Dieting vs. Lifestyle Changing...what do I do???

drivenheart85

So last year I was super weight loss girl. Beating challenges and murdering pounds left and right! I lost 50 pounds in 6 months! And then things slowed and I had a ridiculous desperate need for any and all junk food and laziness and everything ground to a halt and then started going backwards and I've gained back 37 pounds since then.

I remember I came on here for advice once and I received what could best be described as online message board assault or bullying...it was just cruel and mean and it was regarding my desire to keep pushing hard as I was doing. It still really bothers me the way people talked to me on that thread. I was not starving myself, I just had really high expectations because i believed the "effort equals results" lie...had my effort really worked, I woulda made it into a bikini, but because I tried so hard, I got injured instead....like if you were going to compare it to sports training. Training so hard to become great vs. training so hard to be great that you get injured and are benched. I guess no one ever explained to me that you could diet so hard that you spiral into fat world the way I did.

Minus the way it was "screamed" at me, I do understand the message, to take things slower, but how? What's "not dieting"? How do I lose the weight I gained back without make purposeful effort to lose weight again?

I also read a book by Josie Spinardi that talked about what I went through. The "slap back" from dieting as I call it. Turns out it's completely common to basically lose your mind with food after a good bout of dieting. But how come I can't diet anymore and other people can? Is it the impatient perfectionist personality type that counts calories and turns into a restriction monster? Why does society push people to diet so much if it's actually counterproductive? Where the heck do I go from here?

Lizzy622

It's the DIET industry that drives us crazy. Buy this book or that shake or the other pill and you will lose weight.

itsjustdawn

Lifestyle change :-) Definitely the way to go. Be realistic. Try to not feel restricted. Look at the positive things you gain from eating better the majority of the time. Allow for treats, not cheats. Set a healthy calorie goal. You'd be surprised at how high you can go and still lose weight. Replace your whites with wheats/browns. Drink more water. Little things add up

conniehv40

Well, I think that people can be really mean on this site (as well as other sites). I always know that going in before posting!! : )

As for diet, it really can't be a diet that cannot be maintained. If you cannot maintain your life style on your breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, exercise and water regime, then you have to "tweek" it.

Eat more protein so you are not hungry. Eat 400 calories a meal and leave a little for a nice snack. Eat less processed foods to avoid hunger.

I started with drinking water. I added cutting out bagels, i cut my cream in my coffee by half. i added walking and a weight class. I started cutting out after dinner snacking. (I went to my bed at 8:45 last night and read. otherwise, i'd be in my kitchen looking for food)

It seems like the weight you gained back could be because it was not realistic to keep up?

I don't know the whole story, but start today by taking a look at your food!!

TheCaren

My lifestyle change amounted to this. I ate less. And sometimes I moved more AND ate less. And sometimes I ate more so I made sure to move even more. That's it. No secret. You must eat less, move more, or both.

I don't believe in deprivation "diets". They are not, in my opinion, sustainable and they just encourage binge eating. Nothing was off limits for me except a couple specific foods that I literally have no self control with. But that's just me. Others may not have foods like that in their life.

All things are permissible, but not all things are beneficial. I didn't just count calories, I made my calories count. I didn't spend all day trying to figure out how I could squeeze those 100 calorie snack packs of goodies into my calorie count. I ate real food that kept me "non-hungry" virtually all the time. And when I wanted an occasional cupcake, I ate the dang cupcake. And I can't eat at a Mexican restaurant without chips and salsa, so I accomodated my activity level to make that fit in. Some days I went over calories. Some days I didn't. That's just real life.

I've been at maintenance since March and my weight loss appears to be sustainable. I never feel deprived. And I have not fallen into bad habits because I've been deprived of certain foods for so long (which is how I've regained weight in the past), because I don't beleive in depriving myself consistently of anything.

SW - 165#
GW - 125#
CW - 118# (fluctuates between 118 and 123 most of the time)

(Height 5'4", age 44 years, female)

samammay

Lifestyle change, to me, means awareness. If you are aware, you know what you are putting into your body and know its effects. Diet just describes the process of cutting calories to a deficit.

