Mentally Exhausted
Krisydee
Posts: 100 Member
I think the worst part about trying to lose weight is the constant battle inside your head. I feel like I have a split personality and it scares me. I will literally lay in bed at night and convince myself not to go to the fridge. All day I'm constantly fighting with myself it shouldn't be this exhausting. I want to so bad and I am so good when it comes to setting my mind to it. I can actually do it but in the beginning it is all mine games Within Myself. It is scary and frustrating and I feel so emotionally drained by the end of the day. Does anybody else feel this way? Any advice? Or if you just want to rant about what I just said or relate to what I just said. Rant over
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Replies
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Literally going through the same thing. Had a full breakdown tonight bc I ate 260 over my calories. Life shouldn’t be this freaking stressful about weight. I feel punished that for the rest of my life I have to watch what I eat, count calories and weigh my food just to not gain more weight while there are people who can eat whatever and not gain a pound. People who are naturally thin, and don’t worry about body image. I’m so ready to give up.12
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That's normal, for now. Unfortunately your body doesn't know that there's a difference between choosing to eat less, and starving. Its fighting you, trying to get you to eat more, because it doesn't want you to starve.
It will go away. You will feel better if you give it time. I know it's hard. I'm there with you. But we can do this! You have GOT this, I believe in you.
Drink water, too. It tricks you into feeling full so it gets a touch easier.
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Yes, and I think the mental exhaustion is why I keep quitting. Not so much feeling deprived, just get tired of having to be so everloving vigilant all the time.10
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It goes away. You get used to eating less and you stop fighting all the time. At one point is becomes more of a choice than a fight.
Hang in there a little longer.11 -
Take a deep breath.
Put yourself at maintenance.
Eat what you like to eat within your maintenance calories.
Use a digital scale for all foods, and double check you are using correct entries.
Learn what portion sizes work for you, and what portions you can decrease.
When you are ready start decreasing your calories.
Every 250 cals a day less will give you 0.5 lbs loss per week.
Reduce at a level that suits you. You don’t have to do it fast, you don’t have to do it slow, you just have to be in a calorie deficit over time.
If logging is hard, stressful, do it for a month so you know your portion sizes. Then go by portions and your body scale weight. If you are maintaining, or gaining, drop your portion size, or cut a snack, or replace the snack with a lower calorie option.
Look for ways that make it easy. If that means for the first couple of months you are only maintaining- that’s a win. You know how much it takes to maintain. The next step is just eating a little less.
You haven’t mentioned exercise. It’s good for you, but not needed. I would encourage you, eventually to up your general daily movement, or start exercising. It’s good for your health, and gives you more calories to eat.
Take breaks when you need them to reduce stress.
Be kind to yourself and forgiving.
Cheers, h.26 -
I just wrote this in another post..but I'll repeat it here.. I think about what I CAN eat... not what I can't. Thinking in terms of a deficit and limiting food intake is too negative and draining for me. That makes me think about food in a negative way and food should be celebrated.
I just ate the wrong foods that didn't feed my body..how I enjoy assembling big salads with a variety of lettuces, dicing white and green onions, heirloom tomatoes, and red a yellow peppers with cucumbers. Maybe sear a few sea scallops to go with it and have a portion of basmati rice with chopped mint from my garden. That's my mindset.7 -
sending you love and strength. i feel you, completely. all thw above posters have some great advice but remember to jst be kind to yourself
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lbjourneytobeauty wrote: »Literally going through the same thing. Had a full breakdown tonight bc I ate 260 over my calories. Life shouldn’t be this freaking stressful about weight. I feel punished that for the rest of my life I have to watch what I eat, count calories and weigh my food just to not gain more weight while there are people who can eat whatever and not gain a pound. People who are naturally thin, and don’t worry about body image. I’m so ready to give up.
Oh god you're preaching to the choir! I am just hoping that this settles in the next weeks. I've done it before but it's is ssssoooo freaking hard in the beginning!!! 😭😭😭I'm hoping I never go off the wagon again! We got this! We got this! We got this! The only thing that has been saving me is in moments of weakened I come on here and/or listen to the "inspirational speeches" channel on my spotify!2 -
That's normal, for now. Unfortunately your body doesn't know that there's a difference between choosing to eat less, and starving. Its fighting you, trying to get you to eat more, because it doesn't want you to starve.
It will go away. You will feel better if you give it time. I know it's hard. I'm there with you. But we can do this! You have GOT this, I believe in you.
