Bigger is better ?

13

Replies

  • DarrenGreens10
    DarrenGreens10 Posts: 30 Member
    Good

    Good reply’s I’m not trolling and I don’t discuss the gym most bodybuilders have no personality I’m much more imaginative and have many interest I never discuss gym doesn’t excite me I love lifting heavy and as a result from lifting I gained some muscle big deal.

    My hands are big and extremely wide thick my fingers etc. when I shake hands people comment on it

    But

    my point is I’ve tried and tried chatting with women doing most the conversation as some just again are very bland in reply’s no excitement however some have clicked but from what I notice just actually being a bigger guy seems somewhat of a turn of even if your personality is amazing or whatever

    main sites are tinder pof so probably why it hadn’t worked out the best lol
  • DarrenGreens10
    DarrenGreens10 Posts: 30 Member
    I don’t fully judge women on looks ideally someone who keeps fit but nobody who’s complete obsessed don’t like that tbh so probably picky
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    @_Miss_chievous_
    Oh Gawd... I'm just laughing so hard. I got nothing.

    same girllllllllllll :D
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *
  • AriesFL
    AriesFL Posts: 810 Member
    Good

    Good reply’s I’m not trolling and I don’t discuss the gym most bodybuilders have no personality I’m much more imaginative and have many interest I never discuss gym doesn’t excite me I love lifting heavy and as a result from lifting I gained some muscle big deal.

    My hands are big and extremely wide thick my fingers etc. when I shake hands people comment on it

    But

    my point is I’ve tried and tried chatting with women doing most the conversation as some just again are very bland in reply’s no excitement however some have clicked but from what I notice just actually being a bigger guy seems somewhat of a turn of even if your personality is amazing or whatever

    main sites are tinder pof so probably why it hadn’t worked out the best lol

    Try Bumble. I bet you will get better results on there. POF has a lot of fake profiles and sex bots.
  • bojack5
    bojack5 Posts: 2,859 Member
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    Good

    Good reply’s I’m not trolling and I don’t discuss the gym most bodybuilders have no personality I’m much more imaginative and have many interest I never discuss gym doesn’t excite me I love lifting heavy and as a result from lifting I gained some muscle big deal.

    My hands are big and extremely wide thick my fingers etc. when I shake hands people comment on it

    But

    my point is I’ve tried and tried chatting with women doing most the conversation as some just again are very bland in reply’s no excitement however some have clicked but from what I notice just actually being a bigger guy seems somewhat of a turn of even if your personality is amazing or whatever

    main sites are tinder pof so probably why it hadn’t worked out the best lol


    I just read the last part where you’re finding these chicks online, get off of that garbage! Online is mostly where the socially awkward people are at, hello. That’s why the conversations are bland.

    Get off the sites, your problem will be solved fast.

    Everyone I’ve ever met was through a friend or a friend of a friend.. the mall even, my last dude I found at a Portuguese parade. We were eyeing each other and bam. Go out and spark a convo.



  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    swedish is not your first language - papi - however everything else is a possiblity ;)
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    Your accent is not Swedish. You can’t fool a Swede!

  • Unknown
    edited December 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • Pupnuzz
    Pupnuzz Posts: 203 Member
    1sphere wrote: »
    plot twist; every female on earth over 25 is taken. I’m apprehensive myself, I don’t see many “single and interested” ladies

    Come to New Zealand then haha
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    Your accent is not Swedish. You can’t fool a Swede!

    with all due respect beautiful - you are so not a swede :smiley:
  • RunnerGirl238
    RunnerGirl238 Posts: 448 Member
    edited December 2019
    Posted too early cause I don’t know how to internet.

  • RunnerGirl238
    RunnerGirl238 Posts: 448 Member
    Also, curve ball: anyone who says they aren’t into looks is lying. We are mammals. 100% of us are into looks;however, the looks we are attracted to differ greatly. Bigger will be better for some and not others.
  • RunnerGirl238
    RunnerGirl238 Posts: 448 Member
    edited December 2019
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!
  • jenTucker11
    jenTucker11 Posts: 10 Member
    I have to agree with @RunnerGirl238.....we are all animals and physically attracted to a certain type of person. Looks, smells, mannerisms...and when people physically change over time, well...sometimes love is there but attraction fades. Love is what separates us from animals....but that really is the only difference.
  • Pupnuzz
    Pupnuzz Posts: 203 Member
    Well. I prefer personality over looks and have gone with people who wouldn't typically be my "type" because of said personality.
    So no, I don't think "everyone" is focused on looks.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
    Also, curve ball: anyone who says they aren’t into looks is lying. We are mammals. 100% of us are into looks;however, the looks we are attracted to differ greatly. Bigger will be better for some and not others.

