Help needed from Moms (or Dads!) of tween/teenage girls!

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Will_Thrust_For_Candy
Will_Thrust_For_Candy Posts: 6,109 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hi All!

I am a mom to a wonderful 9 1/2 (going on 19!) year old daughter.

She has recently discovered that she has gotten armpit hair and is absolutely devastated!

Of course I have given her the pep talk.....that is completely normal and happens to all girls and blah blah blah but she is still so upset. She feels like everyone is staring at her if she puts her hand up or does anything where she has to raise her arms.

Obviously I can teach her to shave.....but I'm wondering if that is the best thing to do.

I am considering waxing or laser. But I'm worried that she is too young? Obviously waxing is not exactly pain free, but she has such a little amount! What I would give for my mom to have taken me to have my pits done when I was young.

Thoughts?

Thanks in advance!
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Replies

  • Bonneylynne
    Bonneylynne Posts: 9
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    Personally, I think she's too young for laser & waxing. If it bothers her that much, I'd let her go ahead and shave. Try to stay away from deodarents with aluminum, especially after shaving :o) Good luck, I have a 15 year old girl (*sigh*)
  • Will_Thrust_For_Candy
    Will_Thrust_For_Candy Posts: 6,109 Member
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    Actually I just considered that maybe I should just trim it for her. The hair is quite long, but there isn't much of it. Maybe that would be better for now, rather than starting on a shaving (or alternate) regime :ohwell:
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
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    Personally, I think she's too young for laser & waxing. If it bothers her that much, I'd let her go ahead and shave. Try to stay away from deodarents with aluminum, especially after shaving :o) Good luck, I have a 15 year old girl (*sigh*)

    I agree. When my daughter started sprouting hair in strange places, she got the talk, her own razors & shaving gel, deodorant, etc.
    She's 23 now :smile:

    ETA: waxing is painful & laser?....why?....It is a very normal thing to have armpit hair. One needs to walk a razor's edge & not give the child the impression that this is something that needs to be 'cured.' Lest she starts to get the idea that every perceived imperfection marks her as abnormal or imperfect. At 9 yrs old, kids these days seem to keenly grab onto any notion that they might be abnormal. :ohwell:

    Just don't make a big deal of it :drinker:
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
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    Actually I just considered that maybe I should just trim it for her. The hair is quite long, but there isn't much of it. Maybe that would be better for now, rather than starting on a shaving (or alternate) regime :ohwell:

    lolwut. :laugh:
    It's one hair :ohwell: :blushing: awwwww. That's cute as hell. If trimming it off will work, definately...go for it :drinker:
  • Jennloella
    Jennloella Posts: 2,286 Member
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    laser hurts as well, and she will just have to have it done again as she sprouts more. I don't blame her for being embarrassed, whats the reason you don't want her to just shave? I would have been devastated if my Mother hadn't let me shave....
  • LeviLeDoux
    LeviLeDoux Posts: 151 Member
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    Waxing and lasers might be a little extreme. If she's uncomfortable with it, get her a wire wrapped razor and some shaving gel.
  • Will_Thrust_For_Candy
    Will_Thrust_For_Candy Posts: 6,109 Member
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    Oh no, it's more than one hair.....

    And it's not that she should be ashamed of it by any means....it's that it's a pain the *kitten* quite frankly. That's the only reason I considered waxing and or laser. Honestly shaving my armpits is the biggest inconvenience and for me it's just not pleasant. Mine have gotten scarred over the years and just don't ever have a nice clean shaven look and/or feel....

    so while some of you may think it's ridiculous, I'm really just considering long term for her....nothing else.

    And it's also not that I am against her shaving, it's just that she is young.....so yeah, shaving sucks and why start early if there is an alternate solution.

    Definitely regretting this posting right now :ohwell:
  • djthom2
    djthom2 Posts: 63 Member
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    I started my daughters off with Nair for sensitive skin. I was afraid they might accidentally cut themselves with a razor. As their fist razor I got them the battery operated ones that can be used wet or dry
  • Will_Thrust_For_Candy
    Will_Thrust_For_Candy Posts: 6,109 Member
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    I started my daughters off with Nair for sensitive skin. I was afraid they might accidentally cut themselves with a razor. As their fist razor I got them the battery operated ones that can be used wet or dry

    Actually I had just considered Nair after I wrote my last post. I feel the same as you....worried that she would cut herself and just not wanting her to have to worry about maintaining at such a young age. I guess I just did a very poor job of articulating myself :smile: Thank you!
  • _Krys10_
    _Krys10_ Posts: 1,234 Member
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    Teach her to shave, she doesn't need to to feel waxing
  • Bonneylynne
    Bonneylynne Posts: 9
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    Oh no, it's more than one hair.....

