For the men who tell women to smile.....

2

Replies

  • deputy_randolph
    deputy_randolph Posts: 940 Member
    Do Dudes really do this?

    I feel like this thread is just complaining about something that almost never happens...

    If one or two guys do this, the rest of us can't explain or apologize for it...

    And Eta... I've been told that I should smile more than I've ever told anyone else to smile... So it's not a guy thing... But then again I'm talking about selfies here I suppose

    Happens maybe once every few months to me...moronic flirting. I look like a total B and not friendly. It probably happens more often to other women (more "approachable" looking).
  • Mr_Healthy_Habits
    Mr_Healthy_Habits Posts: 12,588 Member
    OK I guess I can see older Dudes doing it, just have a hard time believing it happens, however I'll take your word on it...

    And I get it, it does comes off as chauvinistic...

    Like why don't you go make me a sandwich while you're at it... 😂
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  • Buff_Man
    Buff_Man Posts: 623 Member
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    Just_Mel_ wrote: »
    Proud member of the RBF club here.
    Smiling gives you wrinkles....RBF keeps you looking young. It's science.

    Dis

    don't think this is the green light to take off your smiley PP now :D
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    Buff_Man wrote: »
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this

    nah - it's creepy dudes in general
  • _sw33tp3a_11
    _sw33tp3a_11 Posts: 4,692 Member
    Just_Mel_ wrote: »
    Proud member of the RBF club here.
    Smiling gives you wrinkles....RBF keeps you looking young. It's science.

    Dis

    don't think this is the green light to take off your smiley PP now :D

    I was thinking about it but I'm still happy 😁
  • AriesFL
    AriesFL Posts: 810 Member
    I think some guys think they are being clever and witty when they say that.
  • Gaygirl2120
    Gaygirl2120 Posts: 541 Member
    AriesFL wrote: »
    I think some guys think they are being clever and witty when they say that.

    Sadly they do. All they get is an eye roll from me.
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  • cdubks88
    cdubks88 Posts: 3,573 Member
    cdubks88 wrote: »
    1. Some men objectify women.
    2. Some women seek attention, negative or positive.
    3. Not all men belong to #1.
    4. Not all women belong to #2.

    5. Some women objectify themselves
    6. Some men objectify themselves
    7. Some people chose to objectify
    8. Its called being human

    😋 not trying to argue just stating my opinion for all its worth

    No worries. I can appreciate what you said.

    I was just saying it's unfair to lump anyone into groups like that....because we are just what you said....humans....individuals. 😊
  • Gaygirl2120
    Gaygirl2120 Posts: 541 Member
    Jax2120 wrote: »
    Buff_Man wrote: »
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this

    nah - it's creepy dudes in general

    But was this behaviour considered creepy back in the day ? Or was it just 'how people behaved'.

    Look back on some of the old footage from 'older' movies and tv programmes thats now considered 'creepy' but looking back it appears that women were complacent with that type of behaviour...am I wrong??

    Even now, with all the changes, I see images and women offering themselves up as something to be ogled at.

    But at same time, asking men to behave differently towards them. The images and messages sent out from women are ' I want attention'

    Do they care if it's positive or negative? Who is to say what is the correct response? Females have to take their responsibility in all this....

    So if I’m at the grocery store minding my own business. Literally not even making eye contact with anyone and a random dude tells me to “Smile” it’s my fault? Lol wow! Mind you I’m gay as hell and men are the last ones I would seek attention from 😂 But ok....

    In my mind it all goes back to one thing,

    You can control what you do, not what other people do. You can choose your response.

    Be the change you want to see in the world. Instead of beating these people over the head, how can you change their perception? You have a chance to change their outlook....tell them you dont want to be asked to smile and ask them why they are asking you to smile?

    Stay curious instead of judgmental.

    I am totally sympathetic with you btw, but there is always a reason for someones behaviour, ask them. 😋

    When I have time I do engage people and ask them why they do certain things. I actually asked a male friend why they do this to women and not men. They said because they will do it to a woman they are attracted to and not to men because they would “seem gay” 🙄 So I was like “So it’s more about you being flirty than actually being concerned about someone being sad because if that was the case you would tell men as well.” He got pretty quiet lol.
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    Buff_Man wrote: »
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this

    nah - it's creepy dudes in general

    But was this behaviour considered creepy back in the day ? Or was it just 'how people behaved'.

    Look back on some of the old footage from 'older' movies and tv programmes thats now considered 'creepy' but looking back it appears that women were complacent with that type of behaviour...am I wrong??

    Even now, with all the changes, I see images and women offering themselves up as something to be ogled at.

    But at same time, asking men to behave differently towards them. The images and messages sent out from women are ' I want attention'

    Do they care if it's positive or negative? Who is to say what is the correct response? Females have to take their responsibility in all this....

