What to do when you just can’t stop.

hiyomi
hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
edited November 22 in Health and Weight Loss
Hi everyone. So I’ve been on a weight loss journey for over 5 years now. Bouncing up and down between weight loss and gain. This time around, I’m the heaviest I’ve ever weighed, gaining 25 lbs in one year. I tried about twice this year to lose weight, seeing 3-5 lb losses and then basically a plateau/stall despite what I did. I’ve lost over 30 lbs before, so it’s not like I don’t know how to lose weight. After those failed attempts earlier this year, I’m finding it really hard to try at all. I keep saying I’m going to, and I always have, but this time I’m just not...I’ve been making small good choices I guess you could say, I even lost about 3 lbs and I haven’t gained weight in the last few months. But I can’t get that motivation to lose weight after seeing those last two failed attempts. I’ve gone through plateus before, gotten over them, but that was after i lost 15-20 lbs. I was seeing plateus after 2-4 lbs of weight loss, eating at 1600 calories a day and exercising, mind you, I weight just about 300 lbs. I tried upping my calories, I tried lowering them, none of which worked. Any tips or motivation or words, explanations would be greatly appreciated. I’ve gone so far as shopping for healthy foods, enrolling in gym membership, buying new workout clothes, and then not cooking anything and not going to the gym at all.

Replies

  • hiyomi
    hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
    phwdjones wrote: »
    Are you measuring your foods / calorie intake correctly? Maybe you're underestimating how many cals you're actually taking in.

    Yep, the whole thing, and no, I’m not lying to myself about my caloric intake, I’ve lost weight many times before. My problem was never losing weight, it was keeping it off, as I would always stop my good habits and slowly gain it back. This time though, my problem is actually losing weight. I’ve been calorie counting off and on for years, have a food scale and am very aware of the calories I consume
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    How long was it before you determined you were in a plateau?
  • hiyomi
    hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
    janejellyroll wrote: »
    How long was it before you determined you were in a plateau?

    The first time about a month and half (which is semi short I know) and the second time was about 3 months. And I mean no movement at all in the scale, nothing at all x.x

  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    edited October 2017
    For starters I see you have a great fear of plateaus. Actually plateaus are not really plateaus, they are usually just slowing down of your weight loss, if you are consistently sticking to a calorie deficit daily/weekly. Of course if you spend 6-8 weeks in one several things need to be reviewed in your weight loss efforts (logging efforts, changes in activity, exercise, dietary, cheat days, etc).

    Honestly motivation is within yourself. We all have it, just have to tap into it and yes you have to make the hard decisions to set weight goals and stick to those goals.

    Make the hard decision today to use the gym membership, changing your diet through the foods you bought and use those new cute workout clothes you bought and do it for say 1-2-3 months. Once you see results after sticking to your mini goal, make another mini goal, etc.

    If you stall out, don't panic and give up. Consistency and diligence to the process is what scales results, in other words trust the process.

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10475585/weight-loss-plateaus-alan-aragons-assessment#latest
  • JustRobby1
    JustRobby1 Posts: 674 Member
    First of all, motivation has to come from within and is not something we can provide for you. We can provide you with the proper tools and knowledge, but frankly losing weight is not quantum physics. Though some people do their best to make it as difficult on themselves as possible. The fact of the matter is I could teach a not so bright 3rd grader to use this app to achieve a deficit. CICO is simple in conception, with the difficulty coming for people in execution.

    If this is something you want badly enough, you will do what is required to make that happen. We can help you, but we can't make you want it, and that is the most critical factor to success.
  • MegaMooseEsq
    MegaMooseEsq Posts: 3,118 Member
    GrumpyHeadmistress wrote: »
    It sounds like you have had the very natural mindset of “this is a diet, it’s temporary, I’ll just do what I need to do to lose the weight and then go back to eating ‘normally’”. Unfortunately keeping a close eye on your calories IS your new normal - it’s something you’re going to need to do for the rest of your life if you want to keep the weight off.

    I completely agree. Think about this not as going on a diet, but changing the way you eat permanently. I'm a big fan of taking things slow. Instead of trying to jump into a restrictive diet with a big deficit, maybe spend some time figuring out your normal eating patterns. Get a sense of where your maintenance calories are. Log everything. And then instead of changing everything at once to get down to 1600 or whatever, start making gradual changes to your normal diet and sticking with them. If you weigh 300 pounds (assuming no weird medical issues), you've probably got a lot of places you could start making changes. Can you swap out an afternoon soda for something zero calorie? Can you stomach low-fat mayo (BLECH)? Are there changes to the times you eat or the ways you snack that would cut down your calories?

