So you’ve lost the weight...

GoalGal50

Do you find that you’re treated differently by the public / family?

Unknown

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rainbow198

Night and day difference. Night and freaking day. lol

Seriously though it feels like I've lived 2 completely different lives. In some ways it was actually easier being bigger (not that I miss it because I don't!)

zyxst

Yep. I get treated like I exist.

amusedmonkey

Not that I've noticed. I get treated like I've always been treated. People, even complete strangers, seem to like me for some reason regardless of my weight.

JDixon852019

Women are a lot less nice to me.

JustSomeJD

I get more looks from women, otherwise no. My mom will only make comments about my weight loss to my wife. Never me.

elisa123gal

i have always noticed..as soon as i get down to a certain weight... men in general notice me...and the women..and not as friendly. totally odd...but it is just the way it is.

jrulo16 wrote: »

Women are a lot less nice to me.

Azercord

For me it has been about the same. I'm pretty open and friendly to begin with though so that might be part of it. Still haven't had anyone buy me a drink in the bar but nor have I have anyone be overly rude (beyond normal everyday people things)

wizzybeth

Three years ago I lost 50 lbs. Got lots of compliments even from people with whom I share a mutual dislike. That was about the extent of it.

But the one person I most wanted to hear from, my husband, remained silent, as if I didn't just lose an amazing amount of weight.

I ended up gaining it all back because for various reasons I gave up.

This time I expect more of the same except I am not going to expect anything from my husband, nor am I going to give up.

Nobody really treated me differently; just were complimentary.

DebLaBounty

Nope. I have received a number of compliments from friends and family, but they love me just the same. Nobody has been snarky. Sometimes when I turn to the side, someone will gasp and say, "Wow, you look great!" Then they ask my secret and I rave about MFP, or just say I move more and eat less.

LivingtheLeanDream

I'm kinda fed up of being told I'm too slim and need to just eat more! so not true btw!

wizzybeth

LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »

I'm kinda fed up of being told I'm too slim and need to just eat more! so not true btw!

Omg I heard that from people all the time when I was a young adult. (Everyone except my father that is who just thought it was the thing to do to call all the women in his life that. Except for my mom who was as thin as a rail. But he always called me Porky. Always.... From the time I approached puberty and did put on a bit of pudge as my body weight was redistributing itself as I transformed from a girl to a woman... But even later as a teenager who was very slender he still insisted on calling me Porky. I hated him for it.)

Meanwhile, everyone else in my life complained that I was too skinny and looked like an anorexic. It's no wonder I was messed up LOL

dsboohead

Yup my dad also mentioned I was getting a little thick as I was in puberty....duh!!!
That comment sent me straight into anorexia for most of my teenage years.....not good
Dads be careful what you say to your teenage daughters about their bodies....you could click an unintentional mechanism in their brains!

GLady1980

I used to be quite skinny and now I am not and I will tell yah it is like being 2 different people the way you are treated!!

seltzermint555

Family, not really. Friends, at first but after about 3 years of maintenance they're used to the changes.
Acquaintances (female) are generally much more eager to hang out and invite me to things.
Random guys compliment me and then don't act like they're expecting a big smile & my eternal gratitude right after (which they always did before).
As for the general public, I feel like people don't give me the same amount of personal space. When I was 100+ pounds heavier people tended to stay back a few feet from me. I didn't realize this until getting to an average size and feeling people all up in my bubble in public spaces. It's still weird to me.

GoalGal50

Wow, thanks Ladies really interesting responses

ITUSGirl51

Yes I’m treated nicer in general. I get help when shopping for clothes. Work associates I’ve just met don’t automatically underestimate me. I’m down about 60lbs and my manager noticed today. I’ve got my fingers crossed I’m up for a promotion soon. Ha ha...I’m the same person I was a year ago, They are falling for my evil plan lol

apullum

It’s harder to find clothes in my new sizes than in my old sizes.

People congratulate me on my body now. No one congratulated me on my body before.

Things are made to fit the body I have now. Airline seats are plenty wide enough and no one seems upset at the idea of sitting next to me.

