Maintainers Help Needed
Replies
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At the risk of sounding flippant (which I truly don't mean to be), the professional I'd recommend would be a mental health counselor.
You say that you're happy with your body but feel self conscious about wearing a bathing suit. It seems to me that the best action would be to change your mindset about wearing a bathing suit rather than changing your body.5 -
First and foremost, @nowine4me - it’s very humbling to see you asking this question as I see you as a beacon of honest truth and wisdom on these forums regularly.
With that said, I am always an advocate of Time and strength training here. Surgery should always be seen as a last resort, after all other options have been exhausted. My next steps would be to start researching recomp, take lots of photos for progress comparison and start lifting heavy things!2 -
Here's the thing - if it's skin that has stretched and lost it's elasticity, no amount of recomp, lifting etc will help. Losing more weight will only make it worse (as others have said). I am a huge believer in doing whatever it takes to make yourself more comfortable/happy in your own skin. My vote (if we are voting) is to go onto realself.com, research plastic surgeon's and go on a few consults. Nothing wrong with a little PS IMO. And BTW - well done! You look amazing1
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To repeat other posters. Nobody on the beach cares! At all! I am the same height as you, quite a bit heavier than you, and very stretch marked due to large babies and fast pregnancy weight gain. I have cellulite, loose belly flab, and 20-25lbs I would love to get rid of. I leave for New Zealand in 2 weeks and I will be wearing my bikini. I am from Manitoba and the thought of covering skin when I can be absorbing maximum vitamin D is horrifying to me! There is always someone larger than me, smaller than me, more tanned, and with zero leg fuzz when I may have skipped shaving that morn. Nobody cares. If you only concern is bikini wearing I would say skip the worrying and just do you. And it looks like you have a lot to be proud of! Great work!11
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We live in an overweight and obese society. Anyone who sees you in a bathing suit is a lot more likely to think, "She's skinny" than, "She doesn't look like a 15 year old model." Most people won't even notice your saggy skin. The few who do will also see your muscles and know that you must have worked really hard to look as good as you do.
I'm older (61) and have saggy skin on my arms and thighs that will probably never disappear. I don't care. I'm proud of the weight I lost, I'm proud of what I can do that I didn't used to be able to do (run marathons) and anybody who judges me for not being perfect can stuff it.8 -
As a result of y’alls sage advice, I booked two tickets to Grand Cayman in March. I ordered two beautiful size 4 sundresses. I set weekly appointments with a trainer until vacay and I’m going to work my butt off this year. October will be two full years of maintenance— so I’ll see how things are Looking and take it from there. Thanks again for all your guidance.30
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lift more, your doing great! you won't get "big" at all, just fill in the skin a bit, so I agree with the trainer a bit becasue I've been there. But, when will you be satisfied? I say enjoy the "journey" of your transformation because you obviously have done excellent!! You deserve to be happy and content with how you are because you have earned your way there. Now, you can maintain and polish your look. You look amazing! Good Job!3
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What type of professional would you see? I’m 5-7”, 134#, 24%bf age 52F. I’m at what is considered ideal for my stats. I lost 85# over 2 years via good diet, walking/running and lifting. Yet I still have very loose flabby bags on my belly, thighs and arms. It’s not improved in a year.
Primary doc says stop losing
Plastic surgeon says I need body lift
Dermatologist says live with it
Trainer says lose more and lift more
Dietician has no opinion on the subject
Personally, I think I look great in clothes. But would be very uncomfortable in front if anyone but my husband in a bathing suit. Thoughts?
Your loose skin is a badge of honor in a strange way. I never plan to have mine removed, as long as I can keep the weight off! Be proud!2 -
If i ended up with loose flabby skin/boobs I'd get surgery. Howeeeever i would wait at least a couple of years after hitting my goal weight, and the bigger issue... Money.
I would have to be incredibly well off to fork out thousands of dollars on cosmetic surgery. If i had to scrimp and save to come up with the cash or take a loan out etc then i wouldn't even consider it. As it stands now i could think of a million better things to spend my money on.
Long story short, i would do it, if i waited a good amount of time after reaching my goal, and i was a millionaire
You're also one up on me, I wont even wear a bikini in front of my husband!3 -
Maintain and lift.2
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Hooray for March holidays. We are cruising the Caribbean the last 2 weeks.