Drink water, too. It tricks you into feeling full so it gets a touch easier.
Aaaawww thanks girlie 1 -
It goes away. You get used to eating less and you stop fighting all the time. At one point is becomes more of a choice than a fight.
Hang in there a little longer.
Last time I went this hard was in 2015. It took me about 2 weeks of actual NONE cheat days and being exactly precise in my calorie counting (weighing, etc...). How long did it take you??0 -
middlehaitch wrote: »Take a deep breath.
Put yourself at maintenance.
Eat what you like to eat within your maintenance calories.
Use a digital scale for all foods, and double check you are using correct entries.
Learn what portion sizes work for you, and what portions you can decrease.
When you are ready start decreasing your calories.
Every 250 cals a day less will give you 0.5 lbs loss per week.
Reduce at a level that suits you. You don’t have to do it fast, you don’t have to do it slow, you just have to be in a calorie deficit over time.
If logging is hard, stressful, do it for a month so you know your portion sizes. Then go by portions and your body scale weight. If you are maintaining, or gaining, drop your portion size, or cut a snack, or replace the snack with a lower calorie option.
Look for ways that make it easy. If that means for the first couple of months you are only maintaining- that’s a win. You know how much it takes to maintain. The next step is just eating a little less.
You haven’t mentioned exercise. It’s good for you, but not needed. I would encourage you, eventually to up your general daily movement, or start exercising. It’s good for your health, and gives you more calories to eat.
Take breaks when you need them to reduce stress.
Be kind to yourself and forgiving.
Cheers, h.
Thank you for this but my post was trully about the mental hold it has on people. I don't want to maintain. I gained 50lbs this past year (IKR!!) After a car accident I was in and am finally able to run, job, lift weights so that it what I'm doing. I understand breaking a habit is hard and that is what I am going through right now. Some people, it doesn't matter if they eat at maintenance or below maintenance it is a constant battle inside their head whether its about always "eating healthy" or "eating less" or even "eating at maintenance" from what you're used to. People with actual food addiction whether they're skinny average or large it is a real issue especially with the MSG in the food they make now and all this other addicting crap! It makes it very hard to kick the habit and it messes with your head. But I do appreciate you taking the time to reply.9 -
kathryn1391 wrote: »sending you love and strength. i feel you, completely. all thw above posters have some great advice but remember to jst be kind to yourself
thank you!0 -
elisa123gal wrote: »I just wrote this in another post..but I'll repeat it here.. I think about what I CAN eat... not what I can't. Thinking in terms of a deficit and limiting food intake is too negative and draining for me. That makes me think about food in a negative way and food should be celebrated.
I just ate the wrong foods that didn't feed my body..how I enjoy assembling big salads with a variety of lettuces, dicing white and green onions, heirloom tomatoes, and red a yellow peppers with cucumbers. Maybe sear a few sea scallops to go with it and have a portion of basmati rice with chopped mint from my garden. That's my mindset.
I don't want to look at food as celebration but strictly for survival. I HATE food and what it does to people. Other things should be meant to be enjoyed! Life experiences, walks, nice views, family gatherings, etc... Why is food always there! The hold that food has on us as a society disgust me! Sorry to say...6 -
I don't want to look at food as celebration but strictly for survival. I HATE food and what it does to people. Other things should be meant to be enjoyed! Life experiences, walks, nice views, family gatherings, etc... Why is food always there! The hold that food has on us as a society disgust me! Sorry to say...
This is very sad to read. It's possible to enjoy food without going overboard - sometimes it can be a bit of a challenge, but it's possible! I'm sorry you're not in that place mentally yet, but I hope you find something that works for you.10 -
@Krisydee Start making the shift away from All or Nothing Thinking. This is a thing. It's not going to happen overnight. You can choose to moderate yourself with food. Moderating yourself with food is the place where peace with food happens.7
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lbjourneytobeauty wrote: »Literally going through the same thing. Had a full breakdown tonight bc I ate 260 over my calories. Life shouldn’t be this freaking stressful about weight. I feel punished that for the rest of my life I have to watch what I eat, count calories and weigh my food just to not gain more weight while there are people who can eat whatever and not gain a pound. People who are naturally thin, and don’t worry about body image. I’m so ready to give up.
See, I don't think this is true.
People who are naturally thin have come up with Rules in Their Own Heads.
