Eat like a thin person and what else?

GoRun2

We all know weight loss is more than eat less. There is a psychological component to it.

I'm trying to eat like a thin person when at happy hours, pot lucks and buffets. Those are some of my challenges. I'm going to look around at the thin ladies to see what they eat and do that.

What do you do to help you keep your head in the game?

elaroch05

1) Move more...I set a timer for 20 minutes and try to move at least a little bit every 20 minutes.

2) Swap other beverages for water and tea

3) Don't go extreme. Allow myself moments or times where I CAN enjoy a happy hour, pot luck, or buffet, just in moderation (i.e. not every day or every week)....also, that I can budget it in. If I plan moments like this, I can "save" calories for that time and enjoy myself.

4) Little habits at a time and focus on behavior adding vs behavior decreasing (i.e. aim for x amount of veggies today or x amount of walking minutes)

Hiawassee88

When we stop wrestling with ourselves, we start coasting. Start coasting and we fall back into old patterns. Doing what we've always done gets us what we've always gotten... mostly nothin'.

It's human nature not to do what we believe in but do what's convenient. We are creatures of habit and true to our nature. We take our jobs seriously. We choose to show UP every day for a career. Choosing to show UP every day for ourselves requires wrestling, self-talk and taking inspiration wherever we can find it.

Take what you need from a bunch of different sources. Don't let anyone define you. Birdie Bites at the Buffet. Moderate the portions that work for you and don't compare yourself to the thin ladies as they belly UP to the buffet table. Talk to yourself as you go through the line. Let them wonder what your secrets are.

cwolfman13

For myself, these kinds of things are very much occasions rather than regular occurrences...actually I don't think I've been to a buffet in probably 15 or 20 years. We get together with friends for a cookout and swim party about once per month so I just enjoy that for what it is. I'm also pretty active so I don't really have to worry about eating like a birdie.

justanotherloser007

Math, diligence and time for reflection. Every NSV is a very real victory that is important to celebrate in your mind. A NSV victory sets you up for some positive mind chatter. Utilize it! For buffets, I personally stopped going to them as well. But, I know on the volume eaters thread, they like buffets for: naked veggies and fruits. They eat a ton of veggies and fruits they didn't have to slice up themselves. So it might be a more, eat this not that, situation. I like the volume eaters thread for when I felt really hungry on this journey, I would eat lots of veggies! Think of all the wonderful things you can say to yourself when you eat all the healthy things for your body, mind, and feeling better! I mean, it is the opposite of the black hole when you binge on low nutrition foods that are high in calories. Your thoughts keep going up! Notice it, encourage it, keep it going!

Diligence. This virtue is like a shark. The second you stop working against your inherent laziness, you sink. So I do talk to myself about it. I have some health issues. When I started this journey I didn't pick up walking until I had reached Onederland. I had previously planned to lift weights when I got to 160 from 277 (5'3" Female). Basically the plan was I no longer had to do my fitness walking, instead I would lift. When I got to 160, I sighed with relief (I walk 1-2 hours every day), started my three times a week of lifting to build muscle.. and my body and mind became very unhappy. I started really stressing out, got hives again. The mental chatter wasn't very happy for me, so I had to stop and reflect to what was going wrong. I realized that my plan may not be a good one. Which surprised me, until I really thought about it. I reflect now when things go wrong instead of eating while emotional.

The walking has a ton of "other" components that previously I did not comprehend. I did it to: burn calories to eat more food, cico math, because I. want. to. eat. more. But in reality, I saw my neighbors every day, walked the dog, contended with weather, watched so many sunrises, saw flowers bloom, had favorite trees I would smell, watch butterflies, bees and birds, wave to kids on their way to school, pray the rosary. When the shutdowns really got bad, and everyone was going crazy, I would just remind myself that the whole world may be going insane, but MY foot just needs to hit the trail and repeat, so weird it totally worked - I had NO hives during any of the shutdowns!! The only time I haven't really had any hives since 2003!! I mean, it became a whole thing. The dog now sits in what used to be my spot on the couch (with a 277 butt pattern), as evidently I prefer to get my steps in. I tend to have a TON of positive mental talks to myself when I move, lots and lots of positive reinforcement. I just didn't realize it.

