Bereavement

Options
2»

Replies

  • joolspen3942
    joolspen3942 Posts: 71 Member
    Options
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    My mom died last year to an accidental fall. Other than that she was healthy. All the holidays were hard. And her first anniversary was last month. But life will go on with or without us happy or not. I miss my mom. I miss her smile and hugs. So that's what I focus on, all the good stuff we had together. And I've FOCUSED more on showing love to the ones that matter to me NOW. Just a text or even a quick call hello to them has helped me to feel much better about not leaving things off the table.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

    That's terrible I'm so sorry to hear this.. thankyou so much for your reply it means alot.yes u are correct to remember best times and to show love to the ones still here .. 🙏
  • joolspen3942
    joolspen3942 Posts: 71 Member
    Options
    onward1 wrote: »
    I'm so sorry for your loss. My Mom passed five years ago and even though we knew it was coming, it still left me feeling numb. I had to find a new normal instead of visiting her. You'll have to take it one day at a time, and as @diatonic said, we all grieve differently. And that's okay, there's no "normal" way to feel. Just know that time really does heal all, be kind to yourself and cry, cry, cry if you have to. She'll always be with you in spirit. I'm sure you brought her much happiness in her life. Good luck to you my friend.

    ❤❤❤
  • joolspen3942
    joolspen3942 Posts: 71 Member
    Options
    jennifergare12 wrote: »
    To continue, yes it is normal to feel numb, empty, sad, brokenhearted, confused, angry, bitter, sluggish because death is not normal to us humans. We expect that our loved ones will be around forever but unfortunately that is not the case. Going to work might be a challenge if you have to be around people because taking a little time to grieve and just listen to your heart might be best but everyone is different in the way that they grieve. Whatever you are going through in your feelings they are yours and it is okay to feel any way that you might be feeling. Feel better okay. Again, I know how you feel!! Jennifer~

    I'm so so sorry babe to hear this it's just awful so terrible Godbless you Jennifer. If you ever want to talk I'm here to help think with our mums literally passing within a matter of days from each other we can support one another if need be. Godbless u❤❤❤❤
  • dew11252
    dew11252 Posts: 88 Member
    Options
    @joolspen3942
    My mom died Oct 2015, my best friend Mar 2016, my aunt Jan 2017, my uncle Apr 2017, my Dad Christmas night 2017. I was by their side when Mom and Dad took their last breath. We cared for them at home. Four other relatives/ family friends died in Sept 2017.

    So.....
    Yes, life goes on.
    But time doesn't 'heal' . With time, you learn to cope/deal.
    Cry when you want to..... it clears your tear ducts and is a good release.
    Visit their grave and chat with them. I used to go more often at first. I'd get an iced coffee, go the cemetery, and sit in the car playing dad's favorite CD. Brings laughter and tears. If thats not for you, find another way to have times of remembrance - maybe a cup of coffee on the patio and trip down memory lane. Talk to them (if no one can hear).

    Eventually, you remember more of the good times and memories bring a smile. The next day you may miss them so much you find tears rolling down your cheeks. I'm single. I went to my parents for advice and support. I still miss them and always will. They had a corner of my heart that is theirs forever.

    Grief is not a five step process and you're done. It's a healing process, meaning the pain moves from acute to chronic to intermittent to rarely. I can deal with rarely. Whatever emotion hits you today, let it out
    gotta release the emotion to get to 'rarely'

    Hugs...🤗
  • AliNouveau
    AliNouveau Posts: 36,287 Member
    Options
    I'm gonna guess it's hard losing anyone close to you. My dad died in 2016 after battling cancer for I guess a bit over a year. I spent lots of time with him while he was in the hospital because it was only 10 minutes from my house and I realized he wouldn't be around forever. While it eased the impact of his death in have to say i still felt like I was in a fog for a couple of months after his death. Somedays all you can do is just get through the day then it's like everything became clearer one day and I felt back to normal again. I wanted once again to do things that I hadn't wanted to do for awhile.

    I remember arguing with someone here in the forums once when someone said they were down because of a recent family death and they didn't want to go to the gym. I replied you have to heal and then move on the other argued it would give them energy as that's what working out does. I kept making my point that sometimes we have to look after what's inside first because that's what is taking up our energy. The gym will always be there but sometimes we need all the energy we can muster to just make it from one day to the next. Hope the fog lifts soon and you can feel better
  • joolspen3942
    joolspen3942 Posts: 71 Member
    Options
    AliNouveau wrote: »
    I'm gonna guess it's hard losing anyone close to you. My dad died in 2016 after battling cancer for I guess a bit over a year. I spent lots of time with him while he was in the hospital because it was only 10 minutes from my house and I realized he wouldn't be around forever. While it eased the impact of his death in have to say i still felt like I was in a fog for a couple of months after his death. Somedays all you can do is just get through the day then it's like everything became clearer one day and I felt back to normal again. I wanted once again to do things that I hadn't wanted to do for awhile.

    I remember arguing with someone here in the forums once when someone said they were down because of a recent family death and they didn't want to go to the gym. I replied you have to heal and then move on the other argued it would give them energy as that's what working out does. I kept making my point that sometimes we have to look after what's inside first because that's what is taking up our energy. The gym will always be there but sometimes we need all the energy we can muster to just make it from one day to the next. Hope the fog lifts soon and you can feel better

    ❤❤❤

Categories