Exercise for woman with naturally big shoulders?

0OneTwo3

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

neandermagnon

Why is it that you equate strength and visible muscles with "manliness"? Women can be strong and muscular too - it doesn't make them any less of a woman. Don't let your desire to be fit, healthy and strong - or your desire to participate in a sport you enjoy - be stymied by something your @rse of an ex said.

^^^ all of this

TaurusV

No exercise can change your genetics. If you want to swim, go swim and if you get big shoulders, well rock them. I love having muscular shoulders because they balance my pear shape.

i agree

and I'm guessing that I'm shorter than you OP and also have bigger shoulders than you, purely on the fact that I'm shorter than most women and have bigger shoulders than most women too. 5'1" and 44" shoulder circumference. My body fat percentage is in the healthy range and I have muscle definition in my arms and shoulders, so it's not from fat.

I my big shoulders and big rib cage.

Seriously, you can't change your genetics, and if a man feels he should be stronger than his female partner, then it's on him to get in the gym and make it so (he has the testosterone advantage, so it's not an unrealistic goal for him, unless he's dating a women's powerlifting champion or something), it's quite pathetic for him to get all insecure and expect you to get weaker on his behalf. Tell him to grow a pair, basically. You be as strong as you want to be, and seriously there are some amazing looking women who have big shoulders, and there have been a lot of times where it was fashionable for women to wear shoulder pads under their clothes to make their shoulders look bigger. when I was younger a lot of people commented that my shoulders were good because I wouldn't need to wear shoulder pads on jackets, etc. I know fashions change, but the point is that most people don't think that wide shoulders are unattractive on women.

As for people talking about you in a bad way in the office - this isn't because of how you look, it's because some people always have to find something to criticise in others and gossip about. If it wasn't your shoulders, they'd find something else about you to attack instead, because that's a character flaw in them. You mustn't change yourself, especially don't try to make yourself weaker or avoid getting as strong as you want to be, to please petty minded, immature people who have nothing better to do with their lives than gossip about others.....

Thank you for the support, you are very similar to me, I have 5'2 and 45 shoulder circumference, but I also have big and short arms. I was in this relationship for some years and also my whole family (mom, sister, aunts) thinks women should be ballet thin shoulders long slender feminine and I never fit in my whole life. Maybe I should involve myself with people that appreciate things that I appreciate and value. Thanks for the encouragement!

TaurusV

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

I tried many sports/gym to thicken legs, my legs are those stick thin, specially if I am on the thinner side of the scale. They get toned but not big. It happens since I was a kid and became more disproportionate after teenage:



You are right guys, I think is a family inbred prejudice and wrong companies that makes me think that way. I wont hide I am still afraid of getting bigger shoulders in swimming.

susannamarie

OP, I really wouldn't worry about them becoming excessively large from swimming. If they start getting larger than you would like, cut down.

I do know what it's like to not be 'good enough' for your family. My father has a very large, muscular build (even for a man) and my mother had the slender, waif-like look that your family finds so attractive. I took after my father. I have broad shoulders, and extremely muscular legs. I cannot fit many suits and shirts because I cannot fit them over my shoulders, even when they fit fine around.

My mother had a BMI under 16 (I kid you not) when she was in her late teens and early 20s. She was not anorexic, but just naturally very slight, lean, and small ribcage, slender build. So she has very unrealistic ideas about what people ought to weigh. As a matter of fact, she thinks 115 would be a good weight for me (I am 5' 9" or 5' 10" depending on the day -- I have had my lean mass measured and it is in the mid 130s). I will never look the way she thinks I ought to look, and I had to learn to be okay with that.

I'm currently lifting to build even more muscle ... for martial arts.

I guess my moral here is that you should work hard on emphasizing the good points of the body you have and not wishing for the body of your family. You should also find a man who appreciates it, and not (sorry) a frigging wimp who is threatened by a strong woman.

TaurusV

OP, I really wouldn't worry about them becoming excessively large from swimming. If they start getting larger than you would like, cut down.

