How do you know it is time to settle down?
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1. Are you at a point in your life where you want to settle down? Will you miss being single, or feel like you missed out, if you do?
2. Are you with someone you can't imagine living without?
3. Are you sure you can live (actually cohabitant) with that person?
4. How are your conflict management skills as a couple? Can you communicate openly? Fight fairly?
5. Are you sexually attracted to/ passionate about that person?
6. Do you and that person have similar life goals?0 -
1. Are you at a point in your life where you want to settle down? Will you miss being single, or feel like you missed out, if you do?
2. Are you with someone you can't imagine living without?
3. Are you sure you can live (actually cohabitant) with that person?
4. How are your conflict management skills as a couple? Can you communicate openly? Fight fairly?
5. Are you sexually attracted to/ passionate about that person?
6. Do you and that person have similar life goals?
These are great questions to ask yourself!
Although in short, I really do think you will "just know" and that if you have to ask, it's probably not time yet.0 -
YES! when I had my first ultrasound and the doctor said "o, theres two!", well first I cried for two days then realized big changes were coming!As a person that did everything in a truly effed up order, I realized it was time to settle down when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. My personal "it's time to settle down" moment had nothing to do with a spouse or boyfriend but everything to do with my child.
Their dad did not come around until they were nearly a year old. He has been through hell and back with me. At first, I was with him because of the kids. But after being together for four years and really getting to know what an amazing person he is, I know that even if these girls were never born, I would still want to be with him. Hes my best friend, and I think thats a big part of why we have made it through so much crap, and why get along so well
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I didn't know it was time, honestly. But I knew I felt differently about my husband, than all the others that came before him and felt like if I was going to make it work with anyone, it would be him. I was 27 at the time and lived been on my own enough and been in enough "this isn't going to work" relationships to know what I needed and what I didn't. Husband fit those requirements, so I jumped.
Didn't you mention in another thread that you got pregnant and then decided to get married? I'm sure this had to have at least a little influence in your decision to settle down.
As the other half of the story, I am going to go ahead and say that it didn't. We both had the option of either settling down with each other, or going our separate ways. We chose the former because we genuinely liked and loved one another. She didn't settle for me because she needed someone to help her, and I didn't settle for her out of some sense of obligation.
Always remember that when you assume, you end up making an a** out of you... but not me.
Is that the story she told you?
Sounds like you both had very few options. She either had the option of being a single mother or settling down with you. You don't seem like the kind of guy that would really have any other options anyway.
Good options are not in abundance here.
Your class and intelligence are really shining though. You should go easy those of us who are so unfortunate as to have so few options in life.
Look at how miserable and unfortunate we looked the day we got married:
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so it is not too soon if we have been together 2 months? great! whomever may see us would say we have been together for years
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My now husband proposed to me after 6 months - he could have done it at 2 months and I would still have said yes. So no, not too soon - and as so many other posters have said, you do just know. When spending time with that person is the most important thing, when the prospect of growing old together makes you happy, when you would do anything for them through the good times and the bad (and this is most important through the bad) then you know. Enjoy!0 -
Look at how miserable and unfortunate we looked the day we got married:
You two are a gorgeous couple!!
I don't know what that other guy's problem is. Maybe he needs a cookie.
ETA: OP, you sound like you have found a great match for yourself. Congrats, and enjoy!! :drinker:0 -
If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time. 0
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No real good time, just when you're ready. I married too early and now I'm regretting it.
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I think you just KNOW.
I was with my hubby 10 years before we got married...and I don't regret it for a second!0 -
When other MFP'ers dream of your wedding...
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When she makes and serves you breakfast...
...and you've determined the lock is unpickable.0 -
You'll be here in a year and you know it...
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Your class and intelligence are really shining though. You should go easy those of us who are so unfortunate as to have so few options in life.
It is evident in abundance to everyone in the thread. Credibility is not just handed out, it's earned. The vast gulf between your credibility and his is clear to anyone reading this thread alone.
:drinker:0 -
After a two year long friendship, I realized I was in love and wanted him in every way. And not too long after that I went away to India for a couple months and he went canoeing through the everglades with a biologist friend. Being so far apart, we both realized we wanted to be together. I was feeling it and then received a letter from him saying the same. When I finally got home we talked about it. Then after a little more time, we lived together for our summer internship (I was still in school and he had graduated). And it was so wonderful living together that he proposed to me on the Golden Gate Bridge at sunset and we danced down the bridge. And he decided to get a job closer to the college, and I lived with him during the field work term and breaks. A year later I graduated and we got married.0
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I will NEVER share a toothbrush! NEVER!If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.0 -
Truth is that I don't know anymore.
*Happily Divorced*0 -
well he cleaned up mine...If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.0 -
well he cleaned up mine...If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.
I've cleaned up his, but he doesn't clean up mine (then again, I make to the toilet in time!) He has held my hair back for me. Poor guy, vomit makes him vomit.
As far as toothbrushes go, not sharing. And if I did, he'd probably lose it, because he doesn't event like sharing silverware or drinking glasses.0 -
He sounds like me. I won't share food. I mean, he can have some, but I won't eat anything that his mouth or silverware has touched (this goes for everyone -- including my daughter) and DO NOT TOUCH MY TOWEL!!!
well he cleaned up mine...If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.
I've cleaned up his, but he doesn't clean up mine (then again, I make to the toilet in time!) He has held my hair back for me. Poor guy, vomit makes him vomit.
As far as toothbrushes go, not sharing. And if I did, he'd probably lose it, because he doesn't event like sharing silverware or drinking glasses.0 -
He sounds like me. I won't share food. I mean, he can have some, but I won't eat anything that his mouth or silverware has touched (this goes for everyone -- including my daughter) and DO NOT TOUCH MY TOWEL!!!
well he cleaned up mine...If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.
I've cleaned up his, but he doesn't clean up mine (then again, I make to the toilet in time!) He has held my hair back for me. Poor guy, vomit makes him vomit.
As far as toothbrushes go, not sharing. And if I did, he'd probably lose it, because he doesn't event like sharing silverware or drinking glasses.
For sure! i can have a bite of his food, using my own silverware. Others can't even share the food, so I'm still special. And I'm the no-towel sharing person! No touching my towel! 0 -
We don't care about silverwear or towels, we share those, and we bite of each others anything and drink of each others glasses. But a toothbrush shall not be shared ever.0
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When you've hated babies all your life and now think they're cute haha0
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We were out for dinner a couple months ago and I let him have a taste of my soup off my spoon. I told him that was how he knows I love him. lol
He sounds like me. I won't share food. I mean, he can have some, but I won't eat anything that his mouth or silverware has touched (this goes for everyone -- including my daughter) and DO NOT TOUCH MY TOWEL!!!
well he cleaned up mine...If you can share a toothbrush and clean up their vomit, then it's time.
I've cleaned up his, but he doesn't clean up mine (then again, I make to the toilet in time!) He has held my hair back for me. Poor guy, vomit makes him vomit.
As far as toothbrushes go, not sharing. And if I did, he'd probably lose it, because he doesn't event like sharing silverware or drinking glasses.
For sure! i can have a bite of his food, using my own silverware. Others can't even share the food, so I'm still special. And I'm the no-towel sharing person! No touching my towel!0 -
When you're not that good at "macking" anymore.
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Too short, not enough details.
Trolling0 -
When you can't imagine a future without that person in it... and there definitely has to be another person involved before you know you're ready.0
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Well, it's pretty rare to find wedding pictures that the couple look miserable. Compare a divorced couples before and after wedding pics to confirm this.:laugh:
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
When youve got about 15 cats0
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