    I knew a guy several years ago who was catfished by a girl in a chatroom where I was a moderator, which was devoted to a particular online game. This happened much earlier in the history of the internet when the average internet user was less sophisticated and there wasn’t even a word for cat-fishing yet. The girl stole a bunch of photos from a model’s personal page and emailed them to the guy at regular intervals claiming they were her. They chatted round the clock. He said were In love; he believed they were soulmates. Eventually things progressed to the point that he wanted to meet face to face. She freaked out and ghosted him. However, she eventually returned and agreed to a visit; he flew cross country to meet her. It turned out her reluctance to meet was due to her having severe facial and spinal deformities. He dropped into the chatroom to share the truth and explode about how he had been duped and he couldn’t believe he had been so stupid. He wanted to know if we could ban her from the service.

    We didn’t hear from either one of them for a while after that. When we did hear from them again, they were married. It took him all of two days to come around and realize he understood and forgave her reasons for concealing her true appearance and that it didn’t matter to him, because she was still the person whose words he had fallen in love with.

    True story. Really! Not a Lifetime movie.

    Almost everyone is into looks as a first impression; however, some people are able to look beyond them, given sufficient motivation. Personally I don’t think I could ever look beyond severe facial deformities, but a lot of people with them are in relationships and married, and I don’t think it’s because they managed to find the one in a million person who is attracted to their specific condition. It’s because they found someone who is attracted to the rest of them.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!

    I will own my disagree for the sake of your curiosity.

    I disagree with you because in EVERY relationship I have had, it was never once dictated by what they looked like. Their personality or humor is what drew me into their presence (sometimes to my detriment). I have not been one to be gravitated to a person's looks and maybe that's because I think so poorly of myself that physical traits don't play into my attraction factor at all.

    Now do I notice things I find admirable or attractive (in general) on people on the street? Sure, but that doesn't persuade or encourage me to engage them in conversation or even give them the time of day.

    I get that I might be an outlier, though. I dunno.
  • _sw33tp3a_11
    _sw33tp3a_11 Posts: 4,692 Member
    edited December 2019
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!

    You weren't kidding.

    I agree with your statement though. Maybe people don't want to feel like they are vain? Makes them feel less than if admitting that looks play a part (not all) in attraction? Whatever reasoning they have for disagreeing with you, That's on them. And this might sound very assumptious of me but most of us dont see ourselves in a great light and try to the others in a deeper sense that physically, that's the last thing they see.
  • RunnerGirl238
    RunnerGirl238 Posts: 448 Member
    Also, curve ball: anyone who says they aren’t into looks is lying. We are mammals. 100% of us are into looks;however, the looks we are attracted to differ greatly. Bigger will be better for some and not others.

    I knew a guy several years ago who was catfished by a girl in a chatroom where I was a moderator, which was devoted to a particular online game. This happened much earlier in the history of the internet when the average internet user was less sophisticated and there wasn’t even a word for cat-fishing yet. The girl stole a bunch of photos from a model’s personal page and emailed them to the guy at regular intervals claiming they were her. They chatted round the clock. He said were In love; he believed they were soulmates. Eventually things progressed to the point that he wanted to meet face to face. She freaked out and ghosted him. However, she eventually returned and agreed to a visit; he flew cross country to meet her. It turned out her reluctance to meet was due to her having severe facial and spinal deformities. He dropped into the chatroom to share the truth and explode about how he had been duped and he couldn’t believe he had been so stupid. He wanted to know if we could ban her from the service.

    We didn’t hear from either one of them for a while after that. When we did hear from them again, they were married. It took him all of two days to come around and realize he understood and forgave her reasons for concealing her true appearance and that it didn’t matter to him, because she was still the person whose words he had fallen in love with.

    True story. Really! Not a Lifetime movie.

    Almost everyone is into looks as a first impression; however, some people are able to look beyond them, given sufficient motivation. Personally I don’t think I could ever look beyond severe facial deformities, but a lot of people with them are in relationships and married, and I don’t think it’s because they managed to find the one in a million person who is attracted to their specific condition. It’s because they found someone who is attracted to the rest of them.

    So falling for someone you are attracted is not ok but falling for someone who lies to you for months and steals someone else’s personage is? Interesting.