But most importantly is accountability. You have to be accountable to yourself. You lost weight, you know how to do it. You know calories and deficit. But with accountability, you have to answer to yourself the 'bad' food decisions you make. Is eating a desert going to help you, hurt you or have no significant effect? Only you can answer that. Mathematically you can figure out the answer and weight the consequences.

As for what people bullied you about... well, some people just feel the need to be right or be mean or break people down or just talk for the sake of someone listening to them.

Be true to yourself and what is right for you. Everyone else can eff off.

KANGOOJUMPS

eat
drink
be merry

Sabine_Stroehm

Lifestyle change :-) Definitely the way to go. Be realistic. Try to not feel restricted. Look at the positive things you gain from eating better the majority of the time. Allow for treats, not cheats. Set a healthy calorie goal. You'd be surprised at how high you can go and still lose weight. Replace your whites with wheats/browns. Drink more water. Little things add up

All good advice.

dlyeates

You need to take an honest look at your life and figure out what will work for you not only today or in the next 6 months but that you will be ok and satisfied doing in 1 year, 5 years, 10 years. Sure, when you lose weight you are cutting your calories more than you would if you are maintaining (diet) but what do you not want to give up in 1, 5, 10 years and what are you ok with cutting back on.

I personally love wine and ice cream so I make sure that they fit into my macros or I get to the gym to "earn" them. I try to eat cleaner not only because it will help me lose weight but because overall it's just healthier and that's what I want.....to be healthy. I want to teach my kids how to eat appropriately and have a good healthy relationship with food not just gain and then DIET to lose. I want it to be long term.

So do the research, pick a calorie amount, pick a health goal and then fit your lifestyle within these parameters. If you can't go without carbs then don't, if you want the option to have a drink every now and then then fit it in, if you know you are going to go out with friends find out the menu first if possible and get a good workout in to counteract any splurges.

I know that I work best, since I'm an overeater and food addict, when I give myself 1 cheat meal a month....NOT a whole day but 1 meal. And it's usually an all you can eat, and I'm usually stuffed to the point of being sick. But I try to do a good workout that day and I know I'm going and I enjoy it. And the next day I don't eat until I'm hungry and I eat lighter and then I get back on track.

A lifestyle change is creating the most healthy way of eating, exercising and living that you can sustain over a long period of time. Friend me if you want advice and support. I'm not perfect and had a major set back this year with my dad having a health issue and me not caring about myself but caring about everyone else.....I'm back up almost everything I lost but I'm back on track. I'm not perfect but I'm working my best to figure it out!!!

brisingr86

I'm sorry to hear that you felt so abused in your previous experience and that you got hurt. Welcome back and hopefully you have a better experience this time. What I love about calorie counting is that it doesn't tell me I can't eat anything, because I know when I've tried to be really good and restrictive on the sweets and soda that I love, I eventually fall off the wagon and binge. So the calorie counting tells me, I can have that Mountain Dew today, but I need to do the extra 15 minutes on the elliptical or whatever to make up for it. I've actually found that cutting back, I've developed less of a taste for the uber sweet stuff. I hope you can find the balance of what works for you. Just remember to set moderate goals and be patient. Loss of a pound a week is great. As you get closer to your goal, half a pound is probably pretty good. Good luck, and feel free to friend me.

eazy_

My suggestion is to eat at a deficit (10-20% of your tdee) based on your exercise and activity level until you reach your goal.

Log and weigh with a digital scale everything you eat.

EDesq

For Me, the difference in a Diet vs. a Lifestyle Change is that I know what I am doing is for LIFE...also, I know I do not have to make immediate changes (small ones are the key). The key is TRANSITIONING slowly so that the Changes will "Take". I also know that if I eat outside of My chosen Plan, it is OK, because that is Normal (but NOT often).

