Cooking for a boyfriend on a bulk.

JoRocka

I also used the line, "I worked so hard to try to make something you will like. Please, at least try it."

you must be real proud of that right there.

sophiercook

why would that be anything to be ashamed of?

0somuchbetter0

I've come away from this thread with the following thoughts:

I'm glad I didn't live with a boyfriend until we were both adults.

I'm glad my husband isn't a picky eater. He can't even boil water but he eats anything I put in front of him. Lucky for him I'm a good cook.

I have little patience for picky eaters (adults, that is, kids are a different matter) in general. If you're too persnickety or whiny or precious to try something new, I will tend to think you're the kind of person who is very set in their ways, closed-minded, and rigid. Judgmental? Yeah, a little.

To the OP, I agree with the others. Let him double his portions of pasta if he wants to gain weight. You can't force-feed him something he doesn't want. If you're tired of cooking pasta, teach him how to do it and cook tasty food for yourself.

JoRocka

why would that be anything to be ashamed of?

Try it or eat your own food.

That's why- right there-is why the expression "poison is a woman's weapon"
guilting? emotional manipulation?

really? it takes 10 minutes to prepare veggies. 25 at the most if it's more labor intensive. Stop guilting him. I made it- eat it or don't.

I cook for myself 2-3 times a week- it takes me an hour or two to prepare my food for several days- I don't slave over it- it's one of the least labor intensive things I do all week. Does it take work? sure- but don't make it out to be some big to do- that's just shady under handed emotional manipulation- its' despicable behavior to me.

LaurenAOK

Try recipes like this one, it's italian, it's DELICIOUS and it's high in calories. You can replace the ground beef with veggie meat, I used to do it all the time when I was vegetarian and the recipe really tastes exactly the same. Trust me he will bulk up eating this kind of thing, haha.

http://allrecipes.com/recipe/baked-spaghetti-2/

sophiercook

well someone looked into that a bit too much. nothing wrong with wanting your partner to share something that you made and are proud of as far as I'm concerned. certainly does my partner and I no harm.

HaleyxErin

seems like pasta would help him gain

JoRocka

well someone looked into that a bit too much. nothing wrong with wanting your partner to share something that you made and are proud of as far as I'm concerned. certainly does my partner and I no harm.

I want him to like what I cook too- but I'm not going to GUILT him into eating it.

I'm not over looking- or reading to much into it. What she said was pure guilting manipulation. i can't stand that type of behavior. If you are okay with that's fine- but I have more respect for my partner and FOR MYSELF to just say- I made this (it's not like he doesn't know- he's in the fricking house)... and if he wants it- he'll eat it if not so what. I've told him to just try it before and that's it.

freebirdfitness

bulking isn't just about eating at a caloric surplus. Its about properly set macros, so eating two helpings of pasta may result in weight gain not muscle gain.
google how much protein your body can store at once and process, and how long it takes to process. A person's body cannot hold onto protein, so once that max amount has been processed it is time for some more. google how much protein is needed during a bulk, I do 1 gram per 1 lb of body weight. If just eating pasta in the past has not resulted in muscle gain then he may not be taking in enough protein. Also look up how much muscle a man can put on in one month, if he is gaining more than this it's fat. On a bulk you don't want to go crazy with your gain because when you go to reveal you will just lose some muscle trying to take all the fat off you just put on. You should also google what foods give protein if he is not eating meat.
If he calculates his bmr, plus how much surplus he needs and sets his macros right, as well as working until failure trying to increase weight often he will build muscle. If he's not than he's either not hitting his nutrient goals or working out hard enough.
You should take time to use google, or pm me for the websites. If you just use google instead of posting on the forums about your bf you wont get attacked. Because you need to understand we do not need some info, you gave us most of the wrong info We need his height, weight, macros ratios, daily caloric intake, and his strength training program. We do not need to know how well the relationship functions, about his relatives, really nothing like that needs to be mentioned just all suggestions so prevent you from a storm
pm me if you have a hard time locating this information, but this is the info you need to print for him, he can read it and re-formulate his plan.

