When does that negative voice inside our heads shut up?

I have been at this for a while now. I have been running for about a year now on and off- but 6-9 months regularly. I have lost some weight and have had my share of successes- but for some reason I cant shake that little negative voice saying to quit or I am not good enough- or just whatever. I have many positive thoughts and I realize everyone has those thoughts...

It just sucks because the negative thoughts are so hard to shake off.
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Replies

  • rayn3z
    rayn3z Posts: 19 Member
    It's an every day challenge, the fact that we've grown up our entire lives with that negative voice as a constant reality, is so hard to overcome and unlearn in just a few years. It will take a long time before the new reality sets in and becomes a new default. After all it's a whole learning process, don't worry if you fall, just don't make excuses and don't make a habit out of it, just get up and keep going, coz life keeps going anyway.

    Be strong and wake up every day and use the first 5 minutes to look at urself in the mirror and tell yourself that you're worthy of all good things and you are NUMBER 1!!! and remind yourself of your daily goals seriously it will do wonders!

    Keep at it girl!!! the negative voice is a good thing, it's a reminder of why we shouldn't fail..

    now if i can only follow my own advice hehe
  • Kita328
    Kita328 Posts: 370 Member
    THANKS. SOME DAYS ITS JUST HARDER THAN OTHERS. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE PRETTY GOOD POSITIVE ATTITUDE AND I HAVE NO DESIRE TO GIVE UP- BUT SOMEHOW THOSE THOUGHTS STILL CROSS MY MIND BEFORE/ DURING WORKOUTS. I JUST AM JUST WONDER WHAT IT IS I CAN DO TO GET MY HEAD AND HEART IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME!

    IT IS GOOD TO KNOW THAT SOMEONE ELSE UNDERSTANDS THESE FEELINGS... ITS HARD TO EXPRESS THEM WITHOUT BEING A DOWNER SO I NORMALLY DONT SAY ANY THING...
  • SophK90
    SophK90 Posts: 56
    I think everyone has the odd 'fat day' i felt like that yesterday regardless of what i put on.
    I think when you have been unsatisfied for so long your always that bit 'weaker' in how you see yourself. I am trying to work through it - but i have been miserable with my size for so long now, sometimes when i lose weight I'm thinking, the scales are dodgy.

    I had a friend with an eating disorder a few years ago, and she was always told to look in the mirror for that bit longer and appreciate the days that you feel good, it is supposed to slowly change your mind set
  • Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.
  • kiwigal41
    kiwigal41 Posts: 1,059
    with me??.....never
  • Tiff050709
    Tiff050709 Posts: 497 Member
    For some people, like myself, I don't think that voice will ever fully go away. I think it's getting better though. I just am trying my best, that's all anyone can do, and not be so hard on myself.
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    Replace it with positive thoughts. As soon as you hear the voice nagging you, forcefully think of prepared phrases.

    You may find this article useful: http://www.wimble.com/irl2/he-said-she-said/
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    For me, I don't think it ever will. It's just moved to the back row instead of being right up front so I can't hear it as loudly.
  • magdalen13
    magdalen13 Posts: 62 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    ^^ yup, I treat it like an unwanted acquaintance. Just say "Sorry, I'm busy, I have to go" and ignore it, leave it behind :) Maybe visualizing doing something like that will help.
  • lebaker310
    lebaker310 Posts: 164 Member
    Some people have the ability to ignore it. I know I have a harder time, but I've been finding it easier to switch to positive thoughts. I try to remind myself how silly I'm being. Every time i start to think about something negative or put myself down, I like to go over things that remind me of my success so far. When i dont see immediate results, I try to remember that I don't need to change today or tomorrow, I have the rest of my life to continue to progress and become a better me. Being so positive doesnt give me time to be Negative Anymore. Weightlifting has boosted my confidence tremendously. I don't feel very accomplished after running a mile or anything, but after I finish A challenging set I feel very proud and strong and beautiful.


    Also I've started making it a point to compliment others on a daily basis. Makes me feel good to make others feel good.
  • jen_zz
    jen_zz Posts: 1,011 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    oh my, slurping nutella with a straw on page 2 !:laugh:
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    Answer: When you tell it to shut up. I have chosen to focus on the positive and even when I have a bad day I move on and look forward to a better one tomorrow.
  • magdalen13
    magdalen13 Posts: 62 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    oh my, slurping nutella with a straw on page 2 !:laugh:

    YES haha... I love the Oatmeal, his ones about dogs have gotten me laughing so hard I was crying.
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    The Oatmeal is awesome. He should sell a running shirt with the Blerch on the back of it.
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
    I kind of like that little voice in my head. It's like an extra person I can prove wrong.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    For me, I don't think it ever will. It's just moved to the back row instead of being right up front so I can't hear it as loudly.

