Fat shaming???

MSam1205

Is it still acceptable to make overweight people the subject of jokes? Do we laugh at those jokes to hide the pain inside? It is not okay anymore to use ethnic slurs, racial or ethnic jokes, jokes about tall people or little people, jokes about guns, or bombs or terrorism is not okay either. but a persons weight? Yeah go ahead cuz fat people don't have feelings.... We see it in Scripted TV shows and on reality shows. I hear it all the time on the radio talk shows. I've lost about 1/2 a person, still have a ways to go, but I will never feel skinny,... Hopefully healthy, but never skinny because all those comments, jokes, etc are stored away in a part of my brain and they still pop up every now and then to remind me what I was and where I came from. This article brought some of that back for me. I sometimes wish every fat joke teller could spend a week in one of those "fat suits" Particularly some of the late night hosts...

Interesting reading if this topic hit a nerve... I don't know anyone who ever lost weight because they wew yelled at or shamed into it!

http://t.nbcnews.com/health/fat-shaming-actually-increases-risk-becoming-or-staying-obese-new-8C10751491?ocid=msnhp&pos=5

nomeejerome

This might not end well....

minijuggernaut

Can we all just read the fat-wank in the comments here and pretend it was all of us talking about it and then move on to a new topic?

http://jezebel.com/5985524/youre-lazy-and-hate-the-gym-because-god-and-science-made-you-that-way

nainai0585

So, if a fat person makes fun of THEMSELVES and how they look I'm not allowed to laugh right along with them ? How about the Asian who calls himself/herself a twinkie? Can I no longer call myself a mutt as a joke? What about my sister with the acquired brain injury who makes the tell tail sign with her hand and the sound of a disabled person, while she is making fun of HERSELF? My mom frequently lifts her rolls of fat and laughs about how long they jiggle, is it acceptable for me to laugh with her? How about my father who is German, born in Germany, and arrived in Canada on a boat, and laughs when he makes jokes about being fresh off the boat.....is this acceptable?

Man, if we can't laugh at ourselves and those we love who are laughing at themselves, then I'm not too sure what is worth laughing at or about anymore.

CooperSprings

Learning to laugh at yourself and the world is stress relieving.
Being in the moment with the joke-ster and being demeaned is something else entirely.
There is a line of respect that shouldn't be crossed when you're talking about people, in general.

I_Will_End_You

I joke about everything. I'm an equal opportunity offender.

usmcmp

Another topic on this today.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1056752-fat-shaming

Fat people aren't the only ones who get it. I get told several times a week I need to eat and I need to stop working out because my muscles are gross. I thank them for their opinion and move on with my life.

weightlossdiva1219

So, if a fat person makes fun of THEMSELVES and how they look I'm not allowed to laugh right along with them ? How about the Asian who calls himself/herself a twinkie? Can I no longer call myself a mutt as a joke? What about my sister with the acquired brain injury who makes the tell tail sign with her hand and the sound of a disabled person, while she is making fun of HERSELF? My mom frequently lifts her rolls of fat and laughs about how long they jiggle, is it acceptable for me to laugh with her? How about my father who is German, born in Germany, and arrived in Canada on a boat, and laughs when he makes jokes about being fresh off the boat.....is this acceptable?

Man, if we can't laugh at ourselves and those we love who are laughing at themselves, then I'm not too sure what is worth laughing at or about anymore.

This is a different issue. My boyfriend is Jewish. He makes fun of Jews all the time, but I'm not Jewish and when I do it it's disrespectful. It's kinda ettiquette. Common sense dude.

anaconda469

Well to each their own. If someone is being made fun of because they are fat, they should take a good look at themselves and use it as motivation to start doing something about it. If someone is morbidly obese, take it as a hint that something must be done, if for their health than anything else.

lithezebra

I can't think of anyone I know who is overweight who wants to laugh along with jokes about being fat. I also don't know any slender people who want to be told they should eat more, called "stick insects," or asked if they would ever consider having breast implants.

