I respect people that eat
Kelley528
Posts: 319 Member
There are lots of different mentalities on this site about what you have to eat and how much you have to eat to lose weight. It seems like there is this percentage of people who dont even try to learn how to eat properly, how to balance nutrition, yet eat totally wasteful calories to meet their really low daily calorie goal. Yes, they lose weight but these are the people who will gain it all back. The only ones who can function normally eating like a rabbit are rabbits. I have seen diaries where people's meals consist of crackers, yogurt, fruit, maybe half a bagel, etc... no substantial food. Its a little bit frustrating to me to see this because I am actually very proud of what I accomplished through my fitness pal and even more proud of how much I get to eat and I am only eating between 1430-1590 calories a day ( I am still a few pounds away from reaching my maintenance weight.)
I am deciding whether or not I want to stop reading peoples food diaries or only look to weed out the people I dont want on my friends list. I want like minded people who are losing weight by actually eating--not starving themselves. I am not talking about the 1200 calorie peeps. I started on 1200 calories. I ate 3 portion controlled meals a day that I prepared for myself consisting of 4 oz meat/chicken/fish, 2 oz greens, half cup of starches, etc...my only snacks were fruit or 100 calorie popcorn. I just cut out the junk snacking while I was on 1200, as well as the added oils and other food add-ons I could live without while losing weight. At the 1430-1590 calorie level I am still eating the same meal sizes I just added sweets/salty snacks in addition to all the fruit I was eating before. I get to eat my burgers, steak, potatoes, chinese food ( just weigh it first), pizza, etc... I get to eat my donuts and ice cream ( also weighed in appropriate portions).
I just find it discouraging and frustrating when people are surviving on scraps to lose weight and dont even realize what the long term effects of that will be.
I learned to balance my meals, eat the right size portion for my particular body/size, and learned self-control. I am confident I can eat what I want and not gain weight. I am condident that when I go to restaurants, parties, or any other thing revolving around food that I am not going to wind up like a fat piggy a few months down the line when holiday season comes around. The only reason I gained weight is because I was no longer the gym rat I was in my 20's and didnt realize I couldnt eat the same. I wasnt a binger or constantly eating, I wasnt the type to go for seconds but I filled my plate way to much and ate bowls of ice cream that were the equivalent of 4 servings.
MFP taught me how to eat the right way, not starve myself. It made me accountable for myself. The odd thing is, before, I only ate because it was a necessity. I rarely felt hungry because my eating habits were so bad. But now, I love to eat and I eat less but just several times a day.
You've got to eat to lose weight, eat to maintain weight, and still get to eat out of enjoyment when you know how to do it.
I am deciding whether or not I want to stop reading peoples food diaries or only look to weed out the people I dont want on my friends list. I want like minded people who are losing weight by actually eating--not starving themselves. I am not talking about the 1200 calorie peeps. I started on 1200 calories. I ate 3 portion controlled meals a day that I prepared for myself consisting of 4 oz meat/chicken/fish, 2 oz greens, half cup of starches, etc...my only snacks were fruit or 100 calorie popcorn. I just cut out the junk snacking while I was on 1200, as well as the added oils and other food add-ons I could live without while losing weight. At the 1430-1590 calorie level I am still eating the same meal sizes I just added sweets/salty snacks in addition to all the fruit I was eating before. I get to eat my burgers, steak, potatoes, chinese food ( just weigh it first), pizza, etc... I get to eat my donuts and ice cream ( also weighed in appropriate portions).
I just find it discouraging and frustrating when people are surviving on scraps to lose weight and dont even realize what the long term effects of that will be.
I learned to balance my meals, eat the right size portion for my particular body/size, and learned self-control. I am confident I can eat what I want and not gain weight. I am condident that when I go to restaurants, parties, or any other thing revolving around food that I am not going to wind up like a fat piggy a few months down the line when holiday season comes around. The only reason I gained weight is because I was no longer the gym rat I was in my 20's and didnt realize I couldnt eat the same. I wasnt a binger or constantly eating, I wasnt the type to go for seconds but I filled my plate way to much and ate bowls of ice cream that were the equivalent of 4 servings.
MFP taught me how to eat the right way, not starve myself. It made me accountable for myself. The odd thing is, before, I only ate because it was a necessity. I rarely felt hungry because my eating habits were so bad. But now, I love to eat and I eat less but just several times a day.
You've got to eat to lose weight, eat to maintain weight, and still get to eat out of enjoyment when you know how to do it.
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Replies
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+10
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Perhaps you should open your diary to be viewable as it could help others, and you seem to have such a strong opinion on what people have listed on theirs. Just a thought.0
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Perhaps you should open your diary to be viewable as it could help others, and you seem to have such a strong opinion on what people have listed on theirs. Just a thought.