So I can't be lazy and just work out 3 times a week with weights so that I can have muscle and therefore eat more food. I actually was pretty angry and disappointed about this! At first. Because I had taken the whole walking thing FOR GRANTED. Completely.

Now I am looking at: walking AND lifting weights. I know that once I have a pretty solid lifting program it won't seem like a burden at all. Who knows, I might even like it. Like what happened with the walking.

But I think, that nothing is easy about changing who you are every day. Especially, if you have to deal with emotions about it (and you will because most people don't like change). I know I have to "carry my cross", but I have to be open to the mental, emotional and sometimes physical pain.

I NEVER for one minute, thought that I would become one of those "fitness people", or an "athlete". I never knew how far I could walk (I know I can walk 12 miles, and probably more). I mean, I'm 48! I ain't 30 or 20! It is very strange how different I am now to how I used to be. I am very different to who I thought I would be as well. I evidently had some back of the mind program habit of "eat, sit on couch" repeat in my future!! I don't even know when that happened!! But to stop the eat, sit, grow old like that, I had to change my habits. Sorry this is long, but when you talk psychological stuff, I mean.. that is what you will get!

Philliesfan21

Move more - eat better! Not necessarily eat less. Get in your meat and some low carb veggies. For pot lucks, etc, you can bring your own food if you are worried about ingredients in foods. For buffets, etc. go towards meats of any kind. They are full of nutrients and will give you satiety, so you won't indulge in the less than healthy options.

Angiestewart1982

Eating what the thin ladies are eating probably isn't the best strategy, you can't tell your metabolism to do what the thin ladies one does, nor do you know what those people are doing before/after the buffet, maybe they spent 2 hours in the gym earning that big lunch... how would you know?
So you need to eat for the thin person inside of you, not mimic what someone else is doing that might work for them.
Also agree with the earlier comments, go big on the salads (avoid anything with a creamy dressing tho!), vegetables and the lean protein meats, can't go far wrong with that combo!

justanotherloser007

Angiestewart1982 wrote: »

maybe they spent 2 hours in the gym earning that big lunch...

When I have holidays, and special days, I most certainly earn my lunch by longer workouts. I also tend to have protein shakes for breakfast/lunch so that if it is a 1,000 calorie meal I got no problems. So definitely, just because a lady is "thin" and eating "said food" really doesn't mean much at all.

So, I will quote something I thought was helpful "@cheesy567 quote “Goals must be focused on the habits. You can control your habits, you can control what you *do.* You cannot control the outcome. You can chose to follow your meal plan and exercise plan to a T. You cannot control what the scale says. You cannot control your weight. Weight is a byproduct of the balance of your lifestyle, the balance of all your eating and fitness habits. Focus on your habits, one by one."

"Thin"-ness is a byproduct of the balance of your lifestyle, all your eating and fitness habits.

AnnPT77

GoRun2 wrote: »

We all know weight loss is more than eat less. There is a psychological component to it.

I'm trying to eat like a thin person when at happy hours, pot lucks and buffets. Those are some of my challenges. I'm going to look around at the thin ladies to see what they eat and do that.

What do you do to help you keep your head in the game?

In general:

Realistically, I'm not going to have my head in the game for the whole rest of my natural life, which I hope will be measured in decades, even though I'm already old (66). Life gets complicated, busy, stressful, distracting sometimes. Plus eating/activity/bodyweight isn't the only important game (there's family, finances, most have career, home chores/improvements, more).

To me, that puts a premium of using my limited attention span and will power, when I have the bandwidth/energy, to experiment, find new/better habits that are relatively pleasant (at least tolerable), then practice them until they're pretty automatic. After that, autopilot can mostly take over when other parts of life get demanding.

Happy hours, buffets and potlucks specifically? Yeah, those are severe temptations for an ingrained hedonist (with FOMO) like me.

Happy hours, I usually have to drive, and that limits my drinking to a couple of drinks. If I'm going to eat, I usually plan to make that one of my meals for the day, and do what I usually do with restaurant meals: Look at the menu in advance, decide what I'm going to eat (nutritious, tasty, filling), order that, eat it, stop. (Sure, if someone asks if I want to try a bite of their whatever, I might do that - but probably just one.)

