celebrate that victory. Can't tell you the last time I had a really good day food wise and yet I'm down 50lbs.
3rd: Stop beating yourself up.12 -
Plan ahead your meals is key ...plan to succeed and you will
Make little changes bit by bit and they will stick.
And don't think because you started the day off 'badly' that the rest of it has to follow suit. Take control, log your calories accurately, stick to your daily allowance and you will lose.
You have to want to lose weight badly enough to put in the effort - you'll be surprised at what you can do when you put your mind to it.
All the best.3 -
Praise yourself even for one good decision, even it's a small one!
I used to beat myself up over potato chips (this is my 'chocolate cake', so to say), but then I stopped doing it and just allowed myself to eat them, within my calorie count. One small portion is better than restricting totally. You satisfy your demons and don't overdo.
You can do it!2 -
They do pizza and all kinds of stuff at work as appreciation for our hard work. But, I already have lunch made. I also make enough breakfast (oats that I mix with peanut butter and chocolate I cut into bars for ease) for my work week. I don't have to stress about being short on time because I set myself up for success with some easy meal prep the day before my work week.
Losing weight is about having enough respect for yourself that you want to make a change. That means approaching it with a clear head and not berating yourself when you slip. Life is full of free food in the break room and dinners out with friends. There are gonna be times when you can't weigh everything out. Log, enjoy, and look at the next day as an opportunity to go again.2 -
I used to beat myself up mentally for 'slip ups'. I'd feel so defeated, I'd binge later on in the day because, hey, why not? I already 'blew it' for the day.
Then I got into weight lifting. What a game changer. Instead of focusing on eating as little as possible and what I weighed on the scale, I now think in terms of fueling my body for my next training session and eating to aid in recovery. I gave up on trying to maintain a pristine, low-calorie diet. Seriously, that *kitten* ain't realistic for the long-term. I literally eat twice the calories as before and am still losing weight (and, more importantly, inches). I cannot begin to tell you how liberating that is. I really believe weight lifting saved me from more years of yo-yo dieting torture.
Life is stressful enough without having to chastise ourselves over a donut (or two ) for breakfast. Eat the donut, eat the cake, balance it out with high-protein, nutritious foods, make sure you're under your TDEE for the long haul (some weeks will be better than others--that's perfectly fine), and it'll all be good.3 -
tammyturcotte wrote: »I think, yup today is the day, I am going to eat great. Then I end up with Dunkins for breakfast because I am running late
OK... and? You adjust your plans for the rest of the day to compensate. And if it's a pattern, and if you don't want to adjust your plans to have donuts for breakfast, you figure out how to stop ending up in the situation that makes it happen. This is why I (like others in this thread) eat breakfast at work.I cannot resist the chocolate cake because someone left where I work
Yes, yes you can. You're choosing not to.
You can have a small piece of cake, log it, and adjust your plans for the rest of the day. Or you can decide that the adjustment you'd have to make is too great, and it's not worth it. Either way you stay within your eating plan and feel good at the end of the day.
It sounds like what you're actually doing is eating the cake, not making any adjustment for it, and then feeling awful. Why are you doing that to yourself?5 -
Both of the quoted.
Weight loss is a calories game. Log all the food you eat. One donut won't derail your progress if you include it in your calories. Think of calories as money.snickerscharlie wrote: »Losing weight is hard.
Being overweight is hard.
Pick your hard.kommodevaran wrote: »If you just wanted to vent, that's okay. But if you want to do something about it, this is what I would suggest:
Don't eat "great" - I deeply suspect that this means depriving yourself /of food you like, eating boring food, and maybe even eat too little.
Don't demonize foods. Food is good. Some foods are deliberately made to be irresistible, easy to eat/overeat, without nourishing you, and they are everywhere. Our culture is telling us it's okay to eat donuts for breakfast, and that cake in the office is a normal daily thing.
Don't think of yourself as weak or sabotaging yourself. We have survived as a species by eating whenever we can. I am sure you are both hard working and disciplined in other areas (get to work in time, brush your teeth, pay your bills).
Pay attention to how eating this or that makes you feel. Try to distinguish how much of it is mental, and what is physiological reactions.
Plan your meals. In order to follow through and actually eat them, they must satisfy you, and tempt you enough at the time you have planned to eat them, that you'll prefer them to whatever random treat that comes in your way. Eating breakfast at home is an obvious solution. But you can't just say that you're going to eat breakfast from now on. Schedule meals. Buy the necessary groceries. You may even have to schedule grocery shopping and meal planning. But don't think about planning as yet another depressing chore. You can make it fun, and when it's fun and makes you feel better (including lose/maintain weight, eat delicious meals, be more relaxed), you'll want to prioritize this task.
Always remember that cheap treats are ubiquitous, and that there'll soon be another opportunity if you miss one.
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Keep a couple of 'emergency' healthy snacks at your desk (a couple of pieces of fruit, some raw almonds, etc.). Sometimes you just gotta have cake, but it will be much easier to make good choices if you actually have a good choice to make.0
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I have a sweet tooth too. What works for me is planning for one treat a day, and then choosing it consciously. This makes me say no to some treats (office or elsewhere) and yes to the one I really like. Say 200 extra calories. Budget that into the day. What works for me is logging all my meals beforehand and then if I have a treat, add a walk - or a swim - and then get rid of the junk calories that way. And I say no to the second offered treat.