Man, OP, you've got your judgey pants on. I have friends that eat in ways I hate, but I don't ride their butts about it.0 -
I'm a little surprised at the backlash OP has received on this. This is what I took from her post:
-She respects people that eat well *regardless of their calorie goal*. She even specifically said she is NOT talking about the people who aim for 1200 calories.
-She wishes that people who scrape by on next to nothing (because they're not eating nutritious food) would realize that they can eat "real" food and still be within their goal.
-She's proud of her progress (40 something pounds? Go you!)
-She is trying to make a personal choice on how to handle the people who don't eat well. (Why do any of you care how she handles her friends list, btw?)
Anyway... +1 OP. I personally wouldn't un-friend someone who didn't eat "well" but I do like having people on my list that do. Helps give me ideas for my dinners and snacks. Whatever you decide, best of luck on the rest of your weight loss journey.0 -
You should be friends with me then, because I think I eat way more than that. By the way, I don't think I have any friends who eat too little. Most everyone is over 1200 a day and sensible about exercise.
My diary is open, feel free to add with a message and you must like giving feedback!0 -
There are lots of different mentalities on this site about what you have to eat and how much you have to eat to lose weight. It seems like there is this percentage of people who dont even try to learn how to eat properly, how to balance nutrition, yet eat totally wasteful calories to meet their really low daily calorie goal. Yes, they lose weight but these are the people who will gain it all back. The only ones who can function normally eating like a rabbit are rabbits. I have seen diaries where people's meals consist of crackers, yogurt, fruit, maybe half a bagel, etc... no substantial food. Its a little bit frustrating to me to see this because I am actually very proud of what I accomplished through my fitness pal and even more proud of how much I get to eat and I am only eating between 1430-1590 calories a day ( I am still a few pounds away from reaching my maintenance weight.)
I am deciding whether or not I want to stop reading peoples food diaries or only look to weed out the people I dont want on my friends list. I want like minded people who are losing weight by actually eating--not starving themselves. I am not talking about the 1200 calorie peeps. I started on 1200 calories. I ate 3 portion controlled meals a day that I prepared for myself consisting of 4 oz meat/chicken/fish, 2 oz greens, half cup of starches, etc...my only snacks were fruit or 100 calorie popcorn. I just cut out the junk snacking while I was on 1200, as well as the added oils and other food add-ons I could live without while losing weight. At the 1430-1590 calorie level I am still eating the same meal sizes I just added sweets/salty snacks in addition to all the fruit I was eating before. I get to eat my burgers, steak, potatoes, chinese food ( just weigh it first), pizza, etc... I get to eat my donuts and ice cream ( also weighed in appropriate portions).
I just find it discouraging and frustrating when people are surviving on scraps to lose weight and dont even realize what the long term effects of that will be.
I learned to balance my meals, eat the right size portion for my particular body/size, and learned self-control. I am confident I can eat what I want and not gain weight. I am condident that when I go to restaurants, parties, or any other thing revolving around food that I am not going to wind up like a fat piggy a few months down the line when holiday season comes around. The only reason I gained weight is because I was no longer the gym rat I was in my 20's and didnt realize I couldnt eat the same. I wasnt a binger or constantly eating, I wasnt the type to go for seconds but I filled my plate way to much and ate bowls of ice cream that were the equivalent of 4 servings.
MFP taught me how to eat the right way, not starve myself. It made me accountable for myself. The odd thing is, before, I only ate because it was a necessity. I rarely felt hungry because my eating habits were so bad. But now, I love to eat and I eat less but just several times a day.
You've got to eat to lose weight, eat to maintain weight, and still get to eat out of enjoyment when you know how to do it.0 -
Wow! I've been talking with my husband about just this same topic. I've been very upset to see some young girls appear on my friends list that are openly "ana." It hurts me to see the starvation and desperation from girls that are already slim. I ended up deleting them. It seriously made me anxious, and I can't just stand by and watch someone self destruct. I'm in this for healthy weight loss and I want to support and encourage others who feel the same. (Thanks for letting me vent). :flowerforyou:0
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OP: Says reasonable stuff
Someone else: Aren't you judgemental? Who cares how people eat, you judge mc judgejudge
Me: ....wait a minute! Isn't that judging the OP for judging?
Anywho. You are under no moral obligation to keep people on your list. You can get rid of them because they eat funny, have different philophies on weight loss, talk too much, don't talk enough, or have weird profile pictures. You gotta do what makes you happy and what builds the best FL for you. You don't have to coddle others, show other people the proper way, be nice to people, or let them hang out on your feed if you don't want to.
PS: If you are in the market for more friends after your purge OP, I like people who eat and eat well.0 -
I'm not sure you read her post, or at least we didn't understand it the same way.judgemental much? Why are you worried about what your MFP pals are eating? Are they supportive of your endeavors? If they are then they are great MFP pals. Some people start out wrong and learn in time. Give them time. Some people just want instant gratification, let them have it, they will learn and come around on their own time. All u have to do is be supportive at whatever leg of their journey they are on.
