How are YOU setting yourself up to fail?

Cortelli

[. . .]

I've had the controlling boyfriend too. The same scenario, without the food emphasis, he basically wanted to keep me all to himself.

[. . .]

So a masochist, then? Don Quixote tilting at windmills?

Nice post!

Nope. Did you miss the "kicked to the curb" part? Thing is, this type of guy doesn't shake your hand when you meet him and say "Hi, I'm a controlling a__h___, and I'd like to make your life miserable for the next couple of years, what do you say?" You only discover that he's a controlling a__h___ AFTER he thinks it's too difficult and bothersome for you to get away from him. That's how they operate. Of course, NOW I can spot those jerks a mile away, but when I was in my twenties? Not so much.

Hehe -- I was referring to the dude. While controlling AHs are indeed talented at hiding it, I was struggling to imagine him meeting and getting to know you, and then thinking to himself "I can bend her to my will . . ." :noway:

Sorry to hijack -- back to the thread.

WendyTerry420

Your post speaks more about you than the people you are trying to belittle. Congrats.

So you missed the point of the OP....bummer. It was a good one.

HermioneDanger118

Roomba?! :laugh: I guess trying to balance on it while it's moving could work your core :drinker:

Or you could dance to DJ Roomba ... Parks & Rec, anyone?

Rage_Phish

Roomba?! :laugh: I guess trying to balance on it while it's moving could work your core :drinker:

Or you could dance to DJ Roomba ... Parks & Rec, anyone?

Dj ROOOOOMMMBBAAA

Amandainyaface

Can we get an AMEN?

meganjcallaghan

I don't fail. I decide to do something and I do it. The end. As far as exercise is concerned, people should keep in mind that it doesn't burn calories in the sense that it's going to take pounds off of you....but it will trim inches and reshape you

Koldnomore

The OP is not responsible for others motivation. Only for her own ideas and thoughts. If people will be put off by her directness, their resolve to improve their health wasn't very strong or internalized to begin with.

I think part of what is wrong with modern society is the sense of entitlement to "gentle" treatment to the point of lack of honesty. I'll take straight talk any day. I've grown more in my lifetime from honest feedback, whether I liked hearing it or not.

DING DING DING! Get this guy/gal a cookie

Francl27

Excellent post!

liloldDee

Great post, there are a few similar on here at the moment but I've decided to honour you with a reply. ;-)

After years of dieting, following everything from weightwatchers to lipotrim, crediting them for my losses, blaming them for my gains, I've finally changed my way of thinking. Honestly it's taken a couple of years for my brain to fully accept thinking similar to yours, on another board, I've had rows, arguments, tantrums and hissyfits about how such and such a diet was great and worked. It's literally been rammed down my mouth that calories in v calories out is what it's all about, that the more satisfied I am while dieting the longer I will stick to the diet, that if I create a moderate calorie deficit and lose slowly I am more likely to keep my weight off, that having a cheat, means a cheat meal not a cheat day/ weekend and that I still need to be counted in my calories in.

I had been brainwashed by the diet plans that tell you if you fall off the wagon get back on and put it behind you, that's true to an extent but when your doing it everyweek you won't lose weight.
This time my diet consists of eating foods I love, losing weight slowly, realising it's not a diet but a sustainable lifestyle change, that the exercise I'm doing fits into my life easily and I won't struggle in future to keep up the same level.

I would like to thank people like yourself who dogmatically state what they know to be true, it would be a lot easier to stop posting or go along with what posters want to hear. I'm sure you often feel like your banging your head off a brick wall but just know that eventually common sense does prevail, it just takes time to undo years of ill informed rubbish.

mmapags

The OP is not responsible for others motivation. Only for her own ideas and thoughts. If people will be put off by her directness, their resolve to improve their health wasn't very strong or internalized to begin with.

I think part of what is wrong with modern society is the sense of entitlement to "gentle" treatment to the point of lack of honesty. I'll take straight talk any day. I've grown more in my lifetime from honest feedback, whether I liked hearing it or not.

DING DING DING! Get this guy/gal a cookie

Thanks! Just so happens I have room for a cookie in my macros for the day! lolz
And I am very much a guy.

abatonfan

Because before finals, I noticed a big change in my habits, my energy levels, and weight loss. With the holidays and finals, its been difficult getting back on track.

