Asking for help on how to lose weight the right way without using drugs

AlmostHomeNicky
AlmostHomeNicky Posts: 3 Member
edited June 6 in Motivation and Support
For the first time I am learning what it means to be okay with honesty and self-care. My entire life I've never given myself the gift of self-love. So I'm attempting to go outside my comfort zone and ask for help. This is very hard for me and I'm doing the one thing that I've never had the courage to ever do in my life. I just know the way I've lived my entire life hasn't worked so I am ready for this journey. I'm on a good path and it feels right so I got to trust in this. My problem is that when I lose the weight I feel really good about myself and full of life. however the one thing holding me back is that I'm using substance abuse to lose my belly fat. I have really bad knees, and I can't lose the weight with cardio. I have no problem getting I'm more muscular shape however it's the body fat percentage that I'm struggling with. I don't even know how to eat healthy or what that means but I'm trying to learn. So I'm trying to reach out for help and be honest with myself and I hope that it will lead to something better than the way I've been living. If you are going through this or you have experienced this in your past, your advice would be greatly appreciated. Also those out there who"ve discovered a healthy way of living, I would appreciate your feedback or support. God bless

Replies

  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,377 Member
    I have bad knees, too, so I empathize. I was lucky, managed to find some activities that - while they sometimes hurt - don't seem to cause further knee damage. (Whether there are things like that for you, and what they are, will tend to be different for each individual.)

    Still, I don't think cardio is key to weight loss. I did a good bit for over a decade and stayed fat - class 1 obese, even. For me, getting my eating to the right calorie level was the key to weight loss. I'd be doing well to burn 300-400 calories in an hour, when I was fat. I can eat 300-400 calories in 5 minutes or less, easy.

    My best advice for fat loss is not to try to lose weight fast, but rather to try to find sustainable new eating habits at a reduced calorie level. Personally, I recommend starting by setting up MFP for slow loss (maybe 0.5% of current weight per week, roughly). Then just log what you're eating now, and see how that shapes up against calorie goal. For me, there were several quick wins: Things that I was eating that weren't worth their calories to me for nutrition, feeling full or general happiness, once I knew how many calories they had. Those were easy cuts.

    As far as "eating healthy", there's a lot of weird mythology in the blogsphere about bad foods, superfoods, blah blah blah. Nutrition is important, but a huge range of foods have at least some nutrition.

    Once you have your eating pretty close to calorie goal most of the time while also feeling reasonably full most of the time, look at how your protein and fats stack up against the MFP default goals (which aren't bad goals for most people). If persistently low on protein or fats, try to tweak your eating habits to average close to those nutritional goal in grams, still choosing foods you personally like eating.

    Once that's going pretty well, look at your veggie and fruit intake. Try to get several servings daily of varied, colorful veggies and fruits. Choose ones you like, maybe try a new one now and then to expand your range. That helps dial in micronutrients and fiber.

    It's OK to do this over a period of time, as long as you're not starting with a diagnosed deficiency or diet-relevant health condition. Humans are adaptive omnivores; you can take some time to sort it out, focusing on habits (i.e., not by micromanaging daily details forever). Pretty good on average is fine; no need to be perfect.

    Along the way, you'll learn more about food and nutrition, and be able to modify your goals in a smart way to suit you and your situation. You can do this!

    Best wishes!
  • powpowz
    powpowz Posts: 8 Member
    Remember, above all else, celebrate the small victories and give yourself and your body grace... you're on the right path by just being aware of what holds you back. My knees are messed up too. What I find that works is yoga, stretching that moves and flows, and seated bike machines that will save your knees. If you can find a pool, there may be pool aerobics. Hey! Dont knock it till you try it... im only in my 40s and its hard work. Ha! Take it day by day... you got this!
  • Hobartlemagne
    Hobartlemagne Posts: 581 Member
    Big hugs to you Nicky. That must have been hard to reach out.
    There's a bunch of good people here. You can learn the way from all of us.
    One thing to understand- this is ongoing, and you wont learn everything all at once.
    I'm a big believer in incremental progress. Change little things regularly and it will all add up.
    Maybe start with one small goal, like what will you eat for breakfast.
    Most people demand the least variety from breakfast, so that makes it easier.
  • titus2cat
    titus2cat Posts: 395 Member
    I finally gave up and opted for total knee replacement. Best decision I ever made. Now I can log decent time on my elliptical machine, ride my bike, walk for miles. My blood pressure is better and I feel like I am finally trying to take care of my heart. I wish I had done it years ago.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,658 Member
    For the first time I am learning what it means to be okay with honesty and self-care. My entire life I've never given myself the gift of self-love. So I'm attempting to go outside my comfort zone and ask for help. This is very hard for me and I'm doing the one thing that I've never had the courage to ever do in my life. I just know the way I've lived my entire life hasn't worked so I am ready for this journey. I'm on a good path and it feels right so I got to trust in this. My problem is that when I lose the weight I feel really good about myself and full of life. however the one thing holding me back is that I'm using substance abuse to lose my belly fat. I have really bad knees, and I can't lose the weight with cardio. I have no problem getting I'm more muscular shape however it's the body fat percentage that I'm struggling with. I don't even know how to eat healthy or what that means but I'm trying to learn. So I'm trying to reach out for help and be honest with myself and I hope that it will lead to something better than the way I've been living. If you are going through this or you have experienced this in your past, your advice would be greatly appreciated. Also those out there who"ve discovered a healthy way of living, I would appreciate your feedback or support. God bless

    Can you swim? Swimming is a good weightloss exercise and no strain on knees. 600 calories per hour if you swim continuously.....
  • HopeFreedom
    HopeFreedom Posts: 8 Member
    Hi Nicky

    Thanks for your honesty. I have been free from drugs including alcohol for over 2.5yrs now. I used to abuse them to help me manage my appetite and weight as well as my emotions. They really harmed me and others over time though and eventually lost any benefits.

    I am still learning and facing the challenges around eating well and looking after my body. Truly realising there aren't any shortcuts is a big eye opener for me. I am shifting my methods towards sustainability.

    I have invested in a PT/coach for a year to have someone to be accountable to and to practice these habits until they are permanent. I am also giving more time to my mental health through therapy, DBT and looking after myself better.

    Wishing you luck. I believe in you!
  • KareninCanada
    KareninCanada Posts: 962 Member
    Shahroo Izadi might be genuinely helpful for you. This interview was excellent but she has done several. She is the author of The Kindness Method and had worked through substance abuse and weight challenges - and recognizes how much they have in common.

    https://youtu.be/44iAPrQoYU8?si=hglNXkxw2xAw5MGp


    Some notes I took down for myself.

    "It's not about finding yourself, it's about meeting yourself and being okay with who you meet."
    - Shahroo Izadi

    Don't make your plans based on who you aspire to be instead of who you are. If you start liking yourself as you are, even if you don't change, you create the best possible launchpad for change because you give yourself permission to be whoever you want and create your plans around that.

    i.e. - It's okay to not like getting up at 5:00 am, eating green beans, going to parties, doing intense workouts, being super extroverted, etc. Build your plans around what actually WORKS for you. 😉

    Exercise kindness toward yourself with both firmness and compassion like you would a child.

    You'll take better care of yourself and achieve your health goals if you believe you deserve it NOW rather than just as a reward later.

    Why do you believe that you don't deserve to be kind to yourself NOW?

    Granting yourself small wins and allowing yourself to be a little bit proud of yourself trumps tough love for most of us.

    Will it do any harm if you are kind to yourself today?