Long time maintainers - when did your brain catch up?

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  • CaliMomTeach
    CaliMomTeach Posts: 745 Member
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    I haven't been maintaining for any amount of time (in fact regained a few pounds which I'm now trying to lose), but I am in constant denial of what size I really am to the point of arguing with a friend shopping with me, saying "I am NOT a small" or "I am not a size 4." I just went shopping this past week a few times, and am still feeling very weird that almost all of the tops I bought were smalls (2 were XS due to loose style), one long skirt was an XS, and today I tried on two pairs of size 4 jeans that fit me perfectly. I started at 193 and a size 14 last July. I have said numerous times "I am not that size" but various brands of clothing say differently. When I look in the mirror, I do not see a person this small at all. I still see fat. But once in a while I see a woman who looks thin and great and realize that it is actually me in a reflection or mirror somewhere. I have friends at a similar size and still see them as much smaller than me. I am waiting for my brain to catch up as well.
  • timtam163
    timtam163 Posts: 500 Member
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    I feel like I experienced the opposite thing: I was a skinny kid, so when I got to my heaviest weight in college I was in super denial about how I looked. I still saw the skinny girl inside. Though now I'm in denial again. Maybe the person we were as a kid/young adult is the person we will always expect to see.

    I do however feel more intense feelings of being a "fraud"; like if people get to know me as thin they won't know me at my worst, and therefore won't know "all" of me. Also fear of looking in the mirror and suddenly seeing the me that was 6 sizes bigger.

    But no... I don't know how long it takes to get used to being a certain size.

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