Annan72

I was in a relationship like this where I "worried" about what he ate, and it didn't go well. Remember, the problem he had with his mom is that she didn't trust him in the kitchen. If you want to empower him, just set an example. Tell him how bad *kitten* he is, and then let him eat what he wants. If you don't want to cook it you don't have to. Just say "this is what I'm going to eat sweetie. I'm happy to make you some, or you can have what you like." This may feel weird, but it is the key to empowering him, not being a substitute mother for him.

Sporks42

He's a vegetarian and a momma's boy. I would say get rid of him.

Mmmm... My Italian is a momma's boy through and through, it's why I married him, coupled with his delish love of cooking =D

Edit to add; I don't know if I could handle him being vegetarian!

I_mustacheU4pancakes

Make him some chocolate chip waffles and a ten stack of banana peanut butter pancakes.

YoBecca

He's the one who asks me to cook him food that will help him bulk but in the end when I suggest something for him to eat he doesn't want to try it and asks for something he already knows. I am perfectly fine with the way he is now but he says he wants to be big and strong.

No, I totally get this - I currently live with a dude who asks me to cook stuff, but then turns his nose up if it seems weird to him, and then asks me to make him something else. He's also trying to be big and strong. However, he's my 6-year-old kid. And if he doesn't want to eat what I make, he can (and does) get his own food. I've also stopped wiping his @$$ for him, too.

It's fine if the division of labor in your house involves you cooking - and it's fine if he doesn't want to eat what you cook. But a dynamic wherein either 1) he asks you to cater to his high maintenance, picky, seemingly childish tastes, or 2) you try to force/trick/coerce him into changing - neither of these lead to a healthy relationship. I do most of the cooking here, and when my hubs doesn't want to eat what I cook, he says "don't worry about me, I'll get something." And I don't, and he does. Happy ending.

I also am with a mama's boy - but his mama taught him that when someone cooks you dinner, you say thank you and eat it. I wouldn't put up with this level of wishy washy pickiness from a child. The thought of it from a grown man makes my ovaries die a little bit.

SteveJWatson

Add an extra tablespoon of olive oil to whatever you make. For protein use hemp seeds. You can throw them into anything - tomato sauce, salads, cookies. Here's some decent recipes for them -

http://www.hippiebutter.com/hemp-seed-video-recipes/

Living in Italy, we already use a TON of olive oil! the hemp seeds is a fantastic idea though, thank you!

If you are living in Italy, then the answer is cheese.

Never met an Italian vegetarian though.....

Skrib69

[/quote]

He's the one who asks me to cook him food that will help him bulk but in the end when I suggest something for him to eat he doesn't want to try it and asks for something he already knows. I am perfectly fine with the way he is now but he says he wants to be big and strong. Also considering he has eaten Italian food all his life and hasn't gained any weight from it, I think the thing to do now is to try to cook something different than he's used to in order to help him gain the weight he's wanted to gain for years.
[/quote]

I think you have half your answer here. You ask him what he wants to eat. In our house, the is little discussion on this. My wife cooks what she thinks we will like, tied in with something she knows we will like. Work this with introducing 1 thing at a time and see what happens. When all is said and done, he isn't going to starve and you aren't going to kill him.

sunglasses_and_ocean_waves

He's a vegetarian and a momma's boy. I would say get rid of him.

All Italians are momma's boys.

WTH is that?

TheRealOrson

Came in thinking I might be able to help......then I read "vegetarian"

Givenitmybest

RawFusion-great protein supplement

phreekles

I read the title as "Looking for a boyfriend on a bulk" - thought it might be a chubby chaser post...

jayrudq

Ummmm, why don't you try being honest with him and tell him he is full of ****? If he really wanted you to help him, he would let you. You accept his request and try to help him and then he refuses. So, which is it? Does he want your help or not? Then, you will have your answer. And he either will accept your help or you can quit trying. Because, right now? You are wasting your time in frustration. And that sucks.

Oh, and the I will only eat meat I hunt for and don't hunt, is absurd. There are all sorts of options for eating sustainably raised meat. Again, this all or nothing mentality is not functional.

sticksandtwigs

I suggest searching the store at bodybuilding.com for a wide variety of vegan supplements. You name it, they most likely have it. Hope this helps!