Funny stuff kids say

markindia5135

So, me and my 6 year old son went to the garage to get the Christmas tree out to set up. We both happened to have our shirts off. As we both were carrying the tree inside the house my son looks at me and say "dad, I don't have any belly muscle but you have a lot of belly muscle."😂 thanks kids! Now I need to go to the gym.

Any funny things your kids have said during your fitness goal process?

Mark

back_in_black

"Hey mister, there's no candy in here!"

Sunshine_And_Sand

Last year one our elves pooped out some chocolate chips and his sister put a "diaper" made of toilet paper on him.
My son, 5 at that time told me that the elf didn't really poop but instead stole some of our chocolate to use for his tricks. When asked how he knew the elf didn't poop, he said that the elves (elf on the shelf) "can't poop bc they don't have a butt crack".

funjen1972

My daughter was 2 years old and 5i was pregnant with her brother. We were talking about growing bigger. Her arms were growing, she was getting taller, etc. We talked about how my baby belly was growing bigger and she says 'and your butt is growing'. Oh my!

Sunshine_And_Sand

Sorry that had nothing to do with fitness, I just thought it was funny and only read the headline 😬.

markindia5135

Still a great story. The other day i bent over to put the Christmas lights up and the same kid told me "pull your pants up daddy"

JeepHair77

When my daughter was about 4, she informed me that she wanted a bong for her birthday.

A "bong"?

Yes, a bong.

You're saying "bong?"

Yes. Bong.

With a "b"? "BONG?"

[exasperated at her stupid mother] YES! A BONG!

A bong?

Yeah! You bang on it and it goes "B-O-O-O-O-N-G-G-G!"

JeepHair77

Oh, and here's another one, appropriate for this time of year, from when she was in kindergarten, I think.

[singing]

"Jingle Bells
Batman Smells
Robert laid an egg!"

go_cubs

My nephews are 3 and 6 and their papi smokes cigars
So one day I gave them those big pretzel sticks as a snack and next thing I know they got there legs crossed and they’re puffing the pretzel I ask what are you doing?! They said smoking a stoogie
🤦🏻‍♀️😂

tcunbeliever

My favorite kid-isms

viola sausages (vienna sausages)

acne puncture (acupuncture)

mango oranges (mandarin oranges)

the blue himalayas (the blue ridge mountains)

Not fitness related, but still cute.

markindia5135

This doesn't really have anything to do with fitness but my 9 yr old daughter asked me last night if we can rent a movie on iTunes and I told her no. She immediately rolled her eyes and threw her head back and said "why is my family so cheap?" I started busting up laughing!

Any other funny stories kids say?

Sunshine_And_Sand

When my oldest was little and I was pregnant with my youngest, she was at the stage where she always wanted to help. At around 8 months pregnant I was giving her jobs that kept me from having to bend down. She always got the laundry out of the dryer for me and put it in the basket.
One day after bible class, one of the teachers told me they were talking to the kids about obeying parents and helping out with chores. DD apparently raised her hand and told the class that she has to do the laundry "because Mommy is too fat to bend down".

Rivers2k

We were looking at old pictures and my youngest (5) asked "where was I"? My wife said you where in mommy's belly. And he said "yeah but I found my way out".

Fitness related my middle boy said he wanted a big belly so he can be strong like daddy.

When my daughter was 3 I would always say "don't test me". She also knew she wasn't supposed to touch the blinds. I come into the kitchen and she was standing up on a chair, holding onto the window blind, looks me dead in the eye, and says "daddy I test you" Luckily she has grown into a sweet daddies girl that doesn't like to test me but at the moment I was scared for my future.

shaf238

Little sister to my mum: your hands are cold because it takes longer for the heat to get inside the crinkles

Rivers2k

oh yeah I took them to an art gallery to see a Japanese art exhibit. My boys where standing in front of a picture whispering and giggling to each other. I ask what they are laughing at? The picture was of Sumo wrestlers and the youngest says daddy it looks like you. He knew it didn't he was just being a little jerk. They had a good laugh over that.

BrettWithPKU

Daughter's 1 year+5 days old so, so she's not saying much yet.
But she does say "Hey Dad" to get both my attention and her mother's. Seems both of us are 'dad'.

JeepHair77

BDonjon wrote: »

Daughter's 1 year+5 days old so, so she's not saying much yet.
But she does say "Hey Dad" to get both my attention and her mother's. Seems both of us are 'dad'.

LOL! Just wait. When mine was littler, and repeating "Mommy! Mommy! MOMMY!" over and over didn't get my attention, she'd call me by my first name.

Well, actually, she still does that. But it's not as cute at 13.

megleighd

My daughter is three now, but when she just turned two she dropped something at the store, stopped, and said "Oh shi, I'll get it".

When my step son was 6, after using the portapotty he came to me and asked why there was chili in there.

markindia5135

These are awesome! I'm rolling! Keep them coming!

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Vikka_V

Cousins 3 year old daughter
"where's my fuucckking iPad"

slimgirljo15

My daughter was grocery shopping with me, we were waiting in the checkout line and a fairly large lady was standing in front of us.
Loudly my 3 year old daughter said "look at the big bum mum" and slapped the ladies butt.. I wish the floor could have opened up and swallowed me. Yes, she did get a lecture for it. Luckily the lady laughed.

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rdevol

My husband had my daughter out somewhere in public. He had to use the bathroom, and she said "Make sure you wash your hands if you touch your vagina, Daddy!"

Mr_Healthy_Habits

Once when I was like 4, I was on the phone with my father's family and they asked why we haven't come over to visit in a while...

To which I replied...

Because my mommy don't like you guys 🤷🏽‍♂️...

Hahaha!
We laughed about that for years

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Vikka_V

"gross, grossy grossy gross" (meaning the smell)
...A little boy said one day when he came into my place of work (he wasn't wrong)

I say it all the time now, love the phrase!

Sunshine_And_Sand

Was teaching a class of 2-3 year olds at church, and we were talking about being nice. I had a little boy raise his hand and tell me, "You can't be mean when people come to your house."

Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings

I've mentioned it before but I'll mention it again because I find it hilarious... my son got very upset with me when he found out he floated around in amniotic fluid for 9 months... 'how could you do that to me mom?! You didn't even give me a floaty... I could have drown!'

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