your mistakes made
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I was operating at an elite level of fitness and then diagnosed with thyroid cancer. I had a total thyroidectomy and listened to much of the internet woo that this regulated metabolism and I was doomed to a life of obesity.
I discovered MFP years later as my wife had enjoyed success with this site. I read the stickied threads and listened to those who were successful and took careful note of my habits and behaviors and if these led to increased health or not. I lost 60 lbs the first year and then stopped logging. I regained about 30 lbs in a matter of months. Took note of every habit that did not stick and adjusted. Began logging once again and in a matter of months was back at my optimal weight. I shifted my habits to mindful activities and established a number of goals to continually challenge myself.
So after 4 years of logging and maintaining my failures all result from the same root cause - failing to track and trend.28 -
My main mistake last time I lost weight was developing an all-or-nothing mentality. After regaining completely, it took me years to shake myself out of a depressive slump where I felt like a switch had flipped and I was just completely unable to lost weight or have a healthy relationship with food. Thankfully, therapy has helped me start to overcome that mentality; trying to keep in mind that it’s the overall habits that matter, not an individual “bad” choice.13
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Punishing myself, meaning "I ate x, so now I can't eat dinner" which made me give up. That was many a years ago and I've since learned the importance of having compassion and forgiveness for yourself.9
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Which time?
For this time:
Looking back at my early log entries I made many classic mistake. There were things I didn't weigh. Things for which I chose the wrong DB entry. Things I underestimated. Things I grossly overestimated. I am glad I didn't actually worry about my mistakes but just kept logging and learning.
I think education is key and it was my ignorance about certain things that held me back on every other previous attempt.
Why the woo? I identify with this. I’ve discovered errors with entries, significant errors, for things I’ve eaten almost daily for a year! Oh well. We do get better accuracy with practice. Logging is a great tool.9 -
Worst mistake was VLC dieting in my 20’s when I probably lost LBM along with fat. I wish I had spent my 20’s gaining LBM instead. I actually had a MD tell me to start weight lifting, and I blew off the advice. “It may not ever be easy for you to gain muscle and bone, but it will never be easier than it is in your 20’s.” Missed opportunity.7
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My biggest mistakes were:
- excluding completely certain foods, like bread, pasta, rice, sweets/dessert out of my diet. As it turns out, much better strategy for me is to moderate, nothing is off limits.
- thinking that once weight is lost, i can gradually return to the way i was eating before. Nope, no way.
- not knowing what the portion size really is, and how much i was actually eating, not using food scale.
Those mistakes caused me many years of yoyo, regaining all weight lost and adding another 5-10 lbs to it before i would get some resemblance of control. Then i would feel defeated and believing that losing weight and sustaining the loss was the battle i could never win, so why even bother.7 -
Thinking I could guesstimate calories in food and not bothering to log it....ended up gaining back all the weight I had lost 😭7
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Lessons I've learned in previous failed attempts that have helped me to succeed this time.
- Misery doesn't burn any extra calories and there are no prizes for doing things the hard way. It's not a punishment and it's counterproductive to view it as a battle.
- It's about weight management, not weight loss. Weight loss has an end date, weight management is for life. Weight management is about being in control of your weight. Making conscious decisions about when you'll eat in a deficit to lose weight, eat at maintenance, or even eat in a surplus to splurge and enjoy life.
- It's all about consistency. It's better to eat 'pretty well' forever than 'perfectly' for a month or two. It's better to eat in a sustainable calorie deficit than overstrict for a while then binge.
- If it's not a 'forever' change then it's not worth making. Temporary changes yield temporary results and as soon as you stop you just end up back where you started. There a loads of different ways to achieve results so find the ones that you can honestly say are forever and make those changes and discard the others.
- Motivation is a catalyst for change not a fuel. Motivation is what starts a change, not what keeps it going. Motivation is the temporary burst that overcomes inertia and gets things moving. But it's temporary and limited. Once motivation has set things in motion it's done it's job. You can't rely on motivation to keep you going and you certainly can't rely on someone else to motivate you.