No one can eat whatever and not gain a pound, that's not the way it works.
What happens is that people who maintain a certain weight have taught themselves over the years how to eat. Maybe it happened when they were 15 or maybe it took them until they were in their 40s or whatever - but we all have to make our peace with food.
I would LOVE to eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's every day. As a matter of fact I did that for years. But then I had to either stop doing that or stop eating so much other food or stay fat.
All of life is about choices and habits. Once you make the better choices for a while they become the new habits and it's easier.
It was hard for me in the beginning of weight loss because the rules in my head had long ago been kicked to the curb. I had no rules. It was all the hedonism all the time. I had to learn all over again how to say, "No."21 -
elisa123gal wrote: »I just wrote this in another post..but I'll repeat it here.. I think about what I CAN eat... not what I can't. Thinking in terms of a deficit and limiting food intake is too negative and draining for me. That makes me think about food in a negative way and food should be celebrated.
I just ate the wrong foods that didn't feed my body..how I enjoy assembling big salads with a variety of lettuces, dicing white and green onions, heirloom tomatoes, and red a yellow peppers with cucumbers. Maybe sear a few sea scallops to go with it and have a portion of basmati rice with chopped mint from my garden. That's my mindset.
I don't want to look at food as celebration but strictly for survival. I HATE food and what it does to people. Other things should be meant to be enjoyed! Life experiences, walks, nice views, family gatherings, etc... Why is food always there! The hold that food has on us as a society disgust me! Sorry to say...
If you hate food and can just eat for survival losing weight should be a cake walk for you. (pardon the pun). I love food, I see it as art and an expression of love and that it tells the stories of cultures and societies..
along with my love for food I travel and experience many things in life.. and I fit very well into my airplane seat as I do..
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I also love to travel and enjoy food from different parts of the world. Have now decided it's time to get serious about my weight and joined myfitnesspal so that I can record by food...keeping me on track and I am seeing results. I know portion size was my main downfall along with some junk food choices. Good luck to everyone on this journey.2
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elisa123gal wrote: »elisa123gal wrote: »I just wrote this in another post..but I'll repeat it here.. I think about what I CAN eat... not what I can't. Thinking in terms of a deficit and limiting food intake is too negative and draining for me. That makes me think about food in a negative way and food should be celebrated.
I just ate the wrong foods that didn't feed my body..how I enjoy assembling big salads with a variety of lettuces, dicing white and green onions, heirloom tomatoes, and red a yellow peppers with cucumbers. Maybe sear a few sea scallops to go with it and have a portion of basmati rice with chopped mint from my garden. That's my mindset.
I don't want to look at food as celebration but strictly for survival. I HATE food and what it does to people. Other things should be meant to be enjoyed! Life experiences, walks, nice views, family gatherings, etc... Why is food always there! The hold that food has on us as a society disgust me! Sorry to say...
If you hate food and can just eat for survival losing weight should be a cake walk for you. (pardon the pun). I love food, I see it as art and an expression of love and that it tells the stories of cultures and societies..
along with my love for food I travel and experience many things in life.. and I fit very well into my airplane seat as I do..
I don't think you quite understand when I say I HATE food. I HATE what it does to me physically amd mentally. I know I'm going through withdrawal right now because I've been eating like crap this year but that's just because of the way food is made now.2 -
This thread is exhausting.9
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Unless the food contains something like cocaine or heroin, there's nothing addictive in it (despite what the woosters would have you believe). That addiction is more a mental thing, and food is really no more addictive than say petting puppies. Sometimes we put a lot more pressure on ourselves and complicate weight loss way more than it has to be. Cutting out things we love and then berating ourselves over not being able to have it or "giving in" when we do can be more detrimental than say learning how to make it work. It's as much a mental game (if not more) than a physical one. I do think the advice to take a step back is a good one, if only temporarily. Perhaps readjust the plan. Pick smaller steps and once you've mastered one, head on to the next. Big changes are built from small ones. Many of us had to re-think how we thought about food, and no it's not always easy. But it is worth the effort.10
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We need to eat food to live, but culturally, because we need food, we've turned it into a social thing. We now view eating/sharing food as a bonding exercise.
You can too. Just because you can't have as much food as before doesn't mean you can't enjoy what you have now.
Well, you don't have to get there right away. Give it time. Hate is a destructive feeling. Work on ambivalence: don't care about it one way or the other.
