What caused your relapse? How did you get back on the horse?

JustMeandZ

About 6 years ago, I found MFP after a doctor told me I was diabetic, and was "obese". I was just over 200 pounds at that time, and hearing him use the word 'obese' kind of freaked me out. Don't get me wrong, I knew I was fat, but obese? Ugh.
So I started MFP and started to watch what I ate, and worked out (slowly at first, and then more and more over time). I felt 'great' and I lost weight! My 'happy weight' was 136. I felt and looked great at that weight, ...but the whole time I was losing, I worried about regaining it again. My husband would tell me it wouldn't happen, because I worked 'so' hard to lose it, and I knew it took a "lot" of hard work, .....but I still worried about it, because I knew a lot of people put the weight back on, and they "also" knew how hard it was to lose it too, kwim? They were no different than me.
I also lost a few friends during this time (or at least they tended to avoid me more). I honestly think the reason for that is because when they see someone doing something they know they should also be doing too, (they were also overweight) ... they tend to 'avoid' you, to keep from thinking about it for themselves, if that makes any sense? I looked like a whole new person, but some people didn't say two words about it (so prepare yourselves for that). Some people DID mention it, and that was really nice, ...but some didn't. BTW, when I saw my doctor again (the one who called me 'obese')..he really didn't have much to say about my losing 70 pounds, which kind of PMO, (Grrr!)
Anyway, I kept the weight off for about two years, & it was wonderful. I bought all new clothes, my health improved & I was really 'happy' during that time.
...but then 'life' hit, and I had several "big" issues to deal with. I won't get into all of that (this would become a 'book' if I did, lol) but lets just say I had a LOT of stress in my life, (big stress!) ...and I slowly went back to my 'old ways' of over eating and not working out...and over the following 4ish years, I gained it all back, plus a few pounds.
But now things have calmed down, and I think I really know a little more about how it all works. I know I CAN lose this weight again, and I also know it won't be easy, but it CAN be done. We can ALL lose it, if we really 'want' to. I also know more about what it means to 'stick with it' (its really IS a "lifestyle change") and that its all about keeping an eye on what goes in, and how much you're 'moving' to keep it off. For me, that'll be for 'life', and that's OK.
To be honest, I'm more worried about maintaining it than losing the weight again, ....but I know its totally possible, and if we (all) encourage each other, WE can make it happen! I can't wait to be at my 'happy weight' again, and since I've been there before, I know how exciting it'll be!
Good luck to ALL of us!
PS I also have a new doctor now, who is way more encouraging than my old one! lol

JessiBelleW

Stress! Stress gets me every time

I fall off the wagon by basically eating everything in sight for days but I still hit the gym so exercise habit sticks it’s just food that goes out when I’m struggling. The irony of course is that id probably cope better if I stuck with eating well. Takes me a couple of low stress days to just pull it together and commit back to eating well. The longer I’m conscious of my health the better I get at pulling it back together. Sometimes seeing how big my belly has gotten helps me to get back to it as wel

hipari

I don’t live in the prairie, so I don’t have horses or wagons and I’m not building railroad tracks for myself. That said, I agree with others who cite stress as an obstacle, and instead of a prairie girl I’ve been sailing my entire life.*

I just realized my weight loss mentality analogy is more about steering a sailing boat than being on a horse/wagon/track where you’re either on it or off it. In sailing, sometimes winds (surroundings, stress and life in general) are perfect and you can just easily cruise on with full speed. Sometimes the wind dies and you can just float there without having to really even touch the helm, but you’re also not really going anywhere. Sometimes there’s high winds and heavy storms so you have to reef in your sails and steering even remotely to where you want to go is a challenge. Sometimes it’s so stormy you just have to stay in the port and wait it out.

For me, more stress means more winds. I need some wind to keep my boat moving, but if there’s too much or too little the boat either barely moves or the sailing gets so rocky that manouvering is difficult and it takes all my might to just keep the boat safely afloat. This is why I sometimes just go to the port and sit out the storms without making any attempts other than maintenance and sanity.

This sailing boat analogy was sort of a mini epiphany for me while writing this, so I hope you got any sense out of it.

