Kill me now. Why is this so hard?

khearron26

Don't panic! Don't be afraid. You absolutely have to take this one day at a time. Even if you don't get on the scale for one whole week. Focus on your eating and your exercising habits each day. Think about your decisions in the moment. Don't let the numbers on the scale scare you. Like others have said before, there could be many reasons for the weight change you are seeing, none of which reflect poorly on you. Take this one day at a time. Listen to your body and challenge it. But don't let those numbers control you!!!

pcastagner

I haven't seen this mentioned yet and I think it has been absolutely essential for my body transformation:

When you start exercising, don't simultaneously cut your calories. Eat to stay THE SAME WEIGHT until exercise becomes a habit that restores your spirits instead of a drain, Spend a month or even two, or as long as it takes. Spend a year if you have to.

The day you wake up already looking forward to the gym - that's the day you should start reducing calories. It took me about two months.

laurabrown66

Just started on MFP and I look at the caloris I should be eating and the other goals such as carbs, sugar and protein and I can't figure out how to get the calories withour going over on the other things. I am diabetic and the carbs and sugars are big things for me. Should I be less concerned about the protein?

StheK

What motivates me is that this time will pass anyway- a week from now I will either be healthier than I am now, or less healthy. A year from now, even more so. Whether my scale shows progress tomorrow or the next day is not nearly as important as the fact that a year from now, 10 years from now, I will have spent all this time moving one direction or another- and it's the daily decisions that add up to get me there.

Coincidentally, thinking this way has helped me lose almost 100 lbs and has helped me cope with days where my weight went up, weeks where it didn't seem to move at all, and months where it moved so slowly I thought I must be plateaud.

I also don't push myself quite as hard as it sounds like you do. I do moderate exercise and I don't restrict myself from any particular foods, although I am scrupulously honest about logging, even when it's not pretty. If I were working super hard at it all time, pushing myself to do things I don't enjoy every day, I would be very frustrated that all of that effort wasn't paying off immediately. It's too much to ask of yourself. Relax a little, be honest with your logging, and find a way to motivate yourself that doesn't require instant gratification, because that's a recipe for disaster. Good luck!

mikeschratz

If not seeing daily progress is enough to stop your motivation, you may want to consider working on emotional and mental fitness as well as physical fitness. You're being hard on yourself and setting unrealistic expectations, which will ensure you never succeed.

Remember that this is a lifestyle change, not a quick fix, and that it has to be total-- mind AND body.

^^^^^ This^^^^^

Akimajuktuq

No, it's not hard. But as long as you have a deadline in mind and insist on treating weight loss as a race, it's going to be a fail. Find a lifestyle that you enjoy and can maintain forever, then stick with it. For me, what I eat matters, other people say it doesn't. Figure out what works for you. You do need to eat at a deficit but unlike what so many people here believe, under-eating will actually sabotage your progress.

If you base your progress only by the number on the scale, no you will not stay "motivated". It's up to you to choose to commit to change or not. Nothing anyone says here can motivate you. You expect to see a loss every single week (and 2 pounds!?), well you will be disappointed repeatedly, because weight loss is NOT linear and the more you lose the slower it gets. I've been here for 15 months. I now lose (on average-not every week) only half a pound per week. Should I "give up"? Not. I'm focused on health and I eat the way I will eat for the rest of my life, so I just keep on keeping on. It's not hard, but it does take commitment. My commitment is to my HEALTH first and foremost. The weight loss is nice but not my primary focus.

chirosche

I know I shouldn't weigh so frequently but I need to see even 0.02 of a loss to keep motivated.

Patience, or Fail.

Easier said than done. An old thin photo of me isn't enough to keep me motivated, so what else can I try? Not so handy with a tape measure so I'm using an old pair of jeans I'd like to get back into.

Also, still doesn't solve where I'm going wrong. I lost weight easier when I didn't exercise. How does that work?

All of us want this unwanted weight to get off of us right now, immediately. We'd like to dismiss it into the waste basket like a balled up candy wrapper. You're not doing anything wrong. The problem that "develops" over time from yo-yo dieting is insidious. Each time, you lose and gain it back NEW fat cells are born. That is why you are heavier each time. So imagine, if you keep on losing and gaining, you'll eventually be bigger than you ever imagined. That is a scary thought. Also, metabolic damage can occur constantly going on diets, which may slow down you're ability to lose as quickly as you did before. So, now you have to make some mental adjustments regarding your approach and your discipline. This is not temporary. Whatever you have to do to get it off, you'll have to do to maintain. You just will be able to increase your calories to maintenance. You'll have to forgive yourself and give your body some mercy and allow it to readjust metabolically. I repeatedly hear be patient in this thread. And that is going to be key, otherwise, it sounds like you are stressing about it, which will also cause you to hold on to fat. Cortisol (the stress hormone) is a hidden enemy to losing fat. Relax, go with the flow, keep doing all the right things, which is sounds like you're doing, and it will come off, if you just don't have unrealistic expectations of how fast it's "supposed" to come off. Nurture your body, your mind and your spirit. Your goal is within reach. It can't be all right now. If you're going to be all or nothing, you'll find yourself recycling the yo-yo diet yet again.

gypsyrose64

It's taken me a YEAR to lose 34 lbs! There has been entire months were I bounce up/down and end up back where I started.

