A friend who might be an alcoholic - I need advice!

Options
2»

Replies

  • Slacker16
    Slacker16 Posts: 1,184 Member
    Options
    I have called her at 11 pm on a weeknight and she has been drunk, I have gone away for the weekend with her and at 11 am she was sipping vodka.
    That feel when you can remember at least one occasion where you were drunk at 11 am on a weekday...

    Joking aside, there's no smoke without fire. If you and two of her friends all think something's going on... chances are that something is going on.

    Problem is you have no way of knowing what is going on, or more precisely how serious it is. Maybe talk to her husband before you stage an intervention?
  • leslisa
    leslisa Posts: 1,350 Member
    Options
    BTW, I would not be friends with most of the posters on this thread.

    That's OK. We like you anyway :)
  • LishieFruit89
    LishieFruit89 Posts: 1,956 Member
    Options
    BTW, I would not be friends with most of the posters on this thread.

    That's fine, I wouldn't want to be your friend either.
  • tedrickp
    tedrickp Posts: 1,229 Member
    Options
    Drinking at 11am on a weekend is not an indicator of alcohol abuse, it is more often an indicator that I am at the cottage or camping.
  • whatshouldieat
    whatshouldieat Posts: 101 Member
    Options
    Got straight to her and be up front about your concerns, express empathy and let her know that she has the support from you to get through these tough times. If her drinking is affecting her home life, financial life, and there are concerns of abuse then she has a problem. Sounds like she can just have one or the take it or leave it attitude. Get her help before her life turns upside down. You may research what alcohol does to the body and give her pamplets to her when you approach her. Also give her areas she can get help she needs.
  • just_Jennie1
    just_Jennie1 Posts: 1,233
    Options
    My mom was an alcoholic and she did a very good job at hiding it. She was a very functional alcoholic and growing up I had absolutely no clue.

    If you feel the need to say something then say it but understand that she might be offended and/or angry and it could put a strain on your relationship.

    As for drinking during the week my husband and I have a bottle of wine every night. Some nights we might have two. I'm a light weight so after two glasses I'm feeling tipsy. I don't get intoxicated every night though.

    I don't see an issue with her having a drink at 11 a.m. when you guys go away for the weekend. I have had mimosa's or a bloody Mary with breakfast. That doesn't make me an alcoholic. I've also drank before noon when on vacation or if my husband and I were out some where and we stopped for an early lunch.

    If she is not functioning, if she is drunk and hung over every day and she isn't taking care of her kids then it's an issue. If when she wakes up in the morning the first thing she does is make a beeline to the refrigerator, pops a cold one and downs it then it's an issue.
  • JeniferEverx3
    JeniferEverx3 Posts: 219 Member
    Options
    There's really not a whole lot you can do. People with addictions can only recieve help when they are ready to accept that they have a problem. The most you can do is say to her I'm worried about you, I know you feel like you're okay, but if you're not please know that I am here for you.

    I have a friend who is an alcoholic. He's hit rock-bottom so many times I'm surprised he's not in China. There is no saving him. Everyone has told him he has a problem and needs help. He bounces from friend's apartment to friend's apartment, he's been in a horrible car accident (he was not the driver but the driver was drunk and so was he, and so was our other friend who WAS also an alcoholic) our other friend pulled him from the burning wreckage and saved his life. That friend has since served his time for DUI's and is now 100% sober - because he wanted to get better, and that accident was his wake up call. Unforunately for this friend, it wasn't enough. He very often gets wasted and posts incredibly embarassing things on social media (I mean you would not believe what I have read AND SEEN) and then deletes them when he sobers up. My boyfriend has even had to punch him in the face and throw him out of his house for being beligerent. You know where he is now? Finally in his very own, completely sh*tty studio apartment... right between 2 bars. All his friends are here for him should he ever ask for help, but until then there's nothing more we can do, as sad as that is it's the truth.

    I wish you the best of luck.

Categories