I can't help myself

RunHardBeStrong · September 2013

I agree with everything that's been said above. You have to get out of your comfort zone in order to start making changes. Not only will you see physical changes but it is here where you will have the biggest mental changes which is the most important aspect in order to reach your goals.

Carolyn_79 · September 2013

Get your music and go for a walk. Any movement is an improvement at this point. You don't have to kill yourself in a grueling workout. If you like sports, look into joining a local team.

osothefinn · September 2013

If you are actually depressed, get that managed first. However, everyone is correct. Until you want to do it you won't. Nothing any of us can say will get you to follow the program until you want to do it. I sat on my *kitten* on got bigger for 25 years. Pressure from people got me to do something for a month or two every couple years, but until I decided to do it for myself nothing really worked.

Besides, being dependent on an outside source for motivation can fail. What happens if that source goes away? Get your depression managed, try get a healthier relationship with food so you don't comfort eat, then work on the program.

EmmieBaby · September 2013

This is motivation, you need to stop thinking negatively and being defensive when we are trying to help you. losing weight is hard, trust me, you will have to break the cycle of self hate by pushing yourself into doing positive things.

As mentioned before, start small, eat at a deficit...replace soda with juice then juice to water....start walking more, try some workout DVD's or apps. if you want to run, get a kickass soundtrack and go!

you have to start with a shove, cause no one will shove you harder then yourself.

stumblinthrulife · September 2013

But that's the point. There is nothing that we can say that is going to make you magically want to workout. Nothing in the world.

It has to come from within. That's how everyone here did it, and we can only advise you from our own experience.

No one I know gets up at the crack of dawn and runs 10k just because someone on their newsfeed will say 'great burn!' when they get back. They do it because they are disciplined, and they know that it's what's needed to reach their goal.

No one is trying to be mean. They are trying to get you to the point where you realize inside yourself what needs to be done, and you get out there and do it. Everyone on MFP wants to see everyone else succeed. No matter how mean they sometimes may sound.

My challenge to you is to prove people who have called you lazy wrong. Choose a day this week, schedule a workout (whatever you want to do as a workout, even a mile walk), and do it. Do it because you need to, not because it will make you happy.

specialemy · September 2013

Have you ever heard of the saying "A year from now you would've wished that you started today"? I never ever thought that saying would mean anything to me until now. Despite how I lost weight I had reasons to start - and then I started really caring about my health. Discover what is your own reason on why you want to start getting healthier and then fight for it.

It was never fun or easy in the beginning for me, and many times I quit...but my reasons for getting healthier still lingered in my head. And so I got back up and wanted to keep going. I guess sometimes you've got to hit rock bottom in order to start heading up to your goals. Much luck to you and hope you find what it takes to get there.

MinnieInMaine · September 2013

You know what? I hated sweating in the beginning too. It meant I was working hard and put me outside of my confort zone. But you can't be comfortable and fit - it's one way or the other. You don't technicaly have to exercise to lose weight (you just have to eat at a calorie deficit) but you made a promise to your counselor that you would, and so you should. it's the right thing to do.

There has to be something that you would enjoy doing and that wouldn't make you sweat, or at least not much. How about turning some good music on and dancing around your house? Or go for a walk in the morning when it's nice and cool out - or walk indoors like on the treadmill at a nice air conditioned gym or at the mall?

No one is trying to belittle you or bully you - it's called tough love. Most of us have been in your shoes and have made every excuse in the world to avoid going outside our comfort zones to do what we knew needed to be done... (Hell, I even blamed my failures on my friend because she supposedly wasn't supportive enough. Come on now, that's just pure BS - it was never anyone's fault but my own, pure and simple!) But then we sucked it up and did it anyway and that's part of what leads to success. That's why the say if you want it bad enough, you'll do it. Really there's no other way. Either you want to lose the weight and you put forth the effort required to accomplish that or you keep doing what you've been doing and continue to drive everyone nuts (per your post).

Imabemee · September 2013

After reading your post history I see a trend of making excuses.

ndj1979 · September 2013

enjoy your path to obesity then...

I read through most of the posts and I saw a lot of great ideas and people encouraging you to get up, get out there, and do something..but apparently you took it the wrong way...

You are never going to get the results that you want with an attitude like that.

I'm out...

MichelleB69 · September 2013

Your brain is holding your body hostage....simple as that.

jaxxie · September 2013

I would strongly recommend that you look in the Popular Blog Post for one called Motivation written by liftnlove. Print it out and put it up everywhere!

Other than that, I agree with the advice your are being given, we all had to start somewhere....baby steps. Good luck.

4legsRbetterthan2 · September 2013

I think the thing you are missing is you are not the first person who didn't want to work out. Very few people who are not already doing it routinely enjoy working out and dieting. You just have to decide you want it and that losing the weight is more important than your aversion to those things. There really is not trick to it though, you just gotta do it.

NoAdditives · September 2013

No amount of encouragement or motivation from others is going to get force you to change your habits. Only you can do that, and it will happen when you're ready.

LatentColors · September 2013

I'd starve myself if I could.

gabbygirl78 · September 2013

This! This is it! You got to want it and want to work for it! I had to learn that the hard way!

prettigirl01 · September 2013

i understand you when you say this. its not what people say its how they say it but we often get defensive when we cant handle the truth. i am the same way because i am a very defensive person. if you don't like what someone says don't even speak on it. just read it and move on. im in the same boat as you im no better than you are. please don't let people get you in a funk. its all love

Jewlz280 · September 2013

So, out of all the replies you got, that's the only thing you're going to take away from this whole thread? That maybe one or two people actually said to just do it? You aren't looking at the big pic of life at ALL. And quite frankly, all of the caring and good advice is wasted on you if all you are going to do is complain about the 1 or 2 that you THOUGHT were belittling you. No one is belittling you. What everyone is trying to tell you is to just get up and do it. Even if you don't want to. Get out of your head and quit listening to that little voice and just to what has to be done. You may hate it today, tomorrow, next week or even next month. But once you start to feel it, it will be a whole new world. And no one can do it for you. You, YES YOU, have to do it! There is no hand holding in the real world. Every day isn't going to be skittles and rainbows. Some days are going to be storms and mud -- but you truck right on through knowing that the bucket of skittles are on the other side somewhere.

If you are depressed, really depressed, you need to seek medical help. Otherwise, don't get onto a public forum saying you 'can't help yourself' and then falling back on the EXCUSE of being depressed. That term is thrown around loosely too often to the point where folks who are medically depressed get ignored because of it. So, if you are in fact depressed, get help. If you want to lose weight, help yourself. The end.

Papillon22 · September 2013

It sounds like you want to lose weight, but not work for it. Maybe it'd be a good idea to explore all of this in therapy.

diannethegeek · September 2013

Fellow depression sufferer here. The thing about these boards is that different people respond to different kinds of support. It looks like you got a lot of tough love in this one, and that's super motivating for some people. Others feel attacked by that kind of motivation, even when there's no actual attacking going on. I honestly hope that you'll come back to this post in a few days and reread some of the responses.

I exercise because I know that it will help with my depression. When I exercise, especially outside in the sun, I feel great. Even if it's just a short walk. When I don't exercise my therapist and I have noticed my mood drop. She always catches me if I go more than a couple of weeks without some activity.

Even if it's just a short walk, get your workout clothes on and go. Even if it's just 15 minutes. Chances are that once you start you'll go a little longer than planned. Eventually it will become a routine, but for now sometimes you have to drag your motivation along kicking and screaming.

EmmieBaby · September 2013

why? food is not the enemy, your own thoughts are.

I can't help myself

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