What is/was your favorite thing about NOT having kids?
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Be careful what you wish for. All my kids are grown up. No matter how much time you spend with them as they grow up, it's not enough.7
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So glad my kids are grown. Instead of taking one vacation a year with the kids now my husband and I can take 3 - 4 vacations a year without them!!0
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I don't have kids, one thing I notice is that a lot of parents seem to be slaves to their children.
I think my favourite thing about not having kids is all my "me" time. And quiet, and not having the responsibility.2 -
lisawolfinger wrote: »I have a child with disabilities and one not...love them to death, would do anything for them. I never have the luxury of anticipating the day when I am an empty nester....and I think, over all, that may be the one thing I wish I could change. No matter how strong your love and devotion...sometimes, your just tired.
I got a lot of respect for you on that. I am on the fence with having kids and in the back of my mind having a child with disabilities is there, My husbands older 47 and I'm 34 (not super old I know but the risks still go up) but I think to myself If I had a kid with something like that I just am not the kind of person who could handle it ( I know people will say you learn to but I'll be honest her and say NO I don't want to handle it), so the other part of my mind says if you're not willing to handle it on the off chance, then you shouldn't have kids....and that's where I am at now.5 -
I miss being able to be more impulsive without consequences..
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Mostly coke and hookers. But getting those back isn't worth the skill I've acquired at being able to throw a stuffed animal and hit a kid at pretty solid distances.6
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My son moved out when he was 18. He bought his house when he was 20. He's now 25 and I just recently moved out on my own so we each have complete freedom. He was a great kid and a lot of fun but it's even better now that he's maturing and understanding adult life. We have a good relationship but with entirely separate lives. We talk every day and see each other regularly, but my life doesn't revolve around his and I made sure it was that way. It's better for both of us.2
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LeGaCyGiAnT91 wrote: »cwolfman13 wrote: »LeGaCyGiAnT91 wrote: »I can't honestly think of anything. My kid made me a better person, not the other way around
My kids made me a better person too...that doesn't mean there aren't certain things I miss pre-kid. Missing something pre-kid doesn't mean having kids made you a worse person...it means there were certain things that you could do or more readily and easily do before having kids.
I understand that, but I can do anything I want now that I used to do before. I guess having my own garage would be one... way too much kid stuff packed everywhere... in every room...
I would think that highly unlikely. Life without kids provides for way more "freedom" and much less responsibility. Just as an example, if my wife is out of town for work, I can't just get up in the morning and go for a ride or hit the gym...I have to be there because they are young...they need to get ready for school...I have to take them to school...I have to pick them up later and get them dinner and do homework and I can't swap out a morning ride for an evening ride because I have to be there.
Not that it's a bad thing...but I can acknowledge that I had a lot more freedom and could be far more spontanious and impulsive before I had kids.2 -
Ironandwine69 wrote: »Taking a shower without anybody knocking at the door. Every.single.time. To ask something that is not even important.
Honestly, it would never have occurred to me to disturb my parents when they were in the bathroom. I don't remember if they told me not to or if I figured it out myself, but whatever I wanted could wait until they came out. I was a pretty independent little cuss anyway.
I'm child-free and lovin' it, and the S.S. Reproduction sailed a long time ago so I won't be changing my mind. I especially love spur-of-the-moment weekend getaways to places that interest ME, and not places that will appeal to a child (or bore the heck out of it so it whines the whole time).1 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Be careful what you wish for. All my kids are grown up. No matter how much time you spend with them as they grow up, it's not enough.
This why I would say the one thing I miss is the ability to just sit down and watch a grown up show or play a video game or... just sit down. I do not do those things now because I know that before I know it they won't need or want me around. Until then I am going to enjoy every moment I can with them.0 -
enyagoboom wrote: »I value sleep, solitude, and being able to do my own thing when I want. While I love children generally, I am really REALLY okay being childless by choice and being able to put me first 90% of the time.
THIS, all of this. I love my little niece, but I love even more that I'm not the one having to raise her. I value my independence, my ability to do whatever TF I want when I want, and not having to plan about a kid. I've just never had that maternal drive other people have.0 -
I wish I could just have time alone without having to stay up until 2AM to have a moment of peace & quiet or time to myself. One or both of mine are at my side 15+ hours a day, 7 days a week.0
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I am a 62 y/o female. I never wanted kids, never had them by choice, NEVER regretted it. Probably because I grew up in a household where I was the oldest of seven children and felt like I did my time as a "mom". I was fortunate to fall in love with and marry a man who did not want them either. We have long since been divorced, but to answer your question, I loved having the freedom: to travel, relocate on a whim, start a business, take classes, and generally - just have lots of adventures. I have a ton of nieces and nephews, and some of them now have children - and I have found that to be enough for me....3
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I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!2
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Being able to watch football instead of PJ Masks on Disney lol0
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@LittleHearseDriver wrote: »Not having to plan dinner around picky eaters.
