Feel the love but no passion, or romance

wheird

Bad advice is generous.

TheSlorax

I am glad you find your suggestion of using highly addictive and harmful substances to boost libido so hilarious.

BusyRaeNOTBusty

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

Really? That's the biggest perk? Not a loving partner to share your life with? You guys are awesome.

DMZ_1

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

sex with minimal effort? if my SO put minimal effort into sex I would not be happy or satisfied. at all. it also wouldn't be readily available... no sex is better than bad sex. once again, you guys are real winners.

This is a semantical issue. I think there's confusion as to what effort actually is. The first instance of sex requires the most amount of effort from the male perspective. Outside of the framework of one night stands, you need to approach someone, build some sort of meaningful rapport, go out on some dates, get her in a private setting, continuously escalate physically. After the first few instances of sex, the amount of effort per instance of sex is less because the initial efforts have already been made. I'm not advocating taking sex for granted within the confines of a relationship, but it is much easier to keep someone happy that you've already started with than start over from the beginning.

Also, and a woman would never consider this, there's something called the cumulative effect. That means, for every time that a man's efforts with one female fails, he has to start over with a new woman from scratch. That's not easy, from any perspective.

To make the first paragraph happen, there's a lot of coordination involved and infrastructure requirements. You need a good enough job to afford a smartphone, because it is so much harder to get a girl's number if you are pulling out a feature phone when you get her number. In a major metropolitan area, that would make a girl laugh at you. Also, you need a well located apartment that is in a singles friendly area. Sometimes, those apartments can be pricey. So to afford the lifestyle, you need to take college and work seriously, which takes a lot of effort too.

skullshank

TIL: how wendyterry lost the 78lbs

MyChocolateDiet

Maybe I'm really simple but for me at age 26:

1) if I were married to the guy &/or had kids with him, I'd stay and get counseling or something,
2) but if I were not married to him, I'd leave.

TheSlorax

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

sex with minimal effort? if my SO put minimal effort into sex I would not be happy or satisfied. at all. it also wouldn't be readily available... no sex is better than bad sex. once again, you guys are real winners.

This is a semantical issue. I think there's confusion as to what effort actually is. The first instance of sex requires the most amount of effort from the male perspective. Outside of the framework of one night stands, you need to approach someone, build some sort of meaningful rapport, go out on some dates, get her in a private setting, continuously escalate physically. After the first few instances of sex, the amount of effort per instance of sex is less because the initial efforts have already been made. I'm not advocating taking sex for granted within the confines of a relationship, but it is much easier to keep someone happy that you've already started with than start over from the beginning.

Also, and a woman would never consider this, there's something called the cumulative effect. That means, for every time that a man's efforts with one time fails, he has to start over with a new woman from scratch. That's not easy, from any perspective.

To make the first paragraph happen, there's a lot of coordination involved and infrastructure requirements. You need a good enough job to afford a smartphone, because it is so much harder to get a girl's number if you are pulling out a feature phone when you get her number. In a major metropolitan area, that would make a girl laugh at you. Also, you need a well located apartment that is in a singles friendly area. Sometimes, those apartments can be pricey. So to afford the lifestyle, you need to take college and work seriously, which takes a lot of effort too.

I am actually surprised and impressed at this post. I understand where you were going with that now. although I am still slightly disappointed your biggest motivation for a relationship is the readily available sex, I appreciate the explanation.

MyChocolateDiet

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

sex with minimal effort? if my SO put minimal effort into sex I would not be happy or satisfied. at all. it also wouldn't be readily available... no sex is better than bad sex. once again, you guys are real winners.

This is a semantical issue. I think there's confusion as to what effort actually is. The first instance of sex requires the most amount of effort from the male perspective. Outside of the framework of one night stands, you need to approach someone, build some sort of meaningful rapport, go out on some dates, get her in a private setting, continuously escalate physically. After the first few instances of sex, the amount of effort per instance of sex is less because the initial efforts have already been made. I'm not advocating taking sex for granted within the confines of a relationship, but it is much easier to keep someone happy that you've already started with than start over from the beginning.

Also, and a woman would never consider this, there's something called the cumulative effect. That means, for every time that a man's efforts with one time fails, he has to start over with a new woman from scratch. That's not easy, from any perspective.

To make the first paragraph happen, there's a lot of coordination involved and infrastructure requirements. You need a good enough job to afford a smartphone, because it is so much harder to get a girl's number if you are pulling out a feature phone when you get her number. In a major metropolitan area, that would make a girl laugh at you. Also, you need a well located apartment that is in a singles friendly area. Sometimes, those apartments can be pricey. So to afford the lifestyle, you need to take college and work seriously, which takes a lot of effort too.

Oh, thanks for claryfying. I thought you were too lazy to even unzip your pants.

ractrev

Just wow to the meth advice!!

What I will tell you, is that I married into a situation very similar to yours. We had no passion for each other right from the start. After 20 years of living like roommates (We loved each other - that was not the trouble) I decided I could not do it anymore. It is no way to live your life at all. You need the passion and romance, or you will just look for it somewhere else. Ask me how I know.

wheird

Maybe I'm really simple but for me at age 26:

1) if I were married to the guy &/or had kids with him, I'd stay and get counseling or something,
2) but if I were not married to him, I'd leave.