*Technically not all my life, since I was born in November and my first sailing season didn’t start until May when I was 6 months old.

Klmom123

I lost 15 pounds 3 years ago with mfp. Felt awesome. Slowly the weight crept back on. Until it was all back. Stress was a factor. Now my new goal is 10 pounds. I think the 15 was too thin and to difficult to maintain. 6 more to go. My issue is once I go back to “normal life” it takes me 2.2 seconds to gain the weight that it took months to take off. I’m not a binge eater , but apparently I am a blind eater. Not paying much attention to the quality of the food I eat.
I’m hoping this time is the final time !

lilmisfit1987

For me, I started nursing school and just slowly slid back into old habits. It was a very slow slide and I could of and should of caught it early, but instead I found myself with the nursing degree plus all the weight I lost and an additional ten pounds. What made me commit to my health again? I see the side effects of obesity every day as an RN. That will not be me!!!!

raspberriliana

hipari wrote: »

I don’t live in the prairie, so I don’t have horses or wagons and I’m not building railroad tracks for myself. That said, I agree with others who cite stress as an obstacle, and instead of a prairie girl I’ve been sailing my entire life.*

I just realized my weight loss mentality analogy is more about steering a sailing boat than being on a horse/wagon/track where you’re either on it or off it. In sailing, sometimes winds (surroundings, stress and life in general) are perfect and you can just easily cruise on with full speed. Sometimes the wind dies and you can just float there without having to really even touch the helm, but you’re also not really going anywhere. Sometimes there’s high winds and heavy storms so you have to reef in your sails and steering even remotely to where you want to go is a challenge. Sometimes it’s so stormy you just have to stay in the port and wait it out.

For me, more stress means more winds. I need some wind to keep my boat moving, but if there’s too much or too little the boat either barely moves or the sailing gets so rocky that manouvering is difficult and it takes all my might to just keep the boat safely afloat. This is why I sometimes just go to the port and sit out the storms without making any attempts other than maintenance and sanity.

This sailing boat analogy was sort of a mini epiphany for me while writing this, so I hope you got any sense out of it.

*Technically not all my life, since I was born in November and my first sailing season didn’t start until May when I was 6 months old.

Great analogy!!


For me, it was overrestricting and obsessing over tracking everything correctly. That got me to a binge eating disorder, which took me two years to tackle.
Now I'm back to tracking, but I'm also trying to be kinder to myself and not miss out on life because of counting calories - I eat whatever I want, I eat out at restaurants, sometimes I go over my calories. And that's okay.

Losingweightforgood2019

52 days in. No relapse

AriannaBier

I am a single mom with a full-time job, and I'm in school part time. I have always been a healthy, active person, but having a child really put the breaks on my weight loss journey (as I had no help). I volunteered at Goodlife in the daycare for 2.5 years, which gave me a free membership and I made friends with some instructors. I felt part of the Goodlife community. However, I had to end my volunteering as I went to school to be a yoga instructor. That was an amazing time of my life. Probably one of the best despite a lot of other stuff happening at the same time. Then I started taking part-time courses at University. I have been so stressed, and so sedentary (I have a desk job and then sit at another desk all evening to study or sit in class), I gained 10 pounds alone in one month. I have never been so heavy in my life (other than that time I was pregnant ) and that alone is enough reason to get me back into it. None of my clothes fit, I don't feel sexy or attractive, I don't take pictures of myself anymore... You will get to a point where you know enough is enough and then get back into it. But remember, it is a life-long journey, not a one-time fix.

Good luck on your journey!

emmies_123

Relapse: Event I was losing weight for came and went, I loosened up my logging (and then completely abandoned it) shortly after. Went like that for 6 months before I realized I'd already put back on 5 lbs and needed to get back on track.

Back on the horse: If I could put on 5 lbs in 6 months I needed to go back to what worked. Switched up my style of exercise so it was less boring/chore-like. Went back to logging my meals faithfully and not letting myself cheat with sweets (one little chocolate won't hurt anything....x4 in a day...)

Also trying to focus on actual fitness this time instead of just the number. I want to gain upper body strength and feel better on my active days. So far I've been going at my own pace and seeing some results. The scale isn't my friend, but I look at myself in the mirror and realize I am feeling so much better about my appearance.