I generally don't go to all-you-can-eat buffet restaurants any more, unless someone holds an important-to-me event (like a close friend's birthday party) at one. That happens in my social life so rarely - probably once a year or less? - that I literally don't worry about it. Eat lightly earlier in the day, maybe eat slightly less the next day if still full, sometimes the extra food amps up the next day's workout energy . . . it works out.

Potlucks are more frequent, though not super much so, maybe up to once a month-ish, tops, for me?. While I was losing weight, I experimented with various approaches. None of them worked. Sure, I'll still do the "eat lightly before, maybe after if not hungry, etc." stuff. Maybe also try to recruit some of the potluck people to go for a walk or something, if the circumstances are good for that. I do usually try to make and take something myself that others will enjoy, but that I personally find filling, nutritious, and/or relatively low calorie.

These days (year 6, nearly 7, of maintenance), I mostly just go to the potluck, eat all the things I want to eat, occasionally until I'm stupid-full. I've learned that even on a really big full day (not just one meal), I tend to max out at somewhere around 2-3 times my TDEE. In theory, that could add up to a pound of gain, but experience suggests it usually doesn't, as long as I don't do it often. (Oversimplifying: Bodies like homeostasis.) If it does result in an observable gain, or if my weight starts to creep up a little across multiple events, I have to creep it back down again. I know how to do that, so it's NBD, really.

A saving grace is that at some potlucks, a lot of people these days bring grocery store or takeout foods that aren't very tempting to me. Those are easy to moderate. Other potlucks, with lots of yummy homemade goodies? I'm eating them, maybe more than one serving as long as there's plenty for all. And not beating myself up about it, either, or trying to make up for it. I'm not saying that's what other people should do, but it's working OK for me, at the frequency these things actually happen in my life. The majority of our days determines the majority of our outcomes, y'know?

So, take this as - perhaps - a sort of warning. If you met me now - judging from my interactions with many people who meet me now and are stunned to learn I was ever obese - you'd think I was a thin lady. (I'm 5'5", 120s pounds mostly.)

If you watched me at a potluck, thought I was a thin lady, did what I do, you'd eat all the things. Maybe you wouldn't want to do that - sounds like not. Me, I'm OK with it so far. 🤷‍♀️

CrustyOldMan

I try to eat like a peasant. Simple meager meals consisting of non processed whole foods. You know, a potato, some rice, simple salads without dressings. You would be suprised at how much food you can eat and still come under your calorie count for the day, and feel completly satisfied.

SilverSage1

GoRun2 wrote: »

I'm trying to eat like a thin person when at happy hours, pot lucks and buffets. Those are some of my challenges. I'm going to look around at the thin ladies to see what they eat and do that.

Thin isn’t necessarily healthier. Thinner is just thinner.

I have a good friend who is thinner than I am. She eats like a proverbial horse. And her diet is stereotypical southern - high in animal fats and salt. But her metabolism runs high and she is very thin. She also has myriad health problems, some, but not all, diet and exercise related. She has no strength, because she does nothing to build strength. She can’t get herself up early because she is up too late at night drinking too much. She takes a laundry list of medications for cholesterol, blood pressure, etc. But she is THIN.

If I followed her lead, I wouldn’t be able to do the things I do. I take no meds, other than vitamins. I weigh more than Diane, but I’m a heck of a lot healthier than she is. I have more stamina. I look 10 years younger, because I’m fit. She calls me to help her with things she can’t do for herself.

I don’t want to follow her example. Do I want to lose 10 more pounds? Yes. But I want to be healthy. Thin does not = healthy. They are not mutually exclusive, but they are not the same thing.

amfmmama

I recently turned 50, and had a change in my mindset. My goal is no longer to look good in a bathing suit, or to look like the thin ladies. Thin does not necessarily mean healthy. My focus now is to grow into a badass old lady! LOL. I go to the gym and I see this women that are killin it. It's inspiring me. Some have 20 years on me, and they are moving and looking incredible and HEALTHY!

GoRun2

Let me explain a litttle more what eat like thin women meens to me, When I was working, we often had lunch brought in or conferences with food brought in. Sometimes it was a buffet and sometimes they served you a plate. The food was OK but nothing special. I started to notice that the thin ladies ate less than everyone else, more like I should be eating. It helped me lose weight while I was working. I'm retired but have a club breakfast once a week. It's served on a plate. I'm leaving some of the food on the plate or asking for something healthier.

