What are you doing to outsmart rebound weight gain with friends

Diatonic12
Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
in Goal: Maintaining Weight
If conducting one special diet or food protocol worked, you would conduct it one time and one time only. There would be no such thing as rebound weight gain with friends. One diet would fix all of your problems for you until it doesn't. How are you avoiding rebound weight gain with friends after all of the dieting is done.

Replies

  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    That's it in a nutshell without the whole bushel, @ninerbuff. I do enjoy the way you think.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @ninerbuff

    I go back to this thread because of @lgfrie's post about alcohol and how it sabotages weight loss goals.

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10779803/alcoholic-quitting-alcohol-effortless-weight-loss#latest

    I don't really drink much but I like that post. Give yourselves permission to take what you need from a bunch of different sources and threads. I've always enjoyed your Moderator advice through the years. Another wise Moderator here reminded me that this is not a research paper.

    That really frees you from overthinking everything. Weight Loss and Maintenance shouldn't be this complicated but I think we could go on talking about it forever. I enjoy the just give me the bottomline approach.

  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    Rebound weight gain with friends. The original + several or many more pounds stacking back on like a freight train.

    It's happened to me and that's why I need to talk about Maintenance. The first time, I ate it all back. It was a major flop and failure. No ifs ands or buts about it. It took me 2.5 years to undo all of that rebound weight gain. The 2nd time was much harder than the 1st time. With every passing day and year the ground will grow colder.

    Don't wait until you're standing at the gate.

    So much of this stuff is mental. Blame it all on your brain or genetics or environment but in the end you have to take full responsibility for yourself. I can only speak for myself but connection matters. No one has all of the answers. That's why we have each other.

    We like to share our experiences because writing it down helps us see where we need to make some course corrections along the way. It's a tonic. I diet tonic and I need it.

    There's no one in my small corner of the world who cares about any of these things. You care and I care or we wouldn't be here. Some probably have much bigger fish to fry. They're writing scientific books and research papers, spending all of their time in the lab. Getting things published and making copies.

    For those here on the forum, giving and sharing is proof positive of just how much you have to offer. Our time here may be free but it's always valuable.

  • Strudders67
    Strudders67 Posts: 989 Member
    My 'diet' (for want of a better word) was simply to eat smaller portions. Although I've added a few more recipes to my repertoire, I still eat pretty much the same foods as I did three years ago. At home I usually have more veg and less rice or potatoes or pasta than I ate previously but, if I go to a family member or friend's house, I can also serve myself less rice or pasta or potatoes too. If I eat out, I tend to chose dishes with a side salad rather than anything carb-laden, but that's because of my diabetes diagnosis as much as anything else. Also, as I usually know in advance that I'm going out, I lower my intake for the rest of the week so that my average is still close to where I want my calorie intake to be.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @Strudders67 Very similar to what I'm doing. I moderate myself with all foods. No food group restriction protocols for me. Been there, done that. Fat, fat, fat was not where it was at for me. I ate it all back even with the high satiety factor of fats.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
    edited September 2020
    I have to say that weight gain due to friends is not a big problem for me right now, since thanks to Covid I haven’t eaten with anyone outside my family since March!

    When I changed my way of life it wasn’t a “diet,” and it didn’t have an end, therefore there was never any rebound. I ate the correct amount of food for my goals, and updated it as my goals changed. Right now my goal is to stay within 5 lbs of 150 lbs, and I have done that for three years. Part of the way I do it by logging every day, and only eating the food I need. That means when I go out with friends, I take the initiative in discussing where we go and what we do. Instead of eating out we often do other things - when I saw my high school friends who I hadn’t seen in years they all really wanted to go to the shooting range together, and then to a comics convention. It was much more fun than stuffing ourselves. I also stopped eating out with my mom, who likes to go to places with calorific American style food which isn’t very exciting to me. I don’t want to waste my calories on big meals I don’t even like. Instead my mom and I drove up to the small town where she used to stay with her cousins every summer, and down to the house where she grew up, among other things. Eating out less can lead to having a much better time with new and exciting memories, compared to just the same old drinks, meals, stuff faces routine you take for granted.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @rheddmobile Maintaining for 3 years. I like it, I love it, I want some more of it. You've saved money for trips, too. I'm happy for you.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    lgfrie wrote: »
    My wife and I quit alcohol when we started dieting in May. Mainly because our previous dozen or so attempts to diet were all sabotaged by wine, which we drank copiously with dinner and socially. The inhibition-killing liquid just made food control impossible and we realized it was an either/or proposition; alcohol and weight loss couldn't co-exist, at least not for us.

