Trying to recover from eating disorder...

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  • maggie16sweetxoxo
    maggie16sweetxoxo Posts: 314 Member
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    I have a bingeing disorder and purged before.
  • Melissa22G
    Melissa22G Posts: 847 Member
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    Unfortunately, I have no medical or even diet advice I can give you with any authority. What I do know is this. I am a 44 year old man. Ever since I was a child I was the fat kid, the husky kid, the big guy, etc... I have lost 25-100 lbs and put it all back on plus extra more times than I can count. Guess what, my life is fantastic. At 18 you are just starting to slip your way into adulthood. Right now you likely have teachers, family, friends and even yourself dropping pressure on you about every subject from every angle. Please forgive my arrogance as I try to offer you a little perspective: Tomorrow morning the sun will rise. I promise. If you are fat, skinny, shaking, steady, nervous, confident, happy or sad the sun will rise. PLEASE, bask in it. Bask in the beauty and uniqueness that is you. Great things and horrible things will happen to you but you will live a life. Your clothing size has nothing to do with who you are. You are not defined solely by your successes and failuers (or ability to spell) but rather you are defined BY YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE on the realities of your life. As the great philosopher Dorrie From Finding Nemo said "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming"

    This, this was really great! Great input and outlook :)
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
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    i have been in recovery several months now, for the 4th time i believe over the past 11 years. i am diagnosed now with ednos restrictive, as i still have my period but am underweight so i cannot be diagnosed with anorexia, i was in hs though when i did lose my period.

    i would say please go see your doctor for a physical, a mental health provider regarding the anxiety attack and the eating disorder, possibly a different provider for the ed who specializes in those, and a nutrionist to help you plan your meals.

    for myself, i upped my cals slowly at a time. i couldn't handle the full feeling and bloating from eating more, when i started eating more right away it triggered relapses for me. i stopped weighing a long time ago because that was a trigger seeing the numbers initially go up.

    i have gone from intially fasting/max intake of the 600/700s to the 800s, 900s, now into the low 1000/1100s. some days i still restrict, some days i feel like i have horrid binges even though the cals are 1500ish for the day, because for me that is a lot of food. i am trying to eat 1000 today, i will have to force myself dinner though.

    i wish you the best of luck and feel free to add me if you'd like. but like i said, i added a little at a time, and was adding 50-100 cals at a time. if you can handle eating more at once without being triggered go for it.

    eda (eating disorders annonymous) is also awesome. they have in person meetings, online chat meetings and phone meetings. unfortunately there is not one near me for in person meetings so i do a weekly phone meeting. the support is amazing and i think they have helped save my life. in college i did go to counseling and receive services for my recovery but this time as my funds are limited and i cannot afford $50 sessions for a nutritionist and therapist, i am doing it on my own.

    best of luck and i hope you can get your health back before it is too late.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
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    forgot to add i also used to have panic attacks and frequent black outs when i was restricting severely. determined that my heart rate was low, skipping beats, and i had a severe electrolyte deficiency. not sure if this is the same for you but i thought i would mention it. adding salt to my food and having powerade zero (still afraid of liquid calories and working on that as my recovery) has helped me since then.

    regarding the not having a medical card, any low income sliding scale clinics you can go to? do you live in the us, since they just passed the health care act everyone has to enroll in healthcare and if you do live in the states then when your card is in effect get your behind to a specialist. in the meantime take multi vitamins, continue with your small meals and snacks, and make sure you get those electrolytes in.
  • jess1992uga
    jess1992uga Posts: 603 Member
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    I am in recovery as well and you definitely need a nutritionist and a therapist.. Honestly, with this 'attack' have you thought about inpatient/residential treatment. I have been to both and it great and can really help. You are so young and trust me.you want to get over this now. I also write my own recovery blog if you want to read
    http://freedomhunger.blogspot.com
    Message me if any questions
  • KaraAlste
    KaraAlste Posts: 168 Member
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    Sounds like you have your mom's support, it's important to cooperate w/people who love you. Since you want to get healthy, you are in a great mindset! Being healthy is beauty, they go hand in hand. People enjoy being around energetic young ladies. Good luck on reaching your goals and feel free to join the gaining weight group. :happy:
  • VBnotbitter
    VBnotbitter Posts: 820 Member
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    Lots of good advice but as lots have said you do need medical advice. I see you are in Queensland - there must be a GP nearby who bulk bills, Medicare will definitely cover you for ED recovery
  • mhpritt4
    mhpritt4 Posts: 5 Member
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    I am in in Millersburg, Ohio. I'm going to see if there is any way to get into a doctor as soon as I can.