VioletNightshade

When people have not gone through something, it's sometimes difficult for them to be sensitive to it and approach it with any degree of comprehension. (I won't address the racial / ethnic slur bit and why it doesn't compare to weight because that's kind of been beaten to death in a thread earlier today)

Also, some people are over sensitive, and it isn't only overweight people who get teased and bullied. Even in scripted shows, you'll sometimes see people (quite often guys who aren't athletic.. because I suppose athletic is supposed to be 'better' or something) getting the snot beat out of them for being skinny. It comes in all shapes and sizes. People, especially kids, are mean. Some people get a high off of creating and maintaining the fear, self loathing and dread that they see in their victims.

There's no one motivation for bullying. It's as diverse as the methods in which it's carried out.

None of us is perfect, and none has any right to put others down, regardless of why. It's not common that I will quote the Bible, but it had a point when it said "he that is without sin among you, let him first throw a stone," and "first remove the beam from your own eye, and then you will see clearly enough to remove the speck from your brother's eye."



One thing I HAVE noticed is that the way fat shamers in films are portrayed today has changed soooooooooo much in recent years. Before, sometimes it was kind of glorified at times. Now, the kids who are shown fat shaming are shown as being awful, malicious and cruel. I think this is a constructive change.

Something needs to be done about malicious teasing in general. I'm known to tease my friends relentlessly, but they know I'm joking and that I actually care a great deal about them and would NEVER do anything to hurt them on purpose. I often go out of my way to make sure they're taken care of and treated well, and go into 'Mama lion here... excuse me, but you did NOT just get too close to my cub. TELL me I did not see you getting too close to my cub. I will lose my s*** and put you in the ground so hard seismologists will think there has been an earthquake in the area if I see you here again, now you'd better run away quick before I change my mind and decide to chase you.' mode if someone is nasty towards someone I care about. If you know someone well and you have rapport with them, it's one thing to make a joke here and there, knowing it'll get a laugh out of them, but to attempt to make someone else feel worthless is not. Being fat is a lifestyle choice, yes, and one which is unhealthy, sure, and expensive, undoubtedly (if not for the individual, then quite often for their health care provider / the economy / hospital, should they require care), but the way to get someone to adopt healthier habits is not by making them feel like nothing. It's far easier to encourage someone to get the weight off if you come from a place of love and support.

Iron_Lotus

This might not end well....

Might? lol More like won't

nainai0585

So, if a fat person makes fun of THEMSELVES and how they look I'm not allowed to laugh right along with them ? How about the Asian who calls himself/herself a twinkie? Can I no longer call myself a mutt as a joke? What about my sister with the acquired brain injury who makes the tell tail sign with her hand and the sound of a disabled person, while she is making fun of HERSELF? My mom frequently lifts her rolls of fat and laughs about how long they jiggle, is it acceptable for me to laugh with her? How about my father who is German, born in Germany, and arrived in Canada on a boat, and laughs when he makes jokes about being fresh off the boat.....is this acceptable?

Man, if we can't laugh at ourselves and those we love who are laughing at themselves, then I'm not too sure what is worth laughing at or about anymore.

This is a different issue. My boyfriend is Jewish. He makes fun of Jews all the time, but I'm not Jewish and when I do it it's disrespectful. It's kinda ettiquette. Common sense dude.

So your telling me that you don't have a secure enough relationship with your significant other to laugh at him or make fun of the fact that he's Jewish? Wow, that's gotta suck. I make fun of my husband all the time b/c he has tiny ears or the fact that he's the product of some infidelity by his mom (completely not true of course, but a fun joke all the same). And he laughs at me calling me a mutt, or that I have a "shelf" on my abdomin for oue kids to sit on, etc etc. If you can't laugh and make fun of each other in ANY aspect and still love each other and not be hurt, then man does that relationship kinda suck the fun out of the air.

When I was thin I cracked jokes about fat people and when I was fat I cracked jokes about fat people. Who cares. If YOUR life is so devistated by a person who you don't even know who makes fun of you, then you need help. Why care about what a non consequential passerby thinks of you? You'll most likely never see them again, or interact with them again. Shouldn't the ONLY comments that matter are from those who you love and trust?