    I will say, if I am at a party speaking to a person I will probably be more interested in their conversation and intelligence. However, in order for...progression...I would most definitely have t be attracted to them.

  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!

    I will own my disagree for the sake of your curiosity.

    I disagree with you because in EVERY relationship I have had, it was never once dictated by what they looked like. Their personality or humor is what drew me into their presence (sometimes to my detriment). I have not been one to be gravitated to a person's looks and maybe that's because I think so poorly of myself that physical traits don't play into my attraction factor at all.

    Now do I notice things I find admirable or attractive (in general) on people on the street? Sure, but that doesn't persuade or encourage me to engage them in conversation or even give them the time of day.

    I get that I might be an outlier, though. I dunno.

    So you're telling me there's a chance ???
  • Womanvsweight
    Womanvsweight Posts: 258 Member
    Have to admit I had to have the whole package, personality and physical attraction are just as important as each other and there’s nothing wrong with that!

    I’ve been out with guys that are big and small, unattractive to me but had a great chemistry with me, mr. Universe loves lookiny at himself more than me, some loud some quiet shy or confident intelligent or numb as a fish to figure out what I wanted .. you have to meet a lot of people to find your balance of perfection, don’t waste time on f you’re not sure then end it right away and move on, just be available incase the right one comes along 👍
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    edited December 2019
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!

    Initially, and naturally people are attracted to beautiful things, and people. I think the point people are making is that- it takes more than looks to keep someone

    There’s been times where I thought someone was highly attractive until they talked.

    Then there’s been times when I thought ew hell no, never... until I got to know him. All of a sudden he’s so sexy because his cute lil mannerisms, the way he walks into a room, his ambition. I think it’s possible to be blinded by love when you fall for someone.

    I have boundaries and there’s physical traits I can’t look past even if I tried though.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Hahahaha so not a popular opinion, huh? Why the disagreement? I’m interested. Biology usually dictates this stuff. We search for suitable partners based on really chemical and biological reactions and that is connected to what we see. Debate time: let’s go!

    I will own my disagree for the sake of your curiosity.

    I disagree with you because in EVERY relationship I have had, it was never once dictated by what they looked like. Their personality or humor is what drew me into their presence (sometimes to my detriment). I have not been one to be gravitated to a person's looks and maybe that's because I think so poorly of myself that physical traits don't play into my attraction factor at all.

    Now do I notice things I find admirable or attractive (in general) on people on the street? Sure, but that doesn't persuade or encourage me to engage them in conversation or even give them the time of day.

    I get that I might be an outlier, though. I dunno.

    So you're telling me there's a chance ???

    I have never stated otherwise. :wink:
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    I'm going to play some Devils advocate here for a second...

    Is there really any difference in liking someone based on their looks and liking someone because they are funny?

    I mean funny is not a virtue, nor some type of ethic... A complete jerk or smart *kitten* can be "funny" and most often are...
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    Your accent is not Swedish. You can’t fool a Swede!

    with all due respect beautiful - you are so not a swede :smiley:

    Actually I’m half Swedish. My mom is from Goteborg, I have been to Sweden, and I just spoke to my cousin today so I know the Swedish accent.

    Her comment confused me. I don’t understand why she said that.
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    Your accent is not Swedish. You can’t fool a Swede!

    with all due respect beautiful - you are so not a swede :smiley:

    Actually I’m half Swedish. My mom is from Goteborg, I have been to Sweden, and I just spoke to my cousin today so I know the Swedish accent.

    i never would have guessed it ! my apologies for thinking otherwise :)
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    bojack5 wrote: »
    in reply to OP : i've been married for 31 years to the same man who is 6'3" with a swimmer build. i've dated men before him who were super buff, heavy, skinny , shorter, taller, less handsome, more handsome, less intelligent, more intelligent!

    the bottom line is though - personality, the ability to make me laugh, manners, intelligence, compassion, and a generous heart are more of a turn on to me than looks. when you get to be my age, looks are superficial. what's critical never fades imho.

    *oh and he has an accent. that was the golden key - oops :D *

    Hmmm....an accent you say....i have a tinge of a swedish accent ;) and im also a mixture of every good/bad trait a man can have ;)

    Your accent is not Swedish. You can’t fool a Swede!

    with all due respect beautiful - you are so not a swede :smiley:

    Actually I’m half Swedish. My mom is from Goteborg, I have been to Sweden, and I just spoke to my cousin today so I know the Swedish accent.

    i never would have guessed it ! my apologies for thinking otherwise :)

    No problem. My other half confuses people. But, I represent both sides!