People assume that I don’t eat various things, particularly bread or sweets. I eat chocolate every day and rice several times a week.

No one seems surprised to see me exercising now, nor do they seem to think I’m doing an exceptionally great job at that exercise.

Some family members think I’m “too skinny,” despite being right in the middle of the optimal BMI range for my height.

Vonny198334

Yes & no would be the answer to that!

Folk I never really interacted with before now love a wee chat. Especially women. But as I analysed this, I realised that before I lost 52lb (with still the same to go!) I was more often than not in pain or tired & probably looked less than friendly. Now I'm pain free & wide awake most mornings, I think I must look an awful lot more approachable. I've not changed any as a person, but I look up more instead of at my feet...I don't dread folk interrupting me at work or in the street anymore because I don't just long for everything to be over anymore so I can hit the sofa. Think most folk just use my weight loss so far as a wee conversation starter. It's been difficult to deal with all the lovely compliments (always shied away from the "spotlight" as it were) but folk mean well, even if it can feel a bit strange to be on the recieving end....

My lovely husband told me last weekend that he's amused to note other men "checking me out" often now. He's my biggest cheerleader, bless him. Have to say I've not noticed, but I've never been observant about that kind of thing regardless of size!

BNY721

Both. It’s mostly positive, but can be negative too. I do what I do for me, so while I appreciate the positive, I never let the negative affect me. I’ve worked too hard.

DarianJP

I’d have to say yes. My family acts like I’m withering away and any time I go to visit they’re forcing food on me. Lol I understand love and food correlate but that’s how I gained weight in the first place and they don’t see that.

laur357

I got noticeably more second interviews and job offers while having the same experience.

MySweetLavinia

Yes, people definitely treat me differently. Strangers in general are much nicer and more accomodating. I get called "honey" and "sweetheart" a lot now, especially by men. I dunno what that's about.

amyteacake

I've found that certain people have treated me differently since I've lost weight. A guy that used to bully me in high school attempted to flirt with me and try to meet up when I first started losing weight despite the fact he was one of the people that bullied me and my friend for our appearances.

My family haven't. They just ask me how I am, ask me about the gym and stuff and that's it.

Friends, however, is a different story. I lost friends when I started to lose weight. They told me that I've changed but all that had happened was that I finally grew confidence, became more comfortable with myself and finally started to put my foot down and say no when I wasn't happy with something. But to them I was a terrible person

cwolfman13

No...

potatoyeti

Family and friends minimal change (their has been a bit of jealousy from a couple acquaintances). Have definitely noticed a difference when interacting with strangers though and how they percieve me.

birdenerd

This is one of the things I'm curious about. I'm still in the process of losing weight but I've been heavy my entire life so I wonder if/how things will change. I doubt friends and family will treat me any different but I don't know how interactions with strangers will be..

Ghostofachance

Strangers most definitely treat you differently when you lose a significant amount of weight. When I was heavy, there were times when I was treated with condescension and outright rudeness; most notably, when I had to sit between two men (who admittedly were also obese) on an airplane.

Once I began to lose weight, people were generally friendlier; in fact, I got hit on several times in public. Now that I'm heavier again and trying to lose weight once more, I can tell you I haven't been hit on by a stranger in a while!

Friends and family tend to doubt your ability to lose weight, then cheer you on as they begin to see noticeable changes. However, at a certain point, I found out that some of my friends and family believed that all I focused on was weight loss and I became a little egocentric which, to be fair, was probably true. I got wrapped up in my success and wanted it to continue for as long as possible. I also experienced a little envy and a few pointed comments about how I'd gain it all back. While I didn't gain it all back, I ended up gaining 40% of the initial weight loss.

I'm back at it because I want to maintain a healthier lifestyle. If others choose to treat me differently, it's outside my control.

GoalGal50

Wow

Jobar001

Friends, however, is a different story. I lost friends when I started to lose weight. They told me that I've changed but all that had happened was that I finally grew confidence, became more comfortable with myself and finally started to put my foot down and say no when I wasn't happy with something. But to them I was a terrible person[/quote]

This is one of my biggest fears about the whole process! I know it's good for me. But it's scary!