Goal weight criticized
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I've pushed back on this. From these conversations, it seems the theory is that because we're old, we're gonna get sick; and when we get sick, we're gonna lose weight; and if we lose weight while thin, we'll starve to death (or at least to worse illness) much faster. Or something like that. <eye roll>
Subjectively, seems like it's most often been said to me by someone who prefers to be at a little higher weight, and prefers not to be very active, now that they're around the same age I am (62), so their happy and sustainable calorie balance is at a higher weight than it was when they were 19. I'll let them do them, and place their own health bets on the weight they prefer. I'll do likewise.
I have no idea what having children has to do with it; no one brings that part up with me, because I don't have any.5 -
Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
The thing is, "You would have to roll me down the street," is a touchy phrase. It's an insensitive and insulting thing to say, right up there with: "Shoot me if I ever look like that."I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol.
No one said that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds. They said that the average American woman is 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 168.5 lbs.Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic!
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Show them this. It covers all age groups, and your goal weight is in all age groups for your height.
http://jeffreycollins.us/height-weight-age-chart/height-weight-age-chart-awesome-11-height-weight-age-chart/
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conniemaxwell5 wrote: »Show them this. It covers all age groups, and your goal weight is in all age groups for your height.
http://jeffreycollins.us/height-weight-age-chart/height-weight-age-chart-awesome-11-height-weight-age-chart/
Anyone else clicked this link and been taken to a virus warning scam site?
Cheers, h.1 -
middlehaitch wrote: »conniemaxwell5 wrote: »Show them this. It covers all age groups, and your goal weight is in all age groups for your height.
http://jeffreycollins.us/height-weight-age-chart/height-weight-age-chart-awesome-11-height-weight-age-chart/
Anyone else clicked this link and been taken to a virus warning scam site?
Cheers, h.
It was weird -- my organization's IT graphics came up, but I didn't get a warning. I didn't see any source for the data in the graphic, though -- like, there's normal BMI, but it didn't say where the "ideal" column came from -- and the bottom text wasn't well thought out, so I just figured it was a junk science site.4 -
If you look at the various charts for weight based on height (Robinson, Miller, Devine, & Hamwi) and average them out, you get 154.875 lbs. Calculating my weight based on the highest possible normal BMI would be ~163 lbs. I'm down ~86 pounds (I've got about 56 to go), and people have told me to stop because I'm too thin even though my BMI is 31.4 which is still considered overweight. I just tell them that I'll see how I look/feel when I get close to my goal.1
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Or just say you'll know when you're finished losing when you like the way your clothes fit. Case closed.3
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Heck I couldn't stick to the weight I wanted - just too hungry to maintain so few calories! But if people can do it, good for them! What matters is having realistic expectations and find a weight that YOU are comfortable with.1
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Busy bodies ... Ignore them.0
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Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
The thing is, "You would have to roll me down the street," is a touchy phrase. It's an insensitive and insulting thing to say, right up there with: "Shoot me if I ever look like that."I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol.
No one said that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds. They said that the average American woman is 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 168.5 lbs.Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic!
That should wake people up, that's not a healthy BMI.9 -
Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
The thing is, "You would have to roll me down the street," is a touchy phrase. It's an insensitive and insulting thing to say, right up there with: "Shoot me if I ever look like that."I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol.
No one said that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds. They said that the average American woman is 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 168.5 lbs.Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic!
That should wake people up, that's not a healthy BMI.
If they're here, reading your charming fat shaming bs, they're probably aware of that already.23 -
Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
The thing is, "You would have to roll me down the street," is a touchy phrase. It's an insensitive and insulting thing to say, right up there with: "Shoot me if I ever look like that."I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol.
No one said that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds. They said that the average American woman is 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 168.5 lbs.Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic!
That should wake people up, that's not a healthy BMI.
And people already know that. No one's claiming it's healthy or a normal weight. It's *average*.
13 -
Yes, I got the same things as @collectingblues got.collectingblues wrote: »middlehaitch wrote: »conniemaxwell5 wrote: »Show them this. It covers all age groups, and your goal weight is in all age groups for your height.
http://jeffreycollins.us/height-weight-age-chart/height-weight-age-chart-awesome-11-height-weight-age-chart/
Anyone else clicked this link and been taken to a virus warning scam site?
Cheers, h.
It was weird -- my organization's IT graphics came up, but I didn't get a warning. I didn't see any source for the data in the graphic, though -- like, there's normal BMI, but it didn't say where the "ideal" column came from -- and the bottom text wasn't well thought out, so I just figured it was a junk science site.
0 -
(I guess you Edited To Add the bolded after I posted my initial response.)Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol. Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic! Get offended if you want, it is a diet forum.
