Exercise for woman with naturally big shoulders?

TaurusV
TaurusV Posts: 66
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi guys, I am doing cardio and strength training for 2 months, 4x week, have been on gym before in not a distant past.

I've big shoulders since I know myself as human, and I always wanted swimming as a hobby/sport, my dad competes amateurish and I always loved water, but I am very afraid of looking too manly.

I m not fat but not thin either right now, around 25% fat, but my arms are around 14', I am 5'2''. Is this too much for a woman?

Would swimming 2x week make arms or shoulders big? Or is it a myth? Only athletes become like that?

Thank you ladies and boys for the advice :)
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Replies

  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
    No exercise can change your genetics. If you want to swim, go swim and if you get big shoulders, well rock them. I love having muscular shoulders because they balance my pear shape.
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    But mine are big shoulder and arms, the things that grow more in me are them and the legs become thin. Would swimming worsen it? Do you swim regularly?

    I guess you are right, is a very sexist world. but I feel kinda bad when I see me and hubby together and realize I have bigger shoulders than him :(

    You feel ok with it? Nobody ever bullied you out of it? I went all my high school without wearing tanks and sleeveless.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Same exercises that women with narrow shoulders do. Swim.
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    I have large shoulder muscles too and they build with swimming, as they would with any exercise.

    Why is this a sexist world?
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    Look like a man? Having muscles doesnt make you look like a man. As long as you dont have that view then youre fine.
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    I don't care what other people think.....and if I have bigger shoulder than a man.....he does not have nearly enough muscle mass and really, this is not my problem.
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    I don't care what other people think.....and if I have bigger shoulder than a man.....he does not have nearly enough muscle mass and really, this is not my problem.

    YES amen to this
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    I don't care what other people think.....and if I have bigger shoulder than a man.....he does not have nearly enough muscle mass and really, this is not my problem.

    YES amen to this

    Yes.
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
    TBH if you have big shoulders/arms naturally, then no exercise is going to change your shape. They may get bigger or smaller through exercise (I don't swim now, used to regularly and never had an issue with it), but at the end of the day just do what you want to do a who cares what others think.

    Personally I'd quite like bigger shoulders, I don't care if others don't, because that's what I want. Rock what you've got! If you're worried they look out of proportion you could always work on adding a bit of size/muscle to your legs to balance things out?
  • laureni443
    laureni443 Posts: 2
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    FACE PALM
    I am having trouble figuring why you're changing your body based on what your EX said.

    And if youre telling me that women with muscles look like men, no they dont. The definition of a woman has changed and you need to stop living in the 50s
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    I don't care what other people think.....and if I have bigger shoulder than a man.....he does not have nearly enough muscle mass and really, this is not my problem.

    YES amen to this

    Yes.

    Agreed!
  • kirkor
    kirkor Posts: 2,530 Member
    Is this a conversation with spambots?
  • underwater77
    underwater77 Posts: 331 Member
    I swam my whole life, and I still do. I definitely have big shoulders and arms, but they give me strength enough to pull off some pretty nice poses in yoga these days.

    I have been on the receiving end of a few snide remarks from *kitten* guys in the past, but you just have to look at the source.

    I love to swim. I love yoga. They both make me who I am today. I would never even consider giving up either because of someone's perceptions of shoulders that are "too masculine" for a female.
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
    Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly

    8605468115_89f6bfc434_m.jpg
    image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly

    8605468115_89f6bfc434_m.jpg
    image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

    U look gorgeous and dont bother with wut the OP say
  • Phoenix_Warrior
    Phoenix_Warrior Posts: 1,633 Member
    Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly

    8605468115_89f6bfc434_m.jpg
    image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

    Zomg that's my dream body. That and a pic of Jillian Michaels <3
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    I have naturally broad shoulders...I have never minded them...

    The offset my wider hips and make my waist look smaller.

    As for what anyone else might say about them...they just jelly.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I bet, that when you can finally do pull ups, your arms and back are going to be exquisite.
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly

    8605468115_89f6bfc434_m.jpg
    image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

    Zomg that's my dream body. That and a pic of Jillian Michaels <3

    Watchout OP say she a man lol and thats just society
  • Italiangrey
    Italiangrey Posts: 12
    My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

    FACE PALM
    I am having trouble figuring why you're changing your body based on what your EX said.

    And if youre telling me that women with muscles look like men, no they dont. The definition of a woman has changed and you need to stop living in the 50s


    thas right and its offensive
  • laureni443
    laureni443 Posts: 2
    I was just giving you crap earlier, i actually do agree that women who are more muscular than average are manly and look weird. I'm sorry that you have man shoulders. You need to atrophy them to get them smaller.

