Negative Husband

Options
24

Replies

  • Mslmesq
    Mslmesq Posts: 1,001 Member
    Options
    Meh, 30's are the new 20's. Hell, Jennifer Anniston looks better in her 40's than she did in her 20's.

    Ignore him and carry on. :smile:
  • cmurphy252
    cmurphy252 Posts: 279 Member
    Options
    Ive lost 50lbs since having a baby in April and my husband has yet to tell me I'm looking better but he will comment on girls FB pics and tell them they are hot =/. I think i'm losing the battle =(

    WOW! Thats sad . . . . and disrespectful :frown: .
  • paine016
    paine016 Posts: 77 Member
    Options
    Ive lost 50lbs since having a baby in April and my husband has yet to tell me I'm looking better but he will comment on girls FB pics and tell them they are hot =/. I think i'm losing the battle =(

    He sounds like a ****.
  • crazybookworm
    crazybookworm Posts: 779 Member
    Options
    Could it possible be an insecurity issue? If he thinks you lose weight, that you won't want to be with him anymore? Sounds crazy, I know, but it does happen.

    Perhaps it is a jealousy issue as well. Thankfully, I have a beyond supportive partner, but during my weight loss journey, he was not the main focus of my attention anymore. I, myself was my main focus. He was perfectly supportive and happy about that, but perhaps your husband doesn't want to share you with...well, you. Just a thought!

    My advice, is just do it. Leave out the comments, and just work on getting healthier. :smile:
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    Options
    Maybe he's just cheating on you. Or jealous. Or trying to sabotauge you.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Options
    I don't think he's saying it to be negative... maybe he's worried you're trying to achieve something that's not possible and doesn't want you to feel bad if you don't get there.... maybe you need to reassure him that your goals are appropriate and healthy and that you're not torturing yourself or aiming for anything unreasonable, and that you can achieve them.

    I also think that most behaviour that people percieve as negative isn't intended that way. Maybe some people have a funny way of showing it, but in most cases people mean well and have others' best interests at heart... they just don't always know what really is in the best interests of the other person.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Options
    When I tell my husband how much more weight I want to lose or my fitness goals he always feels the need to remind me I am not in my 20's anymore. Anyone else deal with a negative nancy?

    Is he maybe just trying to keep you realistic with your goals and reassure you that you're fine no matter of you meet those goals of not?
  • thequiltmama
    Options
    I hope yours is only trying to be nice like mine. Mine says that so I don't feel bad about my size. But I also think they worry sometimes that if we look better we won't want them. Not the case but no one really understands what goes through their minds. Men are confusing sometimes. Best of luck and I think you should just remind yourself it is because he loves you. :)
  • katbirdinpa
    Options
    change is hard for some people and they don't like it much. He may be feeling insecure about your loveliness :flowerforyou:
  • kelliward1
    kelliward1 Posts: 99 Member
    Options
    Maybe he is just worried that once you lose the weight you will be getting a bunch of attention from other guys and such...just a thought.
  • MyaPapaya75
    MyaPapaya75 Posts: 3,143 Member
    Options
    I don't think hes being negative I think hes just trying to get you to be realistic..perhaps make a smaller goal at first and use that when talking to him like for me I say I will get to 150 and see what I will look like then decide if I want to go further...he just is being kind and doesn't want u to over do it I think....and I don't think hes insecure either I hate when people jump to that ..hes your husband for a reason not your BF...he wants you to have goals that are a success and ones you can be proud of...
  • missymakayla
    missymakayla Posts: 309 Member
    Options
    PROVE IT , DO IT !!!!!!!
  • dwg1010
    dwg1010 Posts: 4 Member
    Options
    Men can be such babies he does that to get a rise out of you. I'll tell you how to stop that, the next time he says looks hot say "let me see oh yeah she is hot" then walk away and go workout or walk out and go to the gym lol.
  • mjf0461
    mjf0461 Posts: 470 Member
    Options
    My situation is not a negative husband, its a man who he doesnt want me to gain alot of my weight back. But hal's the main cook in the house and I tell him I can't have that or this and he gets pissed. He doesn't understand that I know what works for me and I've tried to explain it and its like talking to a brick wall.

    I was doing great had lost over 88 lbs and then met him, and I've gained 35 lbs back. Everytime I try to get back on my program I get attitude.
  • Buckeyegirlbritt
    Options
    My husband looks at me and tells me, "I love you Honey, but I don't care. I think you look fine the way you are." So, indirectly he's being negative and positive in the same sentence to cover his *kitten*.
  • socajam
    socajam Posts: 2,530 Member
    Options
    You don't need him to tell you you can or can't - just do it, then rub your slim and toned tushie in his face like you're Miley Cyrus at the VMAs.


    Love your comment.
  • sharonfoustmills
    sharonfoustmills Posts: 519 Member
    Options
    mine quickly converted over to weight loss mode and quit the resistance once he realized I would feel better, our house would be cleaner, I would cook more, and the sex would get better--- show him how he benefits from your weight loss
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,692 Member
    Options
    When I tell my husband how much more weight I want to lose or my fitness goals he always feels the need to remind me I am not in my 20's anymore. Anyone else deal with a negative nancy?
    What I've observed is a husband/wife negative response is usually an echo of similar responses from husband/wife. One says something negative to one, and the other finds something negative to say back. Just an observation.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • KelGen02
    KelGen02 Posts: 668 Member
    Options
    You don't need him to tell you you can or can't - just do it, then rub your slim and toned tushie in his face like you're Miley Cyrus at the VMAs.

    LMAO- I needed this today! Thanks!
  • aliencheesecake
    aliencheesecake Posts: 570 Member
    Options
    I have a negative nancy in my home, he acts like me working out three days a week is obsessive, says I'm working out all the time..........3 days a week for an hour..........come on. I have to laugh and say no it's recommended, and obsessive is a word lazy people use for dedicated. I also tell him if he wants a 300lb wife he should keep pushing me about it and I'll just let myself go.

    Some people feel like any time not devoted to them is time wasted. :/