    The thing is, losing weight like this is probably going to be frustrating and slow at first, but the point is to teach yourself to eat differently 100% of the time, not just when you're on a diet. I started off at the beginning of the year wanting to lose about 73 lbs, and it's taken nine and a half months to drop the first 32. But I still eat things I like to eat, I don't eat things I hate (low fat mayo, BLECH), and I never have to worry about falling off of the diet wagon because there is no wagon. This is just the way I eat now. Good luck!
  • hiyomi
    hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
    =sigh= I made a long post but apparently it didn’t post up...tldr: thanks for the input, but I’m positive I’ve been calorie counting correctly and honestly. Also, my doctor told me I gained 25 lbs in one year which I’d never done in the last 8 years of going there. She recommended me to switch my birth control which could be the problem. It’s never caused me not lose weight in the last 9 years of using it, but I think it’s still worth a shot just in case. Finding the right birth control is pretty nerve wrecking, especially since I’ve only been on the depo provera shot all the time. I’m looking into which would be the best one for me.
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,213 Member
    I have procrastinated starting a diet before. Lots of times in fact. In my case it was because I made the diets too difficult. I had to have huge motivation to start and stick with the kind of diets I used to think were normal. Do you think this might be your problem too?

    If it's too hard to get started again, make it easier.
  • Mouse_Potato
    Mouse_Potato Posts: 1,513 Member
    If you are absolutely 100% sure your logging is correct, you should probably have another talk with your doctor. I weigh 115 and I would lose a pound a week at 1600 calories.
  • hiyomi
    hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
    VintageFeline wrote: »
    The only way you gain or maintain or fail to lose is too many calories. This is not to shame you in any way, I was obese myself, but at 300lbs if you were truly eating 1600 calories and exercising, even with one of the few medical conditions that make weight loss harder, the weight would be flying off a fair old clip.

    So when you decide to give it a go, buy a food scale, weight all solids and semi-solids, measure all liquids, cross reference entries and avoid user created/generic recipes (like lasagne, or chicken stir fry etc). If you log accurately I can 100% guarantee you will lose weight.

    Thanks for your input but I have a food scale and have been logging on and off for years. I’ve lost over 70 lbs in the past, so I’m sure the calorie counting isn’t off, and that I was not underestimating ^_^

  • shaunshaikh
    shaunshaikh Posts: 616 Member
    Open your diary.
  • quiksylver296
    quiksylver296 Posts: 28,439 Member
    "What to do when you just can’t stop."

    It sounds like you can stop, and you have over and over again. Maybe you should quit stopping, instead.
  • hiyomi
    hiyomi Posts: 906 Member
    shaunshaikh wrote: »
    Open your diary.

    I don’t have anything logged since I haven’t been here in months. My post was the only thing I’ve put up since April I believe.

  • Poisonedpawn78
    Poisonedpawn78 Posts: 1,145 Member
    You can lie to strangers on a forum.
    You can even lie to yourself to make yourself feel better.

    You CANNOT lie to your body. And your body is clearly saying your estimating is off and you are eating more than you think if you are not losing weight.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    "hiyomi wrote: »
    , but I’m positive I’ve been calorie counting correctly and honestly.

    Everybody says that. Open your diary, we can help you debug the issue.
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,179 Member
    @hiyomi , from your original post, this line struck me, " I’m finding it really hard to try at all."
    What does that mean?
    By that question I hope to get you thinking about how you go about 'trying' to lose weight.

    For me, in my position, I'm not trying to lose weight at all. I'm just living. I have a few breakfasts I can assemble and enjoy, but only one per day. I have a few dinners I can assemble and enjoy, but only one per day. I have some treats of chocolate and ice cream, which are important to me, and I have learned that one bowl of ice cream and one piece of chocolate each day can be achieved within my calorie budget. Where in that is "trying" to lose weight? I enjoy a variety of breakfast food, a variety of dinner food, and a variety of snacks. During workdays I have a very small lunch, and on weekends I have a lunch resembling my dinners or a restaurant meal resembling my dinners. I log some exercise without getting too intense about it. If I stay alive and live like that, my weight will eventually become less than it is now.
  • cbelc2
    cbelc2 Posts: 762 Member
    I find it easier to stay on my plan if I eat a Mediterranean style diet. It’s not a ‘diet’. It’s my new way of eating for life. I think I might be addicted to sugar and I don’t crave it if I don’t eat it. Logging before meals has also helped me stay on plan. You can do this.
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