The keys for Me: (1) Develop an initial Eating and Exercise Plan that WORKS for Me (don't be afraid to Tweak); (2) Be Patient with Myself and the Plan; (3) Change to a New Plan when I discovered that the Old Plan NO Longer worked (as I lost weight, My Body Changed and so did its Needs); (4) STAY In-tune with Your Body, LISTEN to it, The Body has its OWN Intelligence and will Clearly give you signals as to its needs. (KEEP IT SIMPLE, Eating just ain't as complicated and full of numbers as people make it out to be...if there is a Formula involved RUN!!!)

Example: I was on South Beach, Atkins, Paleo, an On and Off Vegetarian, and some of My own Concoctions before I LISTENED to My Body and just Stopped the Madness. I gave up a FEW Bad habits (drinking alcohol, and then drinking Coffee daily). These alone out of My diet Stopped Cravings...from there My sense of WELLNESS lead Me to putting Green Tea into My life; from there, I was seeing such profound RESULTS, NOT on the scale (wt loss had stalled) but in My WELL-BEING and Life and feeling GOOD, I sought out GREATER avenues of Health. Basically My FOCUS was NOW on WELLNESS/Health, NOT wt loss; this lead Me to wanting to detox, which lead Me to Juicing, which lead Me to Vegetarianism, which lead Me to Veganism. Each step of the way My only focus was about Health and Well-Being, My Body became "sacred" and I was careful what I allowed in it, My Spirit and Emotional Well-Being was utmost (if eating something AFTERWARDS made Me sad, I would NOT eat it).

Long story short, when I looked up, a year had gone by and I was 70 lbs. lighter, a Vegetarian enjoying mono-meals, raw foods (60-70%), juicing, High energy, active, healing and Healthy. I am NOW a Transitioning Muculess Vegan (emphasis on Transitioning...could take years but OHHH what a Journey!). YouTube is a GREAT Resource and place to Research!


ETA: Most everything out here is to make money...The Human Being is un-important, so YOU MUST be Important to YOU. Don't buy equipment or supplements...until YOU see what you can and WILL do, and see what your Body needs at that time. Remember: Keep your MONEY, Supplements can not be absorbed by the Body (synthetics going into a Natural Body won't ever work!) Let FOOD (Fruits/Veggies/Herbs/Spices) be your Medicine...The BODY is Tough and Resilient, it only need a little good stuff and it is equipped to MAKE what it needs! Also, MUCH of these "Theories" like Supplement/Vitamin/Proteins are just Theories!

SkinnyFatAlbert

Temporary changes equal temporary results.

shannashannabobana

What's "not dieting"?

For me, it's about building habits. Not going crazy with something you can't sustain.

Habits like not drinking your calories, working out consistently (but also doing things you enjoy, some at a moderate pace, that you know you can continue with). For instance, my cousin and I several years ago started walking one day a week. And baring vacations, illness, etc,,we do this every week. Walk 3-4 miles at a moderate pace. It's habit, it's stress relieving (we go outside) and it alone will not make you lose weight but lots of habits like that add up.

Try to tackle things that make you go haywire and change your habits. Go for one or two things at a time and do things that you can do forever. Good luck!

The key is TRANSITIONING slowly so that the Changes will "Take".

Yes! I think it takes what 6 weeks to create a habit? Pick one thing and make it a habit.

This doesn't work with long term strict calorie restriction necessarily, because of the hunger urge, but it works very well with behaviors. If you're running by the donut shop every other morning, and you stop doing that for 6 weeks (or you drive a different route so you don't pass it) you will be out of that habit. You can pick your biggest challenges and work on them.

Lleldiranne

Think about how you want to be eating for the rest of your life. If completely giving up sweets or treats makes you sad (for example, if you never again ate cake at a party), then don't do it for the weight loss. If you can't imagine never going to a restaurant again, don't cut it out. If you hate running, don't decide that's the exercise you're going to do.

