Let Me Down Easy..

caco_ethes
caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
edited June 2018 in Chit-Chat
Or not?

Everyone knows mfp is a whirlwind of crushes and micro-romances, oftentimes simultaneously. But what to do when that starts to fade?

This came up in a conversation yesterday and I thought it was interesting enough to make a thread about. So what do you prefer? Do you want the bald truth if someone has lost interest in you? If you’re the one losing interest, do you feel like you need to spare their feelings?

This is not specific to MFP but this could be a way to vaguely let someone know that it’s safe to be blunt.. or not.

EDIT: Also, how do you know when someone is over you and moved on?
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Replies

  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Personally, I’d want to know bluntly. The sooner the better. Then we can move on to dishing about your new flings :smirk:
  • CaptainFantastic01
    CaptainFantastic01 Posts: 9,558 Member
    I just sent pictures of a banana until they stop sending melons back
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    I just sent pictures of a banana until they stop sending melons back

    Well, sometimes I need to see a peach.
  • CaptainFantastic01
    CaptainFantastic01 Posts: 9,558 Member
    I just sent pictures of a banana until they stop sending melons back

    Well, sometimes I need to see a peach.

    I send those too, I am flexible on the type of fruit I receive, bananas, peaches, melons, I’m not picky
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    lstrat115 wrote: »
    When I am juggling too many MFP men I just say I am really busy (which is always true) and I stop sending nudes. This also weeds out certain people who clearly aren't interested in my fabulous brain.

    UNPOSSIBLE
  • SpartanRunner1978
    SpartanRunner1978 Posts: 1,049 Member
    Just ignore me...I’ll get the hint!!!
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    #coolkidproblems
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Just ignore me...I’ll get the hint!!!

    Really? I’m honestly asking. You would prefer this to being told ‘hey, I’m kinda not that into this anymore’?
  • R3d_butt3rfly
    R3d_butt3rfly Posts: 1,127 Member
    edited June 2018
    Just hurt my feelings. Whatever.

    Edit:
    To elaborate. I prefer the truth. It might piss me off or hurt me or both but I rather be told the truth. IRL I've been on the delivering side. Telling someone the connection is gone face to face is much harder than delivering it through a text. Also, ghosting someone because you lost interest IRL or online is a *kitten* move.
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
    The very few that I have had just have fizzled out. We both understood things had changed, we moved on. No vague hate posts, or nasty rumors (that I am aware of). Then again, the few I have had have been quality good people.
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    I added an edit, but to those who already read the post.. how do you know when someone has moved on?

    I just think this could get really interesting.

    Real life applies too
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    I think sometimes info/feelings are never directly shared to begin with so then you risk sounding stupid for making assumptions...but i could be doing it all wrong...you wanted pics of my cat, right?
  • Just_Mel_
    Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
    I shun mfp romances. I'm only here for recipe exchanges and finding out what your fitness goals are.
  • SpartanRunner1978
    SpartanRunner1978 Posts: 1,049 Member
    Obviously, in any relationship honesty is the best policy...and along with that would be an openness and willingness to let each other know what you’re feeling...
  • RunHardBeStrong
    RunHardBeStrong Posts: 33,069 Member
    For my serious answer, I would rather be told. If they just drift away and start ignoring me, I won't pursue them, beg or ask why but I would always wonder. And I would just rather know up front what's going instead of being left to feel like an idiot.
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    IRL, I just ignore people. Sometimes I wish I was better than that, but I'm not. On the flip side, I'm rarely objective enough to see when someone isn't interested in me unless it's obscenely obvious (and what I consider obscene isn't always what others consider obscene)... so if you're going to lose interest, make it stupid clear that you've lost interest.
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    I don’t know if it’s my midwestern roots but I would really struggle to be direct even though that’s what I would prefer in return
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
    edited June 2018
    caco_ethes wrote: »
    Or not?

    Everyone knows mfp is a whirlwind of crushes and micro-romances, oftentimes simultaneously.

    zazzosmdxcnm.jpg
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    Is it consider direct if you say its for the best/your benefit we dont see each other any more? Or is that the cowards way out lol.
  • SpartanRunner1978
    SpartanRunner1978 Posts: 1,049 Member
    Is it consider direct if you say its for the best/your benefit we dont see each other any more? Or is that the cowards way out lol.

    That’s tactfully direct!
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    Is it consider direct if you say its for the best/your benefit we dont see each other any more? Or is that the cowards way out lol.

    That’s tactfully direct!

    Than im tactfully vaguely direct. :)
  • SpartanRunner1978
    SpartanRunner1978 Posts: 1,049 Member
    Is it consider direct if you say its for the best/your benefit we dont see each other any more? Or is that the cowards way out lol.

    That’s tactfully direct!

    Than im tactfully vaguely direct. :)

    They/we get the hint...ha!
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
    I was once let down by someone promising me potatoes, and then come to find out they couldn't even cook. Talk about heart break
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    edited June 2018
    No sugar coating. Blunt, tell it like it is or what ever you want to call it. Served with brownies would be okay. :smile:

    I am a blunt person already. In certain cases it might be easier to hint before hand to spare feelings, but usually end up sparing 'myself' and them of beating around the bush.
  • Keto_N_Iron
    Keto_N_Iron Posts: 5,385 Member
    Just ignore me...I’ll get the hint!!!

    is it that easy?? will you delete yourself from my list? :#





    j/k <3
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    pudgy1977 wrote: »
    I was once let down by someone promising me potatoes, and then come to find out they couldn't even cook. Talk about heart break

    :'( but i was direct.
  • 2VORNT2V
    2VORNT2V Posts: 596 Member
    Wait, people hook up and send each other flirty messages on this place?

    Where do I get started!?
  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
    pudgy1977 wrote: »
    I was once let down by someone promising me potatoes, and then come to find out they couldn't even cook. Talk about heart break

    :'( but i was direct.

    Ok, you are forgiven.
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    Is it consider direct if you say its for the best/your benefit we dont see each other any more? Or is that the cowards way out lol.

    That’s tactfully direct!

    Than im tactfully vaguely direct. :)

    They/we get the hint...ha!

    I was vaguely mostly refering to IRL :p:#
  • Keto_N_Iron
    Keto_N_Iron Posts: 5,385 Member
    2VORNT2V wrote: »
    Wait, people hook up and send each other flirty messages on this place?

    Where do I get started!?

    google sexy people and use a pic as your profile