The 'mom guilt' therapy thread.

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  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    I don't actually have mum guilt. They made it to adulthood, and I resisted wringing their necks during all those obnoxious phases kids go through. My eldest gives me good reviews. My youngest is still in his teens, so he gives good reviews immediately before and after favours, and mostly grunts at all other times.

    There's no point in beating yourself up for not being perfect. The world isn't perfect. Our job isn't to keep them constantly happy and looking picture perfect, our job is to prepare them for the world.

    That's my ten pence worth.
    I don't give change.
  • pizzamyheart
    pizzamyheart Posts: 1,836 Member
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    Question: Do you give and would you like to receive supportive comments from strangers? There have been a few times I was out and saw another momma struggling (most recent example was in the grocery store - she had two kids that were just chattering like crazy and eventually she yelled at them that she couldn't think, then you could tell she was embarrassed about losing her cool in public). Sometimes I really want to say "hey, I know its tough, you're doing great". But I never know if it will be well received.

    Just an FYI... most moms don't seem to appreciate the statement, "Don't worry. My kids are aholes too". I personally would appreciate that if a mom heard my teenagers being aholes because sometimes you feel like you are the only one and you must have done everything wrong to raise such disrespectful little turds. Even tho everyone in the outside world tells you how great they are and stuff.
  • Versicolour
    Versicolour Posts: 7,164 Member
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    Question: Do you give and would you like to receive supportive comments from strangers? There have been a few times I was out and saw another momma struggling (most recent example was in the grocery store - she had two kids that were just chattering like crazy and eventually she yelled at them that she couldn't think, then you could tell she was embarrassed about losing her cool in public). Sometimes I really want to say "hey, I know its tough, you're doing great". But I never know if it will be well received.

    I publicly disowned my kids the other day. We were grocery shopping they were acting like wild animals and I walked past a woman at the yogurt section and said "They're not mine, I swear I don't know them" We had a good chat and a laugh. It certainly improved my mood and helped me get through the trip with all my children intact
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    Question: Do you give and would you like to receive supportive comments from strangers? There have been a few times I was out and saw another momma struggling (most recent example was in the grocery store - she had two kids that were just chattering like crazy and eventually she yelled at them that she couldn't think, then you could tell she was embarrassed about losing her cool in public). Sometimes I really want to say "hey, I know its tough, you're doing great". But I never know if it will be well received.
    I've turned to my now (relatively civilised) adult children and said, loud enough for the stressed out mother to hear, "you used to do that!". I hope for the double win, of letting the mother know that we've all been there and they grow out of it, and of embarrassing my kids (who absolutely deserve it!) >:)
  • _sw33tp3a_11
    _sw33tp3a_11 Posts: 4,692 Member
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    Question: Do you give and would you like to receive supportive comments from strangers? There have been a few times I was out and saw another momma struggling (most recent example was in the grocery store - she had two kids that were just chattering like crazy and eventually she yelled at them that she couldn't think, then you could tell she was embarrassed about losing her cool in public). Sometimes I really want to say "hey, I know its tough, you're doing great". But I never know if it will be well received.

    When I go the store I see people staring at me. I can feel their sympathy when they see me with 4 kids a cart full of groceries and my confused face (its just me trying to remember what else I need cause once again I have neglected to make a list because I was busy with other things) It's hard doing it all by yourself. With that said, those stares are enough for me. I don't need anyone to say "I'm sorry you're struggling" cause I will literally cry in front of them so unless you have tissue at hand, just keep on walking by 😂
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
    pizzamyheart wrote: »
    4legsRbetterthan2 wrote: »
    Question: Do you give and would you like to receive supportive comments from strangers? There have been a few times I was out and saw another momma struggling (most recent example was in the grocery store - she had two kids that were just chattering like crazy and eventually she yelled at them that she couldn't think, then you could tell she was embarrassed about losing her cool in public). Sometimes I really want to say "hey, I know its tough, you're doing great". But I never know if it will be well received.

    Just an FYI... most moms don't seem to appreciate the statement, "Don't worry. My kids are aholes too". I personally would appreciate that if a mom heard my teenagers being aholes because sometimes you feel like you are the only one and you must have done everything wrong to raise such disrespectful little turds. Even tho everyone in the outside world tells you how great they are and stuff.

    I have not gotten there yet, but according to my FB mom's group they are all *kitten* from 10-30. So, I'd say ya doing fine ;)


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