We have happy hour with the camping group. I almost always bring veggies and hummus. Others bring cheese, crackers, cashews and so on. I should stick with the veggies and hummus, which I like. Camping trip starts tomorrow.

We are going on our annual scuba diving trip on a boat. They serve a lot of food, lunch is buffet and dinner is served on a plate. Lots of snacks during the day. One woman's tactic is to only have one plate ful at the buffet, salad on half her plate and space between everything else on her plate. First dive trip in three years and starts in 3 weeks.

I gained a lot of weight during covid. I was doing ok with maintenance before covid. I have lost 11 pounds since March and have another 8 to get to pre covid. Then I'm working on the pesky pre covid 10.

I walked 4 to 8 miles a day during covid. I'm going back to the gym and slowly working on upper body and core. Can't believe my upper body and core got a 2 year rest and bang what happaned.

Thank you all for your thoughts.

_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_

As a fairly lean person, the one time I don't eat "diet" portions is at a potluck or other event. I'm not one to eat out normally, as I prefer to cook, and I have prepped meals and brought my own food to work for years. So if it's a social gathering I'm going to enjoy the food and not worry about it. I role model healthy food choices and portions sizes 95% of the time, but not if it's a special event or gathering. (I also don't typically eat at buffets, because I don't eat enough to make it worth the cost.)

cwolfman13

I focus on good nutrition and what amounts to a reasonable serving of food relative to my needs. I also focus on regular, daily exercise of some kind or another...whether that's recreational physical activity or actively training for something. I am generally not tempted to over-indulge as I don't like the feeling of being overly full. I eat three meals per day and do very little in the way of snacking save for my late afternoon/early evening planned snack. I may very well over-indulge a bit at parties and get togethers, but these types of things are occasional and have very little to no material affect on the whole of what I do. I have a very good understanding of what my calorie needs are relative to my activity for weight management and performance.

Mostly I strive to carryout an overall healthy lifestyle where the sum of my good living is greater than the sum of my indulgences and the rest just tends to take care of itself. I don't really do what the thin people do as I have no desire to be skinny...I do what the fit and healthy people do and that keeps me relatively lean and strong.

Sinisterbarbie1

@GOrun2 from your explanation it sounds like you already have a healthy game plan in place. Limiting yourself to one plate, choosing nutritious foods, filling most of the plate with salad (to that I would add be careful what you top that salad with - meat, croutons, nuts, cheese, and dressings all add calories quickly, but all foods are fine as long as you keep accurate track of calories in & out) and leaving space on your plate between the smaller tastes of other foods. If you are walking 4-8 miles daily, adding strength workouts at the gym to that, and also scuba diving you are definitely doing way more than I am, and I have successfully lost 51 pounds in the last year or so. I came back from some significant health set backs to be able to get active again, and am 5’9” and 138.6 as of this morning. (Working on maintaining and gaining back more strength). As long as you don’t try to rush the weight loss and instead focus on enjoying all the great activities you are involved in, it sounds like you are on a path to do very well. The only other thing I don’t do anymore is drink alcohol. I stopped because of various medicines I was on, and it is amazing the amount of calories you can use more productively even if you aren’t a big drinker. I found that there are now a lot of interesting alternatives for the sober curious and I really enjoy those when socializing, and they are half the calories or less of an alcoholic beverage.

Sand_TIger

Something that helped me a lot especially at the start, and this went along with learning portion control, was to make substitutions.

For example, soda. Maybe I pick a stevia or splenda sweetened soda instead of a regular one. If I don't make any other changes that day that's still a nice chunk of calories saved. Or maybe I got with low sugar ketchup instead of regular. Or instead of using the normal salad dressing I use a lite version or switch it up entirely and use balsamic vinegar. Or fat free Greek yogurt with berries and some low cal sweetener instead of the regular stuff with all the sugar. A favorite of mine is using a good non stick pan with a touch of cooking spray instead of a lot of oil. Taste is almost the same yet I can easily save a couple hundred calories.

