Going to the gym

Jenna__XoXo

I recently joined a gym that I really like going to and working out. The problem is I only like going if I have someone with me. I only have a few friends who go to that gym and out schedules don't always match up to go together. I feel uncomfortable going by myself because it's almost always full of only guys and I also don't like going alone because I'm still new at working out and I don't know what I'm doing without being told. I watch workout videos on YouTube but I still feel lost when I walk in the gym. I thought about getting a personal trainer but I don't have the extra money to do that long term. Would I be better off to get one just for one month? How did you guys get comfortable working out alone?

MichelleWithMoxie

I actually feel more anxious and uncomfortable if I go to the gym with someone. I much prefer going alone, doing my thing, and then I’m out. I get a much better workout when I go solo, and I don’t have to worry about anyone else. You’ll get used to it after a bit, and will probably end up liking it better.

runnermom419

jennamburchette2014 wrote: »

I recently joined a gym that I really like going to and working out. The problem is I only like going if I have someone with me. I only have a few friends who go to that gym and out schedules don't always match up to go together. I feel uncomfortable going by myself because it's almost always full of only guys and I also don't like going alone because I'm still new at working out and I don't know what I'm doing without being told. I watch workout videos on YouTube but I still feel lost when I walk in the gym. I thought about getting a personal trainer but I don't have the extra money to do that long term. Would I be better off to get one just for one month? How did you guys get comfortable working out alone?

I realized that no one was watching or caring about what I did at the gym. My reasons to go outweighed the excuses not to go.

I've outlasted every single person who said they'd go to the gym with me. And it's a great feeling.

JBanx256

I honestly prefer working out alone, or, for example, if my husband goes to the gym with me, we do our own things (but will gladly spot one another or offer form corrections/cues etc).

As far as finding a workout buddy...is there a message board or FB group for your gym? You may be able to post a quick, "hey, looking for a gym friend for accountability and fun getting in shape - normally train Mon/Wed/Fri at 6pm but flexible on schedule" or something like that? Or even a local Meetup may be a good place to search? If your gym offers group classes you're interested in, that may not be a bad way to meet others who are into the same stuff as you too or at least familiarize yourself with some of the people who are there a lot, so even if you go in to work out by yourself, you still recognize people and feel like you've got some camaraderie?

A few sessions with a personal trainer may help you feel more comfortable though, so worth at least looking into, especially if it's comfortably in your budget.

MikePTY

The person who is most interested in what you are doing in the gym is you. Everyone else is busy in their own stuff.

If you want to go the personal training route, work with one for a few sessions to set up a routine for you and show you how to do it. Then you can repeat that on your own from there.

sijomial

Something I did for my daughter who had the same confidence issues...….

I set her up with a simple routine that had flexibility on the order of exercise and also equipment used (sub dumbbells for barbell, sub a machine for free weights as examples). It allowed her to "fake it until she made it" with no standing around wondering what to do next and thinking (erroneously!) that everyone was watching her.

A PT could do the same for you perhaps?
(Do have a clear idea about what your goals are - give them something to work with or you just get an off the shelf routine that might not be what you really want.)
One set up session and a couple of weeks later a form check perhaps?

You gain confidence by actually doing it and hopefully you realise after a while it's just a room with some equipment and some people in it - neither are really scary.

stephtran1992

I used to be the same - and sometimes I still feel this way. But go in there with a plan and check things off of your list. It'll help you stay focused and grounded.

ritzvin

jennamburchette2014 wrote: »

I recently joined a gym that I really like going to and working out. The problem is I only like going if I have someone with me. I only have a few friends who go to that gym and out schedules don't always match up to go together. I feel uncomfortable going by myself because it's almost always full of only guys and I also don't like going alone because I'm still new at working out and I don't know what I'm doing without being told. I watch workout videos on YouTube but I still feel lost when I walk in the gym. I thought about getting a personal trainer but I don't have the extra money to do that long term. Would I be better off to get one just for one month? How did you guys get comfortable working out alone?

There's a sticky post in the bodybuilding forum with information on various programs - pick one and it will tell you what to do. Some will also have good descriptions and diagrams on how to do the individual exercises. It'll be less uncomfortable with a plan.

middlehaitch

Another who likes working out alone.

I found a programme I liked, practiced the moves at home using a broom stick, then went to the gym to implement it. Everything was written down in a note book, you could do this with any videos you like too.

I also, like @sijomial (above) did for his daughter, had alternates using machine or dumbbells. The 45lbs barbell was too heavy for anything but deadlifts initially.

You may find this link interesting as it gives a few alternatives.

https://bodyrecomposition.com/muscle-gain/beginning-weight-training-part-4.html/

Here is the list of programmes mentioned above.
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10332083/which-lifting-program-is-the-best-for-you/p1

Cheers, h.

