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"No offense, but you're getting kinda big."

JenG20JenG20 Member Posts: 14 Member Member Posts: 14 Member
Recently got this comment from a family member. It definitely caught me off guard. Not sure if anyone has been in a similar situation. If so how did you handle this?
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  • harper16harper16 Member Posts: 2,025 Member Member Posts: 2,025 Member
    Punch them in the throat, and say no offense but you're a (fill in the blank with your favorite curse word.)

    Ok. I've gotten this and I choose to ignore it. Most of my weight gain was caused by my doing fertility treatments, and we felt like that was our business.
    edited June 9
  • Cardeeoh_NicoleCardeeoh_Nicole Member Posts: 19,373 Member Member Posts: 19,373 Member
    I'm sorry, that sucks. It happened to me and left a mark. My only advice is to remind you that anyone who would say that to you is an a$$hat and doesn't deserve the time you've given to think about this.

    If it's true and you want to change it then go ahead and do it... but in spite of them, not because of them. Do it for yourself.
  • JenG20JenG20 Member Posts: 14 Member Member Posts: 14 Member
    harper16 wrote: »
    Punch them in the throat, and say no offense but you're a (fill in the blank with your favorite curse word.)

    Ok. I've gotten this and I choose to ignore it. Most of my weight gain was caused by my doing fertility treatments, and we felt like that was our business.

    Hahaha! I only gave a one word response. But afterwards I couldn't stop thinking about it? It came from someone who is actually loosing weight so I would've thought they'd be a bit supportive on my journey? I'm now trying not to stress out about it and just do me. lol
  • r3d_butt3rfly_r3d_butt3rfly_ Member Posts: 2,474 Member Member Posts: 2,474 Member
    I have been in a similar situation. In that moment I lost respect for that person. If you have a forgiving heart just forgiving them for their ignorance and move on. If you're getting big or small it shouldn't matter to the next person. That's your choice and you live your life however the *kitten* you want.
  • ReenieHJReenieHJ Member Posts: 1,753 Member Member Posts: 1,753 Member
    Some people have absolutely no filter and no thoughts of others' feelings. :( My 87 yo neighbor is like that and on numerous occasions has remarked on my weight, whether it had gone up or down. I lit right into him. Believe me, he deserved it because he's said lots of inappropriate things to me so now, instead of worrying about being *nice* to him because of his age, I just tell him how it is. And to the disagrees coming, you'd have to know this person, then you'd understand.

    My dh can be clueless like that as well, which isn't nearly so easy to address. But his whole family(8 sibs, but it's mostly the 4 men)is like that also. They always have a comment about people's weight, or whatever they think might be funny to themselves at the moment. :( I've been on the receiving end of it, as well as 1 of my dds. :( We don't see my dd often :( but during 1 of her recent trips home, she said something about taking pictures and dh commented it must've been a wide angle lens. She just simply said 'that was rude', to which he said yes, it was.
    Some people make everybody's business their business and others think rude thoughtless remarks can be funny, neither of which is true. But so very unfortunately, once something gets said, it's hard to forget it. :(

    Please try not to let a stupid comment dictate who you are. You are more than what they think.
  • dekrugermollydekrugermolly Member Posts: 18 Member Member Posts: 18 Member
    That is way out of line! You need to stick up for yourself, my mom has comments almost everytime I go there and I always say “I didn’t come here to be called fat” and she drops it instantly. Some people think they have good intentions but we all own a mirror. We can see our body change and we don’t need or want reminders. You are doing great. It’s quarantine and I’m sure the majority of us are on the thicker side right now, I know I am. If you don’t stick up for yourself then who will? You got this.
  • ReenieHJReenieHJ Member Posts: 1,753 Member Member Posts: 1,753 Member
    JenG20 wrote: »
    harper16 wrote: »
    Punch them in the throat, and say no offense but you're a (fill in the blank with your favorite curse word.)

    Ok. I've gotten this and I choose to ignore it. Most of my weight gain was caused by my doing fertility treatments, and we felt like that was our business.

    Hahaha! I only gave a one word response. But afterwards I couldn't stop thinking about it? It came from someone who is actually loosing weight so I would've thought they'd be a bit supportive on my journey? I'm now trying not to stress out about it and just do me. lol

    My catty petty response would be to wait until she does a diet rebound and say the same thing to her. :/ But I can be petty and catty that way. Lol
    This is why I prefer dogs to people most of the time. Have no clue what they're thinking but they accept you and love you no matter what. :)
    edited June 10
  • ChieflrgChieflrg Member Posts: 8,437 Member Member Posts: 8,437 Member
    I would just change the subject or walk away. I don't really care about other people's opinions on how I look since my goal is for me specifically.

    Some people just want to impose their thoughts or beliefs on you as a reaction of a insecurity of their own.

    If brought up again I would smile and walk away excusing myself from their thoughts, they can seek other avenues of people to share their unwelcome thoughts.
  • Dakase83Dakase83 Member Posts: 2,458 Member Member Posts: 2,458 Member
    I would have replied with something like "well no offense, but you're a dick"
  • thelastnightingalethelastnightingale Member, Premium Posts: 318 Member Member, Premium Posts: 318 Member
    "No offence, but you're getting kinda mean."
  • allycs85allycs85 Member, Premium Posts: 40 Member Member, Premium Posts: 40 Member
    My response would highly depend on the context of the conversation. If they said it to be mean then responding in a catty way would only leave them feeling validated.
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