- Support is bonus but shouldn't be a necessity. In the end this is something you have to do yourself and while having supportive people can make things easier they can't do this for you. Support is nice, support is helpful but when all is said and done if you don't do this yourself all the support in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
- Weight management is simple (but not necessarily easy) so don't overthink it. When it comes down to it weight management isn't complicated. For the most part it's a very simple energy equation so there's no point making things more difficult than it needs to be. Find what works, do what works and keep it simple.
- The old saying you can't out run your fork. While there's a small degree of overlap, generally speaking weight management happens in the kitchen and fitness happens in the gym.
- Weight management isn't worth compromising or missing out on the good things in life. There are 365 days in the year, a week here and a few day there of indulgence while celebrating or on vacation only accounts for about 8% of the year and no matter how much you indulge isn't going to undo the progress of the other 92% so live it up when you get the chance. Life's too short.
- Denial and deprivation don't work. I want what I want and denying myself something isn't going to stop me wanting it. In the end that craving will be indulged and chances are I'm gonna make the most of the 'forbidden' and really go to town. A much better approach is to have nothing off limits. This takes away the lure of the forbidden, allows for 'controlled' indulgences, removes the feeling of deprivation and denial and the guilt associated with 'falling off the wagon'.54 -
@Danp This is one of the most profound, yet deceptively simple tips I've run across in a long time:
- It's about weight management, not weight loss. Weight loss has an end date, weight management is for life.
I'm going to start thinking of what I'm doing in terms of weight management now. Thank you for this insight.28 -
Probably relying too much on heavy cardio for years instead of focusing on healthier eating habits. It seems that contributed to my hormone *kitten* storm and I was diagnosed with chronic fatigue. I still do a little cardio but I focus on strength training . I also kept joining WW thinking that time would somehow be different and I’d keep the weight off. I ate a lot of ‘diet’ foods that were essentially processed garbage because they were low in points. Now I realize whole food is where it’s at and I’ll have to track for the rest of my life if I want to maintain any weight loss.7
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So much good advice on this thread and so much that rings true for me too... my biggest mistakes:
1) not tracking. When I don’t track, it’s usually because either I’m lazy or I know I’m WAY over my calorie allotment and don’t want to face it or because I think I’m ok and don’t need to track anymore... I think I’m now learning I’ve got to do this for life if I want to maintain and not continue the yo-yo cycle
2) turning one bad meal into a bad day/s. One small slip up can make me think, “forget it... the day/week is blown”, rather than “ok, I slipped... time to get back on track”... the “one cookie” phenomenon referenced above is so true! And also applies to one serving of any treat (sub chocolate, ice cream, etc)
3) overestimating portion sizes. Weigh/measure everything! And read labels. You’d be surprised at the difference between what is considered a serving and what you’d normally serve yourself!
4) making excuses to not get to the gym... “I’m traveling” is a prime one. There’s a gym in every hotel I go to but because there’s no Zumba (my favorite kind of exercise), I end up not working out... I could’ve put on a Zumba video or gotten on an elliptical.... I’m still working on this one... sigh...
5) letting stress get to me. Stress makes me overeat and feel miserable. The best thing you can do is try to keep stress at bay... meditate, exercise, talk to friends/family about whatever is bothering you, do whatever works for you but get control of your emotions. Too often, I try to medicate with junk food and the result makes things worse.
For me, the biggest tips are:
1) be on MFP daily. Track. Read people’s posts. There’s great advice and support here!
2) know your body and what works for you. When in doubt, overestimate calories in and underestimate calories out (it’s easy to underestimate how many calories a cookie is and overestimate how many calories you burned on a walk)... be realistic and honest with yourself
3) don’t bring junk food into the house (prevent one cookie phenomenon!) and try to steer clear when outside.
4) find exercise you love and do it everyday
5) de-stress
Remember, this is a marathon not a sprint. Weight goes up and down. One bad day isn’t the end of the world; you can get back on track. But you’ve got to keep your end goal in focus and not give up completely!12 -
Lessons I've learned in previous failed attempts that have helped me to succeed this time.
- Misery doesn't burn any extra calories and there are no prizes for doing things the hard way. It's not a punishment and it's counterproductive to view it as a battle.
- It's about weight management, not weight loss. Weight loss has an end date, weight management is for life. Weight management is about being in control of your weight. Making conscious decisions about when you'll eat in a deficit to lose weight, eat at maintenance, or even eat in a surplus to splurge and enjoy life.