And yes, I will be a brazen bikini wearer.
Are your sundresses for swimming in too? If not- get yourself some swimwear, and a cover up.
Most people don't saunter around in their bikini, even in hot climates you usually need to be covered to get drinks and food.
Your hesitation is as others have said is due to not being use to yourself so scantily dressed.
Wear your sundress or swim wear around the house for a couple of weeks before you go away. It is not just about how you think you look staring straight in the mirror for 5 min, it is about how comfortable you feel in it, how easily you move, and wearing it with good posture and confidence.
If you would have asked me a few years ago if, in my 50's I would wear a bikini I would have rolled around the floor laughing.
In fact when I started aqua fit at 54 I was so self conscious I got a tri suit that covered me neck to knee with a zip up the front.
When we went to the Med a couple of years later, modest swim suit.
NO ONE GAVE ME A SECOND GLANCE.
I hated the clingy wetness and difficulty changing it out.
When we went to the Caribbean a couple of years after that, I was a bikini convert.
I wore it at home so me and SO we're both use to seeing all the skin out of the bedroom.
I threw the darn thing on as soon as we got on the ship, so I wouldn't chicken out, and never looked back.
I had 2, I think, so I could change them out, so much easier. That, the slimey wetness, and multi snorkelling trips a day, is what converted me.
Yes I have saggy inner thighs, yes my arms wobble, and most definitely yes I am an apple with a B belly that will never look sleek. Ya know what, I don't care, and no one else does either.
Now I have a collection of 6-7 bikinis and get teased ( lovingly) by friends all the time.
Cheers, h.
PS: I think you know me well enough that you have seen my progress pic while in maintenance, but I will post it all the same in the hopes it will encourage you.
The left is at goal, and on that first Caribbean cruise. The others are progress over 2-3 years of gentle/slow recomp.
The second pic is just so you can see, the cruise bloat doesn't deter.
NB: the belly may look good-ish standing, sitting it folds in on itself and hide my belly button (2 bloops)
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@nowine4me
Congratulations on your weigh loss and maintenance. Well done!
You do seem to be worry about wearing a bathing suit in public , but why does it have to be a bikini? I really never understood the need and obsession about that kind of bathing suit when they are so many other choices. Have you consider a two piece bathing suit with a nice tankini (sp?) covering your stomach? Or a bottom with a nice swimming skirt. (https://www.bing.com/shopq=two+pieces+bathing+suit+with+a+tankini&FORM=SHOPPA&originIGUID=50A3CD30027D477A94E3406106FCCCD0)
I hope that the above link shows so you can have an idea of what I mean. Good luck with what ever decision you make.
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middlehaitch wrote: »Hooray for March holidays. We are cruising the Caribbean the last 2 weeks.
And yes, I will be a brazen bikini wearer.
Are your sundresses for swimming in too? If not- get yourself some swimwear, and a cover up.
Most people don't saunter around in their bikini, even in hot climates you usually need to be covered to get drinks and food.
Your hesitation is as others have said is due to not being use to yourself so scantily dressed.
Wear your sundress or swim wear around the house for a couple of weeks before you go away. It is not just about how you think you look staring straight in the mirror for 5 min, it is about how comfortable you feel in it, how easily you move, and wearing it with good posture and confidence.
If you would have asked me a few years ago if, in my 50's I would wear a bikini I would have rolled around the floor laughing.
In fact when I started aqua fit at 54 I was so self conscious I got a tri suit that covered me neck to knee with a zip up the front.
When we went to the Med a couple of years later, modest swim suit.
NO ONE GAVE ME A SECOND GLANCE.
I hated the clingy wetness and difficulty changing it out.
When we went to the Caribbean a couple of years after that, I was a bikini convert.
I wore it at home so me and SO we're both use to seeing all the skin out of the bedroom.
I thee w the darn thing on as soon as we got on the ship, so I wouldn't chicken out, and never looked back.
I had 2, I think, so I could change them out, so much easier. That, and multi snorkelling trips a day, is what converted me.
