Ate a cheat meal and feel so guilty. Ruined my diet.

Raemie25

I've been excellent, food wise for 5 weeks, exercised 5 days a week and today I ate a beef curry and rice from a Chinese takeaway. I feel like I've ruined everything. I dont know why I caved.

deannalfisher

whta's wrong with beef curry and rice?

Raemie25

From a takeaway though, didnt cook it myself. No doubt it was loaded with calories.

Shortgirlrunning

Weight loss is about persistence, not perfection. So what? You had one calorie heavy meal - it’s not going to undo weeks worth of work and it didn’t ruin anything. So you just let it go and keep working toward your goal.

sardelsa

Why do you feel guilty? Did you significantly go over your calories? One day of going over will not ruin everything just stick to your calories the next day. Food guilt is not very helpful for success, if anything it can make reaching your goals and maintaining weight much more difficult.

Jruzer

It's one meal. Most of us who have lost weight and kept it off have occasional big meals. It didn't ruin anything, unless you let it.

harper16

Raemie25 wrote: »

From a takeaway though, didnt cook it myself. No doubt it was loaded with calories.

So, log it, forget it, and move on. You didn't ruin anything from one meal. If you like curry and rice work it into your calories. Weight loss is caused by being in a calorie deficit. You can eat foods you like and still lose weight.

KrissFlavored

I watched a video of a girl who lost over 150lbs and then she decided to eat the way she used to at 300lbs for a day and then show people how 1 day doesnt do anything.

She ate all day, including a whole large pizza to herself and got on the scale at the end and showed her weight, she was up... after a couple days she weighed in and was lower then her starting weight.

You had some rice and beef.... she ate like a 300lbs girl, she was fine, so are you.

ExistingFish

You didn't gain all your weight in one day, you won't lose it all in one day - and one day will not your diet ruin.

It takes 3,500 calories to gain ONE pound. You might eat 3,500 calories in one day, but your body uses at least half of them - so that won't even make you gain a single pound.

FWIW, I took a day off logging yesterday and had the lowest weight I've had in a week this morning.

brittanystebbins95

This kind of "all or nothing" mindset is what has sent me spiraling away from weight loss and back to weight gain in the past. I would feel awful about "ruining my diet" and would think to myself, "Well, today is already ruined, might as well make it worthwhile and enjoy the rest of the day" followed by a binge and more guilt.
The hopelessness and guilt you feel from indulging is not healthy. Nobody's diet is going to be perfect every single day. You're human. And this should be about making permanent lifestyle changes so that it is sustainable, not depriving yourself for a period of time until you hit your goals and then returning to your prior lifestyle.
Were you planning on never eating Chinese takeaway ever again? No?
It's okay to indulge now and then.
Don't think of food as "bad" or "off limits" because you're just setting yourself up for what you're feeling now. You can still enjoy certain things, in moderation, without derailing you progress.
Eating takeaway once in awhile is not going to ruin your progress.

Diatonic12

Raemie25 wrote: »

I've been excellent, food wise for 5 weeks, exercised 5 days a week and today I ate a beef curry and rice from a Chinese takeaway. I feel like I've ruined everything. I dont know why I caved.

It's common practice to think of food and dieting in all or nothing terms. It's the Shock and Awe approach to food.
Doing things we don't want to do and eating things perfectly all in the name of weight loss is the recipe for eating it all back.

Perfectionism with food and exercise is overcompensating. There are stats and you can do your own research that the All or Nothing/ Shock and Awe approach seldom lasts beyond the 2 year mark. Even those with large weight losses using various means eat it all back after 2 years. The brain is the major driver in this process. Those old neural pathways aren't easily retrained. So edge your way down slowly.

We really can learn to moderate ourselves with food and it begins by stopping the All or Nothing, Shock and Awe approach to food and exercise. Eat foods you like and moderate your portions. The brain will believe anything you tell it over and over again. This usually starts in childhood or teenage years. We watch others unable to moderate their portions and we believe we can't either but we can. It's going to take some thoughtful choices on a daily basis for months and months turning into years of time.

Willpower is a limited resource. It burns out. Your brain is going to take you right back to the foods you've always enjoyed. So work with the brain and moderate, moderate, moderate. At the two year mark you'll still be standing with food and weight stability under your belt.

gallicinvasion

Are you going to give up beef curry and rice forever? If you like beef curry and rice, don’t create a way-of-eating that doesn’t allow beef curry and rice. Build the food into your plan!

1st, you have to learn a good and easy way to log beef curry and rice in your food diary. Do you have a food scale? The easiest way I can think of is finding a MFP food entry for beef curry that is measured in grams (that looks reasonable, and not like, 100 calories for 500 g or something). That will be the entry you use. Next time, weigh your portion of curry in grams so you can enter it in your diary. Then find a “white rice, cooked” entry that looks reasonable, measured in grams. Weigh and enter. These will be the entries you always use to log your order. Commit yourself to always logging any takeout you eat, even if it’s way over your calories or you have to estimate.

