confessional thread

ermengarde22
ermengarde22 Posts: 2,116 Member
edited November 2020 in Chit-Chat
confess your sins

say it plain or innuendo is fine, no judgement allowed ♥️
«134

Replies

  • GymGoddessGoals
    GymGoddessGoals Posts: 2,146 Member
    iMago wrote: »
    im the one hoarding all the TP and cough medicine sorry guys

    ltwzprl14d0m.gif
  • Yoshiboobs
    Yoshiboobs Posts: 1,090 Member
    I confess that if the gf doesn't stop it with the murder stuff I'm gonna break the television.
  • steph6556
    steph6556 Posts: 575 Member
    Sophisticatted_Gentlemanz wrote: »
    A long time ago, I was a traveling salesman. Door-to-door, you know the type, the kinda guy who would try to worm his way into your living room because once I got you to let me in we both knew I'd be there long enough that you'd feel bad for *me* and offer me something to drink, maybe even something to eat.

    I'm not going to tell you what I sold, because it's not important for this story.

    So anyway, I approach this house--looked like a standard middle-income, red-brick kinda place in a suburb of a large town. Again, not gonna say which town because it's not important for this story.

    I tried to ring the doorbell, but I didn't hear anything, and that's odd--you know how the doorbell is supposed to be for the people in the house, but you can always hear it from outside? I rang it a few times, but nobody answered, so I knocked, hard and long. It was hot, I was thirsty. You know how that is, right?

    So this lady answers the door and I *know* I've seen her somewhere before. I tuck that aside and dive into my spiel, maybe even a little pushier than normal because it IS hot and I can feel the air conditioning pouring through the cracked-front-door and I know it's gonna be so much cooler in there.

    She looks hesitant, but I pour on the charm, and she finally invites me in to demo this product that I can't say the name of (don't worry, it's not important for this story).

    I get inside and realize that this is some sort of meeting. There are people sitting around her living room, sitting on the couches and loveseat, someone had pulled the bench out from the piano, and it looked like a few people were on kitchen chairs.

    Turns out, they're having a prayer meeting.

    "Tell us your sins," this dude asks, seated just to my left. I felt like there was a spotlight on me. I can't remember the last time I've felt so vulnerable.

    "Well," I stammered, wracking my brain. You know how it is--when you're suddenly on the spot, you can't think of answers to even the simplest questions. "I guess my biggest confessions would be that I talk too much, and I lie a lot."

    I confess that I was realllyyy hoping for another ending to this story!! You’re a great story teller and I was hooked but I think I’ve seen too many salesman movies and once they let you in the door they’re either going to peel your skin off or something else more pleasant 😉

  • cowsfan12
    cowsfan12 Posts: 6,135 Member
    Miss_Chiev0us wrote: »
    I shared the nudes with my friends.
    and here I thought we were friends .. sheesh 😂😂😂
  • Sophisticatted_Gentlemanz
    Sophisticatted_Gentlemanz Posts: 513 Member
    steph6556 wrote: »
    Sophisticatted_Gentlemanz wrote: »
    A long time ago, I was a traveling salesman. Door-to-door, you know the type, the kinda guy who would try to worm his way into your living room because once I got you to let me in we both knew I'd be there long enough that you'd feel bad for *me* and offer me something to drink, maybe even something to eat.

    I'm not going to tell you what I sold, because it's not important for this story.

    So anyway, I approach this house--looked like a standard middle-income, red-brick kinda place in a suburb of a large town. Again, not gonna say which town because it's not important for this story.

    I tried to ring the doorbell, but I didn't hear anything, and that's odd--you know how the doorbell is supposed to be for the people in the house, but you can always hear it from outside? I rang it a few times, but nobody answered, so I knocked, hard and long. It was hot, I was thirsty. You know how that is, right?

    So this lady answers the door and I *know* I've seen her somewhere before. I tuck that aside and dive into my spiel, maybe even a little pushier than normal because it IS hot and I can feel the air conditioning pouring through the cracked-front-door and I know it's gonna be so much cooler in there.

    She looks hesitant, but I pour on the charm, and she finally invites me in to demo this product that I can't say the name of (don't worry, it's not important for this story).

    I get inside and realize that this is some sort of meeting. There are people sitting around her living room, sitting on the couches and loveseat, someone had pulled the bench out from the piano, and it looked like a few people were on kitchen chairs.

    Turns out, they're having a prayer meeting.

    "Tell us your sins," this dude asks, seated just to my left. I felt like there was a spotlight on me. I can't remember the last time I've felt so vulnerable.

    "Well," I stammered, wracking my brain. You know how it is--when you're suddenly on the spot, you can't think of answers to even the simplest questions. "I guess my biggest confessions would be that I talk too much, and I lie a lot."

    I confess that I was realllyyy hoping for another ending to this story!! You’re a great story teller and I was hooked but I think I’ve seen too many salesman movies and once they let you in the door they’re either going to peel your skin off or something else more pleasant 😉

    Forum rules and all that :)
  • cowsfan12
    cowsfan12 Posts: 6,135 Member
    Kashmir_314_ wrote: »
    This one time at band ca...nvm

    What instrument did you play 🤔🤔 asking for a friend
  • Miss_Chiev0us
    Miss_Chiev0us Posts: 1,592 Member
    cowsfan12 wrote: »
    Miss_Chiev0us wrote: »
    I shared the nudes with my friends.
    and here I thought we were friends .. sheesh 😂😂😂

    wrz28p5ef39y.gif
  • cowsfan12
    cowsfan12 Posts: 6,135 Member
    once me and a friend were getting a pop from a vending machine - we got the pop and our money back so we tried again ... and well - we emptied that vending machine that night - even the diet and neither of us drank diet -
  • Yoshiboobs
    Yoshiboobs Posts: 1,090 Member
    Sometimes I ate the food that mom said not to eat and just let my brother take the fall.
  • MaltedTea
    MaltedTea Posts: 6,286 Member
    sweet_ermengarde wrote: »
    i wrote fake letters to advice columnists in magazines and papers and on advice forums for a long time and got published in best-of-the-year lists for a bunch of em

    also there is a good size group of people that does that, everywhere and its kinda competitive

    Every now and again and more often than not, you remind me how much I love you. This is nothing less than amazing 😭
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    sweet_ermengarde wrote: »
    i wrote fake letters to advice columnists in magazines and papers and on advice forums for a long time and got published in best-of-the-year lists for a bunch of em

    also there is a good size group of people that does that, everywhere and its kinda competitive

    tumblr_judgingyou.gif
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    cowsfan12 wrote: »
    once me and a friend were getting a pop from a vending machine - we got the pop and our money back so we tried again ... and well - we emptied that vending machine that night - even the diet and neither of us drank diet -

    I stopped reading when you said pop.

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