Legs look like they belong on a different person :(
nettiklive
Posts: 206 Member
Okay I know you can't spot reduce. But I just need to vent because I'm feeling really frustrated with my body. I am a pear shape. I maintained a constant weight I was happy with for over twelve years (intuitive eating, no logging, only loose mental tracking), I've always had thick legs and it's only at the very low end of the bmi range that they looked decent. Not super shapely but at least not fat. Well over this winter, probably due to my glass of wine habit going from twice a week to daily, I got distracted and gained 4-5 lbs. Doesn't sound like a big deal, except on my fairly lean small frame it is super noticeable particularly because it seems to literally all settle in my thighs! My hips and legs from the knee up look awful, chunky and cellulite-y. Two years ago I tried to start a very gradual recomp, with lifting - squats, deadlifts, loosely based on Stronglifts/ Strongcurves but not following the program to a T, and was very happy with my body a year ago. I've been trying to lose the extra weight and cut down on food and added in cardio, I'm pretty happy with the way the rest of my body looks but there is zero change in the legs and it's killing me especially since it's summer and I can no longer ignore them in shorts and dresses They look like they belong on a sedentary woman twice my weight and age. I read that this fat is particularly resistant and am terrified that even if I lose the five lbs back, they're gonna come off from everywhere else instead and I'll end up even more disproportional than when I've started. Pictures attached of my upper and lower body so you can see the difference.
I know probably not much can be done besides what I'm already doing but just wanted to see if maybe anyone can offer advice or just commiserate. Big ask: please no patronizing comments like 'you look fine' or 'it's all in your head, you should talk to someone' etc, my looks are important to me and I want to be in amazing shape, not just 'look fine'. Thanks for reading!
I know probably not much can be done besides what I'm already doing but just wanted to see if maybe anyone can offer advice or just commiserate. Big ask: please no patronizing comments like 'you look fine' or 'it's all in your head, you should talk to someone' etc, my looks are important to me and I want to be in amazing shape, not just 'look fine'. Thanks for reading!
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Replies
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I can't commiserate, because I'm not seeing what you're seeing.
I'm sorry you're unhappy with your legs, but for now just lose the lbs you gained and stick to your workout regimen and see what happens. I'm not sure why you think you won't be able to get back to where you were. Why would you believe something you read over what you're body has actually achieved before?23 -
I'm not seeing what you're seeing, sorry. I can't imagine what you would think of my legs, if you think yours look old, chunky, and cellulite-ey
I'm sorry you're unhappy with your legs, but for now just lose the lbs you gained and stick to your workout regimen and see what happens. I'm not sure why you think you won't be able to get back to where you were. Why would you believe something you read over what you're body has actually achieved before?
Kimny72, I'm not comparing my legs to yours or anyone else's, only to the rest of my own body; you can see that on top I'm fairly lean and can see some muscle definition, whereas on my legs you can't even tell I've ever set foot in the gym - in spite of the fact that most of my heaviest lifts and time spent are on my legs.
The reason I'm worried is I've read that for women with stubborn lower body fat, every time you gain and lose weight you are likely to become more pear shaped as you gain it mostly in lower body but lose from all over. I've read a lot on Lyle McDonald's site, and he writes some scary stuff about women's lower body fat!
https://bodyrecomposition.com/page/10/?s=stubborn+fatYears ago I remember some women claiming that while their upper bodies leaned out, they swore their legs were getting fatter. I dismissed it as nonsense at the time but the above physiological facts lend support to that idea. A woman might be mobilizing fat from her upper body fine, yet storing some of that fat (or incoming calories from meals) in lower body fat later in the day. Upper body gets leaner, lower body gets fatter.
There was more info on it but I can't find the exact link right now. Point being, lower body fat is a royal *kitten* for women to lose11 -
Sorry. I don't see anything disproportionate.
I'm sure you see it but, I just don't21 -
How about going back to doing squats and deadlifts, which are an important part of any strength training program. You know what they say, don't skip leg day.11
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There is nothing disproportionate about your body that I see14
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I'm with the others. This is one of those things that women in particular torture themselves with. You look healthy and shapely. Your personal taste might prefer thigh gaps, but personal taste is all it is. Objectively, you've got fairly normal looking legs for a fit woman.12
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Your legs look fine. I don’t see what you see at all. You described something very different from the visual you posted.8
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I'm really not seeing the problem.2
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I think your legs look fine, I think you may be more comfortable with a thigh gap however that probably more of a genetic thing really. I was lucky and lost weight all over equally, I do have a thigh gap but not because i specifically trained for it, it is just my genetics. You have done brilliantly, ware your dresses and shorts with complete confidence knowing your legs are lovely.6
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Add me to the list of people who do not see a pair of legs that is disproportionate to the rest of her body. Instead, I see someone who has a beautiful figure that many females would envy.9
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nettiklive wrote: »Okay I know you can't spot reduce. But I just need to vent because I'm feeling really frustrated with my body. I am a pear shape. I maintained a constant weight I was happy with for over twelve years (intuitive eating, no logging, only loose mental tracking), I've always had thick legs and it's only at the very low end of the bmi range that they looked decent. Not super shapely but at least not fat. Well over this winter, probably due to my glass of wine habit going from twice a week to daily, I got distracted and gained 4-5 lbs. Doesn't sound like a big deal, except on my fairly lean small frame it is super noticeable particularly because it seems to literally all settle in my thighs! My hips and legs from the knee up look awful, chunky and cellulite-y. Two years ago I tried to start a very gradual recomp, with lifting - squats, deadlifts, loosely based on Stronglifts/ Strongcurves but not following the program to a T, and was very happy with my body a year ago. I've been trying to lose the extra weight and cut down on food and added in cardio, I'm pretty happy with the way the rest of my body looks but there is zero change in the legs and it's killing me especially since it's summer and I can no longer ignore them in shorts and dresses They look like they belong on a sedentary woman twice my weight and age. I read that this fat is particularly resistant and am terrified that even if I lose the five lbs back, they're gonna come off from everywhere else instead and I'll end up even more disproportional than when I've started. Pictures attached of my upper and lower body so you can see the difference.
I know probably not much can be done besides what I'm already doing but just wanted to see if maybe anyone can offer advice or just commiserate. Big ask: please no patronizing comments like 'you look fine' or 'it's all in your head, you should talk to someone' etc, my looks are important to me and I want to be in amazing shape, not just 'look fine'. Thanks for reading!
First off, stick with the recomp and the strength training. Genetics are going to play a part in how your weight is distributed, but it would be a shame to keep beating yourself up over 5lbs and a problem that exists largely in your own perception of yourself.
So close to a goal weight, log your food. Find out exactly how much you are eating and then create a small deficit. I just very recently started logging again myself because I need to lose this touch of belly fat and if I want to get to where I want to get to, I need to do what I need to do to get there.
Time - close to goal weight and a small deficit/or recomp takes effort and time. You already look good - don't give that up, but don't be unrealistic about expectations either. Eat enough to fuel your efforts and be good to yourself.
Lastly, have some fun with what you're doing. What's the point in doing all this work and being miserable? You did this before and you can do it again.
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Sometimes we look in the mirror and see things other people don't. This does not in any way invalidate those feelings, they're very real. That's how brains work. When people are saying they don't see what you see, they aren't being dismissive, they're just offering an outside perspective. Your feelings and insecurities are very real, which is why you need to understand them and deal with them. It's hard and takes a lot of mental work and time to accept that our brains play tricks.
This doesn't mean you shouldn't continue going to the gym, because if you learn to accept your shape you'll be working on tweaking it from a place of empowerment, not from a place of insecurity. Building muscle takes time, and you will definitely see changes in a few months/years. Working on self-acceptance also takes time, but you will hopefully see changes in a few months/years. I guess you have nothing but the best to look forward to.14 -
nettiklive wrote: »I'm not seeing what you're seeing, sorry. I can't imagine what you would think of my legs, if you think yours look old, chunky, and cellulite-ey
I'm sorry you're unhappy with your legs, but for now just lose the lbs you gained and stick to your workout regimen and see what happens. I'm not sure why you think you won't be able to get back to where you were. Why would you believe something you read over what you're body has actually achieved before?
Kimny72, I'm not comparing my legs to yours or anyone else's, only to the rest of my own body; you can see that on top I'm fairly lean and can see some muscle definition, whereas on my legs you can't even tell I've ever set foot in the gym - in spite of the fact that most of my heaviest lifts and time spent are on my legs.
The reason I'm worried is I've read that for women with stubborn lower body fat, every time you gain and lose weight you are likely to become more pear shaped as you gain it mostly in lower body but lose from all over. I've read a lot on Lyle McDonald's site, and he writes some scary stuff about women's lower body fat!
https://bodyrecomposition.com/page/10/?s=stubborn+fatYears ago I remember some women claiming that while their upper bodies leaned out, they swore their legs were getting fatter. I dismissed it as nonsense at the time but the above physiological facts lend support to that idea. A woman might be mobilizing fat from her upper body fine, yet storing some of that fat (or incoming calories from meals) in lower body fat later in the day. Upper body gets leaner, lower body gets fatter.
There was more info on it but I can't find the exact link right now. Point being, lower body fat is a royal *kitten* for women to lose
I actually edited my post before you posted this response specifically because I realized the line about myself was unnecessary. I do not see what you see, but your opinion of you is the one that counts, one way or the other.
Anyway, I still don't understand why you are believing something that may generally be true about women, rather than what you've actually seen on your body with your own eyes. The statement you quoted from Lyle's site is vague and theoretical. You are looking for reasons to panic. Stop that. You got there before, just do the same work and you'll get back there.
The aesthetic you prefer is very lean. I'm not judging, it just is. And you need to understand that if you want to live in that space, it can be difficult to maintain and it will be easy to put a little weight back on and have to re-lose it at times. You can't panic every time that happens or you are in for a stressful and damaging long haul.11 -
nettiklive wrote: »Okay I know you can't spot reduce. But I just need to vent because I'm feeling really frustrated with my body. I am a pear shape. I maintained a constant weight I was happy with for over twelve years (intuitive eating, no logging, only loose mental tracking), I've always had thick legs and it's only at the very low end of the bmi range that they looked decent. Not super shapely but at least not fat. Well over this winter, probably due to my glass of wine habit going from twice a week to daily, I got distracted and gained 4-5 lbs. Doesn't sound like a big deal, except on my fairly lean small frame it is super noticeable particularly because it seems to literally all settle in my thighs! My hips and legs from the knee up look awful, chunky and cellulite-y. Two years ago I tried to start a very gradual recomp, with lifting - squats, deadlifts, loosely based on Stronglifts/ Strongcurves but not following the program to a T, and was very happy with my body a year ago. I've been trying to lose the extra weight and cut down on food and added in cardio, I'm pretty happy with the way the rest of my body looks but there is zero change in the legs and it's killing me especially since it's summer and I can no longer ignore them in shorts and dresses They look like they belong on a sedentary woman twice my weight and age. I read that this fat is particularly resistant and am terrified that even if I lose the five lbs back, they're gonna come off from everywhere else instead and I'll end up even more disproportional than when I've started. Pictures attached of my upper and lower body so you can see the difference.
I know probably not much can be done besides what I'm already doing but just wanted to see if maybe anyone can offer advice or just commiserate. Big ask: please no patronizing comments like 'you look fine' or 'it's all in your head, you should talk to someone' etc, my looks are important to me and I want to be in amazing shape, not just 'look fine'. Thanks for reading!
First off, stick with the recomp and the strength training. Genetics are going to play a part in how your weight is distributed, but it would be a shame to keep beating yourself up over 5lbs and a problem that exists largely in your own perception of yourself.
So close to a goal weight, log your food. Find out exactly how much you are eating and then create a small deficit. I just very recently started logging again myself because I need to lose this touch of belly fat and if I want to get to where I want to get to, I need to do what I need to do to get there.
Time - close to goal weight and a small deficit/or recomp takes effort and time. You already look good - don't give that up, but don't be unrealistic about expectations either. Eat enough to fuel your efforts and be good to yourself.
Lastly, have some fun with what you're doing. What's the point in doing all this work and being miserable? You did this before and you can do it again.
This ^^^^^ Totally this.4 -
Your legs aren't super skinny but they aren't disproportionate at all.
I get that your looks matter to you and if you want your legs skinny then that's what you want. But you're the only one who sees what you see. Literally nobody else is looking at you and thinking about your legs that way. So at least let yourself wear shorts. The summer gets hot.11 -
As much as I know you don't want to hear it, your legs look very proportional to your body as well and your bodyfat levels. You look great. However I do understand being unsatisfied with certain areas and where fat comes off. I have seen many women with 6-pack abs and ripped upper body muscles who still have little definition on their lower body (who in my opinion look fabulous by the way), so you are not alone. I also carry more fat in my lower body, and for me building muscle has helped... so when I do lean down the muscle pops more as I lose. However I will likely always have fat on my thighs and below my glutes (unless maybe I get to competition leanness which is not a goal of mine) as well as cellulite. I have come to accept it and focus and embrace other parts such as my lean waist and upper body.
Get back to recomp, just be patient with yourself and keep your goals realistic.16 -
As much as I know you don't want to hear it, your legs look very proportional to your body as well and your bodyfat levels. You look great. However I do understand being unsatisfied with certain areas and where fat comes off. I have seen many women with 6-pack abs and ripped upper body muscles who still have little definition on their lower body (who in my opinion look fabulous by the way), so you are not alone. I also carry more fat in my lower body, and for me building muscle has helped... so when I do lean down the muscle pops more as I lose. However I will likely always have fat on my thighs and below my glutes (unless maybe I get to competition leanness which is not a goal of mine) as well as cellulite. I have come to accept it and focus and embrace other parts such as my lean waist and upper body.
Get back to recomp, just be patient with yourself and keep your goals realistic.
I completely agree with this. I'm one of those people whose upper body is leaner than their lower body. Even when I weighed 105 pounds, my thighs and lower body held more fat than my upper body. If I didn't read all the stickied threads here and general advice from forum veterans, I may have kept losing weight in the hopes that things would change.
However, since I did read all that information I know that body recomposition, and not scale weight, is the way to go. I'm currently gaining weight for the purpose of building muscle in my lower half. I know that flies in the face of most diet advice that's out there and building muscle can be a scary thing, especially for people who place a lot of value on scale weight, but it truly works.7 -
Lillymoo01 wrote: »Add me to the list of people who do not see a pair of legs that is disproportionate to the rest of her body. Instead, I see someone who has a beautiful figure that many females would envy.
AMEN SISTER!4 -
As much as I know you don't want to hear it, your legs look very proportional to your body as well and your bodyfat levels. You look great. However I do understand being unsatisfied with certain areas and where fat comes off. I have seen many women with 6-pack abs and ripped upper body muscles who still have little definition on their lower body (who in my opinion look fabulous by the way), so you are not alone. I also carry more fat in my lower body, and for me building muscle has helped... so when I do lean down the muscle pops more as I lose. However I will likely always have fat on my thighs and below my glutes (unless maybe I get to competition leanness which is not a goal of mine) as well as cellulite. I have come to accept it and focus and embrace other parts such as my lean waist and upper body.
Get back to recomp, just be patient with yourself and keep your goals realistic.
@sardelsa pretty much said everything I would say here. I commiserate with you not being happy with your legs. I'm one of those people above who could have a six pack and nary a hint of definition in my legs. But lifting has made them shaplier. You've been at weights and body composition you were happy with. If it's not too difficult, I would just target getting back there. If it's too much effort to maintain, then I'd work on the mental side. It's hard for us to see what others see. But you do look very normal and not overly unproportional.7 -
As I looked at your pics all I see is someone who is thin and if you become even more thin, you would look anorexic. I know how I feel and what I see how others feel and what they see doesn't matter. It's about how you feel and you see. I understand you want muscle definition in your legs, maybe genetically you can't achieve that. Maybe you can. One things for sure, losing more bodyfat is not the answer. There are many who are mad, envious and jealous of you and your comments because they want to be where you're at and cant get there15
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We are our own worst critics. It's taken me years to try to just make peace with my body being the way it is. Am I healthy? Can I do the things I want to do?
It's difficult because we might want to change our bodies to make them look a certain way but...it's not always possible without doing things that are challenging or even unhealthy. If you want to work on strengthening your lower body I agree squats....ballet is KILLER for the quads and butt...but also...just try loving your body? At least for me when I stress and am critical of myself, the stress makes my body weight even more stubborn.
Besides-We are more than our bodies.5 -
You look lovely. I’m sure many of us would be very happy to have your build.
Body image is a very hard thing to accept for many people. Acceptance can be very frustrating, but try to take some satisfaction in knowing that many people feel you look very inspirational.2 -
Your legs look very proportional to your body, coming from a petite woman. They look ideal actually. If you want to change the shape of them, you will need to lift weights for a while. This will gradually make them more muscular and "shapely". I can't promise it will make you look "thinner" though.
Maybe you'd feel better about the appearance in the short term if you experimented with some sunless tanner? It always makes me appear slimmer and more shapely. I couldn't recommend sunbeds, obviously. I particularly like the Banana Boat Summer Color, as a drugstore product it has performed quite well and looked quite natural on me, and I'm very pale naturally. You could also spend more on a professional airbrush if it is worth the money to you.9 -
You are, and will always be, your hardest critic. I won't tell you that you look fine, lovely, etc because you did ask us not to do so. But if you're looking for an exercise that does (kind of) target the legs, I'd suggest walking. That how I lost 99% of my weight (about 60 pounds now) with walking/hiking. I DO know that I have always had huge calves, it's hereditary, my mom was the same way. And I know that now my calves, while still a good size, as no longer these huge chunks of fat, but nice, well toned muscles. They might even measure the same circumference but they don't LOOK the same, and I'm finally happy with my legs. But... it's not something that will come about in a day, a week or even a month, it's something that does take time. Not just for the toning, but for your own "sight" to see past the size and realize "Hey... they actually DO look good!"4
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As I have read in many other threads recomp is a slow process. I read an article by Eric helms where he reckoned it took him 10 plus years to build some serious mass in his quads. I think you need to just keep training. Maybe think about whether the programme you are following has enough leg volume. I’ve been strength training properly for 2 years and still don’t see a lot of definition in my legs. It’s frustrating. I’ve seen a bit of quad definition recently since switching to a 4 day upper/lower split but I know other regular posters have been pleased with their results on a full body programme. Sorry not to have a quick solution for you.1
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I would love your legs.1
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I think I get what you are saying. I carry most of my fat on my legs. When I weighed 110 I had my body fat calculated at a gym and they measured my legs 3 times because they didn't believe what they were seeing. It's genetic and I hate it. That being said, all I can do is maintain a proper body weight and do strength training. I tend to focus more on my legs because of carrying such a high amount of fat. I've learned to love my legs because of what they can do - I ran 26.2 miles, 13.1 multiple times. I'm a nurse and walk at least 5 miles a day on my job. Learn to embrace them and improve what you can. Don't obsess10
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I think your legs look great! We are definitely more critical of ourselves, keep up whatever you're doing!
I can commiserate as I'm a pear shape too. I've been a medium on top for awhile but my bottom half is double the size pants most people are at my weight. I'm never going to be able to shrink my hip bones and will probably never be 100% happy with my thighs, but am gaining muscle, losing weight, and working on self-acceptance. It's not easy and I know I'm more critical of my body than anyone else is of me which is why I'm working on my mental outlook.3 -
nice legs though, you are overthinking a little. IT can happen to someone who had problems with weight before.2
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