Then, take a look at what you're tracking with MFP. Calories is a default … it will always track that. Set it for a moderate deficit, maybe starting with lose 1 lb per week. Then look at the next categories … you want to track carbohydrates, fat, and protein; the others are all optional IMO. You want to be close to each of those at the end of the day, too. I would suggest that you either do a custom setting and increase protein OR look at what MFP gives you as a minimum. Try really hard to not go over on your carbs, but accept that it will happen from time to time. Edited to add: eat as close as you can to your calorie goal. It's okay to be right at zero, or even 10 or 50 calories over. You still have that deficit that MFP built in.

OK, so now you know what your macros are. Plan your day with healthy meals - protein, vegetables, fruit, whole grains should be most of your intake. But if there is room (within your macros) for a treat, and you want it, don't deny yourself! Just make sure that EVERYTHING is the proper serving size (or that you log what you actually ate, not just the random serving). You can have mac & cheese for dinner if you want, just take it a bit easier on starchy carbs earlier in the day, and pair it with some protein, like grilled chicken or meatloaf or pork, and a vegetable. You can have ice cream with your lunch if you want, just keep it to a small serving (if you're going to an ice cream shop, go with the smallest available - usually child size), log it, and plan your evening to be fewer calories. You can even go out to eat on a rare occasion, log it the best you can and accept that one day over won't kill your efforts (it's even possible to not go over, although much harder).

This way, when you have a craving, you can plan it into your day, adjust everything else, and satisfy it before it turns into a binge. You can lose weight eating chips, ice cream, poptarts, and pizza -- just not as much as you want or all in the same day!!

And of course, don't forget to find a reasonable exercise plan that you love, so that you look hawt when you get to your goal weight

jetlag

Diet (capital D) = means of losing weight, at whatever cost, no matter how painful, that you do not intend to stick with once you reach your goal.

diet (little d) = a system of eating, the food you eat every day, whatever they are. I.e. way of eating

Lifestyle change = making sustainable changes to your way of eating you can live with forever, that don't leave you craving "any and all junk food". Typically this does not include persistently low calories or complete bans on any food group (I consider "junk" a food group). If you love a food, don't ban it unless you have a legitimate medical reason.

These nothing wrong with you that means you cannot "Diet". You tried it and saw how crap it is. Now try it a different way, a way you can live with.

lovebig30

lifestyle change all the way at least for me. I cut out soda for the most part I will still have one on occasion if it fits in to my calories for the day. I still have morning coffee its just changed from a sugar cream filled one to a lite ice coffee 100 calories per oz and protein powder blended with ice to fill a 16oz glass. I got a bodymedia so I knew my calorie burn better learned estimates on machines and mfp were off for me. I eat more veggies and fruit. but still eat ice cream pizza and cookies. if I want to eat something I do I just weigh it out and log it. one of my friends does a HMR diet and even though she lost a great amount of weigh she will have to stay on the diet forever to not gain any back as her calorie intact is to low to eat real food and maintain that kind of calories I eat around 3 times as many calories as she does on average she loses weight twice as fast but miss out on living she cannot go out to dinner with family or have a piece of cake at a birthday party it works for her but would make me unhappy and deprived you have to find what works for you and what you can live with long term. feel free to add me as friend my diary is open.

aliasbee

One, diet the way most people use it is a misunderstanding. Diet is a lifestyle eating method. Like a routine, or a commute, or anything that describes a trend in your life. Bears are omnivores, that's their diet. They eat everything all year until winter when they don't eat at all because they're sleeping. Silly cute bears.

A lof of marketing uses it as if it's a short term "bust your balls" race to the finish line. I've known many people who went through this kind of behavior off and on for decades. It's all a diet, their diet is just feast or famine, fast or binge. Both sides are part of the diet.

The most important part of adjusting your diet is to be aware of your behavior. Before you even decide what works the best for you, I think the key step anyone can take is to record your habits. If that means recording calories and weight that's fine, if that means just writing down when and where you have meals and exercise, that's also fine.