At Christmas I don't have to buy the latest expensive toy.
Wait, you've been married before so you know that one doesn't really work.0 -
MatthewRuch wrote: »I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!
On behalf of all parents everywhere, I’d like to say stop bringing my kids crap, they don’t appreciate it and they’re already spoiled as it is.
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It would be cool to not have to hide the good snacks from the kids.0
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My son moved out when he was 18. He bought his house when he was 20. He's now 25 and I just recently moved out on my own so we each have complete freedom. He was a great kid and a lot of fun but it's even better now that he's maturing and understanding adult life. We have a good relationship but with entirely separate lives. We talk every day and see each other regularly, but my life doesn't revolve around his and I made sure it was that way. It's better for both of us.
This! My kids are finally adult age, and I have all the things back everyone misses when they have kids, only I have a kid. And we have a great relationship, but his life is his and mine is back to mine.
It's only when you screw up that they live in your basement until they are 35. Really, you're only in it for 18 years. 16 if you teach them how to run their own lives, then you're just providing a roof and some advice from time to time.1 -
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TeacupsAndToning wrote: »I have a dog who is MY SON but it's nice that my husband and I can leave our six year old baby at home for 8 hours and not have the police called on us
Wait till that dog gets elected mayor of your town. Those rules will change real fast.2 -
caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!
On behalf of all parents everywhere, I’d like to say stop bringing my kids crap, they don’t appreciate it and they’re already spoiled as it is.
Hmm they told me they would like a drum set and a Didgeridoo from my next trip to australia!2 -
MatthewRuch wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!
On behalf of all parents everywhere, I’d like to say stop bringing my kids crap, they don’t appreciate it and they’re already spoiled as it is.
Hmm they told me they would like a drum set and a Didgeridoo from my next trip to australia!
If you like them so much, I’ll just send them with you. The younger one will make you want to trade her straight up for a kit kat, and tbh I’m okay if you come home with only one of them.1 -
caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!
On behalf of all parents everywhere, I’d like to say stop bringing my kids crap, they don’t appreciate it and they’re already spoiled as it is.
Hmm they told me they would like a drum set and a Didgeridoo from my next trip to australia!
If you like them so much, I’ll just send them with you. The younger one will make you want to trade her straight up for a kit kat, and tbh I’m okay if you come home with only one of them.
You better try and get half of that kit kat too...smh, leaving money/food on the table like that.1 -
Caporegiem wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »MatthewRuch wrote: »I have made it to 38 with no kids, never wanted them, but live vicariously because I get to be the cool uncle who travels the world (for free, work for an airline) and always bring back cool stuff!
On behalf of all parents everywhere, I’d like to say stop bringing my kids crap, they don’t appreciate it and they’re already spoiled as it is.
Hmm they told me they would like a drum set and a Didgeridoo from my next trip to australia!
If you like them so much, I’ll just send them with you. The younger one will make you want to trade her straight up for a kit kat, and tbh I’m okay if you come home with only one of them.
You better try and get half of that kit kat too...smh, leaving money/food on the table like that.
Desperate times0 -
Seeing my niece and nephew simultaneously makes me want kids and not want kids. They are so cute and funny but the fits, throwing food in restaurants, having to leave everything early bc they need a nap, the look on my sister's and her man's face says maybe they aren't so great. I remember babysitting my niece on the regular when she was a toddler and she would sit outside the bathroom door crying and putting her hand under the door like a cat and I'm sorry, but a kid staring at me when I'm in there is a no. I've been with her in public by myself while she threw a fit and having everyone look at me like I'm a bad parent. hmmm I've had a small taste of that life. But even still, baby fever hits from time to time. When I get to see them I'm stuck to them like glue.0
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I don't have children by choice.
Although I love other peoples kids, my fear is that I would *kitten* them up royally as they don't quite get sarcasm until they are much older. The little ones are smarter than you give them credit for and the trauma of my jokes and dry humor would result in years of therapy for them, on my dime. I do hand it to everyone that has them though...tough job!!1
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