So why do you think keto is the way to address these issues? Honestly, keto sounds like a much harder way to lose weight than good old-fashioned calorie restriction. You're basically doing calorie restriction with keto anyway, it's just got this candy coating of A Diet Plan around it. That's like Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, and all the others, they're just Calorie Restriction for Dummies. Ketosis is a real thing and it does cause weight loss, but not any faster than calorie restriction, and it can certainly be more unpleasant if you crave foods that aren't on the menu. Keto is for people who crave those foods anyway. I came to MFP last September to lose 17 pounds. I lost 18 pounds, and I've managed to keep it off through the holidays. I didn't deprive myself of the foods I loved before, I just made a few smart substitutions to knock out hidden calories, and made sure that I always had enough food volume to feel psychologically "full". And I watched that calorie limit like a hawk. That's all I did. No exercise, no "clean eating", no keto. I ate McDonald's every morning, but I got the 250-calorie Egg White Delight McMuffin rather than diabetes-in-a-bag McGriddles or whatever. I still felt like I had a decent-sized breakfast, and it's yummy. So my question is, if the GOAL is to lose weight, why introduce more deprivation and suffering than you absolutely have to?

Those diet plans are a huge pet peeve. They are, literally, a simple and "easy" solution to lose weight quickly, but they do not teach anything about maintaining the weight. Once someone comes off one of those "lose five pounds in the first week while eating everything you want" diet, they are more likely going to gain the weight back unless they know how to measure out everything they eat and accurately count calories.

There is a risk with a ketoic diet, especially for developing ketoacidosis. I ended up losing over 50 pounds within the past few months, thought "lolz i is gud with dietin" , and I unexpectedly went into diabetic ketoacidosis (and soon diagnosed as a type 1 diabetic) less than two months ago and could have easily died if I waited a few days, if not hours, to get myself checked out. Ketoic diets will cause the body to break down fat and cause ketones (slightly acididc metabolic bodies), and if the body cannot maintain the blood's pH levels, ketoacidosis can occur.

I tried dieting as my "new year's resolution" in 2012 and, looking at it now, sucked at it. I did not lose the weight I wanted to lose, because I knew nothing about portion sizes. I thought that a full 3-cup bowl would equal one serving of pasta (LOL!), and I gave up dieting within three months and maybe only lost one jean size.

Now, I NEED to measure everything I eat in order to determine how much insulin I have to take, or I could risk incredibly high glucose, DKA, and diabetes-related complications. Now that I am measuring stuff out and tracking my carbs on MFP, I find it a lot easier to maintain my weight than my previous "guesstimate my serving" method.

I am hoping I can lose the last 15 pounds I need to lose to get to a healthy weight. I was at that weight the day before I went into DKA, so I know it is possible if I create a caloric deficit for myself. It is not some magical weight loss fairy sprinkling magic weight loss dust that instantly let me go down to 120 pounds. :laugh:

Livgetfit

BUMP

fattymcrunnerpants

Agree with the message but not the delivery. Only because I my Roomba

BlackPup

Thanks for the reminder of what's important. I think in my excitement at the whole New Years resolutions thing I **may** just of forgotten the most important point that the only bit that is essential is maintaining a deficit.

OP, a great and timely reminder, thanks again

gigglesinthesun

I had originally put myself on a detox of the forums for January, but clearly I have no will power (how ever did I lose my weight??? I know ... calorie counting :happy: )

What irks me with all the exercise touted as the panacea of weight loss is that you only need to go and sit in a café in or near a gym and you see all these people worn out from their exercise class munching on a piece of cheesecake and a large cappuccino. With nearly a 1000 cals on the plate in front of them, they'd be much better off skipping the exercise and avoiding the temptations in the café, because the chances that they actually burned off a 1000 cals in exercise are pretty slim - unless of course they did some light cleaning and food preparation 'cause then they totally burned that of in less then an hour :laugh:

linsey0689

Nice post

SLLRunner

While I haven't always agreed with your tone and some of your points, I have always concurred with your basic premise of calories in vs out and that logging needs to be as accurate and consistent as possible. I do like and appreciate this post, nicely done siansonea.

Thanks. I know I'm a holy terror sometimes. :flowerforyou:

Yes, you are a holy terror at times, but you are to the point.:bigsmile: I appreciate your post.

Phaedra2014

if you're not losing or losing too slowly, you need to eat less.


Or in some cases, eat more.

Siansonea

if you're not losing or losing too slowly, you need to eat less.


Or in some cases, eat more.

:huh: Ah, the spectre of Starvation Mode™ rears its improbably cherubic head...:huh:

Phaedra2014

if you're not losing or losing too slowly, you need to eat less.


Or in some cases, eat more.

:huh: Ah, the spectre of Starvation Mode™ rears its improbably cherubic head...:huh:

Don't project. I never mentioned starvation mode. It's an absurd term that doesn't apply here.