- It's all about consistency. It's better to eat 'pretty well' forever than 'perfectly' for a month or two. It's better to eat in a sustainable calorie deficit than overstrict for a while then binge.
- If it's not a 'forever' change then it's not worth making. Temporary changes yield temporary results and as soon as you stop you just end up back where you started. There a loads of different ways to achieve results so find the ones that you can honestly say are forever and make those changes and discard the others.
- Motivation is a catalyst for change not a fuel. Motivation is what starts a change, not what keeps it going. Motivation is the temporary burst that overcomes inertia and gets things moving. But it's temporary and limited. Once motivation has set things in motion it's done it's job. You can't rely on motivation to keep you going and you certainly can't rely on someone else to motivate you.
- Support is bonus but shouldn't be a necessity. In the end this is something you have to do yourself and while having supportive people can make things easier they can't do this for you. Support is nice, support is helpful but when all is said and done if you don't do this yourself all the support in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
- Weight management is simple (but not necessarily easy) so don't overthink it. When it comes down to it weight management isn't complicated. For the most part it's a very simple energy equation so there's no point making things more difficult than it needs to be. Find what works, do what works and keep it simple.
- The old saying you can't out run your fork. While there's a small degree of overlap, generally speaking weight management happens in the kitchen and fitness happens in the gym.
- Weight management isn't worth compromising or missing out on the good things in life. There are 365 days in the year, a week here and a few day there of indulgence while celebrating or on vacation only accounts for about 8% of the year and no matter how much you indulge isn't going to undo the progress of the other 92% so live it up when you get the chance. Life's too short.
- Denial and deprivation don't work. I want what I want and denying myself something isn't going to stop me wanting it. In the end that craving will be indulged and chances are I'm gonna make the most of the 'forbidden' and really go to town. A much better approach is to have nothing off limits. This takes away the lure of the forbidden, allows for 'controlled' indulgences, removes the feeling of deprivation and denial and the guilt associated with 'falling off the wagon'.
This should be a sticky...14 -
I read here that, "Permanent results require permanent changes." That really stuck and resonated with me. It refers to the idea above that weight loss comes to an and but weight management is forever. My mistakes before distill down to not understanding this concept.6
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garystrickland357 wrote: »Lessons I've learned in previous failed attempts that have helped me to succeed this time.
- Misery doesn't burn any extra calories and there are no prizes for doing things the hard way. It's not a punishment and it's counterproductive to view it as a battle.
- It's about weight management, not weight loss. Weight loss has an end date, weight management is for life. Weight management is about being in control of your weight. Making conscious decisions about when you'll eat in a deficit to lose weight, eat at maintenance, or even eat in a surplus to splurge and enjoy life.
- It's all about consistency. It's better to eat 'pretty well' forever than 'perfectly' for a month or two. It's better to eat in a sustainable calorie deficit than overstrict for a while then binge.
- If it's not a 'forever' change then it's not worth making. Temporary changes yield temporary results and as soon as you stop you just end up back where you started. There a loads of different ways to achieve results so find the ones that you can honestly say are forever and make those changes and discard the others.
- Motivation is a catalyst for change not a fuel. Motivation is what starts a change, not what keeps it going. Motivation is the temporary burst that overcomes inertia and gets things moving. But it's temporary and limited. Once motivation has set things in motion it's done it's job. You can't rely on motivation to keep you going and you certainly can't rely on someone else to motivate you.
- Support is bonus but shouldn't be a necessity. In the end this is something you have to do yourself and while having supportive people can make things easier they can't do this for you. Support is nice, support is helpful but when all is said and done if you don't do this yourself all the support in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
- Weight management is simple (but not necessarily easy) so don't overthink it. When it comes down to it weight management isn't complicated. For the most part it's a very simple energy equation so there's no point making things more difficult than it needs to be. Find what works, do what works and keep it simple.
- The old saying you can't out run your fork. While there's a small degree of overlap, generally speaking weight management happens in the kitchen and fitness happens in the gym.
- Weight management isn't worth compromising or missing out on the good things in life. There are 365 days in the year, a week here and a few day there of indulgence while celebrating or on vacation only accounts for about 8% of the year and no matter how much you indulge isn't going to undo the progress of the other 92% so live it up when you get the chance. Life's too short.