    I still have an occasional drink or two in social situations, like once a month or so, but never in the house, and my wife has not had a drop of alcohol in 7 or 8 months.

    It's probably the best thing we ever did. The health impact, especially the relative ease of dieting after trying in vain for years to resist the siren call of junk food while buzzed on red wine, has been tremendous. I'd give abstinence from alcohol my very highest recommendation for anyone trying to get the health aspect of their life back on track.

    It was hard for a week or two. Mainly, we'd finish dinner and be like "What are we supposed to do now?" But we adjusted pretty quickly and it's been pretty easy since. Sobriety has its own rewards; it's incredible how much you can get done in a day when you're free of mind-altering substances LOL


    I wanted to read this again. It's so honest. Whenever there's a gathering or barbecue there's drinks and a lorra lorra food. Even if you're not drinking, others are and they always want you to try all of their dishes. Some will get offended if you don't. Don't ask me why.

    I don't have to drink to get buzzed. I can get buzzed on food with added sugars. It's always been that way. I've been allergic to corn syrup since birth and riding on the gummy bear train takes me to crazytown. I can get drunk on corn syrup, you really wouldn't notice a difference. Alcohol, I'm flat on the floor. Genetics.

    Do everything on your own terms. Take what you need to maintain. Maintenance is where the rubber really meets the road. It's the offshoot of your original success story.

  • sardelsa
    sardelsa Posts: 9,812 Member
    I either gain weight on purpose at times with lots of family/friend functions (for me that's fall/winter) Or if I'm in weight loss or maintaining mode I calorie bank for those outings. I love wine I'm not giving that up (temporarily for some circumstances of course).
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    That's some knowledge and wisdom, @AnnPT77
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @sal10851 Oooo Sal. You've shared one of the smartest secrets on MFP. Many members have been doing this for years.
  • siyeonsimpp
    siyeonsimpp Posts: 211 Member
    I guess Corona is helping us out on this one...no one can even go out with their friends as much anymore, I guess that's one thing to look forward to this winter, since outdoor seating won't be available. No open restaurants = no rebound weight :)
  • sal10851
    sal10851 Posts: 171 Member
    @Diatonic12 I seriously wish I knew a lot more when I began my health journey. Luckily the weight came off on its own. I guess if you eat like you're supposed to your body will naturally react accordingly. Now that I'm reaching my goal I don't want to rely on exercise to maintain my weight. With this pandemic I've had plenty of time to be productive and what's more productive than adopting a healthy lifestyle!
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @jungkooksdonut17

    We do miss our friends. You sure have a cute lil buddy. That face.


  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @sal10851 I had to stop looking for happiness in the same place I lost it. Flying by the seat of my pants no longer works for me. Maintenance is the reward. You'll learn to love it more than anything money can buy.
  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,809 Member
    Probably my eating philosophy is closest to Alan Aragon's idea of 80% good food I actively enjoy, 10% food I don't enjoy that much but is good for me or simply fulfils a need, 10% pure fun foods eaten solely for pleasure.
    (The fun foods percentage probably goes up in the summer months when I have a very large calorie allowance!)

    As for weight maintenance, I don't find it hard and I actively take steps to make it easy and enjoyable.
    I know I dislike rules and restrictions so minimise them. That's where people need to personalise their maintenance plan. That my method is good for me doesn't make it in any way universal, some thrive on routine, repetition and a set of rules which would make maintenance miserable and hard work for me.

    It's also just a part of my overall goals of a healthy and happy lifestyle.

    The one hard rule is that I intervene when my weight hits my upper limit. I've bounced off that limit several times in 7+ years of maintenance but never for long and never had to go back to full on dieting because I limit the slide.
    It takes me seconds a day to remain vigilant and keep an eye on my weight trend. It takes seconds to be mindful of what and how much I eat.