    ^^ This...
    except many days, it pushes to the front, and then I need to find ways to put it back into its place.
  • Kita328
    Kita328 Posts: 370 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    The Oatmeal is awesome. He should sell a running shirt with the Blerch on the back of it.

    I loved that! Thanks that totally put me in a good mood! I would get the Blerch shirt if they had it
  • anewlife1980
    anewlife1980 Posts: 225 Member
    I think it stops when you "get it", when you stop considering this a "diet" & consider it a life long journey. I got to that place by the 6wk mark, I am now in week 35. I haven't once had the feeling of "I should just stop" or wanting to give up once I reached that point, before then? Absolutely. But this stopped feeling like a chore for me after about 4-5wks, things became a natural process, esp prepping my food, weighing it out etc it just became second nature. It felt so much apart of my life that there was no reason for the negative feelings to come up on a daily basis. The part I struggle with is looking in the mirror & often still seeing the "old me", the one that was just shy of 300lbs even though I've lost 84lbs but that comes & goes & its getting better. I find the mirror isn't a good comparison, its better to have before & after pics & put together side by side comparisons regularly, doing my measurements helps too. Good luck!
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    toughen up.
    go kick some butt,
    u should feel proud and happy.
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
    From what I see you look GAWGEOUS! Just LOVELY!

    I had that negative voice kicking in this morning, mine is usually linked with 'you're not smart enough.'

    Then I had some coworkers tell me some jokes and had a good laugh. Had some coffeee and perked up.

    It happens to the best of us! :tongue:
  • thepetiterunner
    thepetiterunner Posts: 1,238 Member
    Have you read, The Oatmeal - Why I run? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running - It's a cute little comic that talks exactly about this. The voice you hear, the negativity, it will never really go away. It's up to you to make it shut up. And every time it tries to talk to you, just tell it to go away. Don't listen to it.

    The Oatmeal is awesome. He should sell a running shirt with the Blerch on the back of it.

    This is the best running comic I've ever seen and ALL of it is true.

    And he does sell the Blerch shirt, actually :) I have one. http://theoatmeal.com/blog/blerch_shirts
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
    It pretty much shuts up when I focus on something else. Fortunately, there are a lot of other things to do. I'm not thinking negative thoughts when I'm exercising, knitting, working, or painting. The worst time for me is 3 am, when I wake up and I don't want to wake my husband up by getting out of bed to do something other than lay there and think.
  • You know...I still have them. I have been a recent positive thinker, happy self-esteem person since July. And I still have my moments. But I just beat them down and make sure that the positivie person I am now...beats the negative nancy into submission. LOL!! We all have our days, we all have our downfalls. It is how we combat them that matters. You can fall, just don't let it make you fail.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    It doesn't. My positive voice that says "OMG girl, you looked hot in them jeans last night!" just talks over it. :-D
  • ToFatT0B3S1ck
    ToFatT0B3S1ck Posts: 194 Member
    Honestly, for me it NEVER stopped. I am always telling myself to give up and that it isn't worth it anymore. I find excuses to say *kitten* it and over eat. I find excuses to say *kitten* it and skip my work outs. All from time to time. In the end, I continue doing what I am doing and so far have always found my way to get back on track. I made a goal in 2011 and I intend on achieving that goal. 25 pounds left to go.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    It never shuts up. On every run the voice tells me how much easier it would be to just stop, that it would be so much nicer sat on the couch with re-runs of Top Gear and a box of cookies.

    I drown it out with Rage Against the Machine and running faster/lifting more.
  • Timmmy40
    Timmmy40 Posts: 152 Member
    Never Shuts Up!! I tell him to shut up. I am doing it and it usually goes away. Just have to fight the daily voice.
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
    On almost every long run, I'm trying to talk myself OUT of going the whole distance for the first 2-3 miles. And, I've had plenty of running "success". Winning my age group in local 5k races...I just placed 4th in my age group at a half marathon (out of 300 ladies m age)....was in the top 9% of all half marathon finishers. I don't know that the voice ever goes away, but eventually it just gets drowned out by the voice that tells you how awesome running is!!
  • jpolinisse
    jpolinisse Posts: 149 Member
    After about 15 minutes, and when the right song comes up on my play list.
  • azzkikin
    azzkikin Posts: 458 Member
    When you stop caring. And that goes for anything not just fitness.