I weigh every morning, after I pee, before I dress. I log it on an android app called "Libra", which gives you a trend line after a while. It helps to keep things in perspective.

What I've noticed (for me) is carbs/salt/sugar affect my weight dramatically. I will blow up as much as 6 lbs after eating pizza or chinese food! I can weigh and then go get ready for work, weigh again before leaving the house and have gained 3 lbs. It fluctuates constantly. I only weigh once in the morning now and don't let it ruin my day.

I would suggest you get familiar with your tape measure. I had one month where I gained a pound, but lost 3+ inches off my core! I would suggest taking pictures as you go... it really helps me.

You cannot look at this like a pass/fail test. It's not an event you trained for and then face-planted before the finish line. The older we get, the harder it is to make our bodies change, but not impossible. You have to approach this as a decision towards health and nutrition, that just might yield weight loss. The more you stress out over it, the more your body works against you.

I would say you're doing pretty darn good!

alexsheena

I saw this on tumblr and it really changed my outlook.

'How do I stay motivated?'
'This is probably isn't going to be what you want so I apologise BUT
**** motivation. Motivation is an unreliable little ****. It comes and goes and it's not what you want to rely on to get you through really tough workouts. Instead of worrying about how to stay motivated, work on staying disciplined, on staying dedicated. There are so many days when I have zero motivation to do anything and if motivation was all I had I would get **** all done.
Don't even question doing whatever your workout is. Don't even start to think "uhh I'm not in the mood". You just gotta ****ing do it. Make a routine. Schedule your workouts in and then when the time comes just get up and do it. It's hard. It really is. But you're a badass mother****er and you can do it.
Discipline > motivation'


I think this works for any kind of motivation. Your dedication is what will keep you going in the end. Slow and steady wins the race and what's the point in not sticking with it, going back to doing nothing is going to change nothing, stop wanting a quick fix, there isn't one.

JamieM8168

Just keep doing what you're doing. Don't be discouraged by a week or two of low results. You can fluctuate by 5 lbs or more from day to day

Whoa_OItsMagic

I havent read all the replies but know this, there will never be anyone who can get you motivated. If you can't get yourself motivated and on track, than no one will. You have to want this for yourself enough.

awkwarddifferent

I can completely understand you on this topic. It really is difficult.. but you MUST hang in there! Usually what works for me is looking at clothes online, thinking about how i desperately want to be able to buy my old size i used to wear. Why don't you spend some time looking for your motivation?

Have you tried looking at workout DVD's like the 30 day Shred? I finished day 1 about 3 hours ago and i can still feel the burn! Supposedly this workout helps tone and tighten the body; which drops the inches of the body!!

Give it a shot!! Trust me; we can make it through this.. we just need to think about the result!!!!
Add me and we can continue to motivate each other if it helps. I'm always happy to help! )

I_Will_End_You

The day you wake up already looking forward to the gym - that's the day you should start reducing calories. It took me about two months.

If I waited for the time I looked forward to working out.... I'd still be waiting. :indifferent:

trogalicious

So here. Here's a huge wall of text that might help. I put this together a while back. It seems to have helped some folks. It worked for me.

1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
2. Make sure you eat enough.
3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
12. don't set time restrictions.
13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
14 BE PATIENT.
15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
16. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

pretty much that.

...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

the typical MFP users does this:
1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
9. Argument ensues about who is right.

Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/
Take the tips, links, and info above and make the cart more manageable to stay on.

pcastagner

The day you wake up already looking forward to the gym - that's the day you should start reducing calories. It took me about two months.

If I waited for the time I looked forward to working out.... I'd still be waiting. :indifferent:

You're doing it wrong!

Serah87

So here. Here's a huge wall of text that might help. I put this together a while back. It seems to have helped some folks. It worked for me.

1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
2. Make sure you eat enough.
3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
12. don't set time restrictions.
13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
14 BE PATIENT.
15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
16. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

pretty much that.

...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

the typical MFP users does this:
1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
9. Argument ensues about who is right.

Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/
Take the tips, links, and info above and make the cart more manageable to stay on.

^^^^THIS!!!!! :flowerforyou:

theopenforum

I realize it can be frustrating, but you really need to put the scale away. First of all, there are a TON of reasons why you could be up 3.5 lbs- if you just ate, you haven't set foot in a gym in years so your muscles are retaining water, time of the month, you haven't gone to the bathroom, you ate a salty meal.... the list goes on. Second, expecting a loss (even .02 lbs) every time you set foot on the scale is going to set you up for failure. Either weigh once a week and look at the trends or just measure instead. You cannot use weight as your motivation because it can and will fluctuate. If I had given up every time I didn't lose some weight, I'd have quite years ago.

4 lbs in 2 weeks IS good. You're losing at a consistent and healthy rate. You said yourself you were able to lose weight quickly before and you put it back on. Clearly, that old way isn't working. Why not give this a few months time and see how it goes?

this lady is good ^_^
yep my sentiments exactly; when I first started out I stopped weighing in all the time. It is far too depressing as your beginning to find out. There can be a multitude of reasons for the weight. Glycogen stores from the muscle activity as the commenter above alluded to, salt, even the time you weighed yourself can be a difference of 4 lbs easy. My best advice will be to just breathe and have patience it will come. The weight did not come overnight it will take time. Just keep at it

Yell if ya need me

Tof