I do know what it's like to not be 'good enough' for your family. My father has a very large, muscular build (even for a man) and my mother had the slender, waif-like look that your family finds so attractive. I took after my father. I have broad shoulders, and extremely muscular legs. I cannot fit many suits and shirts because I cannot fit them over my shoulders, even when they fit fine around.

My mother had a BMI under 16 (I kid you not) when she was in her late teens and early 20s. She was not anorexic, but just naturally very slight, lean, and small ribcage, slender build. So she has very unrealistic ideas about what people ought to weigh. As a matter of fact, she thinks 115 would be a good weight for me (I am 5' 9" or 5' 10" depending on the day -- I have had my lean mass measured and it is in the mid 130s). I will never look the way she thinks I ought to look, and I had to learn to be okay with that.

I'm currently lifting to build even more muscle ... for martial arts.

I guess my moral here is that you should work hard on emphasizing the good points of the body you have and not wishing for the body of your family. You should also find a man who appreciates it, and not (sorry) a frigging wimp who is threatened by a strong woman.

Hey, Susannamarie, I think I know exactly like you feel, my mom tried to make me like ballet and those dances till I was 15 and I never liked, she never let my dad give me a bike to run with the boys of the street cause they were mostly males and I should like ballet, like my other sister. But my sister is like thin shoulders and large hips and legs.

When I was 17 I tried to diet to fit in but was the worse time I felt and I still had huge shoulders but with bones, so I gave up on this and started martial arts and bought me a bike What martial arts you are practicing right now. I did aikido for years and kc boxing in the past. Can you believe I didnt keep on the practice because of this guy. You are right, shouldn't let others define who we are. Will try swimming and if I like and feels good, only we should decide, not our past mantras we grew in.

susannamarie

What martial arts you are practicing right now. I did aikido for years and kc boxing in the past. Can you believe I didnt keep on the practice because of this guy. You are right, shouldn't let others define who we are. Will try swimming and if I like and feels good, only we should decide, not our past mantras we grew in.

Oh wow, we are twins I have done Aikido for several years, but just moved and there is no dojo here. I started doing Judo for now.

TaurusV

What martial arts you are practicing right now. I did aikido for years and kc boxing in the past. Can you believe I didnt keep on the practice because of this guy. You are right, shouldn't let others define who we are. Will try swimming and if I like and feels good, only we should decide, not our past mantras we grew in.

Oh wow, we are twins I have done Aikido for several years, but just moved and there is no dojo here. I started doing Judo for now.

Lol. I moved very far right now too and still didnt find a dojo around. I am thinking of joining a Karate one or just keep doing yoga videos at home. I like DDP or Insane too. Aikido is so good for mind and body, I felt like steel made when i practiced. Hope you are liking judo!

0OneTwo3

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

I tried many sports/gym to thicken legs, my legs are those stick thin, specially if I am on the thinner side of the scale. They get toned but not big. It happens since I was a kid and became more disproportionate after teenage:



You are right guys, I think is a family inbred prejudice and wrong companies that makes me think that way. I wont hide I am still afraid of getting bigger shoulders in swimming.

squats and deadlifts. change it up in the 5-15 rep range and keep effort and weights high and your legs will grow. just be patient give it a few months.

edit: you will also need a small caloric surplus.

bcattoes

Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly


image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

This may not be what the OP is talking about though. A couple of my aunts have disproportionately large shoulders. It's not about muscle, it's genetic. One was actually questioned by the police because she fit the description of a bank robbery suspect that turned out to be a man in drag!

OP, if you want to swim, than swim. I doubt 2 days a week will make you much bigger. You might also was to consider doing thing like weighted squats, lunges, dead lifts to build up your lower body and even things out a bit.

TaurusV

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

I tried many sports/gym to thicken legs, my legs are those stick thin, specially if I am on the thinner side of the scale. They get toned but not big. It happens since I was a kid and became more disproportionate after teenage:



You are right guys, I think is a family inbred prejudice and wrong companies that makes me think that way. I wont hide I am still afraid of getting bigger shoulders in swimming.

squats and deadlifts. change it up in the 5-15 rep range and keep effort and weights high and your legs will grow. just be patient give it a few months.

edit: you will also need a small caloric surplus.