MarvinsFitLife

Just sign up for a female only gym

bobsburgersfan

I don't need a workout buddy, but I do classes so I'm told what to do. I'd probably feel very similar to you if I was lifting weights or using the machines; I have no clue what I'm doing outside of a classroom. I agree that having a few sessions with a trainer might help you get more comfortable.

RunnerGrl1982

jennamburchette2014 wrote: »

I recently joined a gym that I really like going to and working out. The problem is I only like going if I have someone with me. I only have a few friends who go to that gym and out schedules don't always match up to go together. I feel uncomfortable going by myself because it's almost always full of only guys and I also don't like going alone because I'm still new at working out and I don't know what I'm doing without being told. I watch workout videos on YouTube but I still feel lost when I walk in the gym. I thought about getting a personal trainer but I don't have the extra money to do that long term. Would I be better off to get one just for one month? How did you guys get comfortable working out alone?

Have you tried just going one day, and just speaking with a trainer, like a consultation or even someone who simply works there and is familiar with the place? Maybe, they could just have a conversation to get you familiarized with equipment or any questions that you may have. That is what they are there for, they want you to use their gym and equipment, so I'm sure they'd be willing to explain some things to you without too much hassle. Perhaps that could put your mind at ease about not knowing exactly what to do and make you feel more comfortable when going in the future.

You don't even have to go in for a workout, literally just go in and start asking questions and explain a bit what you're looking to do - provide some background, etc..

Might be worth a shot.

BigQ76

I've been going on and off as well, I know my way around the gym but I'm still very self conscious about it.

knightreader

i, too, actually prefer to work out alone. started going to gym with my son, had to show him a few things in first few sessions but now we work out separately. i followed a few videos on line about which exercises to do and form and stuff. never saw a trainer as i knew i'd be suckered in to more sessions i couldn't afford, but if you have strong will power that might be a way to go. good luck.

kshama2001

jennamburchette2014 wrote: »

I recently joined a gym that I really like going to and working out. The problem is I only like going if I have someone with me. I only have a few friends who go to that gym and out schedules don't always match up to go together. I feel uncomfortable going by myself because it's almost always full of only guys and I also don't like going alone because I'm still new at working out and I don't know what I'm doing without being told. I watch workout videos on YouTube but I still feel lost when I walk in the gym. I thought about getting a personal trainer but I don't have the extra money to do that long term. Would I be better off to get one just for one month? How did you guys get comfortable working out alone?

Every gym I've ever joined had 1-3 sessions with a personal trainer for free with membership. Just a handful of sessions and you should be much more comfortable at the gym by yourself. Many gyms also have small group classes for free or really cheap.

I worked out with my now ex-husband way back in the day but since then have just preferred working out by myself.

I hate crowded gyms so go at off hours like right before close or whenever that particular gym is not crowded. It's not always when I prefer to go, but I'd rather adjust my schedule than deal with a crowded gym.

jlynnm70

I have a fitness room at my apartment - actually pretty nice. There is a weight machine in there - if I can figure out the settings....I have a couple figured out (bench press/leg press) - free weights - barbells, dumbells - so it's nice that there are free weights IF I can figure it out. I try to sneak down when no one is there so I don't look dumb trying to move the position of the seats and stuff. When the room is packed (last night after work there was 10 people in there) Then I try to use an elliptical or go in the GYM and shoot the basketball or smack a racquetball against the wall - that will make a 1/2 hour of cardio go really fast!

I get really self conscious because my apartment has a TON of professional aged students (ie. the med/dental/law school kids) since I am literally 4 blocks from campus. Honestly - I kind of try to watch what some of them do - not stare - but glance over to see what they are doing.

If I had the money I'd hire a trainer to come show me how to use 1/2 the stuff and give me a routine....but I don't. My boss offered to come over after work a day and show me some stuff - which will be nice when he has time (I literally live across the street from work). He's also encouraged me with the Free Yoga we have at the office - so if I'm gone a little too long at lunch and that's where I am - it's all good. He knows I've been through a lot lately with a separation from my husband, moving and all that - so he is super supportive of anything I do for ME right now.

MarvinsAMartian

I used to feel uncomfortable working out alone too. I think most of us go thru that initially. For me it had to do with just feeling out of place and lost as far as what to do because I really didn't know what I was doing to be honest.

What helped was just mentally hyping myself up and acting like I belonged. I would be friendly and outgoing which is difficult cause I'm naturally a quiet guy. It helped me "own the space" so to speak.

I eventually made friends in the gym just by saying hi all the time and asking questions when I see an exercise I'd like to try. I found most people are more than willing to help.

Might work for you, might not. Just adding my two pennies.