Funny stuff kids say

JetJaguar

When my son was about 6, we went to a restaurant that had a sign over the entry that said "Food and Spirits". He asked me if that meant it was haunted.

skctilidie

When my oldest was 4, we were grocery shopping when we came across an older man wearing an eye patch. Cue the excited squeals of “Mom, a real pirate!!!” as he took off running to go meet this man. By the time I caught up to him, he was questioning the (thankfully, seemingly amused) man on where his ship was.

When my 3rd was born, my 2nd was only 19 months old. He was majorly into Thomas the Tank Engine. His baby brother was named James - and it hadn’t occurred to me that there’s a train called James on the show until he was brought in to meet the baby and just kept repeating “Choo choo? Where choo choo? Where choo choo go?” I told him there was no train and his baby brother was James and he looked at me with all the disgust that a tiny, barely verbal toddler can muster and informed me “no baby, choo choo James”.

markindia5135

So I took my kids swimming today and I got in the pool with them. My son, who is 6, was swimming to the bottom of the 12' pool and suggested that I do it then stopped gims of and said "you can't do that because you're too fat and floaty!" Haha! Keeping me motivated!

youngcaseyr

When I was about 3 I was coming inside from the cold with my grandpa and repeadted after him, "Goddamn it's cold out there".

Also, my 2 year old has learned the word fart and will loudly announce when he or anyone else farts around him. He also loves the word big and likes to let us all know ALL of the things that he thinks are big

slessofme

I had a holiday movie on last weekend and the kids sat down to watch a little of it. There are obviously photoshopped pictures at the end. My 11 year old busts out laughing and says "They didn't even have the budget to take photos at the real location!"

funjen1972

When by son was about 4 he wanted to be a 'Sketelon' (skeleton) for Halloween. Also, his favorite food was bikini bread (zucchini bread).

markindia5135

My son told me yesterday after he got in trouble at school for playing when he should not have been playing that “my friend made me get in trouble...I accidentally started playing!” Hahahaha! It was a teachable moment but I couldn’t help but laugh!

yayamom3

When my kids were little, they said ‘frog’ instead of ‘fart’. One Sunday morning at church, an older gentleman sitting near us farted. My 6 year old son looked at me with horror on his face and asked, “Mommy, is that a sin?” My two year old daughter responded, “No, silly. It’s a frog.”

markindia5135

So I put on a jacket I haven’t been able to wear in a while. My oldest daughter (who is 9) says to me “I like that jacket, good thing you can fit in it now!” Haha!😂

GoodLardy

funjen1972 wrote: »

When by son was about 4 he wanted to be a 'Sketelon' (skeleton) for Halloween. Also, his favorite food was bikini bread (zucchini bread).

Cute. My daughter always wants us to put on our zucchinis ( bikinis)

markindia5135

So, I finished my first Sprint Triathlon this past weekend and when I was finishing up the bike portion of it my 9yr old daughter yells from the side and asks “Dad, are you in last place?” Me “Yeah”. Hahahaha! I finished though!

sdereski

These are the best!

When my boys were 3 & 5, we had two 18 years old boys staying with us for the summer. After work, they would often take my boys to the beach. One particular day, after swimming, my 3 year old was sitting on the beach, when one of the teenage boys was walking out of the water, my 3 year old say "look, your fur skin is sticking down"...he was referring to the young man's body hair. Needless to say, the young man did a double take look down!

To this day we refer to body hair as "fur skin".

workhardplay85

“Good job daddy you get a treat, and a high five”

I really wish my son would leave me alone when I’m making a “twozie”

chattox

I heard it with my own eyes!
You shouldn’t keep bats, because they are wild animals (I don’t have a bat) she was four when she said it.

Sunshine_And_Sand

After seeing DH jiggle his minuscule amount of belly fat to make him laugh, my 7 year old son said something like, "Daddy, that is so cool, I wanna get fat too so I can do that too."

grace42c

My 16 year old, 6’1” tall, super fit, 8-pack abs son, keeps challenging me to arm wrestling, bench press, or squat contests. Apparently he can’t see that I am 57 and tiny, so when I decline he tells me It is because i am fat or lazy. Funny how he views reality.

StormToday

My 4yo who was 3 at the time called his dad a "little b*tch" and it was probably the best ducking moment of my life.

Unknown

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