finish your plate mentality

jerseygirlmaggie

Same here. The hubs and I grew up eating everything on our plates, especially if we took seconds. When we had kids, the hubs and I agreed to never force our kids to finish the meals on their plates. It's adding calories they don't really need.

I have two healthy (and fit) daughters. We encourage our girls to wait a few minutes before taking seconds (maybe finish their milk or water before taking seconds). I know them well enough to know when they are reaching their maximum and 9 times out of 10 I am correct. But if they do take seconds and eat some and leave some, we don't harp on them about it or make them eat it. On ocassion we do remind them to take smaller seconds because they can always add a little more if they are still hungry (rarely see them eat thirds).

libranpixi

I used to clear my plate (as instructed by my parents as a child) and then my kids plates (when they were a bit younger) when they couldn't eat everything, I never forced them to eat anything and they both have extremely good self control now and stop when they have had enough. I just got bigger lol!!

The past few months I swapped all of my big plates out for much smaller ones and I immediately pack any leftovers that don't fit into the fridge for tomorrow's lunch. It has saved me a fortune, I still clear my (much smaller) plate and my body is finally starting to recognise when it is full and I'm losing weight at last.

I have also started to drink a full glass of water whilst I am cooking so I don't feel as hungry when I sit down to eat.

jerseygirlmaggie

I have also started to drink a full glass of water whilst I am cooking so I don't feel as hungry when I sit down to eat.

Outstanding idea!!!

1longroad

my parents and grandparents (who grew up during the depression) were always 'finish your plate' people. Understandable, when you see where they came from in relation to food, but the problem was that there was always SO much good food, that finishing your plate, meant overeating!

I don't make my grandsons finish their plates, but don't let them mindlessly snack in between their meals either.

glin23

And if we were trying a new food, my mother would put literally one or two bites' worth on my plate, saying, "We're just going to put this much on your plate to see if you like it." So yes, I had to eat that bite or two. But if I didn't like it, that was it, and I could get more of whatever I did like. I think it was a very healthy way to eat (I don't really have problems with overeating) and intend to do that with my kids when I have them.

This is fantastic advice if I ever have kids and even for myself.

b218w

i was brought up with finishing whats on your plate.....but i only put what i wanted and went for seconds if hungry...still do that today(finish my plate and only serve myself what ill actually eat)

RubyRunner14

I understand why people do it (to prevent snacking later), but it's unhealthy both physically and emotionally and kids especially become very ill-feeling when forced to eat. Children know much better than adults when they are full or hungry. Guilt tripping your kid doesn't change the fact that they are hungry or not. You're wasting money and setting your kids up for bad habits.

When I was younger, my parents set a two-cookies-only-for-dessert rule. All desserts were to the top shelf of the cupboard and we had no problems with sweets. Holidays and parties we ate whatever sweets we wanted but we learned quick about the sore stomach... even then we overate sweets because of the availability. But setting limtations within reason I believe is your best option.

Madame_Goldbricker

Always had dog's so leftovers don't even make it as far as the bin nevermind Africa...

My daughter has always eaten/ left as much as she wants. I on the other hand now use a smaller plate so my eyes/brain/belly think I'm getting a far bigger portion than I am :bigsmile:

TinGirl314

My parents definitely were the clean your plate people.
Till I was about 10 and obese.

I think it's a balance. If you make healthy food and give them a reasonable amount, no harm done.
If you take your kids to a restaurant and not get a kids meal and force them to eat it all, or tell them to eat a whole plate of mac n cheese...then I believe it 's hurtful.

So if the house is healthy I don't think it's the problem, but if the whole house has a weight problem, might was to re-evaluate what everyone is getting.

2ht2hand1e

Don't do that to her. If she doesn't finish it, put it in the fridge and reheat it if she's hungry later.

BrendaLee

Let them decide when they're finished, but put it aside for them to have later if they decide they're still hungry. A lot of kids will try to skip out on what's on their plate to get to the good stuff -- desserts, treats.

MyOwnSunshine

I don't understand why parents are so concerned about "snacking" later.