    I dont like the butch look at all. I like women to look like women.
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    I do pull ups and Insane 4x week. I have always been able to do most manly exercises. I am not saying is A BAD thing girls. Dont get me wrong. I want to be strong and healthy. BUT bodybuilder is not my profession, and I dont enjoy stupid men jokes behind your back in the office. I know I think my EX was kinda sexist, maybe cause he didnt want a woman to be stronger than him. But I had this self conscious thing since I was like 10.

    My sister did ballet, my mom wanted me to do it and I ran away from it in the 1st week. I always asked her to let me do martial arts, had to wait till I was 18 to do it myself! Where I lived in childhood and even living in a new country these stereotypes about women are so strong. :(

    I never meant to say is not a good thing. I just dont want to have big manly shoulders, specially because my legs dont accompany the rest of upper body, like my dad body.

    That pic of that girl is amazing, but sadly I dont know how I would pull it up even, if I personally liked it, around the people that has been around me. Is like I attract these people.
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    ..
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly

    8605468115_89f6bfc434_m.jpg
    image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

    Zomg that's my dream body. That and a pic of Jillian Michaels <3

    Watchout OP say she a man lol and thats just society

    Wow, thanks for bullying me. I never said I THINK we women with large shoulder and arms are men. I said that I have been bullied because of it sometimes and sadly I didnt grow up/live in the same community as you. :(
  • TaurusV
    TaurusV Posts: 66
    I swam my whole life, and I still do. I definitely have big shoulders and arms, but they give me strength enough to pull off some pretty nice poses in yoga these days.

    I have been on the receiving end of a few snide remarks from *kitten* guys in the past, but you just have to look at the source.

    I love to swim. I love yoga. They both make me who I am today. I would never even consider giving up either because of someone's perceptions of shoulders that are "too masculine" for a female.

    Thanks :) for the support and understanding it. So much bad comments. I am not part of a bodybuilding community or a supportive group, and those remarks or being bullied by school boys for something you cant change is so bad. I love yoga too, but I still didnt let myself go swimming as an exercise, maybe I will, and see what happens. I hope I can become like you and just ignore or understand is jealousy.
  • samammay
    samammay Posts: 468
    FWIW, there isnt a sane guy in the world that is going to think you are manly, based on your profile pic.

    As for what guys might say... do you really care what drivel some moron who isnt good enough for you thinks? Inferior guys(people) use insults to try to bring others to their level so they have a shot with them.

    The only person who can let you feel bad about anything is you.

    Rock those shoulders and ignore the haters. You are better than they are. Not to be a snob or anything, but if they were anything, they wouldnt need to say anything mean.
  • Irenaekl
    Irenaekl Posts: 116 Member
    I have very broad shoulders as does my sister - there is absolutely nothing we can do about it. I can feel every bone in my shoulder joints and no matter how much weight i lose it ain't gonna change.

    Neither my sister nor I look in the least 'manly'. Stop dwelling on what some stupid 'ex' said and do the activities YOU want to do....you're doing this for you not for him!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    No exercise can change your genetics. If you want to swim, go swim and if you get big shoulders, well rock them. I love having muscular shoulders because they balance my pear shape.

    i agree

    and I'm guessing that I'm shorter than you OP and also have bigger shoulders than you, purely on the fact that I'm shorter than most women and have bigger shoulders than most women too. 5'1" and 44" shoulder circumference. My body fat percentage is in the healthy range and I have muscle definition in my arms and shoulders, so it's not from fat.

    I :heart: my big shoulders and big rib cage.

    Seriously, you can't change your genetics, and if a man feels he should be stronger than his female partner, then it's on him to get in the gym and make it so (he has the testosterone advantage, so it's not an unrealistic goal for him, unless he's dating a women's powerlifting champion or something), it's quite pathetic for him to get all insecure and expect you to get weaker on his behalf. Tell him to grow a pair, basically. You be as strong as you want to be, and seriously there are some amazing looking women who have big shoulders, and there have been a lot of times where it was fashionable for women to wear shoulder pads under their clothes to make their shoulders look bigger. when I was younger a lot of people commented that my shoulders were good because I wouldn't need to wear shoulder pads on jackets, etc. I know fashions change, but the point is that most people don't think that wide shoulders are unattractive on women.

    As for people talking about you in a bad way in the office - this isn't because of how you look, it's because some people always have to find something to criticise in others and gossip about. If it wasn't your shoulders, they'd find something else about you to attack instead, because that's a character flaw in them. You mustn't change yourself, especially don't try to make yourself weaker or avoid getting as strong as you want to be, to please petty minded, immature people who have nothing better to do with their lives than gossip about others.....
  • cmeiron
    cmeiron Posts: 1,599 Member
    Why is it that you equate strength and visible muscles with "manliness"? Women can be strong and muscular too - it doesn't make them any less of a woman. Don't let your desire to be fit, healthy and strong - or your desire to participate in a sport you enjoy - be stymied by something your @rse of an ex said.

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