New member intro and question: what change would you make first?

mkculs

Hi. I'm a 59 year old woman who has been overweight for the past 20 years, after the birth of my 2nd child (who is, yes, now 20!). I've also gained weight steadily over the past 5 years or so and reached my current weight of 240 just recently. Nothing fits and I am miserably uncomfortable in my own skin and clothes. I have been a life-long jogger but due to an injury, was off most of the past 6 months, and at this weight, have found it very hard going in the past 2 weeks, trying to get back to the jogging. I'm starting slow and listening to my body, and realize I'll need to walk a lot more than jog for the next several months. I bought new running shorts so I'd be comfortable while exercising but don't want to buy new clothes for work so close to the end of the school year (I'm a teacher and I love my job).

I have been feeling pretty sad lately, missing my two sons (one at college, one at a new job out of state). My 16 year old daughter has been difficult in the past few years. I've quit cooking b/c she complained so much about what I cooked. I've been letting the cleaning slide a lot, too, and realize I am definitely more depressed than I need to be--even though I'm on an antidepressant and have been for 18 years. I love my job, and when I'm outside, walking or jogging, I love it. But I have zero motivation to do anything else. I work, then work out a bit 3 days a week, and do pretty much nothing else. I'm online a lot. I had a physical recently and have some appointments to help--physical therapy to help with some back pain (within the next month), 2 appointments (a couple of months away) related to psychological and medical support for weight loss.

I need to make a lot of changes and am not sure where to start. I want to eat healthier (but hate to cook, so giving it up was no big deal for me), and I want to keep my home nicer. I want to get out and about more, too, without necessarily having to spend a lot of money--I hate shopping.

Any suggestions will be much appreciated. I know that trying to do too much too soon is very counterproductive, so will be trying to figure this out step by step, week by week.

Thanks and I look forward to

concordancia

For your situation, I would start by adding strength training. Sure, strength training is great and all, but most important, it is easy to see improvement over short periods of time.

I chose body weight. I did pushups off a counter. I could do another push up or two every training day for weeks! That is the kind of tangible victory you need right now.

kimny72

Just start logging your food and make note of what foods fill you up and make hitting your calorie goal easier, and what foods leave you hungry and make it harder. This will make it easier for you to see little changes you can make to your eating, step by step. Good luck!

__TMac__

I can very much relate. My oldest was very difficult in his teen years, and I’ve got two more in the middle of it. I’ve learned a few things about myself.

Since you like running, maybe ease back into it with a C25K (walk/run) program? When my teens are particularly difficult, I find it useful to get out and focus on myself for a little while, and burn off the frustration. Drive to a new running path or nice trail. Go to the Y and see all the other people taking small steps to take care of themselves. I also try to eat well — nutritious foods I enjoy, in portions that sustain my weight loss — because that’s another form of self-care.

It’s helped me to remember that my goal is not to have a happy teenager (although that would be nice). My goal is to raise a content, independent adult. I provide meals that I think are best because, as adults, they’ll be well served by normalizing nutritious, appropriate portions. I can also normalize an active lifestyle, even if they don’t want to join me right now. At 35, they’ll think that normal adults get some sort of exercise, and might actually enjoy it!

Short version: I’d pick whatever small thing you’d find enjoyable and sustainable, and do it because it feels good to be nice to yourself. If you’d like to lose weight, start by figuring a small dietary change that will put you in calorie deficit. If you think exercise would help with your depression, start with that.

One small thing to take care of yourself. You can do it.

mkculs

Thanks. I found some good advice on a pinned post somewhere about "starting over": write down what works and what doesn't (among other things). I thought I'd add mine here so others can benefit from that advice, too. What has worked for me in the past: weighing/measuring/logging food; cooking for the week on Sundays. What has NOT worked: eating the same "healthy" foods over and over again.

lorib642

I do not have advice, but i am right there with you. You really can't go wrong. Those are all good goals.