For me eating sweet fruit helps - mango, a bunch of grapes or pineapple. Can make this even better by adding a protein to it: mango + plain Greek yogurt; grapes + cheese; pineapple + cottage cheese. So this is my second (non junk) sweet treat. This way I don't feel deprived and I get to indulge in moderation.2 -
It's been said enough, but it's worth saying again.
If breakfast is where you struggle the most, plan it out in advance. Have snack bars, single serve nut pouches, etc. At your desk.. at your home. in your car if necessary. It's Friday, Take the weekend to plan/strategize breakfast for next week. If you must.... Pre log it all.
If convenience is the battle then make it more convenient to eat what you've planned than to sabotage.1 -
I plan my entire food day in advance. Breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, dessert. I log it all into MFP before I eat breakfast. I pack my breakfast, lunch and snack and take them to work every day.
If someone brings in doughnuts (like they did this morning), I can look at my already completed food diary and decide if I want to make that treat fit in my day or not. Sometimes I do (like today), and sometimes I don't.3 -
vivelajackie wrote: »They do pizza and all kinds of stuff at work as appreciation for our hard work. But, I already have lunch made. I also make enough breakfast (oats that I mix with peanut butter and chocolate I cut into bars for ease) for my work week. I don't have to stress about being short on time because I set myself up for success with some easy meal prep the day before my work week.
Losing weight is about having enough respect for yourself that you want to make a change. That means approaching it with a clear head and not berating yourself when you slip. Life is full of free food in the break room and dinners out with friends. There are gonna be times when you can't weigh everything out. Log, enjoy, and look at the next day as an opportunity to go again.
Can't agree with this more! WELL SAID! I pack my lunch including 1-2 low calorie healthy snacks for my work day. By reminding myself only to eat what I brought, and checking my daily calorie count on MFP before making a decision about what to eat, I have been able to avoid the temptations (so far) that are also in my office on basically a daily basis, lol. I love my coworkers but honestly I remind myself that most of them are overweight and some are morbidly obese, and if I follow their lead and participate in their disordered eating, I will never achieve my fitness goals.
That said, as many others have pointed out, you really need to adjust your mindset. I eat several treat items a week, genuine junk food like beer, wine, pizza, ice cream, all the good stuff. The thing is that I plan for them and adjust my exercise and other caloric intake so they don't destroy the success I made otherwise. You have to ask yourself what you are willing to do LONG TERM to lose the weight and to keep it off. For me, I know I cannot forsake pizza and beer the rest of my life. But can I forsake it during the work week? Can I forsake having a 2nd or 3rd helping? Sure I can, as long as I remind myself of why I am doing it.
For me, getting my mind where it needs to be to lose and keep weight off long term has been the best weight loss strategy I have implemented. When you have motivation, determination, and consistency, you can do it. You will still have hard times, but at least for me, the hard times are getting fewer and fewer. Mind over matter. Mind over unhelpful office junk food!0 -
You have to come up with tactics that fit your life. If you know that you aren't the type of person who wakes up to make breakfast, then begin making it the night before (Pinterest has tons of make-ahead breakfast ideas) or pull up the Dunkin Donuts nutritional information online and find choices that will fit into your calorie goals (I see they have at least one sandwich that is 330 calories, something that will fit into just about any calorie goal for breakfast). Stop using "I have to stop at Dunkin Donuts" as an excuse to blow your calorie goal for the day.
My weight loss plans always failed when I tried to use them to become a different type of person. Maybe you will never be the type of person who wakes up early to make breakfast. That's okay. You can still lose weight. Figure out what weigh loss looks like for the person you actually are, not the person you wish you were.4 -
The people I work with like to eat, and I mean really like to munch away. I've had to resist, Reese peanut butter cups, cake, homemade cinnamon rolls and biscuits all brought in on separate days this week. So I get it temptation was there all week and I've resisted every single one as I really want to just lose those last few pounds that have eluded me through temptations at work and at home that I have indulged in over the last 6 months or so. Start with telling yourself no just the once and it will be easier the next time, carry on. Right now I'm being strict with myself later I may see if I can fit something in but that is the key, check if you can fit it in your day first before you put it in your mouth. Easiest way to do that as others suggested is to pre-log your day.
Try again tomorrow you will get it eventually.0 -
kdavid1987 wrote: »For me, getting my mind where it needs to be to lose and keep weight off long term has been the best weight loss strategy I have implemented.
Quoted for truth.
I spent the first two weeks of my new regime analysing my attitude to food and hunger and pretty much rewriting them. It was hard, and I still have to pick myself up on moments where I backslide. But without that, I would have got nowhere.1 -
I had a donut with breakfast. Take a look at last Sat for me. It's not great but it's getting me there. Down 35lbs and still have a lot to go but I'm doing it. It's not all or nothing which was the hardest thing for me to get.
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just fit the cake // dunkin donut into your calories. have a healthy lunch and dinner1
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There are a few days in the past 18 months that ate a half dozen donuts, but I've still lost 75 pounds -- mostly because it was a few days.
On the other 500+ days, I planned,packed and logged all my meals the evening before.
A few specific suggestions for 1 minute breakfasts include overnight oats (I add riced cauliflower for bulk) or a Special K breakfast sandwich. I de-thaw them overnight in the freezer, 60 seconds in microwave. Add a protein shake to either and it's a good, filling meal.0
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