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elisa123gal wrote: »elisa123gal wrote: »I just wrote this in another post..but I'll repeat it here.. I think about what I CAN eat... not what I can't. Thinking in terms of a deficit and limiting food intake is too negative and draining for me. That makes me think about food in a negative way and food should be celebrated.
I just ate the wrong foods that didn't feed my body..how I enjoy assembling big salads with a variety of lettuces, dicing white and green onions, heirloom tomatoes, and red a yellow peppers with cucumbers. Maybe sear a few sea scallops to go with it and have a portion of basmati rice with chopped mint from my garden. That's my mindset.
I don't want to look at food as celebration but strictly for survival. I HATE food and what it does to people. Other things should be meant to be enjoyed! Life experiences, walks, nice views, family gatherings, etc... Why is food always there! The hold that food has on us as a society disgust me! Sorry to say...
If you hate food and can just eat for survival losing weight should be a cake walk for you. (pardon the pun). I love food, I see it as art and an expression of love and that it tells the stories of cultures and societies..
along with my love for food I travel and experience many things in life.. and I fit very well into my airplane seat as I do..
I don't think you quite understand when I say I HATE food. I HATE what it does to me physically amd mentally. I know I'm going through withdrawal right now because I've been eating like crap this year but that's just because of the way food is made now.
You gotta repair that relationship with food. I hated food while I was binge eating. Wasn't fun. I had to slow down and learn to like food again, even if that meant a little more gain, because trying to control food intake while you hate it doesn't work. Gets exhausting quickly. I learned how to cook (not well, but better, lol) and I learned how to present food and eat slowly and get cute plates and *kitten*. I just had to cultivate my relationship with food because it was important to me. The only other thing you can do is make food less important in your life, but for most people that's just not really a thing.7 -
Everyone else has already said it so wonderfully, but it truly does get better. I sort of link my hunger issues with my anxiety issues - I try to focus on my coping skills when either gets bad. Try to distract yourself, make sure to keep around things you enjoy. It also helps to make what is available food-wise healthier options. I have found the more I rely on those choices, the more I crave it over unhealthy things.
Stay strong, you've got this!3 -
Everyone else has already said it so wonderfully, but it truly does get better. I sort of link my hunger issues with my anxiety issues - I try to focus on my coping skills when either gets bad. Try to distract yourself, make sure to keep around things you enjoy. It also helps to make what is available food-wise healthier options. I have found the more I rely on those choices, the more I crave it over unhealthy things.
Stay strong, you've got this!
Thank you I will try and put all this advice into practice 1 -
I feel the same way. I finally lost some weight and now its a battle of i want to eat what i used to but i still have more wight to loose. Its a constant struggle but for me it helps having some support. Feel free to message me0
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The problem is that trying to eat different or less and tracking everything makes you think about food ALL the time so you can go a bit food crazy some times with it on your mind non stop.
After so long I see I have calories leftover in the diary and you just find yourself thinking you can eat more because there's calories left.
If you're genuinely hungry then eat, but just be careful what you're eating and drink a glass of water to make sure it's not thirst which also gives you the wrong messages of hunger instead of thirst.
Give yourself a evening cut off time where you must not eat anymore.
Mines 9pm.
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I'm so sorry you are having to come back after an accident. Gaining weight because of enforced immobility of some kind is so hard, may be because of background frustration from letting the situation get away from you in the first place, back when you needed to eat to ensure adequate proteins and essential elements in a good quantity to aid your recovery. Please do not be hard on yourself. May be, if going into maintenance to be able to take a breather and set up your past coping strategies is not what you want to do could you perhaps reduce your target each week, even setting and keeping to 1lb, even 1/2 a lb would still be progress but could give you the space to be kind to yourself. Primarily, take care of yourself properly, for you.1
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I'm so sorry you are having to come back after an accident. Gaining weight because of enforced immobility of some kind is so hard, may be because of background frustration from letting the situation get away from you in the first place, back when you needed to eat to ensure adequate proteins and essential elements in a good quantity to aid your recovery. Please do not be hard on yourself. May be, if going into maintenance to be able to take a breather and set up your past coping strategies is not what you want to do could you perhaps reduce your target each week, even setting and keeping to 1lb, even 1/2 a lb would still be progress but could give you the space to be kind to yourself. Primarily, take care of yourself properly, for you.
Well I had some beers over the weekend but back at it hard tomorrow. Thank you for your kind words and advice 0
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