    Thank you again to everyone who has taken time to try to help as much as possible. And to those recovering just like me, I wish you all the best and then some. We'll all be fine. :)
  • VBnotbitter
    VBnotbitter Posts: 820 Member
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    Oops sorry opened wrong profile! Good luck and hope it works out for you
  • __freckles__
    __freckles__ Posts: 1,238 Member
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    Unfortunately, I have no medical or even diet advice I can give you with any authority. What I do know is this. I am a 44 year old man. Ever since I was a child I was the fat kid, the husky kid, the big guy, etc... I have lost 25-100 lbs and put it all back on plus extra more times than I can count. Guess what, my life is fantastic. At 18 you are just starting to slip your way into adulthood. Right now you likely have teachers, family, friends and even yourself dropping pressure on you about every subject from every angle. Please forgive my arrogance as I try to offer you a little perspective: Tomorrow morning the sun will rise. I promise. If you are fat, skinny, shaking, steady, nervous, confident, happy or sad the sun will rise. PLEASE, bask in it. Bask in the beauty and uniqueness that is you. Great things and horrible things will happen to you but you will live a life. Your clothing size has nothing to do with who you are. You are not defined solely by your successes and failuers (or ability to spell) but rather you are defined BY YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE on the realities of your life. As the great philosopher Dorrie From Finding Nemo said "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming"

    You are one wise fellow. Thank you for this.
  • faithsimmons526
    faithsimmons526 Posts: 162 Member
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    Unfortunately, I have no medical or even diet advice I can give you with any authority. What I do know is this. I am a 44 year old man. Ever since I was a child I was the fat kid, the husky kid, the big guy, etc... I have lost 25-100 lbs and put it all back on plus extra more times than I can count. Guess what, my life is fantastic. At 18 you are just starting to slip your way into adulthood. Right now you likely have teachers, family, friends and even yourself dropping pressure on you about every subject from every angle. Please forgive my arrogance as I try to offer you a little perspective: Tomorrow morning the sun will rise. I promise. If you are fat, skinny, shaking, steady, nervous, confident, happy or sad the sun will rise. PLEASE, bask in it. Bask in the beauty and uniqueness that is you. Great things and horrible things will happen to you but you will live a life. Your clothing size has nothing to do with who you are. You are not defined solely by your successes and failuers (or ability to spell) but rather you are defined BY YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE on the realities of your life. As the great philosopher Dorrie From Finding Nemo said "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming"

    That is so f***ing beautiful. Thank you.

    OP, I have no experience with your situation or nutritional needs, but would like to say that you seem to have a winning spirit and my thoughts will be with you as you achieve the successes that await you. I know you can do it.
  • xapril77x
    xapril77x Posts: 248 Member
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    Do u get chest pains or palpitations? I had the same thing happen to me not long ago... It started in Nov of 2012... I had gone a long time w/o water (like years) & wasn't eating anything good 4 me at all... Just an occasional pastry & tons of soda... I was really sedentary but 1 day my heart sped up so fast I couldn't stand, because if I tried 2 stand it would go WAY up over 200 bpm... I stayed in bed for days & it would drop down to about 100 - 120 but as soon as I tried 2 stand up again it would shoot up over 200... So, I just layed there & didn't have a way 2 get food or water or even my favorite (soda)... After about a week - 10 days I had dropped from about 130 -135 to 105... but even at 105 I had a lil tummy... I looked pregnant... The cardiologist admitted me & I was there for a week while they ran tests & gave me IV fluids... My ECG showed tachycardia... That was in Dec... Since then I gained 55 lbs & now have lost 21 of those... My heart still acts up & I still have the chest pains & palpitations almost daily but my HR & BP seem 2 have gotten way better... I just have 2 be careful about exercising too much... My Dr thinks after years of my bad eating habits & not drinking water that it was severe dehydration & that my heart muscle is weak & needs 2 be built back up... U really should see ur Dr, a nutritionist, & a therapist... Don't let it get so bad that u end up with permanent damage...
  • goodnamegone
    goodnamegone Posts: 237
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    [/quote]
    Thank you. My mom was with me through it and she is the one that said that it was an anxiety attack. She said I was fine. Heh. I don't have a medical card and we don't have the money to go to a doctor right now. It's just a difficult situation. :(
    [/quote]