You probably get the idea - there are a lot of small swaps and tweaks you can make that can add up to a lot, meanwhile you are still eating your favorite things. When you're ready, adding in smaller portions or switching in more fruits and vegetables can improve things a lot. You can also do the same thing with exercise and find in ways to fit in "movement snacks" throughout your day.

I'm emphasizing the easy simple stuff here because a person can make some pretty impressive progress with these changes, all without feeling they are suffering or dieting.

Sand_TIger

Something that helped me a lot especially at the start, and this went along with learning portion control, was to make substitutions.

For example, soda. Maybe I pick a stevia or splenda sweetened soda instead of a regular one. If I don't make any other changes that day that's still a nice chunk of calories saved. Or maybe I got with low sugar ketchup instead of regular. Or instead of using the normal salad dressing I use a lite version or switch it up entirely and use balsamic vinegar. Or fat free Greek yogurt with berries and some low cal sweetener instead of the regular stuff with all the sugar. A favorite of mine is using a good non stick pan with a touch of cooking spray instead of a lot of oil. Taste is almost the same yet I can easily save a couple hundred calories.

You probably get the idea - there are a lot of small swaps and tweaks you can make that can add up to a lot, meanwhile you are still eating your favorite things. When you're ready, adding in smaller portions or switching in more fruits and vegetables can improve things a lot. You can also do the same thing with exercise and find in ways to fit in "movement snacks" throughout your day.

I'm emphasizing the easy simple stuff here because a person can make some pretty impressive progress with these changes, all without feeling they are suffering or dieting.

justanotherloser007

CrustyOldMan wrote: »

I try to eat like a peasant.

Lols, I LOVE this... but I am not sure how much stone soup I can handle!!

IAmTheGlue

My husband is naturally thin/fit. He is very physically active at work, but he never eats a single bite more than full. He can put down a delicious dessert or whatever with 2 bites left and go “I’m full”.

If we go to a restaurant and his food is not on point, he won’t eat it. You paid XX for that… “nah, it’s not that good”

So, I try to not eat when I’m not actually hungry and stop when I have had enough, not eat it because I bought it, if that makes sense.

hititskip

I actually do this lol. I was recently out eating somewhere and I noticed an entire table of thinner people splitting two appetizers and a couple sides instead of each having their own. At another table two thin young women were each enjoying a delicious looking kids meal. I don't judge what anyone eats but I definitely look for good ideas.

fitslh85

I try to pick only the most tasty looking items. I tell myself to just take a small amount of the things I want to try first and if it something I like I can go back for a little more of the same, but in a smaller amount. If I picked something and don't like it I tell myself I don't have to eat it just because it's on my plate.

lacylucy1935

I do the same thing and also I have to tell myself if I have something in the house I don't need to eat the whole thing!! I have learned to eat in moderation, helps a lot and tracking because it is crazy how many carbs you can consume with just a handful of crackers here and there!!

wunderkindking

Just don't use me as your 'eat like a thin person'. I'm currently sitting at 122lbs at 5'5"

If I'm out at a buffet or pot luck (or holiday dinner or even just a bimonthly date night) what I'm going to eat is not going to be appreciably different than it was when I weighed 200lbs. Ie: I'm eating what I want, it's an occasion not my daily life. The last time I ate out, I ate a steak, loaded backed potato (sour cream and butter) some kind of forgettable vegetable side that came with the meal, wine, rolls with cinnamon butter, and peach cobbler.

If these events are more frequent for you, yeah, you're going to need a strategy of SOME sort. Pick the best thing/thing you want most. Eat dessert first (this was mine. I want to eat cookies. I will keep eating cookies. If I start with a cookie and then go eat broccoli I'm going to stop eating because I'm full and over the broccoli taste and broccoli has removed the taste of cooke from my mouth). Load up on salad and water before you go. Plan on talking a lot or an activity before or after, whatever. But infrequent things? Eh.

What I do to keep my head in the game at this stage is...not a lot. I'm absolutely coasting on new habits re: activity and DAILY, normal diet, and tbh those are the things you should look at when trying to take inspiration from other people. Not the special occasions or events. Looking at any snapshot is going to give you a really false image and where, I believe, a lot of the ideas like 'weight is all genetic; there are some people who can eat what they want and not get fat' or the reverse: being thin means being miserable all the time.