    And it's not that she should be ashamed of it by any means....it's that it's a pain the *kitten* quite frankly. That's the only reason I considered waxing and or laser. Honestly shaving my armpits is the biggest inconvenience and for me it's just not pleasant. Mine have gotten scarred over the years and just don't ever have a nice clean shaven look and/or feel....

    so while some of you may think it's ridiculous, I'm really just considering long term for her....nothing else.

    And it's also not that I am against her shaving, it's just that she is young.....so yeah, shaving sucks and why start early if there is an alternate solution.

    Definitely regretting this posting right now :ohwell:
  • Bonneylynne
    Bonneylynne Posts: 9
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    Really? You're regretting this post? I think you had a valid question and its obvious that you are going to get different opinions (I'm assuming that's why you asked)??
    It almost sounds like you really want to get waxing or laser done for your daughter, and you're looking for everyone to agree with you?
    Maybe discuss the options with your daughter and see what she wants.
  • trubs182
    trubs182 Posts: 146 Member
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    I'd also recommend some sort of hair removal cream for sensitive skin. I use it myself on my knees (had a nasty shaving accident, sliced a load of skin off my knee in my teens so have been paranoid since!!) and find it very effective. If you go for razors buy decent ones (I know you would!), perhaps like the Venus range that move with the shape of the skin rather than being fixed/rigid. Less chance of nasty nicks!
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
    No dear, there's nothing to regret, honest :ohwell: It was a legit question and if I made you feel awkward about it, that wasn't my intention & I apologize :embarassed:

    We good? ...Great. :wink:

    Nair is also a good idea, I only hesitate to use it for a child as there is only so long you can leave that stuff on your skin, I had trouble with the timing cause I'm a derp :laugh: In other words, when using it, I would make it 'girl's time' and do it together along with a timer & not while in the shower, but as an activity to be done before, so make time.

    I've used it myself quite a bit as I also have a difficult time with underarm shaving. The hairs grow in multiple directions, so in order to get a close baby soft shave, you need to run the razor in all 4 directions with multiple passes including on the diagonal in both ways.

    This gives me a shave as close as my legs, BUT....I regret the hell out of it within 2 days as it itches like the ****ens as it's almost as if it's TOO close of a shave. :huh:

    Anyhow, good luck :flowerforyou:
  • amyk0202
    amyk0202 Posts: 667 Member
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    When my daughter was younger & started shaving, I bought her a Gillette Venus with the huge soap/lotion cartridge around the blade. It seemed like she was less likely to cut herself with it. If you are really worried about it, I would go with the Nair although it smells horrible.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    Personally I think it's a downright terrible that a little girl should feel shame for something that is completely natural. Thanks a lot American standards...wonder if French girls feel the same shame?

    Good mama teaching her this is natural. Sadly she has to shave it though as the kids will ridicule her in school, and she may not be strong enough to stand up to the idiots and teach them a little bit about biology.

    I dont think I would want a permanent solution like laser. She may have no problem with her armpit fur as she gets older and want it you never know. Plus she's too young and is going to continue to get more hair.

    Wax I think would be so painful on that delicate skin.

    Get a small head razor lots of shave cream stand in the mirror with a sink full of warm water and remove it. Venus makes a razor now with bar for the "shave cream" and I would think that with a generous dollop of real shave cream would work.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    Actually I just considered that maybe I should just trim it for her. The hair is quite long, but there isn't much of it. Maybe that would be better for now, rather than starting on a shaving (or alternate) regime :ohwell:

    lolwut. :laugh:
    It's one hair :ohwell: :blushing: awwwww. That's cute as hell. If trimming it off will work, definately...go for it :drinker:

    oh yeah if you can just trim it go for this option it might be light enough, and still reinforces that hair on a human mammal is normal
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    I started my daughters off with Nair for sensitive skin. I was afraid they might accidentally cut themselves with a razor. As their fist razor I got them the battery operated ones that can be used wet or dry

    Actually I had just considered Nair after I wrote my last post. I feel the same as you....worried that she would cut herself and just not wanting her to have to worry about maintaining at such a young age. I guess I just did a very poor job of articulating myself :smile: Thank you!

    just remind her to keep her arms up while it's doing the job. I burned the heck out of my armpits once by putting my arms down, but that was before sensitive skin was invented so who knows.
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
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    My girl's 14 and when she needed to shave the pits, we got right on it. I made her wait a *little* while longer to shave her legs (mommy wasn't ready for her to be THAT grown up). Now that she's been allowed to shave her legs for a couple years.. .she rarely does. She'll grow into it.

    In our culture shaving ones armpits is pretty standard. While I doubt anyone is staring at her pits if she's wearing a tshirt, there's no sense in making her miserable. Just let her shave. If she wants to persue other hair removal options when she's older then that will be her choice.
  • BurningAway
    BurningAway Posts: 279
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    Im going to be honest, i started shaving at 10 and i wish to god my mother would have taught me to wax. When i shave the stubble is itchy and bothers me more so then waxing once a week id have to shave everyday but im older if u can trim it up do it up :)

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