So my advice is to get away from the "poor me" and "I'm a victim" mind set and start realizing that its only YOU who's putting yourself down b/c your believing what some nameless stranger thinks or says. Your making yourself the victim, NOT the joker. Like another commentor stated earlier, they are an equal opportunistic joker as are A LOT of other jokesters. They don't care that your fat; have long or short hair; are thin; are muscler; etc. They just cracked a joke. Its up to YOU on how you respond.

granitendirt

No, I don't make fun of people's body shapes/weights. I have some overweight friends who poke fun at their own weights, but I generally feel awkward and don't join in. Maybe they want someone to rib them right back, maybe they don't. I don't know. I don't like it when people make comments about my own body weight, so I don't do it to others.

My boyfriend is half-Mexican. I make fun of him for not liking spicy food (seriously... even some spaghetti sauces are too potent for him). I have German heritage as well as blond hair and blue eyes, so he makes various jokes about me regarding eugenics.

Nothing's necessarily off limits; it's all about scoping out a situation and knowing the people you're joking with. It's called perception.

Contrarian

I thought fat people were jolly.

Hazevamp

I used to be teased and made fun of because of my weight. I would never laugh along with someone actively seeking to hurt me and dehumanize me. However, I do know harmless jokes when I see it and laugh cause well, it's funny. being able to laugh at yourself is sometimes the best medicine when it isn't done to hurt you. Before I couldn't tell the difference but now I do. My entire family is trying to lose weight and it has been a fun experience for us cause we laugh about the things we are going through and I have a few embarrassing stories to tell about my big butt getting me into trouble and now I have whole new experiences to talk about with this little weight loss journey. The only thing that annoys me are people who think fat shaming helps people lose weight. it never has and never will.

nainai0585

I thought fat people were jolly.

I guess we need to take a second look at Santa then. He must be deeply depressed.

Nikoruo

I'd say the safe bet is to know a person before you laugh along with them. If they are people like me who consistently make jokes about my weight but it's because i know it's a fact I don't get bothered if you laugh at my joke too since... it is a fact. The only time it hurts is if i'm like "Oh man i'm as big as a whale!" and they laugh... but i guess it also depends on the person laughing, whether i know that they like me despite my weight. I've lived a long time with a fat shaming father who thought that if he picked on it enough i'd become self consious and change it. Well half of his expectations worked... i did get self consious for a while and was afraid (and still am) that people are looking at me in disgust... and it didn't make me want to lose the weight at all. It actually set me down a road of self hate and i got bigger because i gave in to the fact that i was a 'fatty' and i figured 'why change what i am'. At my lowest i felt like i should just off myself. However that wasn't just because one person was calling me names, it was because many people did and so did strangers. I lost partners (presumably) because of this too. However i digress, you must know the individual before you laugh at a joke they make about themself or before you make that joke. Make sure they know you care about them reguardless!

Laces_0ut

I like the Tosh.0 approach. Make fun of everyone!

BurningAway

I just want to say "in before the lock."

Mslmesq

It is never acceptable. I should add, shaming anyone over their body (fat, thin, handicapped, other issues) is never ok. It also ALWAYS says more about the person doing it then who they are doing it to. It is a trigger for them that they have to judge anyone else for their body. Problem is, it usually still hurts the person they are doing it to. :-(

The TRUTH is we ALL have perfect bodies. That is until the day we die. Then, they are not so good anymore. I will be happy with the gift of my body until that day. When it looks great and when it doesn't. Either way, it allows me to breathe and move around. And THAT is what matters.

Ang108

Preface: I am five feet tall.

A few weeks ago I went to the 80th birthday of someone. It was a big party and a bit later in the evening a very tall and quite overweight ( maybe 175kilos/more than 350 pounds ) man asked me " how is the air down there ". I answered " it stinks of fat people ". The moment I said it I felt bad, but also must confess that I am sick & tired of the short people and dwarf jokes and because of that felt a certain satisfaction in regard to my answer. Also, and that is just my personal opinion, I am 65 and find that even though someone feels like saying something , even though it is never funny, no matter what they say, they should show a bit of respect for an older woman.
I wonder, am I guilty of fat shaming ? Should I have taken the high road ? I am not American and sometimes comments that have to do with what is PC confuse me some. But I also don't want to use the excuse that I live in a different culture and therefore my remarks ( and with that my attitude ) are OK.

downsizinghoss

I thought fat people were jolly.