Surplus? I thought to lose fat and grow muscle, I should be in deficit for the substitution (to burn fat and improve toning)? I am trying to improve my abs, so I was doing a small minus. Maybe after I replace almost all the lower belly fat with muscle, I can change to a small surplus to focus on the legs?

Thanks, I am trying doing lots of squats, lunges and abdominal workouts (started doing Insane and DDP yoga recently). How many sequences you recommend for squats and lunges if I do around 10 reps?

TaurusV

Awful ....just awful ....someone should tell her she look manly


image by yanicka.hachez, on Flickr

This may not be what the OP is talking about though. A couple of my aunts have disproportionately large shoulders. It's not about muscle, it's genetic. One was actually questioned by the police because she fit the description of a bank robbery suspect that turned out to be a man in drag!

OP, if you want to swim, than swim. I doubt 2 days a week will make you much bigger. You might also was to consider doing thing like weighted squats, lunges, dead lifts to build up your lower body and even things out a bit.

Thank you. I mean this exactly. I am afraid of building only the shoulder area and look even more disproportionate, but maybe I didn't express it well. If you see my childhood pics, I had those thick arms and shoulders and very thin long non muscular legs. Oh my, lol, you aunt was thought to be a man in drag :O ?! This is exactly what I was afraid of. A friend of mine said I looke like some professional swimmer that was caught on heavy doping and she definitely looks like a man (body and face) and I was kinda worried, I think this woman they posted is beautiful, but I dont know if my genetics would develop my body like that if I was a body builder/fitness model like her.

0OneTwo3

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

I tried many sports/gym to thicken legs, my legs are those stick thin, specially if I am on the thinner side of the scale. They get toned but not big. It happens since I was a kid and became more disproportionate after teenage:



You are right guys, I think is a family inbred prejudice and wrong companies that makes me think that way. I wont hide I am still afraid of getting bigger shoulders in swimming.

squats and deadlifts. change it up in the 5-15 rep range and keep effort and weights high and your legs will grow. just be patient give it a few months.

edit: you will also need a small caloric surplus.

Surplus? I thought to lose fat and grow muscle, I should be in deficit for the substitution (to burn fat and improve toning)? I am trying to improve my abs, so I was doing a small minus. Maybe after I replace almost all the lower belly fat with muscle, I can change to a small surplus to focus on the legs?

Thanks, I am trying doing lots of squats, lunges and abdominal workouts (started doing Insane and DDP yoga recently). How many sequences you recommend for squats and lunges if I do around 10 reps?

sorry i haven't checked back in a few days. You need a surplus to significantly gain mass of any kind and a deficit too loose mass of any kind. so its advised to do one after the other if you try both at the same time you will be treading water. so first build muscle and than loose excess fat. (or the other way around)

a good way to gain a lot of mass in a short time is to mix strength and hypertrophy rep ranges.

say you have two different leg days:

day1 is squats and two of these exercises of your choice :front squats, lunges, leg presses, leg extensions.
day2 is deadlifts( or sumo-deadlifts) and two of these: glute bridges, stiff legged deadlifts, leg curls

first week you do each of these days for 3 sets and 5 reps for the first movement (the squats and deadlifts) and 3 sets of 6-8 reps for the other two.

the next week you do 3 sets and 10-12 reps(adjusting the weight) for each movement.

the week after that is 3sets x 5reps again and so on.

i would also ad one light upperbody-day every week so you don#t develop muscle imbalances.

beepermad

Warning: I read zero responses to your question.

I also have a big ribcage/shoulders, and I was also a competitive swimmer when I was younger. Unless you're eating surplus calories and actively trying to build your shoulders, you aren't going to become "manly." I just started lifting for weight about three months ago, and the added tone to my upper body coupled with my bone structure just kind of adds to an overall athletic appearance. Which I dig...personally...



Me ^

I'm 5'3". Almost.

BrandNewFabulousMe

But mine are big shoulder and arms, the things that grow more in me are them and the legs become thin. Would swimming worsen it? Do you swim regularly?