The writing things down helps because you might feel anxious or cranky one day, and you can look at your record and go "hey, I did something different here and it's directly affecting my mood" or maybe it affects your weight. If you have a record of it you can have a greater awareness of your good and bad habits and adjust them accordingly. It's hard to change something you aren't aware you are doing.

I wasn't aware, for example, that moving to a more congested city cut my exercise by about 90% because the lack of quiet scenic places made me feel trapped. I've compensated by getting some cheap indoor exercise devices so I can listen to music I like or watch shows I like without feeling nervous or trapped while I'm walking around. So far I've only gained back about 10% of my old activeness but I'm slowly trending towards the positive.

I've been keeping to a calorie amount that's about -1000 deficit of my daily energy consumption to lose weight. That's because I know I don't exercise enough to lose weight just by eating normal. I expect this to slow down when my fat% does, and I will slowly increase the amount of food I'm eating (and consequently the speed at which I lose weight) as I get closer to my goal. Theoretically I will have more energy when I'm a more healthy bodyfat percentage. I anticipate that not everything will go as I expect.

I really understand the desire to put full throttle on to lose weight. That's why recording things is important. A little voice in the back of my head is always telling me things like "If you just eat even less, you'll lose weight faster." But I have my record and data to argue with it. "Now see here, I'm losing it consistently. And these medical studies say that blablabla so not eating at all is a really bad idea"

It's normal to think like this, we get excited and impatient and irrational, thoughts arent actions, however. We just have to install personal breaks that relate to ourselves and how much we need to slow down. Some people are perfectly happy losing half a pound a week or less towards their goal, and can keep on target without feeling down. As for me I trust myself to push faster without burning out, and if I am going too slow I'll get depressed.

If other people's words can discourage you, you need to make an effort to build stronger train tracks and constantly check the rail for weaknesses, or just don't talk to people online, whichever you have to do.

I hope that the helpful people will outweigh the harmful (intentionally harmful or otherwise). Please feel free to seek encouragement and advice all you like here.

rrsuthy

I'm sorry there were unkind words said to you. I've been somewhat close to where you are. I did WW and got to goal weight. Within 6 months, I'd gained back 8lbs and within a year, I'd gained back 10. Why? Well, there were a variety of reasons. One reason was I emotionally ate my way through my divorce. The other reason was that I was hungry - seriously tired of being hungry, which I was on WW. So, I'm working my way back to where I want to be, but I'm doing it a bit differently this time.

I saw a sign on pinterest that really spoke to me "Tired of starting over? Quit giving up". OMG that was so me. I remind myself of this everytime I want to scarf a bowl of cocoa puffs (my favorite food and one that I can eat and eat and eat). So, this time, I'm looking for more filling foods - not just foods that fit a number. Let me say, that I am NOT bashing WW - it's a great program. However, to eat my allotted number of points, I would have to eat a bag of FF popcorn for lunch. I'd eat egg whites on a whole grain english muffin for breakfast and then chicken and veggies for dinner. I would go to bed hungry most days. Admittingly, I still go to bed hungry on many days. I found, through WW, that I can NOT eat back my exercise points. It prevents me from losing weight. On big cardio days, I need to eat back some, but not all.

I also think that when I did WW and reached my magic number, something snapped in my head and led me to think "ok, done with that, let's find something else". I'm at the age where weight loss is a real struggle, I can't just cut calories and lose 5lbs. It takes months for those 5lbs to go away. So, it finally sunk in that I need to change my relationship with food. I need to quit thinking of it as anything other than fuel for my body. It isn't a treat, it isn't an emotional crutch, it's just fuel. That has really helped me. Of course, I'm still dumb enough to occassional backslide, but not nearly as often. I find that if I prevent myself from getting overly hungry or tired, my cravings for junk are minimized or gone completely.

So, good luck with making the transition from thinking of losing weight with a diet to losing weight via life style changes and building new habits.

DopeItUp

Dieting is a temporary thing. Hence your weight loss will inevitably be just that - temporary. Maybe a few years at best. Lifestyle change is just that, it's for a lifetime of health and fitness. Which do you choose?