I guess we need to take a second look at Santa then. He must be deeply depressed.

nope. He has the naughty girl list. He is really jolly.

Rage_Phish

So, if a fat person makes fun of THEMSELVES and how they look I'm not allowed to laugh right along with them ? How about the Asian who calls himself/herself a twinkie? Can I no longer call myself a mutt as a joke? What about my sister with the acquired brain injury who makes the tell tail sign with her hand and the sound of a disabled person, while she is making fun of HERSELF? My mom frequently lifts her rolls of fat and laughs about how long they jiggle, is it acceptable for me to laugh with her? How about my father who is German, born in Germany, and arrived in Canada on a boat, and laughs when he makes jokes about being fresh off the boat.....is this acceptable?

Man, if we can't laugh at ourselves and those we love who are laughing at themselves, then I'm not too sure what is worth laughing at or about anymore.

This is a different issue. My boyfriend is Jewish. He makes fun of Jews all the time, but I'm not Jewish and when I do it it's disrespectful. It's kinda ettiquette. Common sense dude.

So your telling me that you don't have a secure enough relationship with your significant other to laugh at him or make fun of the fact that he's Jewish? Wow, that's gotta suck. I make fun of my husband all the time b/c he has tiny ears or the fact that he's the product of some infidelity by his mom (completely not true of course, but a fun joke all the same). And he laughs at me calling me a mutt, or that I have a "shelf" on my abdomin for oue kids to sit on, etc etc. If you can't laugh and make fun of each other in ANY aspect and still love each other and not be hurt, then man does that relationship kinda suck the fun out of the air.

When I was thin I cracked jokes about fat people and when I was fat I cracked jokes about fat people. Who cares. If YOUR life is so devistated by a person who you don't even know who makes fun of you, then you need help. Why care about what a non consequential passerby thinks of you? You'll most likely never see them again, or interact with them again. Shouldn't the ONLY comments that matter are from those who you love and trust?

So my advice is to get away from the "poor me" and "I'm a victim" mind set and start realizing that its only YOU who's putting yourself down b/c your believing what some nameless stranger thinks or says. Your making yourself the victim, NOT the joker. Like another commentor stated earlier, they are an equal opportunistic joker as are A LOT of other jokesters. They don't care that your fat; have long or short hair; are thin; are muscler; etc. They just cracked a joke. Its up to YOU on how you respond.

I like your style

SoDamnHungry

I like the Tosh.0 approach. Make fun of everyone!

And do it naked!

Contrarian

I thought fat people were jolly.

I guess we need to take a second look at Santa then. He must be deeply depressed.

Maybe he only gives us presents so we will finally accept him. This puts a different spin on Christmas, doesn't it? I mean, I don't want to use the word "ruined", but...well...you know.

nainai0585

I thought fat people were jolly.

I guess we need to take a second look at Santa then. He must be deeply depressed.

nope. He has the naughty girl list. He is really jolly.

I'll make sure I'm EXTRA naughty this year. I want to see how "jolly" he REALLY is.

dakotababy

I don't usually recommend this...but you need a j! Seriously...or a hug or something.

nainai0585

I don't usually recommend this...but you need a j! Seriously...or a hug or something.

J? Like mary j? B/c I've got some of those to pass around.......Mmmmmm, with some chips, and ice cream, and chocolate bars, OOO, and what about some fast food together?! This way we can ALL get together and makes fat jokes about each other, while also shoving our faces with DELICIOUS garbage, and have a real good time

Panda_1999

Thanks to the OP for this article.
Attacking anyone or any given type hurts someone, even when that attack is hidden in humor. Humor is often used to excuse ideas or behavior would be otherwise unacceptable. Maybe that is why so many people here couldn't wait to pile on the jokes instead of actually discussing how much harm comes from fat shaming.

nomeejerome

This might not end well....

Might? lol More like won't

Yeah. You are right. I was still in a good mood from moon moon.