I guess you are right, is a very sexist world. but I feel kinda bad when I see me and hubby together and realize I have bigger shoulders than him

You feel ok with it? Nobody ever bullied you out of it? I went all my high school without wearing tanks and sleeveless.

I'm very broad shouldered myself... never able to wear tanks or strapless either. i have the same issue as u. it would be better if my hips were bigger to even myself out but I'm not soooo I just embrace these broad shoulders of mine

Holly_Roman_Empire

Uh-oh, another bulking/anti-bulking thread.

Lupercalia

OP, don't worry about swimming a couple of days a week turning your body into that of an elite swimmer. It's just not gonna happen.

I also have broad shoulders, but like some of the other women posting in this thread, I love them! I love looking athletic and strong. My shoulders are broader than my husband's, too.

I agree with the person suggesting you work on building your lower body. But at the same time, don't neglect strengthening your upper body because you're afraid of getting "too big". I highly recommend you find a full body strength building program and follow it--whether it is bodyweight, barbell, dumbbell, whatever. Swim if you love swimming. Get back to martial arts if you can. Just enjoy your body as it is, and improve the parts you want to improve rather than hating things about it that are never going to change, such as your bone structure.

skinnyinnotime

My ex always commented on my shoulders and arms and how if I kept strength training/kept doing martial arts would make me look like a man for example. I am not saying everybody is like this. But this idea that the woman has to be delicate to be beautiful. Many men and women I know still think like this.

Hmm, sounds like your ex was a bit of an A-hole, at least he's an EX!

Please try not to worry about what people say, I have broad shoulders too, can't say it's ever bothered me. Had an ex tell me I had a 'mans' back, told him it was impossible as I wasn't a man...you see there are lots of idiots about, they are to be ignored!

TaurusV

i think you are focusing to much on details OP.

But if you want to change the way you look so bad than there is no reason to give up on healthy activities you enjoy.
Just build up your lower body to change your proportions so the wide shoulders are offset (broad shoulders can actually help women get a feminin hourglass shape.). perceived attractiveness is all about ratios not the measurements of your arms.
but more important than all of that is that you look and feel the way you want to.

I tried many sports/gym to thicken legs, my legs are those stick thin, specially if I am on the thinner side of the scale. They get toned but not big. It happens since I was a kid and became more disproportionate after teenage:



You are right guys, I think is a family inbred prejudice and wrong companies that makes me think that way. I wont hide I am still afraid of getting bigger shoulders in swimming.

squats and deadlifts. change it up in the 5-15 rep range and keep effort and weights high and your legs will grow. just be patient give it a few months.

edit: you will also need a small caloric surplus.

Surplus? I thought to lose fat and grow muscle, I should be in deficit for the substitution (to burn fat and improve toning)? I am trying to improve my abs, so I was doing a small minus. Maybe after I replace almost all the lower belly fat with muscle, I can change to a small surplus to focus on the legs?

Thanks, I am trying doing lots of squats, lunges and abdominal workouts (started doing Insane and DDP yoga recently). How many sequences you recommend for squats and lunges if I do around 10 reps?

sorry i haven't checked back in a few days. You need a surplus to significantly gain mass of any kind and a deficit too loose mass of any kind. so its advised to do one after the other if you try both at the same time you will be treading water. so first build muscle and than loose excess fat. (or the other way around)

a good way to gain a lot of mass in a short time is to mix strength and hypertrophy rep ranges.

say you have two different leg days:

day1 is squats and two of these exercises of your choice :front squats, lunges, leg presses, leg extensions.
day2 is deadlifts( or sumo-deadlifts) and two of these: glute bridges, stiff legged deadlifts, leg curls

first week you do each of these days for 3 sets and 5 reps for the first movement (the squats and deadlifts) and 3 sets of 6-8 reps for the other two.

the next week you do 3 sets and 10-12 reps(adjusting the weight) for each movement.

the week after that is 3sets x 5reps again and so on.

i would also ad one light upperbody-day every week so you don#t develop muscle imbalances.

Thank you so much. I like your series and the mix makes sense. Will try to implement this! Thanks a lot again.