    How so?
  • _Miss_chievous_
    _Miss_chievous_ Posts: 2,765 Member
    If it bothers you when random strangers do this, the perfect comeback is to say, “Thanks, my father died this morning and I’m on my way to talk with the funeral director, but thanks to you telling me how to act I feel all better now.”

    my comeback is *go *kitten* yourself* :D

    I love you and your potty mouth 🥰😘
  • mi_nina_lola
    mi_nina_lola Posts: 767 Member
    If it bothers you when random strangers do this, the perfect comeback is to say, “Thanks, my father died this morning and I’m on my way to talk with the funeral director, but thanks to you telling me how to act I feel all better now.”

    my comeback is *go *kitten* yourself* :D

    I love you and your potty mouth 🥰😘

    i love you and i know it was YOU who was *inspired* ;)<3
  • vanityy99
    vanityy99 Posts: 2,583 Member
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    Buff_Man wrote: »
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this

    nah - it's creepy dudes in general

    But was this behaviour considered creepy back in the day ? Or was it just 'how people behaved'.

    Look back on some of the old footage from 'older' movies and tv programmes thats now considered 'creepy' but looking back it appears that women were complacent with that type of behaviour...am I wrong??

    Even now, with all the changes, I see images and women offering themselves up as something to be ogled at.

    But at same time, asking men to behave differently towards them. The images and messages sent out from women are ' I want attention'

    Do they care if it's positive or negative? Who is to say what is the correct response? Females have to take their responsibility in all this....

    How so?

    I couldn't possibly post any evidence. It would get me banned.

    Point proven.

    Do you mean like, when women dress a certain way?
  • _Miss_chievous_
    _Miss_chievous_ Posts: 2,765 Member
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    vanityy99 wrote: »
    Buff_Man wrote: »
    It's creepy old dudes I think that would do this

    nah - it's creepy dudes in general

    But was this behaviour considered creepy back in the day ? Or was it just 'how people behaved'.

    Look back on some of the old footage from 'older' movies and tv programmes thats now considered 'creepy' but looking back it appears that women were complacent with that type of behaviour...am I wrong??

    Even now, with all the changes, I see images and women offering themselves up as something to be ogled at.

    But at same time, asking men to behave differently towards them. The images and messages sent out from women are ' I want attention'

    Do they care if it's positive or negative? Who is to say what is the correct response? Females have to take their responsibility in all this....

    How so?

    I couldn't possibly post any evidence. It would get me banned.

    Point proven.

    Do you mean like, when women dress a certain way?

    I think it's obvious, no?
  • TwitchyMacGee
    TwitchyMacGee Posts: 3,120 Member
    Woah. State an opinion on here, and all the disagrees can't have the balls to state thier case...ok then hahahaha.

    Why am I not smiling right now?

    I didn’t click disagree but i do.
  • TwitchyMacGee
    TwitchyMacGee Posts: 3,120 Member
    Woah. State an opinion on here, and all the disagrees can't have the balls to state thier case...ok then hahahaha.

    Why am I not smiling right now?

    I didn’t click disagree but i do.

    What do you disagree with ?

    If i am awake and clearheaded and up for that kind of conversation tomorrow I’ll discuss it with you.
  • TwitchyMacGee
    TwitchyMacGee Posts: 3,120 Member
    Woah. State an opinion on here, and all the disagrees can't have the balls to state thier case...ok then hahahaha.

    Why am I not smiling right now?

    I didn’t click disagree but i do.

    What do you disagree with ?

    If i am awake and clearheaded and up for that kind of conversation tomorrow I’ll discuss it with you.

    Tease.

    Good. I’m glad you understand there’s no ill will here. ❤️
  • Tinydancer106
    Tinydancer106 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Just_Mel_ wrote: »
    Proud member of the RBF club here.
    Smiling gives you wrinkles....RBF keeps you looking young. It's science.

    Dis

    don't think this is the green light to take off your smiley PP now :D

    I was thinking about it but I'm still happy 😁

    I like you happy😍🤗
  • TwitchyMacGee
    TwitchyMacGee Posts: 3,120 Member
    Woah. State an opinion on here, and all the disagrees can't have the balls to state thier case...ok then hahahaha.

    Why am I not smiling right now?

    I didn’t click disagree but i do.

    What do you disagree with ?

    If i am awake and clearheaded and up for that kind of conversation tomorrow I’ll discuss it with you.

    Tease.

    Good. I’m glad you understand there’s no ill will here. ❤️

    😂😂😂😂😂😂

    😂from ME. 🤣 no ill will from me.
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    @Tinydancer106
    your PP is hot!!
    (for real - adore!!)
    Super cool pic:heart:

    current thread topic..
    ..don't smile...you a sexy, girly pretty with a tear
    Adore❣
  • Tinydancer106
    Tinydancer106 Posts: 3,678 Member
    Vikka_V wrote: »
    @Tinydancer106
    your PP is hot!!
    (for real - adore!!)
    Super cool pic:heart:

    current thread topic..
    ..don't smile...you a sexy, girly pretty with a tear
    Adore❣

    Lol thank you sweet and lovely @Vikka_V
    Your Pic is always gorgeous!💕😍

    But ya it's like the old song says it's my PP and I'll cry if I want to!....😁😉😎🤘...or😢
    (My choices *kitten* 🤗)

    (But ok really it is just my ode to Tom Brady leaving my Patriots 😒)
  • bojack5
    bojack5 Posts: 2,859 Member
    Smiling to me is a personal thing. It comes very easy to me in day to day interaction without even noticing. But im not one to stare at my phone and conjure up a fake smile for a selfie......if i smile its real and not because i had to say to myself....."smile". With that being said, if I wont do that to myself, would never do that to anyone else either. I am also in the opinion that smiles dont necessarily make everyone look better either.