Does having MFP buddies really help?

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  • Jeepfreak81
    Jeepfreak81 Posts: 35 Member
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    Awesome, thanks for the replies. I'll have to check out the challenges, I'm a pretty competitive person so that could be something to help me with my goals
  • randomlyred
    randomlyred Posts: 23 Member
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    I don't think it's helpful - I had a goal of bulking through the middle of last year but the only time people would send me messaged is when I lost weight. I got annoyed and disheartened trying to bulk when the only support I got was when I 'failed' at my goal and lost weight, like I was doing something bad.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
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    Some people like working on common goals. Others like working by themselves.
  • newheavensearth
    newheavensearth Posts: 870 Member
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    Friends help me because the fact that they will see my diary keeps me on the straight and narrow. A lot less 3000+ calorie days that way. Likes are encouraging. The advice is encouraging. I'm learning a lot from them and from the forums (transitioning from WW). I get meal ideas from open diaries also.
  • TonyB0588
    TonyB0588 Posts: 9,520 Member
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    There's three levels to it:

    1) Reading Friends news-feeds and either "liking" or commenting on their calories burnt or completion of their food diary.
    2) Posting on the forums and commenting on posts by your Friends and choosing new Friends based on their posts.
    3) Actually sending private messages to your Friends about their Food Diary or their Exercise routine, and any other general discussion.

    I don't think much of #3 happens in reality.
  • Jingsi84
    Jingsi84 Posts: 127 Member
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    I don’t mind friends but I cannot stand all of the email blasts when you like a post or comment. And god help you if your friends have a lot of friends that comment-you get emails for all those randoms too. Probably a way to change that in the settings, but for me it’s just as easy to keep a small, select group of friends.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
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    I'm sorry (not sorry) but I cringe when people ask for friends for motivation and accountability. But that's just me.

    I add people who show they are interested in learning from the forum community, which has helped me so much.

    Usually I either send a friend request with message to say I've seen them post and think they're insightful, or I accept a friend request with message from someone who shows they've been reading the forums and learning.

    I don't think the MFP news feed is a great place to learn all there is about using MFP and weight management.

    I certainly don't think people who join and ask for friends the same weight/height/lack of motivation are looking to learn from successful people.

    Again, that's just how I roll.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
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    Jeepfreak81 wrote: »
    Awesome, thanks for the replies. I'll have to check out the challenges, I'm a pretty competitive person so that could be something to help me with my goals

    Huge recommendation from me for the MFP Monthly Running Challenge threads.

    Not people being competitive with each other, but rather working towards each other being more successful at running.

    Possibly the most active, helpful, and supportive place on MFP.

    From Couch to 5K to 100 mile ultramarathoners, it's a wonderful mix of people sharing knowlege, highs, and lows.

    Absolutely love it.

  • Jessie24330
    Jessie24330 Posts: 224 Member
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    I love reading, and occasionally commenting, in the forums. I've "tried" friends two different times and they are just not for me. Not to sound mean, but I don't want to feel obligated to "like" someone's 652 calories burned in 12 minutes of 2 mph walking downhill (yes, I've seen some ridiculous stuff). I also don't want to use people as motivation. I need to do this for myself and by myself. I'm not always going to have someone cheering me on or watching me so I need to hold myself accountable. I've personally found that I do better without friends.
  • GOT_Obsessed
    GOT_Obsessed Posts: 817 Member
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    toxikon wrote: »
    I like that I can post updates and chat with like-minded people instead of blabbing at my real-life friends about calories and weight loss - because I guarantee they'd get annoyed pretty damn quick.

    Yes this is me as well.
  • Poisonedpawn78
    Poisonedpawn78 Posts: 1,145 Member
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    I think it depends how you use them. I've seen people get immense amounts of support stop and leave, I've seen people use it like Facebook looking for attention and eventually stop and leave. If you be honest with whats happening, ask for help and advice and when it makes sense to actually listen and incorporate things from people who have succeeded it can be VERY helpful. don't worry about being embarrassed about a bad day or lack of progress. Everyone on here has probably had days like that.

    The moment you try to hide and avoid them knowing the truth, you are already down the road to failure.
  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,237 Member
    edited January 2018
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    I’ve been here logging all my food for a little over 6 years. I’ve had friends for ~5-ish years. I have found them to be the best part of this process.

    We talk about fitnessy things (my friends have interests that run the gamut from endurance racing to powerlifting and just general fitness), we talk food (a LOT-I have some awesome chefs on my list), we talk life things, we share funny things, we lament about injuries and illness, we cheer for each other’s successes and help pick each other up after setbacks.

    It’s a little community. When I’m feeling down or having a difficult day or life feels a little overwhelming and I’m feeling like maybe I just don’t have the energy to make healthy choices today, that community helps me get through those days. They don’t make choices for me, they don’t really have any affect on what I do other than simply being there and caring. Not the elusive motivation and accountability- more just a presence and knowing that I’m part of this community of people fighting a lot of the same battles and all of us working towards our own individual goals. I’m now friends with several of my Mfp friends outside of Mfp. I’ve done OCR’s and running races with people I’ve met through my Mfp FL.

    My FL includes people of all ages, heights, genders, people trying to bulk, maintain, or lose anywhere from 5-200 pounds. I’ve got friends who eat just about every variety of diet imaginable. The one thing we have in common is compassion, a good sense of humor, lack of judgment, and common interest in health and fitness pursuits.

    My diary is closed and I’m accountable to me. My Mfp friends serve the same purpose as my IRl friends: support and fun. They just happen to be more willing to listen to me yammer about long runs, workouts, food, more food, and more food.

    YMMV as evident from this thread.
  • MichelleWithMoxie
    MichelleWithMoxie Posts: 1,817 Member
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    The social aspect is pure entertainment, and can also be super helpful and informative. I like having an active friend list, as it makes it more fun. And, funnily enough, I met my now husband through here on mfp back in 2013 :blush:
  • sgt1372
    sgt1372 Posts: 3,988 Member
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    Iwantahealthierme30 wrote: »
    I like participating in the forums but I don't accept friend requests. . . . I just don't see the point.

    ^Ditto.

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