Yes I have saggy inner thighs, yes my arms wobble, and most definitely yes I am an apple with a B belly that will never look sleek. Ya know what, I don't care, and no one else does either.
Now I have a collection of 6-7 bikinis and get teased ( lovingly) by friends all the time.
Cheers, h.
PS: I think you know me well enough that you have seen my progress pic while in maintenance, but I will post it all the same in the hopes it will encourage you.
The left is at goal, and on that first Caribbean cruise. The others are progress over 2-3 years of gentle/slow recomp.
The second pic is just so you can see, the cruise bloat doesn't deter.
NB: the belly may look good-ish standing, sitting it folds in on itself and hide my belly button (2 bloops)
You look absolutely amazing! OP,who cares what anybody thinks,you've done a great job with your weight loss,be proud!1 -
You're a fox "H". And wine or no wine so are you, OP!4
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Mutual admiration society @PAV8888, I've always admired @nowine4me.
As a little aside.
My profile pic was last year in Curaçao.
General outfit, bikini with lawn shirt over the top, usually open.
So, every morning I would put on the 'outfit' go and sit out with a coffee and chocolate croissant.
Every morning ther would be a 40+ woman running the track.
Every morning we would wave.
I thought, ' wow, I wish I had the determination to get a body like her's'.
We started shouting comments and encouragement to each other.
Turned out she was thinking 'I wish I had a body like her's' too.
How you perceive yourself isn't always as others do. We had lots of mutual admiration drinks together after that.
Cheers, h.12 -
Hey @middlehaitch I'm in for the eye candy! (Planks excluded as gravity doesn't work *for* me there either.... )1
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middlehaitch wrote: »Hooray for March holidays. We are cruising the Caribbean the last 2 weeks.
And yes, I will be a brazen bikini wearer.
Are your sundresses for swimming in too? If not- get yourself some swimwear, and a cover up.
Most people don't saunter around in their bikini, even in hot climates you usually need to be covered to get drinks and food.
Your hesitation is as others have said is due to not being use to yourself so scantily dressed.
Wear your sundress or swim wear around the house for a couple of weeks before you go away. It is not just about how you think you look staring straight in the mirror for 5 min, it is about how comfortable you feel in it, how easily you move, and wearing it with good posture and confidence.
If you would have asked me a few years ago if, in my 50's I would wear a bikini I would have rolled around the floor laughing.
In fact when I started aqua fit at 54 I was so self conscious I got a tri suit that covered me neck to knee with a zip up the front.
When we went to the Med a couple of years later, modest swim suit.
NO ONE GAVE ME A SECOND GLANCE.
I hated the clingy wetness and difficulty changing it out.
When we went to the Caribbean a couple of years after that, I was a bikini convert.
I wore it at home so me and SO we're both use to seeing all the skin out of the bedroom.
I threw the darn thing on as soon as we got on the ship, so I wouldn't chicken out, and never looked back.
I had 2, I think, so I could change them out, so much easier. That, the slimey wetness, and multi snorkelling trips a day, is what converted me.
Yes I have saggy inner thighs, yes my arms wobble, and most definitely yes I am an apple with a B belly that will never look sleek. Ya know what, I don't care, and no one else does either.
Now I have a collection of 6-7 bikinis and get teased ( lovingly) by friends all the time.
Cheers, h.
PS: I think you know me well enough that you have seen my progress pic while in maintenance, but I will post it all the same in the hopes it will encourage you.
The left is at goal, and on that first Caribbean cruise. The others are progress over 2-3 years of gentle/slow recomp.
The second pic is just so you can see, the cruise bloat doesn't deter.
NB: the belly may look good-ish standing, sitting it folds in on itself and hide my belly button (2 bloops)
You're rocking those bikinis! Love it!2 -
@cmriverside - that’s me at my current weight and in a flattering shot. Doing planks on the other hand, is not a great look. Luckily I don’t plank on the beach much. Hopefully time will be kind to me as it was for you.
Girl I am at a good weight without excess skin and if I ever glance down my top while doing planks I am also full of disappointment
How long have you been maintaining? I know diddly squat about it, but is it something that will rectify over time with a continued positive lifestyle?3 -
@middlehaitch you are kind AND hilarious. Have an awesome vacation!7
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