  • SummerSkier
    SummerSkier Posts: 5,132 Member
    Diatonic12 wrote: »
    If conducting one special diet or food protocol worked, you would conduct it one time and one time only. There would be no such thing as rebound weight gain with friends. One diet would fix all of your problems for you until it doesn't. How are you avoiding rebound weight gain with friends after all of the dieting is done.

    as a serial rebounder all my life I have to say that different things worked different times and then they didn't. I could go years at a good weight and then spike up again. I have always exercised to some extent so I have to acknowledge that is was what and how much I was eating which caused the gain.

    One thing which I have noticed tho for me (yo yo er) is that my weight is always a sine curve. And sometimes what happens is that I start a sort of rollercoaster effect of eating a little too much, then eating too little and then too much and the sine waves get larger and larger over say weeks or months. And none of it is extreme like binging and restricting just a little too much and then a little not enough. Eventually the whole screw it approach happens and I close my eyes for a few months and BOOM there I am back up 20 or so pounds. again.

    SO, to me the important thing is to STAY OFF THAT rollercoaster. Yeah - I can ack that I will never be perfect and there will be a few days here and there where I stray. But to me more important is to not get back on the crazy ride afterwards but just stay normal.

    This is completely different from other folks who CAN calorie bank for special events etc. So knowing yourself is also important and trying to understand why things have happened in the past. for you. (See post above mine about PONW/NONW which is so true!)

    I also look at longer term goals (tried to actually start one in this forum for monthly activities) of months vs weeks for improvement in different areas other than just weight. I don't want to have my entire life always focused on my weight.

    Good Luck to you Diatonic12.

  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    edited September 2020
    Doing things you don't want to do all in the name of weight loss is the recipe for eating it all back.

    This is my 2nd time reaching maintenance and I'm still standing at 1.7 years. The first time, I ate it all back. First time, I was thinking about entertaining myself with playfoods or food rewards when I arrived at the end of the dieting process. This time, I'm not.

    Maintenance is the reward.

    It's been a total of 6 years to reach this point. The All or Nothing approach to food lends itself to thinking about food rewards when you get to the end of the process. There is no such thing as the Finish Line when it comes to maintenance.

    There is a big life beyond all of this but having been through this two times, I won't be able to intuitively eat and leave it all to chance.

    Rewarding ourselves with immediate gratification is learned behavior. I was always thinking how I was going to reward myself with something. Rewards are no longer my reason for living. I really don't care about them.

    I had to learn not to let my feelings drive, drive, drive my behavior with food. Separate feelings from my identity. Find meaning for being uncomfortable with obesity and how it takes away from your quality of health.

    The value of our health is determined by how much we value it.



  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    I admire the attitude of the athletes here.

    They don't share the need to identify with a specific height or weight or age. Calling all vertically challenged men or sweet petites. Nope. There's none of that and I like it. If you want to break free of obesity then quit identifying with a specific weight class along with a corresponding height. It messes with your head.

    Groups are good. Connection matters.

    Connect with those who can show you the pathway to overall health and well being. You'll find them here. Self-starters and self-sustaining for the most part. What people need is direction and a road map to get there.



  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    @ninerbuff

    " And I'd nix the alcohol because it inhibits stored calorie burning."

    Over the years, there have been some MFP discussions for sharing how easy it is for crossaddiction or coaddiction to take the place of food. I know those who've opted for WLS and ended up drinking their way back to their original weights and more. Rebound weight gain with friends. They traded in food addiction for alcohol. It's subtle but I've watched it happen with my own eyes. The alcohol messed with everything and it does inhibit stored calorie burning.

    https://blog.myfitnesspal.com/is-alcohol-sabotaging-your-weight-loss/

    No one wants to hear about beer and T2 but my endo tells me about it. Alcohol gives you twice as many calories as protein and carbs. Alcohol lacks nutrients and speeds up fat storage. It only has 2 fewer calories than fat per gram. Keep telling it like it really is.

    I will always prefer can't fool myself realism over massive rationalization and excuses.

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