Thank you. I accept your invitation. (aside to anyone who hasn't already guessed: Rant Follows.)
*Kitten* yeah, I'm offended.
Sure, this is a diet forum, but it's meant to be a helpful and supportive one. It is not meant to be a place where someone who's never had a BMI higher than 26 gets to parrot the sort of fat-shaming slurs yelled out of car windows, chanted on school playgrounds, and stage-whispered over shoulders in Middle School Girls' Restrooms without the risk of someone suggesting that she might have been a bit tactless.
You used a phrase commonly invoked to insult fat people, but that's not what offended me. What's offensive is that, when I used every grain of tact at my disposal to suggest that your remark may itself have been tactless, you did not do what a reasonable person might and post something like: "Oh, dear. I didn't realize that. I'm sorry if I seemed insensitive."
Those are not hard words to type. They're all fairly easy to spell. They don't cost you anything monetarily, and none of them have any Calories.
But you chose instead to tell me not to be so touchy, to defend your statement in a way that would only make sense if "average" meant the same thing as "normal," and to dismiss your responsibility for any offense you might have caused.
I found your earlier remark slightly insensitive, but not offensive. I said so as tactfully as I could, and it is your defensive and dismissive response that offends the *kitten* out of me.
22 -
Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
(I guess you Edited To Add the bolded after I posted my initial response.)Evelyn_Gorfram wrote: »
Um, you're like, aware that some of the people reading this probably are 5'4" women who might currently weigh that much or even more, right? And that, especially given that they're here to address their weight-related problems, your last remark might seem kind of tactless? I realize that this thread is about skinny-shaming, but that doesn't cancel out any fat-shaming.Packerjohn wrote: »I typed this out once and it disappeared, sorry if it’s repost. My goal weight has been criticized three times this week. I want to weigh in the 130’s. I am 5’4”. One person goal weight is much higher than mine at same height, one said I should be satisfied at 150 even though they are 135 at 5’7’. Another said because I have children and am older I should be satisfied w a higher weight. I feel like that is selling myself short. Do they want me to stay fat ? And for what reason? They said not when I asked, just said 130s is too low and skinny. Grrr!
Well hon, 140 isn't fat, depending on your bone structure. HAVING SAID THAT you seem to have a realistic goal at 130. If people have issues with that, then its on them, not you. Unless your doctor tells you that's too light, then you don't need to worry. Five-four is average height and women in that group generally weigh between 115-135 (according to one report I read). So no worries! You focus on your goal and good luck to you!
Not according to the CDC:
American women aged 20 years and above weigh an average of 168.5 pounds (lbs), according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Height-wise, the average adult female is 5 feet 4 inches, and her waist measures 38.1
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321003.php
Omg I can't imagine how much I would have to eat to weigh 168!!!! You would be literally rolling me down the street. At my heaviest , eating tons of junk food I was 140's! That's more than my husband weighs and he's much taller than me.
I said for ME personally. Don't be so touchy lol. Saying that all 5'4 women should be around 170 pounds is ridiculous. I would not be healthy at that weight or comfortable. That was in response to someone saying 130 is the average for a 5'4 women, which is much more realistic! Get offended if you want, it is a diet forum.
Thank you. I accept your invitation. (aside to anyone who hasn't already guessed: Rant Follows.)
*Kitten* yeah, I'm offended.
Sure, this is a diet forum, but it's meant to be a helpful and supportive one. It is not meant to be a place where someone who's never had a BMI higher than 26 gets to parrot the sort of fat-shaming slurs yelled out of car windows, chanted on school playgrounds, and stage-whispered over shoulders in Middle School Girls' Restrooms without the risk of someone suggesting that she might have been a bit tactless.
You used a phrase commonly invoked to insult fat people, but that's not what offended me. What's offensive is that, when I used every grain of tact at my disposal to suggest that your remark may itself have been tactless, you did not do what a reasonable person might and post something like: "Oh, dear. I didn't realize that. I'm sorry if I seemed insensitive."
Those are not hard words to type. They're all fairly easy to spell. They don't cost you anything monetarily, and none of them have any Calories.
But you chose instead to tell me not to be so touchy, to defend your statement in a way that would only make sense if "average" meant the same thing as "normal," and to dismiss your responsibility for any offense you might have caused.
I found your earlier remark slightly insensitive, but not offensive. I said so as tactfully as I could, and it is your defensive and dismissive response that offends the *kitten* out of me.
Q.F.T.
Y'know, in my younger days, when I was more prone to showing my mean girl streak and being completely oblivious to the fact I was being an insensitive *kitten* (or just not caring), I used to say and think things like that too. Then I actually got overweight. It was humbling...18
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