TWRUNNER32

Millicent3015 wrote: »

It's usually depression that causes me to stop eating optimally. I'm too exhausted to prepare and cook food, I stop going out, and I rely on takeaways. I'm hoping that by the time I have another episode (if it happens) my eating behaviour will have changed to the point I gravitate towards healthier options, so that even if I am living on takeaways I find places that do more nutritious food. I won't berate myself for 'falling off the wagon', as that's pointless and you just end up in a vicious cycle of self-recrimination. I'll just get back to eating more optimally as soon as I start to feel better. Then I'll make simple healthier meals that won't overtax my energy, until I'm back to wellness and can prep and cook for myself. There's really no 'messing up', there'll be some times when you're eating nutritiously and some times when you eat less nutritious food. It's human to have setbacks, so I don't dwell on mine, I just do my best to keep going onwards.

This is my issue as well.

Some days, it's legitimately too tiring to even consider cleaning my house, or doing my dishes, or going grocery shopping. I can order a pizza online, and barely have to speak to anyone to get it delivered. Basically, the easiest thing for me is to make sure my apartment is in order, even if it's only keeping the floors cleared. When my environment is out of control, I'm out of control.

gallicinvasion

TWRUNNER32 wrote: »

Millicent3015 wrote: »

It's usually depression that causes me to stop eating optimally. I'm too exhausted to prepare and cook food, I stop going out, and I rely on takeaways. I'm hoping that by the time I have another episode (if it happens) my eating behaviour will have changed to the point I gravitate towards healthier options, so that even if I am living on takeaways I find places that do more nutritious food. I won't berate myself for 'falling off the wagon', as that's pointless and you just end up in a vicious cycle of self-recrimination. I'll just get back to eating more optimally as soon as I start to feel better. Then I'll make simple healthier meals that won't overtax my energy, until I'm back to wellness and can prep and cook for myself. There's really no 'messing up', there'll be some times when you're eating nutritiously and some times when you eat less nutritious food. It's human to have setbacks, so I don't dwell on mine, I just do my best to keep going onwards.

This is my issue as well.

Some days, it's legitimately too tiring to even consider cleaning my house, or doing my dishes, or going grocery shopping. I can order a pizza online, and barely have to speak to anyone to get it delivered. Basically, the easiest thing for me is to make sure my apartment is in order, even if it's only keeping the floors cleared. When my environment is out of control, I'm out of control.

This is exactly how I feel. My feeling of orderliness (with my apartment, with my belongings, with my work tasks) is all linked to how successful I am at healthy food choices. I need organization in order to eat well.

Nadspee

Today is my 170th day of logging and I've lost 34 pounds (with 16 to go to my goal) but last month my parents decided that they're getting a divorce and that has been an enormous test for me. I'd say I had a mini-relapse, but narrowly avoided a full-blown one even when I thought it was imminent. I never missed a day of logging in, but I skipped days of logging meals. I was eating my feelings and didn't want there to be a record of that. I didn't go to the gym for two weeks. The scale was stuck at 203 for seven weeks! Onederland is a big milestone for me, so seeing the scale stall out knowing that I was only 3 measly pounds away for that long has been so infuriating, but I only have myself to blame!

Then it just clicked for me.

There will always be stressful events happening! That's life! Overeating doesn't fix anything! Ice cream and chocolate and sugar are delicious but also don't fix anything. Ordering delivery is easier but it doesn't actually make me happier. No amount of eating will fix my parents! LOL! I realized that I don't have control over what's happening with my family, but I always have control over my own choices and actions. My own health is my top priority now, mental and physical. I've have to remind myself all day long, every single day, since my parents split, to put my health first. Honestly, everything in life will try to derail you from taking care of yourself, but we have to fight that. Say no. Set boundaries. Rather than indulging my parents and becoming emotionally entangled, I've been focusing the attention that they'd like me to be giving them, on tending to myself. That has been making all the difference in keeping me sane and getting back on track! Today I'm at 201 and I know that when I finally hit 199 I'm going to be even more proud of myself, because if I can keep it up when life gets hard, then I know I can do it when things are easier again! Hoping to find my way to Onederland by the end of the week!