Qft

MyChocolateDiet

TIL: how wendyterry lost the 78lbs

LOL your profile pic looks like an astronout's vagina. NASA-vaj.

skullshank

TIL: how wendyterry lost the 78lbs

LOL your profile pic looks like an astronout's vagina. NASA-vaj.

talk about deep space! :drinker:

BusyRaeNOTBusty

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

sex with minimal effort? if my SO put minimal effort into sex I would not be happy or satisfied. at all. it also wouldn't be readily available... no sex is better than bad sex. once again, you guys are real winners.

This is a semantical issue. I think there's confusion as to what effort actually is. The first instance of sex requires the most amount of effort from the male perspective. Outside of the framework of one night stands, you need to approach someone, build some sort of meaningful rapport, go out on some dates, get her in a private setting, continuously escalate physically. After the first few instances of sex, the amount of effort per instance of sex is less because the initial efforts have already been made. I'm not advocating taking sex for granted within the confines of a relationship, but it is much easier to keep someone happy that you've already started with than start over from the beginning.

Also, and a woman would never consider this, there's something called the cumulative effect. That means, for every time that a man's efforts with one time fails, he has to start over with a new woman from scratch. That's not easy, from any perspective.

To make the first paragraph happen, there's a lot of coordination involved and infrastructure requirements. You need a good enough job to afford a smartphone, because it is so much harder to get a girl's number if you are pulling out a feature phone when you get her number. In a major metropolitan area, that would make a girl laugh at you. Also, you need a well located apartment that is in a singles friendly area. Sometimes, those apartments can be pricey. So to afford the lifestyle, you need to take college and work seriously, which takes a lot of effort too.

I am actually surprised and impressed at this post. I understand where you were going with that now. although I am still slightly disappointed your biggest motivation for a relationship is the readily available sex, I appreciate the explanation.

I guess, when you ultimately dislike and have no respect for women, sex is all they are good for.

ldrosophila

LOL you people offer some interesting advice. Talk to him, let him know kindly that he's a wonderful man and you love being intimate with him. Relationships are cyclical sometimes youll be like sweaty rabbits and other times youll be like an old marry couple. The longer you are in a relationship the more you realize how it cycles.

NVM this sentence tells me what you already know:

I feel kinda messed up that I sometimes want him to fall in love with someone else, so we can split, but he can be happy about it....

ldrosophila

TIL: how wendyterry lost the 78lbs

LOL your profile pic looks like an astronout's vagina. NASA-vaj.

woah it does some futuristic sex doll

MyChocolateDiet

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

I do like the chase on occasion. But, sex with minimal effort is definitely the biggest perk of being in a relationship.

sex with minimal effort? if my SO put minimal effort into sex I would not be happy or satisfied. at all. it also wouldn't be readily available... no sex is better than bad sex. once again, you guys are real winners.

This is a semantical issue. I think there's confusion as to what effort actually is. The first instance of sex requires the most amount of effort from the male perspective. Outside of the framework of one night stands, you need to approach someone, build some sort of meaningful rapport, go out on some dates, get her in a private setting, continuously escalate physically. After the first few instances of sex, the amount of effort per instance of sex is less because the initial efforts have already been made. I'm not advocating taking sex for granted within the confines of a relationship, but it is much easier to keep someone happy that you've already started with than start over from the beginning.

Also, and a woman would never consider this, there's something called the cumulative effect. That means, for every time that a man's efforts with one time fails, he has to start over with a new woman from scratch. That's not easy, from any perspective.

To make the first paragraph happen, there's a lot of coordination involved and infrastructure requirements. You need a good enough job to afford a smartphone, because it is so much harder to get a girl's number if you are pulling out a feature phone when you get her number. In a major metropolitan area, that would make a girl laugh at you. Also, you need a well located apartment that is in a singles friendly area. Sometimes, those apartments can be pricey. So to afford the lifestyle, you need to take college and work seriously, which takes a lot of effort too.

I am actually surprised and impressed at this post. I understand where you were going with that now. although I am still slightly disappointed your biggest motivation for a relationship is the readily available sex, I appreciate the explanation.

I guess, when you ultimately dislike and have no respect for women, sex is all they are good for.

I ultimately dislike and have no respect for certain women. And I have no sexual use for them. They are still good for a sammich though.

MyChocolateDiet

TIL: how wendyterry lost the 78lbs

LOL your profile pic looks like an astronout's vagina. NASA-vaj.

talk about deep space! :drinker:

I am hearing darth vader breathing along with it. Eerie experience.

gmoneycole

bump

TheSlorax

I guess, when you ultimately dislike and have no respect for women, sex is all they are good for.

I already knew that was his attitude, but I expected that and his response was at least thoughtful. it made sense. I still don't approve of or agree with it, but he's entitled to his opinion and motivations, I just ask that they're presented well.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

The point of being in a relationship is steady sex with minimal effort for the next instance of sex.

Not sure to :huh: or :laugh: