Self Sabotage

quiksylver296

GU0679T wrote: »

I found inspiration reading this. I maintain my weight but would like to lose. I'm going to try pre logging food. Seemed to be fun when I did it previously. Would find I need extra calories at end of day. I would eat it hour before bed. Probably not good

It's totally fine. Weight loss is about the total number of calories you eat, not what time you eat them. I eat right before bed every single night. Hasn't slowed me down in the least.

AnnPT77

JordanS9592 wrote: »

@cmriverside I appreciate that, but what I’m saying is I usually turn one day into every day quickly. I’m trying to turn it around this time before it gets out of hand. My calorie goal is not too low, as I lose about 2 pounds per week at 328 pounds with an intense 6 day exercise regimen.

I'm going to go all squishy and psychological here. Think about the bolded: "I usually", "I'm trying".

Self-definition is really important. Subtle, but important.

Can you find "I used to" (instead of "I usually") and "I'm going to" (instead of "I'm trying"), as a way to think about it? (In addition to the actually actionable things others have suggested, of course, which are very smart.)

One day is a drop in the ocean, as long as we don't follow up by pumping more into the ocean with a giant firehose.

You decided to eat more than usual one day. That's all. It's no big deal. It's just food, not a moral failing.

Read your OP again:

JordanS9592 wrote: »

Confession time. In my comfort zone, I am lazy, and I eat like a ravenous beast. After losing 14 pounds, I gave myself “permission” to eat whatever I wanted for a day on Sunday. This was stupid for me, because this is how I blew it the last time I lost 60 pounds and gained it all back. I can see the cycle repeating itself, as this week, it has been exceedingly harder to say no to the foods that make me gain weight. Case in point, I went over my calories yesterday by 2000, and skipped working out for the first time in over a month. I can already feel a layer of fat growing from the binge yesterday. These are the most discouraging times for me, and the hardest to overcome. I’m grateful to have this community for support I didn’t have before. I make no excuses. I take full blame for my own failure. Now I want to move forward. Any words of encouragement or advice are greatly appreciated.

Would you talk about a close friend that way (lazy-ravenous beast-stupid-blew it-blame-failure)? Is talking about yourself this way helping you?

"I am lazy". No, you're not. You've been doing a great job being accountable, and you've lost fourteen pounds.

"I skipped working out for the first time in a month". No, you took one rest day, which is a good plan. It's not the first time in a month, it's the only time in a month! (Rest days are good thing, now and then; just not every day. ).

Over and over in your post, it sounds like you're focusing on the (perceived) slippery slope under your feet, and you're imagining yourself slipping, imagining it so vividly you can almost feel it, it almost feels certain . . . .

No. Just No. Stop catastrophizing. (Easy to say, but if you're going to do it, gotta start with saying it.)

Don't "take full blame for your own failure". Just resume your normal healthy routine. Since it isn't failure, blame is irrelevant (burns no extra calories, either ).

This is new-Jordan operating here, not old-Jordan. Just return to your normal healthy routine. Habits are habits because we do them.

Your healthy routine can change, you can take a diet break, whatever: You make choices, going forward, in your own self-interest. What you used to do is irrelevant as a focus. You're not that Jordan anymore. It'll be fine, because you're taking responsibility for making change in your life. You're making good decisions, and taking the actions to support them.

Best wishes! :flowerforyou:

TheChristianSimone

Hmm everyone has said nice things but honestly the real core thing is figuring out why you allow yourself to binge eat and go backwards. Once that is removed then you can go forward.

HeatherLeAnn622

The all-or-nothing mentality is something I've fought for years. I used to think that if I had a "bad" food day, that I should just throw in the towel for the rest of the week and "start over" next week. Now, I have learned to just log it and get back on track the very next meal. See the big picture like some others have said. The math will show you that in the grand scheme, you're probably still in a deficit or at maintenance. And even if not, oh well! Oh, and DO NOT weigh yourself for at least a week after a binge or heavy calorie day. Water retention is a thing and it's a spirit-killer. It's so hard, but I have a feeling you're going to beat this.

tinkerbellang83

HeatherLeAnn622 wrote: »

The all-or-nothing mentality is something I've fought for years. I used to think that if I had a "bad" food day, that I should just throw in the towel for the rest of the week and "start over" next week. Now, I have learned to just log it and get back on track the very next meal. See the big picture like some others have said. The math will show you that in the grand scheme, you're probably still in a deficit or at maintenance. And even if not, oh well! Oh, and DO NOT weigh yourself for at least a week after a binge or heavy calorie day. Water retention is a thing and it's a spirit-killer. It's so hard, but I have a feeling you're going to beat this.

Maybe that's right for you but weighing daily is actually what stopped it from being a spirit-killer for me (and many others here), once I started to see how normal water retention it helped me not to freak out over the fluctuations, I started to realise that logically I had not eaten 14000 calories above maintenance that would be necessary for to have gained 4lbs in fat and instead learned to trust the process.

HeatherLeAnn622

tinkerbellang83 wrote: »

HeatherLeAnn622 wrote: »

The all-or-nothing mentality is something I've fought for years. I used to think that if I had a "bad" food day, that I should just throw in the towel for the rest of the week and "start over" next week. Now, I have learned to just log it and get back on track the very next meal. See the big picture like some others have said. The math will show you that in the grand scheme, you're probably still in a deficit or at maintenance. And even if not, oh well! Oh, and DO NOT weigh yourself for at least a week after a binge or heavy calorie day. Water retention is a thing and it's a spirit-killer. It's so hard, but I have a feeling you're going to beat this.

Maybe that's right for you but weighing daily is actually what stopped it from being a spirit-killer for me (and many others here), once I started to see how normal water retention it helped me not to freak out over the fluctuations, I started to realise that logically I had not eaten 14000 calories above maintenance that would be necessary for to have gained 4lbs in fat and instead learned to trust the process.

That's great that it helps you and many others. I guess I was just speaking to the fact that the OP said she could literally "feel a layer of fat developing " after one night of extra caloric intake. That, to me, speaks to a mentality that they truly believe they can gain fat from a one-time binge, which isn't the case. Obviously, I'm no expert or doctor, so yes, to each their own. Thanks for your insight.