Worry about your food not everyone elses food diary.
I have tons of MFP pals who do 1200 cal, and i personally cant stand it, but they are on the same journey as me and I will always offer support.0 -
Well said. I agree with you. I do think it takes some people longer to figure out how to eat right. I know it took me a while.0
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OP: Says reasonable stuff
Someone else: Aren't you judgemental? Who cares how people eat, you judge mc judgejudge
Me: ....wait a minute! Isn't that judging the OP for judging?
Anywho. You are under no moral obligation to keep people on your list. You can get rid of them because they eat funny, have different philophies on weight loss, talk too much, don't talk enough, or have weird profile pictures. You gotta do what makes you happy and what builds the best FL for you. You don't have to coddle others, show other people the proper way, be nice to people, or let them hang out on your feed if you don't want to.
PS: If you are in the market for more friends after your purge OP, I like people who eat and eat well.
This.
I find it rather funny that people are riding her for checking people's diary, isn't what that feature is, in part, for. Aren't there a ton of threads complaining about people not commenting on food diaries, complaining people have closed diaries or not reading open diaries?
Do your friends list how you want it.0 -
I'm a little surprised at the backlash OP has received on this. This is what I took from her post:
-She respects people that eat well *regardless of their calorie goal*. She even specifically said she is NOT talking about the people who aim for 1200 calories.
-She wishes that people who scrape by on next to nothing (because they're not eating nutritious food) would realize that they can eat "real" food and still be within their goal.
-She's proud of her progress (40 something pounds? Go you!)
-She is trying to make a personal choice on how to handle the people who don't eat well. (Why do any of you care how she handles her friends list, btw?)
Anyway... +1 OP. I personally wouldn't un-friend someone who didn't eat "well" but I do like having people on my list that do. Helps give me ideas for my dinners and snacks. Whatever you decide, best of luck on the rest of your weight loss journey.
Thank you, that is all i'm saying.
Other people get all defensive and judgmental and are so quick to snap at people. I'm just saying what you paraphrased above.0 -
'People" are doing their best. Look around...the fact that they are trying anything puts them ahead of most people. At any given meeting at my workplace, 2 out of 20 people might be at a healthy weight. The rest are not just a bit out of shape. Many are 50 lbs overweight...far from a healthy situation.
Ideally everyone has their head screwed on correctly with respect to healthy and appropriate food choices.
If you keep only like minded people on your list then you only get one point of view. I wonder whether those with even more cohesive health plans will be dropping people off their lists too. Kinda defeats the point of forums though. Sort of a class structure or clique. Sorta like high school.0 -
I don't get why it bothers you so much what other people eat.
Maybe...just maybe...the fact that a person on MFP has started to count their calories daily, to exercise and think about moving their body more, is something that deserves credit and support and encouragement. Maybe being able to eat donuts and crackers and what-have-you *while staying within their caloric goal* is the only thing keeping them on the right path right now.
Maybe you should look at what people here ARE accomplishing, rather than focus on how much better your diet is than theirs.0 -
Remember being a young person? Remember that rejection just hardened your resolve? Pro ana people need to be included in conversations so that they get a real world sense that what they are doing is not the norm. Shutting them out just isolates them. Young people with eating disorders have a distorted view of their body and need realistic models. They also need to stay on here long enough that someone may recognize them and read their food diary so they can get help.0
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yes stop reading peoples food diaries .......I am glad you have almost reached you goal. Please don't start judging others now.SSDP0
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To be honest I just count calories I don't really pay much attention from the type of food they are from - empty/wasteful or not they are still calories which when I get my numbers right I drop weight or I maintain if I want to.. Not all of us pile it back on.0
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Remember being a young person? Remember that rejection just hardened your resolve? Pro ana people need to be included in conversations so that they get a real world sense that what they are doing is not the norm. Shutting them out just isolates them. Young people with eating disorders have a distorted view of their body and need realistic models. They also need to stay on here long enough that someone may recognize them and read their food diary so they can get help.
I don't think she was targeting pro- Ana either.
And I'm sorry, I can't do it. I won't do it. I have a stressful job. I deal with people in crisis all the time. I can't be that person here, this is a free time for me, an escape, entertainment, relaxation. I'm not saying they shouldn't have support but I can't be it. There are tons of people here who are will. I am not. This is a free site. I did not sign on to be a counsellor. Harsh? Maybe.0 -
I lost 114 lbs eating less than 1200 calories (didn't have an eating disorder either, other than I was fat) so I am not sure why this is such a hot number? You have to do what you have to do to create a deficit and lose weight. Now that I am at maintenance I get to eat more but the lower calories were necessary for me to get to my goal.0
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How is yogurt, fruit, and half a bagel not "substantial food"? That sounds like a great breakfast to me.
