Do people wait for love/intimacy?

2

Replies

  • Versicolour
    Versicolour Posts: 7,164 Member
    1sphere wrote: »
    JustReadTheInstructions wrote: »
    Let me tell you what real life is like. The men dry up, and the nights get lonely.
    Nowadays real life is worse thanks to social media. Dark perverted a-holes are all over the internet messaging girls daily. Some women on twitter exposed the kind of dm's they were getting.
    I just hope there are still a lot of real people out there.

    That makes two of us. Not many in my age group and geographical range though, that's for sure
  • RhiAnLewis17
    RhiAnLewis17 Posts: 2,299 Member
    Whenever I think about Catherine Tate I ways remember Nan. That's just who she is fo ever.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,864 Member
    JustReadTheInstructions wrote: »
    Let me tell you what real life is like. The men dry up, and the nights get lonely. The only calls on your machine are for collection agencies about that pair of motorcycle boots you never even wore.

    You stalk your old high school boyfriend online, go to his daughter's soccer games, and make a scene.

    You buy a diamond ring for yourself, wear it on your right hand, and tell yourself, *you're all you need*.

    One day, you're alone, tired. At your feet, a dying bird. But where did it come from? Why did you kill it? Is it because in some strange way it is you?

    Absolutely *kitten* *kittenkittening* right.

    You didn’t like the bird?
  • BigD06
    BigD06 Posts: 130 Member
    They do...but don't have enough common sense or communication skills to understand if it's genuine or not....the world is full of really dumb adults....
  • magnusthenerd
    magnusthenerd Posts: 1,207 Member
    JeromeBarry1 wrote: »
    Anyone want to talk about oxytocin?

    It appears to me all the rationalizing of relationships goes out the window when the hormones speak.

    I'd put the explanation more on dopamine than oxytocin.
  • Rogalina16
    Rogalina16 Posts: 71 Member
    Love sucks😂😂😂 I'm just over here loving myself!
  • amorfati601070
    amorfati601070 Posts: 2,861 Member
    edited February 2019
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    I think a lot of people are denial about whether they do this, but it's definitely a thing. I'd rather be alone than in a dysfunctional relationship. e97epde1mh28.jpg

    Yes, it's people that are afraid of commitment. They wont even give the relationship a proper chance. As soon as there is conflict they just bail. But it's true, conflict ( and resolution)makes bonds stronger. It takes two to tango my amigo.
  • RhiAnLewis17
    RhiAnLewis17 Posts: 2,299 Member
    amorfati601070 wrote: »
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    I think a lot of people are denial about whether they do this, but it's definitely a thing. I'd rather be alone than in a dysfunctional relationship. e97epde1mh28.jpg

    Yes, it's people that are afraid of commitment. They wont even give the relationship a proper chance. As soon as there is conflict they just bail. But it's true, conflict ( and resolution)makes bonds stronger. It takes two to tango my amigo.

    Undoubtedly, the partnership is imperative. I'm casting no judgement on the parties involved, but if one person is not committed to the relationship they are less likely to compromise or negotiate.
  • amorfati601070
    amorfati601070 Posts: 2,861 Member
    edited February 2019
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    amorfati601070 wrote: »
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    I think a lot of people are denial about whether they do this, but it's definitely a thing. I'd rather be alone than in a dysfunctional relationship. e97epde1mh28.jpg

    Yes, it's people that are afraid of commitment. They wont even give the relationship a proper chance. As soon as there is conflict they just bail. But it's true, conflict ( and resolution)makes bonds stronger. It takes two to tango my amigo.

    Undoubtedly, the partnership is imperative. I'm casting no judgement on the parties involved, but if one person is not committed to the relationship they are less likely to compromise or negotiate.

    Yeah but I also think like in the early days of a relationship things are exciting and there’s this electricity. Once that wanes and one of the parties (usually the man) starts to I dunno... get bored for lack of better words and they just crave that excitement from they get from a new partner. I think this is at the core of a lot of affairs. I am certain that there is chemistry at the atomic level responsible too. A surge in dopamine and oxytocin during the early lusty days.
  • Versicolour
    Versicolour Posts: 7,164 Member
    edited February 2019
    I think I set my standards too high. I am doomed to be alone forever barring an act of divine intervention. But if that's what it takes, at least I know the next time will be the right one. I will not lower my standards again. I deserve more, and so do my children
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    There's no one way to do it. If you're one who prefers to take things slow, then maybe it would be better for you to seek out someone of the same preference.
  • RhiAnLewis17
    RhiAnLewis17 Posts: 2,299 Member
    amorfati601070 wrote: »
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    amorfati601070 wrote: »
    RhiAnLewis17 wrote: »
    I think a lot of people are denial about whether they do this, but it's definitely a thing. I'd rather be alone than in a dysfunctional relationship. e97epde1mh28.jpg

    Yes, it's people that are afraid of commitment. They wont even give the relationship a proper chance. As soon as there is conflict they just bail. But it's true, conflict ( and resolution)makes bonds stronger. It takes two to tango my amigo.

    Undoubtedly, the partnership is imperative. I'm casting no judgement on the parties involved, but if one person is not committed to the relationship they are less likely to compromise or negotiate.

    Yeah but I also think like in the early days of a relationship things are exciting and there’s this electricity. Once that wanes and one of the parties (usually the man) starts to I dunno... get bored for lack of better words and they just crave that excitement from they get from a new partner. I think this is at the core of a lot of affairs. I am certain that there is chemistry at the atomic level responsible too. A surge in dopamine and oxytocin during the early lusty days.

    Yes, you're probably right, when the excitement and novelty of a relationship wears off one partner usually withdraws. This might lead the other partner to chase.... And depending on how desperate they are to maintain the relationship they will compromise more than what makes them happy. It really depends on the commitment of both parties to the actual relationship though. A lot of the time people have high expectations for how perfect the relationship is going to be and when reality sets in it becomes too difficult to maintain.

    And, yes I think you are right about affairs. There is an addictive element to the initial infatuation stage, which is probably why people either; embark upon affairs or become serial monogamists. Chemistry has a huge impact I'm sure, our bodies are looking for the ideal candidate for reproduction and release hormones that compromise our ability to rationalise.
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,325 Member
    Versicolour wrote: »
    I think I set my standards too high. I am doomed to be alone forever barring an act of divine intervention. But if that's what it takes, at least I know the next time will be the right one. I will not lower my standards again. I deserve more, and so do my children

    im w you. ill never lower my standards again and im ok w being alone as opposed to being mistreated or coupling w a squatter (someone who works hard to simply become the center of your world - literally sitting in the middle of your couch w technology in their hand while every one else has to live AROUND them. and their posturing. body language alone drives everyone you love away...ugh ugh ugh)
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Versicolour wrote: »
    I think I set my standards too high. I am doomed to be alone forever barring an act of divine intervention. But if that's what it takes, at least I know the next time will be the right one. I will not lower my standards again. I deserve more, and so do my children

    Honestly, I dont think anyone's standards are too high. They tend to be intune with each person's individual wants and needs. And those things change and evolve over time, but the core standards stay the same.

    I will never "lower" my standards. There are specific qualities and personality traits I look for and I wont compromise on them. If I dont find them, so be it. But like you, I won't change them just to be with someone. I have no fear of being alone. I am quite comfortable being single.
    💖💖
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,325 Member
    Bucknutz247 wrote: »
    She did not pay me. Just a favor for a friend of a friend

    then tell her to hire you or another pi. its in her best interest. o:)

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