SarahIluvatariel

Bump. Awesome thread. I love this kind of encouragement and wisdom.

itsjustdawn

My suggestion is to eat at a deficit (10-20% of your tdee) based on your exercise and activity level until you reach your goal.

Log and weigh with a digital scale everything you eat.

This right here is good advice.

drivenheart85

Thank you so much for everyone's input; you're all very wonderful.

I think I need to not diet and, in the terms of marketers and magazines and pretty much all society that intends to benefit from pushing fast results. And I need to stay away from numbers. I get a little control freak-ish with the numbers. Pounds, percentages, calories eaten, calories burned, exercise minutes, and on and on. I can make a 499 calorie workout sound like a failure...it's just not right. lol

I think awareness for me can help be achieved through a diet and exercise journal...not a calories burned and eaten tracker...but just something where I have to write down, can look back on and be accountable for...the food I've eaten and the exercise I have or haven't done. Once again, I gotta stay away from numbers.

I guess I get a little hazy though when it comes to pace. If I'm not going to weigh myself, it's gonna take like 2-4 weeks before I can tell if what I'm doing is enough or not. I may have to reconsider this approach. There are various other methods like clothes fit, body measurements, etc. but then I'm into numbers again and the impatient version of myself takes over. Perhaps I just need to work on my impatience. lol

marcypantz1

I set a reasonable calorie range for weightloss and I like to follow the 80/20 rule : 80% of my calories I eat super healthy and clean ( unprocessed Whole grains, lean proteins, Fruits and Veggies, Low Fat Dairy) and 20% of them are treats. Sometimes it's divided by week, but most time it's divided by day ( ex - If I'm at a 1300 calorie allowance i would allow for 260 calories of splurge - like a measured out portion of ice cream or cookies or salty snack) You don't feel deprived or guilty ( because it's within your calorie count!) A lot of the time I end up just having an extra portion of something healthy because I just don't want a treat - sometimes when you give yourself permission the cravings go away.

Another thing that has helped me thus far is journalling. It can be in your food notes, a private virtual journal, or even a pretty little spiralbound one you keep with you. Write down when you are struggling and wanting to turn to food to comfort you, include what you are feeling and the circumstances that are occuring. It can help you get to the root of why you are struggling with your food issues. It takes a lot of self-reflection and it's really difficult, but it is so worth it.

Another HUUUGGGEE help for me has been finding a physical activity that I truly enjoy. I happened to fall in love with running. For you it could be Zumba, Yoga, Walking, Circuits with a Trainer, Hiking, Swimming, Kayaking or whatever. Find an activity that you enjoy and feel free to explore and switch it up. It helps with stress levels, confidence, etc.

And lastly, be patient with yourself. Learn to love yourself wherever you are in the process. This is huge - because you can lose 10, 20, 50, even 100 lbs, reach your goals and still not be satisfied with where you are.


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Whyareyoumad

Hi guys, new to the forums. Questions between diet and a lifestyle change are easy for me. After I turned 40, I really starting gaining weight. For me, it had to be a lifestyle change. I joined a gym, started running, and became more aware of what I was eating. This site is invaluable for me because I can track what I eat, so far I have only gone over my calorie target one day. My goal is to get to single digit BF % in a month, so far so good!

bcattoes

I also read a book by Josie Spinardi that talked about what I went through. The "slap back" from dieting as I call it. Turns out it's completely common to basically lose your mind with food after a good bout of dieting. But how come I can't diet anymore and other people can? Is it the impatient perfectionist personality type that counts calories and turns into a restriction monster? Why does society push people to diet so much if it's actually counterproductive? Where the heck do I go from here?

If you restrict calories you are dieting. Whether you do it for 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years or 6 decades, it is still dieting. Call it whatever makes you happy and keeps you on track, but it is what it is.

The problem wasn't that you were dieting, it was that your diet was unsustainable. If you develop a way of eating that you can live with forever, then all you need to do when you are done is eat a little more of what you've already been eating.