Besides that, I get your point, but I wouldn't spend too much time worrying about what strangers eat. That's not really going to get you anywhere, emotionally or otherwise.0 -
I lost 114 lbs eating less than 1200 calories (didn't have an eating disorder either, other than I was fat) so I am not sure why this is such a hot number? You have to do what you have to do to create a deficit and lose weight. Now that I am at maintenance I get to eat more but the lower calories were necessary for me to get to my goal.
It isn't. She said that's what she was eating. She specifically said she is not talking about those who eat 1200.0 -
I'm a little surprised at the backlash OP has received on this. This is what I took from her post:
-She respects people that eat well *regardless of their calorie goal*. She even specifically said she is NOT talking about the people who aim for 1200 calories.
-She wishes that people who scrape by on next to nothing (because they're not eating nutritious food) would realize that they can eat "real" food and still be within their goal.
-She's proud of her progress (40 something pounds? Go you!)
-She is trying to make a personal choice on how to handle the people who don't eat well. (Why do any of you care how she handles her friends list, btw?)
Anyway... +1 OP. I personally wouldn't un-friend someone who didn't eat "well" but I do like having people on my list that do. Helps give me ideas for my dinners and snacks. Whatever you decide, best of luck on the rest of your weight loss journey.
This0 -
Most people on starting on MFP obviously don't have a good grasp on nutrition. If they eat junk to fill their caloric goals, that's at least an improvment. People will change up the way they eat as they learn. There's really no reason to get upset over people who don't eat the way you'd prefer. And I think the reason you might be getting bad backlash is your wording. The whole: "I respect people that eat" can read as "I respect people that eat in a manner that I prescribe to be best and everyone else's eating habits are rubbish". To be clear, I don't think that's what you are saying but some people have certainly read it that way.0
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How is yogurt, fruit, and half a bagel not "substantial food"? That sounds like a great breakfast to me.
Besides that, I get your point, but I wouldn't spend too much time worrying about what strangers eat. That's not really going to get you anywhere, emotionally or otherwise.
Pretty sure she means a meal is Yogurt OR fruit OR half a bagel. Not all 3.0 -
By OP
You've got to eat to lose weight, eat to maintain weight, and still get to eat out of enjoyment when you know how to do it.
I get exactly where you are coming from!
I used to starve myself and now I am actually eating!
Keep on rocking! Great Great Post! :drinker:0 -
The amount of time I spend reading other people's food diaries is zero.
If someone asks me for their advice - then that is different. I'll check out their diary and give them some friendly advice - and I try to keep it as objective as possible. At the end of the day, I respect the food choices of my friends. The vast majority of people on my friend list don't share my nutrition outlook. I support them and encourage them regardless of what they do exercise wise or what they eat (or don't eat).
kind regards,
Ben0 -
The amount of time I spend reading other people's food diaries is zero.
If someone asks me for their advice - then that is different. I'll check out their diary and give them some friendly advice - and I try to keep it as objective as possible. At the end of the day, I respect the food choices of my friends. The vast majority of people on my friend list don't share my nutrition outlook. I support them and encourage them regardless of what they do exercise wise or what they eat (or don't eat).
kind regards,
Ben
That's cool.
OP doesn't have to do that nor is she a bad person for not doing so.
No one is obligated to be your damn friend on this website. They don't have to support you, respect your choices, or allow you to be their friend. I'm not sure where all this guilt tripping comes in (Did all of you get deleted and now you're mad at the very prospect?) but if people don't want to deal with you they don't have to. And they aren't wrong/mean/judgmental/rude for doing so.0 -
have you ever taken into consideration that that's all people can afford? for three months, after I lost my job, we were living off ramen, cheap hotdogs and mac & cheese. Usually only got maybe 700-900 cals a day. snack on crackers all day to save the rest of the food. Not everyone can afford the groceries to have a balanced meal three times a day every day. hot dogs and buns are $0.88, mac & cheese $.038, and ramen $0.15 where as a small salad is $1.48 or lettuce is $1.28. We had to decide what was more important. Rent or shopping. power bill or food. credit cards or worrying about the amount of cals we get. We make too much for food stamps and too little to fill the fridge so we have a "balanced" meal every day.0
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I respect people that don't judge food choices that others make
Reasons like this is why I will never share my Diary. People ask me why???? and this is the reason.
We are all different people with different likings. Just cause one person likes bagels doesn't mean everyone else on the friends list has to eat bagels or they will be judged by the "MFP Diary Police"
I am a Vegetarian....and at the time my diary was open. This friend on my list went nuts when she found out I never ate meat or fish. All of a sudden she thought she was a Dietician. Please... respect people's choices and don't judge. Losing weight is tough enough. Don't add to the pressure.
It's annoying.
Thank you0
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