    You're not fine and it's possible that your mother might not be the best source of validation for you. If it's not possible to go to a doctor maybe a 12 step program for eating would help or another support group that doesn't cost money would be good for you. What you do or do not do with the advice given here is up to you.
  • pauljsaunders
    pauljsaunders Posts: 79
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    I feel for you having to go through this situation. Your current issue looks as if it stems from being bullied and this has manifested as a personal dislike of yourself which is now deeply rooted in your subconscious. I work in a mental health ward in the UK and see many people of all ages take such drastic actions to lose weight and this action is solely to please others. Do not take this next comment too harshly, but you appear to have an eating disorder and I feel you should seek medical support and possible consideration for a referral to a specialist. Looking at a chart we use on the ward you come into the under weight where we would refer you to a specialist for your personal safety. Things can be turned around slowly.. You will become weaker and drained of energy, your immune system will have to work harder over time, and this will affect your nervous system ( anxiety levels will increase ). I cant tell you what to do but please consider seeing your doctor….
  • LoveLea3
    LoveLea3 Posts: 24
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    :flowerforyou:
  • Nachise
    Nachise Posts: 395 Member
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    "Short panting breathing causes extra oxygen in rise in your body(numbness)hyperventilating... you had a panic attack....there is anxiety and panic sets in and takes over...This my friend sucks.I get it from drinking heavy the next day is a nightmare...There is a chemical in your brain getting released that is fight or flight response and too much of it does that...Dont think about eating just eat and exercise then you will be healthy it's really not that difficult just gotta stop over thinking and do more to get better...sorry that you did this to yourself not sure if anything I said helps in anyway."

    Actually, the chemical is adrenaline, and it is excreted by the adrenal gland, which is in your abdomen. There are other things that could cause those symptoms. Lack of nutrition can have cardiac and neurological implications as well. When your body is malnourished, all other systems will either go into mayday mode or shut down. Get a thorough medical evaluation.

    You may be able to get health insurance now, and I would advise seeing a good GP and/or a nutritionist. The information about Eating Disorders Anonymous is spot on.http://www.eatingdisordersanonymous.org

    Nothing is as helpful as getting help from someone who has walked the same path as you. Not only do you benefit, but the person helping you benefits as well. That is a total win-win. Good luck, and many Blessings.
  • littlebudgie
    littlebudgie Posts: 279 Member
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    Here is a website for finding a psychologist near you: http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/?tr=Hdr_Brand

    Some of them work on a sliding scale, and hopefully you will be able to find one who works for you there.
  • upscalelifedownscalebutt
    upscalelifedownscalebutt Posts: 90 Member
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    Great advice here, so I will just leave hugs and love.

    Best wishes! Add me as a friend if you want.
  • Coley1980red
    Coley1980red Posts: 3 Member
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    Unfortunately, I have no medical or even diet advice I can give you with any authority. What I do know is this. I am a 44 year old man. Ever since I was a child I was the fat kid, the husky kid, the big guy, etc... I have lost 25-100 lbs and put it all back on plus extra more times than I can count. Guess what, my life is fantastic. At 18 you are just starting to slip your way into adulthood. Right now you likely have teachers, family, friends and even yourself dropping pressure on you about every subject from every angle. Please forgive my arrogance as I try to offer you a little perspective: Tomorrow morning the sun will rise. I promise. If you are fat, skinny, shaking, steady, nervous, confident, happy or sad the sun will rise. PLEASE, bask in it. Bask in the beauty and uniqueness that is you. Great things and horrible things will happen to you but you will live a life. Your clothing size has nothing to do with who you are. You are not defined solely by your successes and failuers (or ability to spell) but rather you are defined BY YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE on the realities of your life. As the great philosopher Dorrie From Finding Nemo said "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming"

    ^ this is stellar advice. Even though it's hard to see the forest through the tress right now.
  • tbetts23
    tbetts23 Posts: 303 Member
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    Unfortunately, I have no medical or even diet advice I can give you with any authority. What I do know is this. I am a 44 year old man. Ever since I was a child I was the fat kid, the husky kid, the big guy, etc... I have lost 25-100 lbs and put it all back on plus extra more times than I can count. Guess what, my life is fantastic. At 18 you are just starting to slip your way into adulthood. Right now you likely have teachers, family, friends and even yourself dropping pressure on you about every subject from every angle. Please forgive my arrogance as I try to offer you a little perspective: Tomorrow morning the sun will rise. I promise. If you are fat, skinny, shaking, steady, nervous, confident, happy or sad the sun will rise. PLEASE, bask in it. Bask in the beauty and uniqueness that is you. Great things and horrible things will happen to you but you will live a life. Your clothing size has nothing to do with who you are. You are not defined solely by your successes and failuers (or ability to spell) but rather you are defined BY YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE on the realities of your life. As the great philosopher Dorrie From Finding Nemo said "Jst keep swimming, Just keep swimming"
    Perfect

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