Or perhaps make no changes at all. If you eat maintenance calories for your goal weight/size, then theoretically you should be able to make no changes at all for maintenance. You should simply stop losing when you get there.

Stage14

This is actually a really good example of why I don't participate in challenges or drop my calories more to get faster results. No offense or judgment for those who do either, but for me, I eat at a smaller deficit so that I can eat the types of foods that I can be happy eating for the rest of my life. And I workout on a schedule and with a routine that I know I can and want to maintain for the long haul. The results are slower, but there is far less chance of backlash when it finally comes time to switch to maintenance instead of losing.

For example, when I did this last time, I was eating tons of raw veggies for all of my snacks, doing salads for lunch almost daily, cutting out most bread and pasta. Today, I am eating tilapia for lunch with veggies yes, but also rice and sauce. Tonight, we're having whole wheat spaghetti and garlic toast for dinner. And I'm still within my calorie limits AND macro balance. I could easily eat the way I have for the last month for the rest of my life with no problem. I still get ice cream sometimes, still have the occasional "bad day" of fair food or a giant Thanksgiving dinner, but the bulk of my diet is healthy food that I ENJOY. The same goes for my workout routines. I do them because I LIKE them and how they make me feel. it's a longer slower road, but I don't have to worry about roadblocks or unexpected U turns on it.

mindy2780

To me to "diet" is to change the way I eat for a short term to meet a goal- lose weight or fit into a smaller size. But then when the goal is reached to go back to "normal" eating.
A "lifestyle change" is when you try to change the way you eat permanently. Often this MUST be less drastic than a "diet change" because you want to keep it up long term. And if not less drastic than certainly more gradual.
Quick fix diets like reducing your caloric intake drastically, or exercising every day multiple times a day (when you really don't have the drive or the time or both), diet drinks, diets where you eat only foods that are green, etc. Those types of diets rarely work because you can't keep them up long term. And when you return to your original eating habits you will end back at the original weight because nothing changed.
If you want to be healthier and weigh less and keep it up long term you must make changes you can handle long term. If you love chocolate then giving up chocolate completely forever most likely will not work. But limiting your chocolate, or balancing it with exercise will work. If you deprive yourself of things you like you are more likely to "cheat" on your diet or binge when you do allow yourself to eat those foods. But if you find a way to keep things in moderation you are more likely to succeed.
I have found that losing weight slowly means I am more likely to keep it off long term. Losing weight quickly means I usually gain it back fairly easily.

drivenheart85

I guess it's true though that what I was doing last year was unsustainable and that's probably why I got jumped on everyone to begin with. Everyone has a lot of great insight. It looks like for the most part it's important to find what's best for myself and not what some program, guru or friend has told me. I've always known this...but it's a hard method and ignorance is bliss. Trial and error to see what works and what doesn't is tiring and takes a long time before you get it right, but if you're ever going to really get it right, that's the path to take.

drivenheart85

Oh and I should add that the "need for speed" was fueled by body disgust. That's the other lesson for me. I was overweight and I took it as a personal insult and personal failure, I wanted it off ASAP. And when I lost 50 pounds of it...I still wasn't happy, still wasn't skinny enough.

As someone said above, even if you lose the weight, that doesn't mean you're going to like yourself more. You have to start with that from the beginning.

mazmataz

For the first time in my life, I think I have found a way of living/eating that works. The downside is that results will be slower, but I have accepted that in return for there actually being long-term, sustainable results!

I do not deprive myself of anything I crave or want...and I definitely do not deprive myself of socializing around food and drink. If I want a piece of chocoloate or a chinese takeaway (I'll have a serious think about if that IS really what I do want), I'll have it and either count it in my calories, or work out enough to cancel it out. If I go on a weekend food and drink bender with my friends, I accept the fact that it might take me a week or so to work back from it.

As a result I've found that I have LESS cravings and I instinctively choose better food - I've played this game for too long now and I'm sick of short term solutions and being the girl on the eternal diet. This is working! Slowly...but it's working