- Denial and deprivation don't work. I want what I want and denying myself something isn't going to stop me wanting it. In the end that craving will be indulged and chances are I'm gonna make the most of the 'forbidden' and really go to town. A much better approach is to have nothing off limits. This takes away the lure of the forbidden, allows for 'controlled' indulgences, removes the feeling of deprivation and denial and the guilt associated with 'falling off the wagon'.
This should be a sticky...
Agreed. This is one of the best things I've read on these forums.5 -
Not getting my mental health in place before working on my physical health. This has lead to severe anxiety over food, calories, "being good", and failure. As such, I have had to stop with the calorie counting for the time being after another round of anxiety attacks, tears, and anger at myself.15
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My BIG mistake was thinking I had it ALL figured out and got away from logging and weighing my portions. I lost close to 70 lbs. when I was at Calorie Count. When the site closed and we all moved here, I was in Maintenance Mode. I thought I had everything down and could now "eyeball" my meals. That soon led to COMPLACENCY which then became LAZY. 60 lbs GAINED later, I am BACK ... HUMBLY... ready to KICK IT in gear and get back on track!
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Demanding perfection of myself and giving up when I couldn't achieve it. Learn to rest, not quit and aim for progress not perfection.❤12
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MY biggest mistake is not starting 10 years ago.9
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Another huge past mistake was paying for "program" foods (ie Medifast). I did lose a lot of weight, but eventually I quit buying the food. I was able to maintain for a few years, but then I quit eating modest amounts and gained it all back plus.1
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garystrickland357 wrote: »Lessons I've learned in previous failed attempts that have helped me to succeed this time.
- Misery doesn't burn any extra calories and there are no prizes for doing things the hard way. It's not a punishment and it's counterproductive to view it as a battle.
- It's about weight management, not weight loss. Weight loss has an end date, weight management is for life. Weight management is about being in control of your weight. Making conscious decisions about when you'll eat in a deficit to lose weight, eat at maintenance, or even eat in a surplus to splurge and enjoy life.
- It's all about consistency. It's better to eat 'pretty well' forever than 'perfectly' for a month or two. It's better to eat in a sustainable calorie deficit than overstrict for a while then binge.
- If it's not a 'forever' change then it's not worth making. Temporary changes yield temporary results and as soon as you stop you just end up back where you started. There a loads of different ways to achieve results so find the ones that you can honestly say are forever and make those changes and discard the others.
- Motivation is a catalyst for change not a fuel. Motivation is what starts a change, not what keeps it going. Motivation is the temporary burst that overcomes inertia and gets things moving. But it's temporary and limited. Once motivation has set things in motion it's done it's job. You can't rely on motivation to keep you going and you certainly can't rely on someone else to motivate you.
- Support is bonus but shouldn't be a necessity. In the end this is something you have to do yourself and while having supportive people can make things easier they can't do this for you. Support is nice, support is helpful but when all is said and done if you don't do this yourself all the support in the world isn't going to make a lick of difference.
- Weight management is simple (but not necessarily easy) so don't overthink it. When it comes down to it weight management isn't complicated. For the most part it's a very simple energy equation so there's no point making things more difficult than it needs to be. Find what works, do what works and keep it simple.
- The old saying you can't out run your fork. While there's a small degree of overlap, generally speaking weight management happens in the kitchen and fitness happens in the gym.
- Weight management isn't worth compromising or missing out on the good things in life. There are 365 days in the year, a week here and a few day there of indulgence while celebrating or on vacation only accounts for about 8% of the year and no matter how much you indulge isn't going to undo the progress of the other 92% so live it up when you get the chance. Life's too short.
- Denial and deprivation don't work. I want what I want and denying myself something isn't going to stop me wanting it. In the end that craving will be indulged and chances are I'm gonna make the most of the 'forbidden' and really go to town. A much better approach is to have nothing off limits. This takes away the lure of the forbidden, allows for 'controlled' indulgences, removes the feeling of deprivation and denial and the guilt associated with 'falling off the wagon'.
This should be a sticky...
Agreed. This is one of the best things I've read on these forums.
I've already suggested the thread to be stickied 3
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