If you're hungry, you should eat. If you are not hungry, you shouldn't be conditioned to eat just to meet someone's approval. If my daughter isn't hungry at mealtime, she can have a healthy snack later. What is the big deal with that?

I also strongly disagree with making dessert a reward for eating when you're not hungry or eating food that doesn't taste good to you. Why reward someone for overeating with a treat, but punish them for eating only until they're satisfied by withholding their treat.

Sounds like a recipe for creating a compulsive eater who is totally disconnected from their appetite and hunger signals, as well as someone who eats mindlessly whether the food tastes good or not.

CallMeCupcakeDammit

My mom used to make me clean my plate. If it wasn't clean by midnight, I got it for breakfast, lunch and dinner the next day until it was gone. I went to school with a bowl of oatmeal dumped on my head one day because I didn't want to finish it. I've only in the last few years gotten past the feeling that I need to clean my plate, and I still struggle with it from time to time, but mostly I'm past it. For that reason, I never made my kids clean their plate, or eat something they didn't want, and neither has a weight problem. I actually envy them for being able to have cookies in the house and not demolish them within 24 hours.

sklarbodds

I do not make my kids finish their plate. I do typically make them eat their veggies or main portion before they have anything like fries or chips or dessert etc. (And I don't let them indulge to much of that either)

jenilla1

I've always finished my plate (unless the food is gross) and I've never been overweight. I think this is because I don't put a crap ton of food on my plate to begin with and I eat very slowly. If, at the end, I'm still hungry, then I go get seconds. If not, I'm done. I generally cook with reasonable serving sizes in mind. We almost never have leftovers or wasted food. I think that whether or not you "clean your plate" should depend on how large a serving you have on it. :drinker:

theycallyoumister

I honestly think this was a generational thing. People had less means to discard or be frivolous with food back then. Yes...it got drilled into you that you were cleaning your plate including licking it.

Eirene80

I was just coming here to see if there were any topics on this!

I was raised to clean my plate and still do. We kids weren't allowed up from the table until we did. There weren't starving kids in China. We were told how hard our dad worked to earn money for our food and that we were wasting it by not eating what was given. I still eat past fullness. Even until I'm in pain at a restaurant, even though I know I can take home the leftovers for the next day. It doesn't matter if it's not on my plate either. If there's a little bit left in the pan that nobody will eat, but not enough to save, I eat it. I get this feeling that I'm a failure and I'm wasting money if I don't.

I don't make my kids clean their plates. I give my kids very small portions and they have to eat all of that if they want a second helping of anything. It's more of an "if you're too full for your asparagus then you're too full for another roll or dessert" thing. I try not to lecture them about wasting money when it comes to food, unless it's to tell them to order a small portion of something when we're out and ask for more if they're still hungry so it doesn't go to waste. (usually they aren't as hungry as they thought)

ViktoryaC

I understand this mentality, was raised by it myself, but I think it IS harmful. Believe it or not, I was an underweight child, usually in like the 3rd percentile for weight. My parents desperately tried to get as much food in me as possible, especially when I was a teen girl always suspected of anorexia. The result---I grew up into one of those thin people with a bottomless appetite who was always snacking. Now I'm 30, my metabolism is gone, I've gained 50 pounds in a year, and I'm still always hungry, always eating, finishing everything put in front of me. I say let the poor little girl eat what she wants, when she wants. If shes gained since coming to live with you, it may be too much food.

megsi474

We tailor portions to the kid and the food being served. If it's not their favorite entree, we'll slip an extra scoop of veggies but err on the side of you can have more if you're still hungry. My oldest would eat his own foot if I served it on his plate, so we have to have him scale back on his seconds because his eyes are bigger than his stomach. He's a beanpole, so weight isn't an issue, more that he doesn't see seconds as another full meal and can't finish it.

ryry_

Yes I think its bad, as it encourages people to eat even when they are not hungry which leads to overreating. Leftover food is not going to starving kids in Africa, its going to the dump to rot. And while I get that world hunger is a real thing and its tragic, its certainly not a problem for most people in developed nations (I said most. I realize there are also hungry people everywhere), and unless those starving children are willing to trade leftover food for diabetes medication, its not a good practice in my opinion.