Why do people say that?

Lithuria

I agree with what a lot of people here are saying. It's a mix of jealousy, politeness, and a scewed view of what is really healthy.

I am obviously obese, and at six foot tall it's just absoloutely humongously obvious. But there are many people out there, like yourself, who may not be obese but aren't exactly slim. This has become the "normal" look for people, but truth be told, who doesn't have issues with the way they look in relation to their weight? And we all know what our "healthy" BMI numbers are.

At the end of the day, you know what you weigh and if it's healthy for you or not. Pay no attention, in fact take it as a compliment, you don't have to take their advice too

lauralynette

I get that a lot. Sometimes I know it is people who are threatened by my success because they are struggling themselves, then there are people like my mom who worries I will develop an eating disorder, then there are the people who think that is what they should say because really are they going to say... "yeah I thought you could stand to lose some more" after they just congratulated you on your success.
Take everything with a grain of salt. You and your body know your ideal weight and you don't need to justify yourself to anyone.

Very well said!
My mom is one of those people that when you start loosing weight she will say not to loose anymore a lot of that comes from her insecurities, so now I take it with a grain of salt.

Cytherea

I don't think it is fair to keep painting it as people being jealous. Maybe it is just because they care about you and are concerned!! My friend that said it to me doesn't need to lose any weight (although she'd probably say she does)- even if I lost 100 pounds I STILL would weigh more than her! Obviously she isn't jealous!

And I have thought this about a friend of mine who has lost a lot of weight. It is the case that people who do lose a lot sometimes get obsessed with it and want to lose more, and end up actually losing too much and being too skinny, being UNHEALTHY on the other end of the spectrum. I haven't said it to her, but I absolutely would and would mean every word. She's a tall girl, so she is supposed to weigh more anyways, so trying to weigh what someone who is 5'4 weighs when you are almost 6 ft. is NOT healthy!! Even before I started trying to lose weight I thought this about her and it had NOTHING to do with jealousy at all- it was purely motivated out of concern for her well-being. I was HAPPY for her that she was doing such a good job, not jealous because I wasn't taking care of myself or trying to sabotage her because of it!!

It is easy to say that people are just jealous when they react in a way that you perceive to be negative, but come on, it really isn't necessarily the case. There are a LOT of other motivations for saying or doing anything and to assume that it is because they are such awful people and want to hurt you because you are doing well for yourself just doesn't sit well with me.

KarenBorter

I totally get this ... all the time! This week I weighed myself for the first time in YEARS (because my clothes started getting tight). I was astounded when the scale tipped at 180.5. I began telling people and no one I told believes me. I was talking to my mom and said my mini goal was 160 but I really wanted to get down to 145. She started saying "well you don't want to lose too much weight". I was like, "Mom, please help me don't discourage me!"

I know how my clothes are fitting (poorly atm) and I am uncomfy in them. I don't want to buy size 14 pants and I have been wearing 12's for a few years now. I want to get back into my 10's. If I hear 1 more person say "You can't be 180, there's no way!" I am going to scream LOL

Everyone carries weight differently and unfortunately I gain all over evenly so it's not the noticeable ... except to me of course

good topic!