Some ways you can make heavy takeout orders work in your plan:

Option 1: Order as often as you want, but eat half the portion one day and half the portion the next day (or split it in 3 servings, if that fits your calories better). Put the other portion in a Tupperware RIGHT AWAY. Don’t let it sit on your plate if you don’t plan to eat it that meal.
Option 2: Put parameters around how often you can order the heavy takeout meal (once a month, once every three months, only on my birthday, those are some examples). Make it reasonable and do-able (not like, once a decade).
Option 3: Make it more calorie-reasonable. You can order a smaller portion, or leave out the rice, or get vegetable curry. See what you are willing to do and still be satisfied.
Option 4; Learn how to make it at home! Even if you use a full-fat recipe and use all the heavy ingredients, you will still be able to better control your portions and make a much more accurate estimate of calories for your food log.

Remember, for all these options, the main thing is that you commit to logging what you eat in your food diary (no matter what!) This will help keep you accountable and give you good data to make sure you are staying at your average daily calorie target.

Which option seems most do-able for the rest of your life?

gallicinvasion

Just so you know, I’ve lost 100 lbs and kept it off for a year so far. Over the past two years while doing that, I’ve eaten McDonalds, Thai food, curries, huge bowls of Mac n cheese, big burgers, milkshakes, brownies, cheesecake, cinnamon buns, you name it. I just log it all, make it fit in my calories by controlling the portions or making it myself, enjoy it, and move on. You can do it too!

The guilt is a hard thing to get over. Keep working at it! You can do it.

Go_Deskercise

Can I say *in the nicest way possible* that if this is your mentality, then you will continue to fail at losing weight.
Nobody is perfect all the time and do not need to be.
Go easy on yourself and stop "dieting".
Change your lifestyle gradually and do not eliminate certain foods you like just because you think they are bad.

Good luck with everything!!!

sijomial

It's just food not a mortal sin against the gods of dieting to enjoy a beef curry and rice!
Dieting is hard enough without thinking you have to be "excellent" every day.

It won't be the last time you eat food cooked by someone else and/or eat a high calorie meal.
Are you going to have such extreme feelings every time you go off plan? If you are then I would suggest your plan isn't a good one.

Just put it in perspective......
Did one meal mean you ate at weight maintenance calories for one day?
If yes you might get to goal weight one day later if it did. Big deal!!

Or did you just have a smaller than usual calorie deficit for one day?

Terytha

Every friday I for the last two months I've had takeout. It hasn't ruined a darn thing.

Let's do some math.

You have to eat 3500 calories above maintenance to gain 1 pound.

The average maintenance is 2000.

Let's assume that bowl put you at 3000 calories for the day.

If you ate at maintenance all week, you'd gain under half of a pound. But you didn't, you've been in a deficit for 5 weeks. Assuming your goal is to lose 1 pound a week, you were already down by 3500 for the previous 7 days.

So instead of losing a whole pound, you lost ~70% of a pound. Still a loss.

And that's assuming that that bowl gave you a 3000 calorie day, which is unlikely.

Which means nothing is ruined. Not even close. At worst, you'll retain water like crazy for a few days before you see the drop.

corinasue1143

35 days of losing on schedule, one day of losing, but not on schedule, or probably at the worst maintaining.
Sounds like a darn good average to me.

AnnPT77

Others have talked about weight loss math, and weight loss (really weight management) psychology. I'll suggest a fun story, because people like stories, amirite? It's my story, so I'm pretty sure it's true.

Might wanna read it, just for fun:

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10603949/big-overfeed-ruins-everything-nope

quemalosuerte

TBH I lost 30lbs last spring,summer, fall including 10lbs in the fall when I was tailgating college football games every other Saturday: beer, breakfast burritos, chips, liquor, burgers, brats, and a soda and pretzel at the game. Do I recommend it? No. Did I still lose weight? Yeah. Did it slow things down? For sure. But a single meal every now and again isn't going to ruin all of the work you do the rest of the time, unless you let it turn into weeks or months or backtracking.

PAV8888

Excellent link!

What I want to know why Chinese is the best choice for a Beef Curry?

Would not Indian, or possibly Malaysian curry, be more appropriate?

Maybe this curry thing should be a call for a major review and change to your approach to dieting.

Seriously: the level of intensity of approach and personal turmoil when things go slightly sideways is totally raising my hackles in terms of how healthy this diet intervention is when it comes to the totality of your well being.

Weight management is not time limited.

Your current level of intensity appears to lack flexibility.

Inflexible things that are stressed a long time end up breaking.

Avoiding breaking is good!!!

Skyle33

You’ll be fine. Yesterday I ate 6,680 calories by way of an entire large cheesy stuffed crust pepperoni and sausage pizza with 8 wings, and $20 worth of Taco Bell a few hours later. Yes I’ll be bloated and dehydrated for 2/3 days but I do this type of thing once every 1-2 months. For me it’s a basic cheat meal because I eat a lot anyway, but as you’ll often hear: “one bad meal won’t kill you, the same way one healthy meal won’t save you”. Just go on as if it never happened. It’s behind you now, and all you can do is go back to normal.

richardgavel

The issue is not whether you had one cheat meal (assuming this really counts as a cheat meal). The issue is whether you believe this will turn into 2 and 3 and more cheat meals in the coming days. You have to be willing to allow yourself to enjoy things or else it's not going to be sustainable.