Ouch...but I asked for it!

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  • AmykinsCatfood
    AmykinsCatfood Posts: 599 Member
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    The filters that people once used to avoid hurting other peoples feelings/offending them are becoming a thing of the past. Even the FCC is becoming more lax about what they will allow on TV. They don't say these things intentionally most of the time- just don't think about it before it comes out of their mouth.

    In one way it's refreshing- people aren't constantly monitoring what they say or feel in order to avoid hurting someone else's feelings, but in another it can be quite hurtful if you're on the receiving end of a comment like that. Often they didn't even mean to say it and probably feel like a *kitten*, but It happens, and it sucks. Just use it as motivation. I had a group of teenagers drive past me while I was on my bike and yell cruel things at me. I then went on the most kickass bikeride of my life, and 40lbs later, I'm still losing.
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    Over the years I've had several things like that said to me and I remember the hurt. I finally realized that what others say about me does not have to define me. I evalutated myself and began to appreciate the things I liked or loved about myself and then started to work on the things I didn't like so much. I became a woman that I am now proud of and nothing anyone says or does can take that away from me. That's what I recommend to anyone who is affected by the words or actions of others. Make lists of the things you like and dislike about yourself. You have control over those things. You have power over them. When you empower yourself, you remove the power from others to have that kind of affect on you.
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
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    I don't think you were fishing for a compliment (hope not!), but I do think that self-deprecating humor involves deprecating ;) I actually think what he said sounds joking and exactly in line with where you were going.

    What are some responses you think he should have said? They probably sound too serious when someone is kidding, imho. Or he would have to compliment you instead, yes, and then you'd feel silly because you were joking, not asking for a compliment!

    If he'd taken you seriously instead of joking, I think it would be more awkward. Maybe he should have just laughed, but you know guys like to have a comeback :D I can't think of a good, clever one he should have said, lol. So he's fine, I think. And you shouldn't joke about something you are serious about! That can get awkward, yes! :)

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